I still haven't had to urge to call yet, which is a good thing. I know I need to get over this girl, and I am, I just can't wait for the moment when all of my feelings subside. Everytime I come home from school, I go straight to sleep.. I know it's because I am heartbroken, when I arise, I get online, hoping to hear from the brotherhood here in the Forums. Negative or Positive responses, I need them all.
I keep worrying about my AFC side trying to call/contact her. I have this picture of us together, I had thoughts of taping it to her door with the phrase: "THE END?" attached to it. I come up with the craziest thoughts, but I don't intend to act on them. Man, getting over Andrea reminds me of a certain episode of Dragon Ball Z. I know why I am so affected by what she's does/ doing. I'm not IN love with her, I'm not even sure if it's LOVE period. But she has belittled my pride! I remember when I cheated on her 3 times in Oct-Nov, my pride felt restored (this was when I was in control of the relationship). I lost my control when I let my pride go for her, then she capitalized and used my feelings against me. I know that without my pride, I am nothing. So that's exactly how I feel now, but I feel like I have to do something to her to restore my pride again, and I know just the idea!
I won't see her again until March (she dropped out of school for the semester). In her absence, I will increase my self appearence into something beyond a 10. This will bother her because I have never done this while I was with her. She thinks she created me fashionably, and I give her the credit; which is more of the reason why I have to use it against her. I will try to look like the man she always wanted, this is her weakness. And I will not interact with her, as she is in disbelief from a distance. Yes, she will try to approach me and she will try to sucker me back in, but I will not fall for it, and I will have someone else. It would hurt to watch something you created function without you. She made me, now I'm gonna make history. She told me once that If I moved on and my next girlfriend were to look better than her (which she will), Andrea would try to ruin my relationship with her. We'll see.. but I will never go back to her again.. Why am I doing this? Because I want my revenge, I want the last laugh! AND I WILL HAVE IT!! It is the only way I'd feel comfortable with myself.