Accepting friendzone from select women

[buddhafukko]

I went through a stretch of limiting my personal interactions with women to romantic and sexual. Part of this was ditching Facebook a few years ago when it was getting ubertoxic. Recently I've been contemplating establishing female friends again, and they would be out of the pool of women I sexually pursued, as I almost always pursue women I like. Basically I'm looking at entering their friendzone orbiter cult for casual friendship.

I suppose the approach would be similar to a date but non sexual, like a lunch or public event. Has anyone had much success cultivating a decent circle of female friends on the side? Is it better to start from scratch?

 

[Bingo-Player]

Friends is not a word i would want to associate with too many women , if your not careful you can quickly build a "gay best friend" image for yourself

Acquainting women is fine , fully befriending them I'm not so sure

 

[ThisIsSparta]

Basically I'm looking at entering their friendzone orbiter cult for casual friendship.

So you want to become a simp..... why would you do such a thing?

Women are only needed for 2 things, sex and kids

While a solid stock of acquainted, good looking women on your social media to imply dread game when needed is beneficial,
for everything else you have family, male friends and pets.

 

[SW15]

I'll start by saying that I have no female friends. In the 20+ years since I was in high school and started developing sexual interest in women, I've had no female friends that I found sexually attractive and few total female friends.

I'm not opposed to having female friends. There are a few good but rare situations when female friends are beneficial.

1. It's possible to be friends with the girlfriends/wives of your male friends. They might be useful in introducing you to potential dates. This happens less frequently than it did 30 years ago but it is still possible.
2. Outside of your primary male friend group, a woman who is married or in a very stable LTR might be a worthwhile friend if you think her social circle is good enough to introduce you to potential dates. This hypothetical woman could be a female co-worker in a white collar setting. White collar work discourages sexual interactions in the workplace. This is an unusual situation but could be worth exploring. Keep in mind that most people have weaker social circles now and a lot of married people don't know single and unattached people all too well.

 

[Glassguy]

I actually do have a limited number of female friends. They are all former plates that I currently have no desire hanging out with anymore. They could potentially be orbiters as well, but they have great personalities and are actually fun to hang out with on occasion.

It definitely the exception and not the norm.

The rule of thumb is this- If you are sexually pursuing a woman, you cant be friends with her. If a woman is sexually pursuing you and you are not interested in her sexually, you can be friends with her.

 

[2Rocky]

Female friends can be quite valuable and will often be good wing-girls. They also do tend to provide a little covert dread for your LTR's as well. My female friends are women I did not deem worthy of sexual pursuit but enrich my life in other ways. One was a woman I met while married. At the time of my divorce I had to slot her in the friendzone...

Another is a college professor I worked with in her previous job. While she is single, she doesn't make my putter flutter, but she is friendly and likes a number of the same hobbies as I . I encouraged my LTR to befriend her.

Others are buddies wives. Non targets because of association. Others are out of my age range.

But exe's are not ever friends or allowed to orbit. it's just easier that way....

 

[Mike32ct]

I like having some female friends. The best part is that there is zero pressure. I can be myself, and she pays her own way.

 

[Kotaix]

I have a few very good female friends that I don't pursue sexually. They are extremely loyal and regularly establish contact with me of their own accord, moreso than most men. I don't date them because either, they're taken, they live far away or because I can only put up with them in short doses.

Orbiting is different from friendship. Orbiters are vultures who will overlook bad behaviour if it means they get to get their d!ck wet. Friends respect eachother naturally.

 

[GreatHornedOwl]

This "friendzone" thing has to stop. There is nothing wrong with being "friends" with a woman. Most of you are so socially uncalibrated you don't understand this is the basis for how a woman's attraction starts.

If she turns you down, it's not because you're her friend. It's because she's not interested in you. Period. That's it. Next discussion...

 

[derby1]

your either the better looking one of the two, and banging,

or your uglier than her, and now youre her little "Time wh0re"

 

[SirBigBell]

I would only ever consider being friends with a woman as a strategic move to have access to her sexy friends.

A lady friend I was at primary school with used to hook me up with her pals. I put about 6 notches on my bedpost, thanks to her facilitation.

If a woman says to another woman “hey this dude is my old buddy from school, he is a good guy” thats 75% of the battle won. A woman’s endorsement is super powerful

 

[BadBoy89]

Personally I think any man who is friends* with a female wants to f her. There is some attraction there, otherwise a man wouldn’t waste his time.

I would super surprised if anyone here had female *friends* who were in their mid to late 30s or older, with a child, and some what overweight. A man is going to spend his Saturday afternoon going for coffee with her to shoot the breeze?

Come on.

 

[user252009]

Don't be friends with women, won't serve you anything except blueballs, will only serve them.

 

[Alvafe]

you are only "friends" with ugly woman, because you know then enough to not even want to tap that so don't matter what she do, it never affect you, and you use her as a proxy to get close to her friends.

end game too many people use the word friend, but they are not really friends, colleagues and acquaintances explain better. so you should never accept friendzone, you should be too busy to even waste time for that

 

[Lookatu]

I would only ever consider being friends with a woman as a strategic move to have access to her sexy friends.

This.

Female friends for networking purposes or if they can serve some other purpose for YOU.

 

[Mike32ct]

It’s ok if you know what you are doing.

I have one long time female friend, and there is zero attraction on either side. She’s my “sister” of sorts. It’s fine.

I have another more recent female friend that is attractive but doesn’t see me that way. We talk and hang out sometimes. I don’t “simp” or “orbit.” I know the deal but enjoy the company. It works.

 

[Robert28]

I like having some female friends. The best part is that there is zero pressure. I can be myself, and she pays her own way.

Pays her way? You my friend have found a unicorn.

 

[Robert28]

I live by a simple rule that’s helped me after being burned a couple times by female “friends” or friendzone or whatever you want to call it. The rule is if we ain’t fvcking we ain’t anything. If you want to be just my friend and do friend things you better give it up. Sounds harsh but it saved me a ton of trouble. You want to be friends, fine, we can be friends with benefits.

 

[Mike32ct]

Pays her way? You my friend have found a unicorn.

Absolutely. Yeah the attractive one is a cool chick who pays her own way. She’s never asked me for a dollar.

But I totally understand guys that avoid female friends because there are also a lot of users out there.

 

[Mike32ct]

If you have stuff in common, I don't see the issue. Sometimes(not as often as you think) you can meet women through them (not introduced but incidentally).

Or a female friend can tip you off about some chick in the social circle that likes you. The chick interested in you may have asked your friend about you; or your friend picked up some very subtle IOIs on her radar that you (as a guy) didn’t necessarily notice.