Best vetting questions?

[Gamisch]

Advice from the old lady:

Open ended questions where she can reveal who she is and you can learn alot by listening. But low key open ended questions...here are some good examples:

If you have a free weekend what do you enjoy?" Follow up with "That's cool. How did you get into that?" and that leads into an interesting conversation.

Let her chat and ask follow up questions. Listen NOT for your turn to speak (nobody likes the conversationalist who always tries to 'one up' the other person), instead really listen, smile, chuckle, and engage with this female human in front of you.

Open ended questions like "How did you get into that?" and follow ups will take you far.

Added bonus: As she reveals more of herself you, in a listening stance, reveal less about yourself. This maintains some mystery and intrigue. Mystery and intrigue are hella attractive. When you combine that with taking an interest in her (listening) you are also getting her to invest in you.

Dale Carnegie had it correct decades ago when he said everyone's favorite topic is themselves. People will eat out of your hand if they feel seen and heard.

Learn this art and learn it well. It can serve you in many environments, not just dating.

Great contribution.

Thank U ma'am.

 

[Gamisch]

As for me, a verification question that I never ask, but I notice, is when a woman feels and is at ease around me. Essentially an IOI, but they usually do it in many ways, and I would like to ask them, "Do you feel that comfortable?" But I never ask the question.

(I wonder if it's a common thing and if it happens to you as well.)

I've noticed that the better I feel about myself ,the easier people feel comfortable around me.

Sometimes women go a bit too fast tho..

The reason why I made this thread was because it's the jab. Basic moves that cannot be practiced enough.

 

[jhonny9546]

I've noticed that the better I feel about myself ,the easier people feel comfortable around me.

Exactly What I was trying to say before. This might be the "relaxation" they feel about me.

Really, it's like when you're calm but big like a lion and there are people near you who understand that.


Additionally, when a woman exhibits the common IOI of twirling her hair, it is often because she is experiencing a sensation akin to "itching" due to attraction.

If you are relaxed in such a situation and she is feeling this way, are you connecting with her, or should you respond differently rather than remaining calm?

It's somewhat unusual, but when I am calm, women often start twirling their hair.
Could a man's calmness and ability to stay in silence evoke this sensation in a woman, rather than start playing, being fun, with her?