Accepting friendzone from select women

[Robert28]

If you have stuff in common, I don't see the issue. Sometimes(not as often as you think) you can meet women through them (not introduced but incidentally).

Yeah and they’ll sabatoge the fvck out of your chances if they pick up on any romance beginning. She will always listen to her friends over you.

 

[Robert28]

Or a female friend can tip you off about some chick in the social circle that likes you. The chick interested in you may have asked your friend about you; or your friend picked up some very subtle IOIs on her radar that you (as a guy) didn’t necessarily notice.

As women get older they are less likely to do any of that. They become super protective of you because you’ve become a resource to them, it’s not like when you’re both 16.

 

[Mike32ct]

As women get older they are less likely to do any of that. They become super protective of you because you’ve become a resource to them, it’s not like when you’re both 16.

Yeah, you’re right. I noticed that in recent years.

 

[2Rocky]

Guys, there are enough women out there, that you CAN be friends with some of them. Don't be desperate....

 

[bat soup]

I went through a stretch of limiting my personal interactions with women to romantic and sexual. Part of this was ditching Facebook a few years ago when it was getting ubertoxic. Recently I've been contemplating establishing female friends again, and they would be out of the pool of women I sexually pursued, as I almost always pursue women I like. Basically I'm looking at entering their friendzone orbiter cult for casual friendship.

I suppose the approach would be similar to a date but non sexual, like a lunch or public event. Has anyone had much success cultivating a decent circle of female friends on the side? Is it better to start from scratch?

I don't think that it's a good idea. If these are all women that you want to have sex with, then by being "friends" with them you're only going to start catching feelings for them again and then feeling frustrated when they repeatedly reject you.

 

[GreatHornedOwl]

Having tons of female friends is a huge benefit. You're seen with them, other women are wondering what you're situation is with them. You can use it to your advantage in so many different ways. It works even better if the girls don't know each other. And these women should be worried they're in the friendzone with you.

So most of you refuse to be friends with women? What is that doing for you? Are you showing up to bars and social events by yourself? Or with other dudes? That's not exactly what gets another woman's mind turning.

You need to be around women. Platonically or not. It helps you stay socially calibrated. It's like the kid who was always home schooled. He was never around the other kids and because of that has developed extremely poor social skills.

Look at what sparks the most jealousy in men. A woman with a lot of guy friends. Most know it's a huge red flag, but what happens? It's the girl most guys are hung up on. It works the same way for women. A guy who is always around girls has the same effect.

I really don't understand the way some of you think. I read a lot of these posts on this forum and just shake my head.

 

[Guy69JackBlue]

Having tons of female friends is a huge benefit. You're seen with them, other women are wondering what you're situation is with them. You can use it to your advantage in so many different ways. It works even better if the girls don't know each other. And these women should be worried they're in the friendzone with you.

So most of you refuse to be friends with women? What is that doing for you? Are you showing up to bars and social events by yourself? Or with other dudes? That's not exactly what gets another woman's mind turning.

You need to be around women. Platonically or not. It helps you stay socially calibrated. It's like the kid who was always home schooled. He was never around the other kids and because of that has developed extremely poor social skills.

Look at what sparks the most jealousy in men. A woman with a lot of guy friends. Most know it's a huge red flag, but what happens? It's the girl most guys are hung up on. It works the same way for women. A guy who is always around girls has the same effect.

I really don't understand the way some of you think. I read a lot of these posts on this forum and just shake my head.

But after you're "socially calibrated" you may realize you prefer solitude. Nobody is on your side except yourself. Most people are a complete waste of your time. (Like 99.99999% of all the people you'll ever encounter)

If other girls see you with a girl and you're just friends... They may wonder why.

And I believe a lot of these "women" you talk about are actually just young (stupid) girls.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

"select" means that you think they are of value or very attractive. It will not help you one bit as a friend unless they see you as an "attractive" male. That means they would fvck you or they think that you are attractive enough for their friends.

 

[Robert28]

Women friends are fine when you’re a teenager and in college. BUT once you become an adult, I don’t see the point in them. Especially in your 30’s and beyond.

 

[user252009]

Having tons of female friends is a huge benefit. You're seen with them, other women are wondering what you're situation is with them. You can use it to your advantage in so many different ways. It works even better if the girls don't know each other. And these women should be worried they're in the friendzone with you.

So most of you refuse to be friends with women? What is that doing for you? Are you showing up to bars and social events by yourself? Or with other dudes? That's not exactly what gets another woman's mind turning.

You need to be around women. Platonically or not. It helps you stay socially calibrated. It's like the kid who was always home schooled. He was never around the other kids and because of that has developed extremely poor social skills.

Look at what sparks the most jealousy in men. A woman with a lot of guy friends. Most know it's a huge red flag, but what happens? It's the girl most guys are hung up on. It works the same way for women. A guy who is always around girls has the same effect.

I really don't understand the way some of you think. I read a lot of these posts on this forum and just shake my head.

Or other women will think you're gay, because your girl friends act as friends with you

 

[Fruitbat]

All my fem friends are friends LTRs. Or some girls I hung out with in school. One girl from school actually we hung out a lot and both liked the other yet we never had the confidence (I guess I didn’t have the confidence) to ask.

she is now enormous so I dodged a bullet but she’s really nice and we chat on Facebook.
Women can be great friends. Rare - but possible .

Feb friends are ideal as there is no sexual thing given context. You can actually be a bit more real with them. However, I have other friends LTR who are a total risk. They see their man’s make friends as a threat to their devotion to them. One or two work very hard to stop you seeing each other - ESPECIALLY the feminists who can see you have a hint of red pill. They do not want their man having any male friends, because they are psychotic entitled narcissists.

The ability to have a friendship with a woman actually does help somewhat in understanding them. Men who had a lot of sisters tend to do well. You actually see what Makes them tick.

the dudes who don’t often had a brother,are into programming and these kind of things and have no idea how to relate to women.

one example was a dude I know who is very like this - no sister and very technically minded. Really wanted a family but said all relationships started well but after a bit the woman always turned a bit irrational and unreasonable.

I was like “er - yes, that’s a woman alright” - this is no big revelation to a man. He couldn’t tolerate it or understand it so he’s gone involuntary MGTOW.

women are emotional beings and any man who says that you can frame your way into not having your woman go a bit out of alignment is a Damn liar.

being around women more helps you understand it’s their issue, not yours. They will act weird but you just don’t react as much as you can, draw the boundary when they try to cross it, and just do this without being aggressive or escalating. It’s not hard. It’s just how you would treat a toddler really.

 

[GreatHornedOwl]

Or other women will think you're gay, because your girl friends act as friends with you

So if you happen to be around a female friend you're worried that people will think you're gay?

Are you that insecure dude?

Stop putting women on a pedestal. Just. Stop.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Or a female friend can tip you off about some chick in the social circle that likes you. The chick interested in you may have asked your friend about you; or your friend picked up some very subtle IOIs on her radar that you (as a guy) didn’t necessarily notice.

Alot of em don't like to do that. Because then she loses a orbiter.

 

[Robert28]

Alot of em don't like to do that. Because then she loses a orbiter.

Exactly. 99% of the time women friends ain’t gonna help you out at all. And the other 1% will help you out by setting you up with one of their most undateable friends. Think about it, she doesn’t want to date you but she stands to lose a great deal if someone else dates you.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Exactly. 99% of the time women friends ain’t gonna help you out at all. And the other 1% will help you out by setting you up with one of their most undateable friends. Think about it, she doesn’t want to date you but she stands to lose a great deal if someone else dates you.

Hence your no friends without benefits stance.

 

[Robert28]

Hence your no friends without benefits stance.

Yep. It gets me called all sorts of names when I draw that line in the sand but it helps me avoid the users and time wasters.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Exactly. 99% of the time women friends ain’t gonna help you out at all. And the other 1% will help you out by setting you up with one of their most undateable friends. Think about it, she doesn’t want to date you but she stands to lose a great deal if someone else dates you.

So she ain't really YOUR friend, but you are HER friend.

 

[Robert28]

So she ain't really YOUR friend, but you are HER friend.

People say I’m too rigid in my thinking when it comes to this stuff but I’m really not. I’m speaking as a man that’s been severely burned by this stuff over the years. Yeah a lot of it was my fault BUT I also eventually learned that it just doesn’t work. Befriending a woman that’s not dating one of your buddies is just asking for trouble. Women are the ultimate manipulators and to constantly have to be on your toes around them to guard against it is tiresome. It’s best to avoid it all together. I can’t think back to all the times I’ve done the friends thing and think of any specific time any good came from it. I don’t remember benefiting from the arrangement at all.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Exactly. 99% of the time women friends ain’t gonna help you out at all. And the other 1% will help you out by setting you up with one of their most undateable friends. Think about it, she doesn’t want to date you but she stands to lose a great deal if someone else dates you.

Right, to set you up with her most undateable friend to "prove" her point that you are not worthy. She would never "help" you unless it was helping herself more.

 

[Robert28]

Has this been your experience?

I’ve never had a woman friend try to set me up. They usually want to keep me to themselves and when I meet someone else, they don’t really get mad but you can see the frustration on their face “son of a b!tch he met someone, now who am I going to get to do stuff for me? Dammit all to hell!”.