Attracted To A Married Woman

[Powerlifter]

I have notice the past couple days she is in a sense ignoring me and also seems to avoid me. She use to walk by my mothers room and give a big smile everytime I was in there. I believe the reason is the last time I was in the therpy room she was talking with her co worker and was talking about her job and then made mention of her husband after awhile when she didn't make any eye contact or address me being there right next to her I just got up and walked out and didn't return and went and waited in my mothers room and I guess you could say I was being anal. She then came walking by the room a couple times trying to get my attention by talking louder and I could see at the corner of my eye she was looking in but I just ignored her and kept watching the TV.

I then stayed away or made other times to go see my mother and didn't see her for over a week until yesterday I came in and was in the hallway when another co worker came out and says to her your husband called and said he is waiting when I made or tried to make eye contact with her while she was walking with a patient she looked down and walked into the rehab room.

I miss her smile and I can't believe I am this taken by this lady who just happened to be married it's hard to just walk away but from the feel of things I have no other choice.

Through it all I never gave her a compliment but was waiting for opportunities to make mention that I really digged her smile whenever she looked at me unlike she would give anyone else it was something I felt on a deeper level that she was digging me but couldn't understand why I wasn't making a move on her or at least giving a compliment but I always smiled and always spoke to her whenever I would see her.

Anyway, just venting and giving a update but something tells me if I would have taken it further I would have had her but looked like I shut her switch off by being to aloof.

 

[Powerlifter]

Double post.

 

[Powerlifter]

Double post

 

[Drum&Bass]

I dunno dude, you kinda remind me of a chick or a high school geek that has a crush. Good for you that you didnt hook up with a married woman....but how do you not have the social skills to keep constant contact with her if your so into her ???

I dont understand why your making things so complicated ??? (or why you keep talking about how warm her smile is and her attractiveness)

If you liked this woman so much why weren't you able to be cool with her and enjoy her company. You do realize your not obligated to sleep with her if you choose not to...

and WHAT THE HELL IS THE DEAL WITH YOUR CHEESY A$$ GAME PLAYING ??!??? ignoring her on purpose and over analyzing little things she does..spare me bro..In reality I think this chick realized what a wimp you really are and your probably no better than her husband. She's probably feeling embarrassed that she ever went for you, but women hate being ignored especially by pansy's. In her eyes you are well beneath her level and she's probably thinking who does this loser think he is by ignoring me.

....the only thing cool about you is your screen name.

 

[Powerlifter]

Actually I am going to agree with you DB I need an old fashion ass kicking on top of that and realize my mistake...I really don't understand myself with this behavior especially at my age by ignoring her was properly due to the fact I wanted to avoid the nice guy trap play a bit hard to get and avoid the friends zone.

As far as finding the time to speak to her I kept distance in the fact the lady was working and I didn't want to impose my romantic interest especially while my Mom is still gravely ill and didn't feel it would have been appropiate and didn't really know how to ask a married woman out if in fact her flirting was with intent.

Crazy I know.

 

[zekko]

If you liked this woman so much why weren't you able to be cool with her and enjoy her company

That's not really what they teach you around here though, is it?
They want you to GAME her, not be too available, not be thinking about her too much, be indifferent, etc.

Here's a good case where it didn't work. Even if she didn't want an affair she was apparently enjoying the flirt with Powerlifter. Then he withdrew his interest, so she withdrew hers. Apparently a more upfront and friendly approach was called for.

 

[Powerlifter]

True Zekko another way to look at it now I don't feel so punished.

Thanks

 

[jophil28]

Here's a good case where it didn't work. Even if she didn't want an affair she was apparently enjoying the flirt with Powerlifter. Then he withdrew his interest, so she withdrew hers.

Good point Zekko.

Women often respond to flirting by men in ways that resemble feminine romantic interest. Women love male attention as much (or more than ) they love chocolate, or Prado.

And there is the stumbling block. Just because a woman ( married or not ) returns a man's flirt does NOT mean that she wants it to progress into a date. Women are natural flirts , they learn how to quickly and easily command a man's attention at an early age, and they do it skillfully.

The only way to seperate out the women who are just attention seeking from those who are open to dating you, is to ask for her number.

 

[Powerlifter]

I dunno dude, you kinda remind me of a chick or a high school geek that has a crush. Good for you that you didnt hook up with a married woman....but how do you not have the social skills to keep constant contact with her if your so into her ???

I dont understand why your making things so complicated ??? (or why you keep talking about how warm her smile is and her attractiveness)

If you liked this woman so much why weren't you able to be cool with her and enjoy her company. You do realize your not obligated to sleep with her if you choose not to...

and WHAT THE HELL IS THE DEAL WITH YOUR CHEESY A$$ GAME PLAYING ??!??? ignoring her on purpose and over analyzing little things she does..spare me bro..In reality I think this chick realized what a wimp you really are and your probably no better than her husband. She's probably feeling embarrassed that she ever went for you, but women hate being ignored especially by pansy's. In her eyes you are well beneath her level and she's probably thinking who does this loser think he is by ignoring me.

....the only thing cool about you is your screen name.

After I reread your response I realize your response is only a response to lift your ego. Calling a brother a wimp and pansy when he comes here for insight and information during a tough time isn't the right atittude to have. It would be better served to point out the mistakes and then let it be at that. I am far from a pansy and a wimp bro...and have a very successful dating life but was trying to come to terms as to why I was having such a time with this lady who happens to be married and who helps my ill mother with her therepy.

My suggestion to you would be get off your high horse and be more considerate toward another brother when he comes here for help with the opposite sex and you just might get more reps in the process.

Powerlifter

 

[Drum&Bass]

ok, fair enough, was my assessment of the situation incorrect ?? Its easy for guys to get down for a long period of time over attractive women who show interest in us and then take it away. I've been down that road before, a majority of us have been down that road before...

Its 1 girl out of many. You didnt even develop a true relationship with her. If your dating life is so successful call up a friend go out somewhere and find a nice set of t!ts and thighs to take your mind off the previous girl thats got you down.

Its only 1 woman..out of MANY MANY WOMEN...take this as a learning experience and become better or take it as a reminder and find another woman that gives you the same feelings who has less issues to deal with.

You have to train yourself to get hurt minimally, because in the grand scheme of YOUR life what have you truly lost by not keeping in contact with this woman ?? Do you honestly believe you wont find another woman just as good if not better in this great big world ???

Im sure your a nice guy, but you need to harden up.

and I actually like riding on my high horse, it gives me hindsight and confidence. the next post you make better be about some OTHER woman you met. keep playing the game till you get a winning hand.
:rock:

 

[zekko]

And there is the stumbling block. Just because a woman ( married or not ) returns a man's flirt does NOT mean that she wants it to progress into a date. Women are natural flirts , they learn how to quickly and easily command a man's attention at an early age, and they do it skillfully.

And that's why so many men are so confused as to when a woman is seriously interested in them. It is so common for women to casually flirt that you never know if they mean it or not. I've been very guilty of this in the past. I know I've missed out on several windows of opportunities with girls because I thought they were just being flirty. Then I find out later they were attracted to me. D'oh!

 

[Falcon25]

I am in love with a married woman I slept with last year. If there is one thing I can say to you, if there is one advice I can give you. Do not go this path. If you ever consider sleeping with a married woman, it has to be one and done and you never see her again. It is the worst situation that a man can put himself in with women. You cannot have her, you cannot hold her, sleep with her, she made her vows to another man. She will also cheat on you, if she cheats on him. Nothing good comes of it. Stop wasting time. I waisted 12 months worrying and waiting and wondering what could it have been with a woman that was never going to be mine. Save your effort and energy for a lady that can return the favor, a single lady.

 

[( . )( . )]

I am in love with a married woman I slept with last year. If there is one thing I can say to you, if there is one advice I can give you. Do not go this path. If you ever consider sleeping with a married woman, it has to be one and done and you never see her again. It is the worst situation that a man can put himself in with women. You cannot have her, you cannot hold her, sleep with her, she made her vows to another man. She will also cheat on you, if she cheats on him. Nothing good comes of it. Stop wasting time. I waisted 12 months worrying and waiting and wondering what could it have been with a woman that was never going to be mine. Save your effort and energy for a lady that can return the favor, a single lady.

This could not be further from the truth. Pretty much everything you said I disagree with. Married women are great, more fool you for waiting and being in "love" and dont even get me started on the ridiculous "she will cheat because she cheated on him" bullsh!t again. Also I honestly love the idea she goes home to her husband after we've had our fun. It is the perfect setup. The only downside is public places are a no go, and wondering if she's smart enough to cover all her tracks.

 

[zekko]

dont even get me started on the ridiculous "she will cheat because she cheated on him" bullsh!t again. Also I honestly love the idea she goes home to her husband after we've had our fun. It is the perfect setup.

This may not be what you meant, but I agree that "she will cheat because she cheated on him" is not necessarily true. In most cases it is, but there are some exceptions. In some cases, the girl is just hooked up with a poor match and is wanting out.

Clearly everybody here has their own unique set of goals. You have the guys who are only interested in sex, period, and nothing else. Then there are the guys looking to find that "special someone". And everything in between. What you are looking for affects what sort of approach you should take.

 

[Falcon25]

This could not be further from the truth. Pretty much everything you said I disagree with. Married women are great, more fool you for waiting and being in "love" and dont even get me started on the ridiculous "she will cheat because she cheated on him" bullsh!t again. Also I honestly love the idea she goes home to her husband after we've had our fun. It is the perfect setup. The only downside is public places are a no go, and wondering if she's smart enough to cover all her tracks.

I have slept with seven married women. It is something I will never do again. If this is the path you choose, then so be it. But the road is dirty and it could get you heartbroken, killed, or even worse, your future wife could do the same to you. You say you love the idea she goes to her husband after you are with her, you have a long way to go on being a man of integrity and character. I learned the hard way, the seventh one showed me that what I was doing was wrong. It is a disgusting and horrible way to live. To sleep with another man's wife is nothing to be proud of. I'm sorry you feel this way. You will realize one day that this is wrong.

 

[( . )( . )]

But the road is dirty and it could get you heartbroken, killed, or even worse, your future wife could do the same to you.

My fictitious future wife "cheating" on me is worse than being killed?

You say you love the idea she goes to her husband after you are with her, you have a long way to go on being a man of integrity and character.

I got integrity and character coming out of my ass, your ideas of moral character are just different to mine.

the seventh one showed me that what I was doing was wrong.

Phuck off, you fell in "love" with the 7th one, you waited for her, realised she would never be yours and from what you posted sounds like she also cheated on you. So basically you let your heart get ripped out, now all of a sudden you decide your "cured" and decide in your opinion that it's morally wrong... Yeah right, get the hell outta here.

To sleep with another man's wife is nothing to be proud of.

No your right, thats the first thing I agree with. But I'm not ashamed either.

 

[Powerlifter]

I wonder if I can salvage the connection with this lady by starting up flirting or some other way to let her know I am interested in getting to know her better unless I've totally blown it.

Tittyman your post make alot of sense and I agree not every woman who has an affair is going to do the same with you.

 

[grayclif]

PL - You started this post a week ago and your still thinking bout this woman. Forget about her yo! It's just not worth it. Sneaking around, jealousy and abnormal dating practices all will make for a very awkward situation.

Just move on man. Get your own.

 

[jophil28]

Tittyman your post make alot of sense and I agree not every woman who has an affair is going to do the same with you.

Who would take that risk.

A woman who cheats on her husband has demonstrated her willingness to betray him for her own gratification. Her "reasons" are irrelevant. Her actions speak loudly all by themselves.

I am not proud about admitting to screwing two married women .
Because they were married women at the time I never considered either as fit for a "relationship" with me.

There are much better and nore worthy candidates.

 

[( . )( . )]

I think it's funny so many guys would say "Don't do it !! She'll cheat on you too!".

A married woman who cheats isn't there for another man to have. She's there for another man to enjoy while she tries to regain the bearings on her marriage and her life.

Hallelujah !

Question for ya tits (although a bit off topic from the wife discussion),

What makes you think a woman that cheated on her first man with you, would not cheat on you?

I never said if I drop the ball and she finds a shinier alternative she wouldn't (I'd hope she would in all honesty, but thats for another topic)

What I'm saying and this is the part alot of you guys seem to not understand is that it's pretty much common knowledge women dont like to let go of one branch until they have a firm grip on another, would you agree with that?
Now having established that, it does not make any logical sense that just because the woman signed a marriage certificate it makes her more prone to cheat than a woman who isnt, yet both naturally do the exact same thing when looking for a new man to upgrade the old one.

Wtf am I alone on this? I thought all this is common sense.