Purefilth
Master Don Juan
He's right, I know from experience, breaking that rule found me this site though soo in a way it was a good thing...TillTheEndOfTime said:
AAAgent's Approach journal
- Thread starter AAAgent
- Start date
-
- Tags
- approach anxiety dating
Yeah, that was 3 years ago right after a break-up that left me devastated. I was trying things out and that obviously wasn't the right move but i still got her anyway. Learned a lot about handling women since then.
I'm on week 3 of the DJ bootcamp now trying to work on approaching women and holding conversations.
I do fairly well not approaching women. If i hang out with my social circle and new girls come either from my guy friends or girl friends, i'll always get some play. What i really need work on is actually approaching the girls and showing my intentions. I get nervous or overly aggressive and it rarely turns out well.
I've realized that when women open me, im always really closed, calm and reserved most of the time. I think it's because i'm uptight due to the lack of enjoying life presently. Without much time to really relax, all i really do is read, study for gmat, go to the gym and work 50-60 hours a week. I don't really do anything for leisure so when i have conversations it's really hard for me to have a real interesting conversations. When i was traveling the world and doing archaeology, going to countries where i didn't speak the language and seeing all this stuff i had so much to talk about. Maybe it's just because i'm currently boring. Just a few more months of studying before i take the exam.
As i don't do well winging things, i'm going to write out my approach strategy. I will list my list of approaches and the possible responses. Generally how you break through the resistance during the opener is the hardest part. If you do it well, it will be alot easier to maintain a conversation.
Venues where i normally try to have conversations are Bookstore, mall, and the park.
--------
Bookstore:
If I can make eye contact, move on to smiling confidently and then directly open with below. If not walk next to them and face them and say:
AAA: Hi, (brief pause for her attention) can I get your opinion on something?
No/i'm actually busy/*****y stare & ignores me-- AAA: Okay, have a good one. (Next and is clearly not interested)
yes/ Sure/ etc.
AAA: I'm looking to get a book for my niece, but she doesn't really like anything I read. Do you have any suggestions?
not really, etc. AAA: alright, thanks though.
What does she like to read? AAA: romance and comedy (hear her opinions etc. thank her for her suggestions then introduce myself.) My name is AAA (should i do full name?). What's your name?
AAA: Nice to meet you HB (shake hand). So are you from the area? (if so, "wow, so what's it like to grow up in nyc? " (Relate to her that i grew up in a city too)", just moved here or here for school "oh really? I heard xyz school has a good business program. What are you studying there? (relate to that too)" here for work "Oh really? So, what do you do?" finish this banter
AAA: Anything exciting going on this weekend?
AAA: (Whatever she responds) Well if you want to have an awesome weekend let me know.
AAA: Well it was great meeting you HB, and thanks for the suggestions. Let me get your number.
I'm on week 3 of the DJ bootcamp now trying to work on approaching women and holding conversations.
I do fairly well not approaching women. If i hang out with my social circle and new girls come either from my guy friends or girl friends, i'll always get some play. What i really need work on is actually approaching the girls and showing my intentions. I get nervous or overly aggressive and it rarely turns out well.
I've realized that when women open me, im always really closed, calm and reserved most of the time. I think it's because i'm uptight due to the lack of enjoying life presently. Without much time to really relax, all i really do is read, study for gmat, go to the gym and work 50-60 hours a week. I don't really do anything for leisure so when i have conversations it's really hard for me to have a real interesting conversations. When i was traveling the world and doing archaeology, going to countries where i didn't speak the language and seeing all this stuff i had so much to talk about. Maybe it's just because i'm currently boring. Just a few more months of studying before i take the exam.
As i don't do well winging things, i'm going to write out my approach strategy. I will list my list of approaches and the possible responses. Generally how you break through the resistance during the opener is the hardest part. If you do it well, it will be alot easier to maintain a conversation.
Venues where i normally try to have conversations are Bookstore, mall, and the park.
--------
Bookstore:
If I can make eye contact, move on to smiling confidently and then directly open with below. If not walk next to them and face them and say:
AAA: Hi, (brief pause for her attention) can I get your opinion on something?
No/i'm actually busy/*****y stare & ignores me-- AAA: Okay, have a good one. (Next and is clearly not interested)
yes/ Sure/ etc.
AAA: I'm looking to get a book for my niece, but she doesn't really like anything I read. Do you have any suggestions?
not really, etc. AAA: alright, thanks though.
What does she like to read? AAA: romance and comedy (hear her opinions etc. thank her for her suggestions then introduce myself.) My name is AAA (should i do full name?). What's your name?
AAA: Nice to meet you HB (shake hand). So are you from the area? (if so, "wow, so what's it like to grow up in nyc? " (Relate to her that i grew up in a city too)", just moved here or here for school "oh really? I heard xyz school has a good business program. What are you studying there? (relate to that too)" here for work "Oh really? So, what do you do?" finish this banter
AAA: Anything exciting going on this weekend?
AAA: (Whatever she responds) Well if you want to have an awesome weekend let me know.
AAA: Well it was great meeting you HB, and thanks for the suggestions. Let me get your number.
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Went to the company party last night and i got pretty hammered.
I got ****blocked by this girl at work who used to really dig me. We have a trip coming up in august to go to either vermont or maine. Not sure what's happening there. Anyway, my friend/coworker is talking to this girl that he works with, i've never seen her before and she's kind of cute so i figure it'd be great to practice my approach on her for week 3's task.
AAA: Hey!
HB7: Hi!
AAA: So are you a journalist?
HB7: Yeah.
AAA: I feel like I haven't seen you around before, are you new to company name?
hb7: yeah i am, i actually just started 4 days ago but i'm actually based in boston. I'm just here for training.
AAA: oh, that's cool. how long are you staying for?
hb7: I'm here till the end of next week.
AAA: So what sectors do you cover? (elevator comes. some of us are heading downstairs due to the downpour).
hb7: (just me and her enter the elevator) I'm actually regional, so i'll cover the boston and whole northeast region.
AAA: Oh okay. I'm AAA btw.
HB7: im adfjhaldja (i had no clue what she said).
Small talk some more as we're walking to the hotel lobby.
AAA: I'm sorry, what was your name again, i didn't really catch it the first time.
hb7: Oh sure. It's Arielle.
AAA: ok. What's your last name?
hb7: hb7. What's your's
AAA: AAA
We small talk some more here and there about what she studied and where she went to school (she kept it under wraps) until armenin c0ckblock girl comes and hijacks my convo. then she brings in this random weird IT guy into the convo.
Eventually i just casually eject as i wasn't super interested. I look her up this morning on linkedin and apparently she is a harvard grad who studied journalism....damn.
--
Second girl my direct co-worker just grabbed me and said, "Hey, have you met Melicia?" Basically just talked to her for a bit. She's alright and has a nice body. Don't really remember the conversation.
--
Lastly, i was pretty drunk on my way back home and i went to another fortune teller. I was wearing board shorts for our summer party. This is the 3rd fortune teller over the span of over a year, in another state(3 fortune tellers in 3 different states), and she told me the same exact fortune as the other 2.....
WTF, i must have this sh1t written on my face as i don't believe in fortune tellers.
----
On a side note, i texted a chick(korean) i used to talk to who I was supposed to meet up with a few months ago. She's going to Cornell getting her PhD in Economics finishing her first out of 5 years.
I'm texting her at 11pm.
AAA: How's Dr. HB coming along?
HBK: Hahaha I have a far way ahead of me before being a real Dr
I'm alright. How have u been???
AAA: Good good. Your a Doc in my eyes. Been busy with work n studying. When are you coming to NYC again?
HBK: Sometime during the first week of August! My exam will be over by then
AAA: Okay! Let me know the date and we'll def meet up this time. Gl hf!! (gl hf means good luck have fun. if you play starcraft, which she does, you'll understand)
HBK: For sure! Good night!!!
AAA: G nite
I got ****blocked by this girl at work who used to really dig me. We have a trip coming up in august to go to either vermont or maine. Not sure what's happening there. Anyway, my friend/coworker is talking to this girl that he works with, i've never seen her before and she's kind of cute so i figure it'd be great to practice my approach on her for week 3's task.
AAA: Hey!
HB7: Hi!
AAA: So are you a journalist?
HB7: Yeah.
AAA: I feel like I haven't seen you around before, are you new to company name?
hb7: yeah i am, i actually just started 4 days ago but i'm actually based in boston. I'm just here for training.
AAA: oh, that's cool. how long are you staying for?
hb7: I'm here till the end of next week.
AAA: So what sectors do you cover? (elevator comes. some of us are heading downstairs due to the downpour).
hb7: (just me and her enter the elevator) I'm actually regional, so i'll cover the boston and whole northeast region.
AAA: Oh okay. I'm AAA btw.
HB7: im adfjhaldja (i had no clue what she said).
Small talk some more as we're walking to the hotel lobby.
AAA: I'm sorry, what was your name again, i didn't really catch it the first time.
hb7: Oh sure. It's Arielle.
AAA: ok. What's your last name?
hb7: hb7. What's your's
AAA: AAA
We small talk some more here and there about what she studied and where she went to school (she kept it under wraps) until armenin c0ckblock girl comes and hijacks my convo. then she brings in this random weird IT guy into the convo.
Eventually i just casually eject as i wasn't super interested. I look her up this morning on linkedin and apparently she is a harvard grad who studied journalism....damn.
--
Second girl my direct co-worker just grabbed me and said, "Hey, have you met Melicia?" Basically just talked to her for a bit. She's alright and has a nice body. Don't really remember the conversation.
--
Lastly, i was pretty drunk on my way back home and i went to another fortune teller. I was wearing board shorts for our summer party. This is the 3rd fortune teller over the span of over a year, in another state(3 fortune tellers in 3 different states), and she told me the same exact fortune as the other 2.....
WTF, i must have this sh1t written on my face as i don't believe in fortune tellers.
----
On a side note, i texted a chick(korean) i used to talk to who I was supposed to meet up with a few months ago. She's going to Cornell getting her PhD in Economics finishing her first out of 5 years.
I'm texting her at 11pm.
AAA: How's Dr. HB coming along?
HBK: Hahaha I have a far way ahead of me before being a real Dr
I'm alright. How have u been???AAA: Good good. Your a Doc in my eyes. Been busy with work n studying. When are you coming to NYC again?
HBK: Sometime during the first week of August! My exam will be over by then
AAA: Okay! Let me know the date and we'll def meet up this time. Gl hf!! (gl hf means good luck have fun. if you play starcraft, which she does, you'll understand)
HBK: For sure! Good night!!!
AAA: G nite
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Had a busy week last week as my global boss was in town and we had to plan meetings with our clients for him, we had team drinks that went until 1am and we also had a company party.
1.) Went to the gym 3 times last week.
2.) Read for 1,001 Arabian Nights & the Tao Te ching.
3.) did not do any questions do to my schedule.
4.) talked to a new journalist at my company who is going to be working from boston. She went to harvard.
5.) I waited for a couple with a stroller and held the door for them. Not the greatest deed but its better than nothing.
6.) I actually just stopped trying to get everyone to like me and its been turning out pretty well. Most of my team is slowly getting along with me now. Normally when we do team drinks I try hard to fit in and join in on conversations (they hired us because we're attractive and we are great conversationalist/public speakers so that we can build relationships with our clients) but this time i just chit chatted here and there and then just chilled out at the bar. People kept pulling em back into the group and i talked to them but then kept to myself after. I'm honestly just tired of putting on a front. This may hurt me but who knows, i figured people will enjoy my company more for being me than not being me. I still fully socialize when we have client parties but this isn't one of those.
8.) Honestly, i don't feel fully ready to talk to women yet. I'm not emotionally stable, financially stable, and even now place i'm living at doesn't allow sleep overs. (i live with 3 girls and one of them said no sleep overs). But then i saw this old asian lady and her young grand daughter (late teens to 20's) picking through trash and collecting bags and bags of bottles for recycling. Then i just feel ashamed for trying to chase tail and i feel more ashamed for being scared to chase tail when theres people like them just working hard to survive.
In the end, i've come to the conclusion that i'm a great person because i have compassion and work hard to improve myself. Sure i may not always succeed, but the important thing is that i don't give up and keep trying. Those two lady's picking through the trash collected over 20 bags of bottles and i saw them over a year ago and they haven't given up so how can I?
9.) haven't fapped in over 17 days. My record is 21 (set over 10 years ago) and i think i'm going to break it.
----------
DJ bootcamp week 3 looks to be a fail. I only got 2 conversations with random girls both during my company party on booze.
1.) Went to the gym 3 times last week.
2.) Read for 1,001 Arabian Nights & the Tao Te ching.
3.) did not do any questions do to my schedule.
4.) talked to a new journalist at my company who is going to be working from boston. She went to harvard.
5.) I waited for a couple with a stroller and held the door for them. Not the greatest deed but its better than nothing.
6.) I actually just stopped trying to get everyone to like me and its been turning out pretty well. Most of my team is slowly getting along with me now. Normally when we do team drinks I try hard to fit in and join in on conversations (they hired us because we're attractive and we are great conversationalist/public speakers so that we can build relationships with our clients) but this time i just chit chatted here and there and then just chilled out at the bar. People kept pulling em back into the group and i talked to them but then kept to myself after. I'm honestly just tired of putting on a front. This may hurt me but who knows, i figured people will enjoy my company more for being me than not being me. I still fully socialize when we have client parties but this isn't one of those.
8.) Honestly, i don't feel fully ready to talk to women yet. I'm not emotionally stable, financially stable, and even now place i'm living at doesn't allow sleep overs. (i live with 3 girls and one of them said no sleep overs). But then i saw this old asian lady and her young grand daughter (late teens to 20's) picking through trash and collecting bags and bags of bottles for recycling. Then i just feel ashamed for trying to chase tail and i feel more ashamed for being scared to chase tail when theres people like them just working hard to survive.
In the end, i've come to the conclusion that i'm a great person because i have compassion and work hard to improve myself. Sure i may not always succeed, but the important thing is that i don't give up and keep trying. Those two lady's picking through the trash collected over 20 bags of bottles and i saw them over a year ago and they haven't given up so how can I?
9.) haven't fapped in over 17 days. My record is 21 (set over 10 years ago) and i think i'm going to break it.
----------
DJ bootcamp week 3 looks to be a fail. I only got 2 conversations with random girls both during my company party on booze.
Well my co-worker/friends sister who has a crush on me randomly asked me to take a trip with her and i said okay. I'm just down to do fun random things.
HBA(armenian): AAA!
AAA: hey
HBA: how are you
AAA: im good. you?
AAA:you sound excited. whats up?
hba: haha not really. was gonna ask if you had any fun trips lined up. cuz i dont
AAA: haha. london possibly. not sure if its classified as fun
whole bunch small talk
AAA: but i'm definitely down for an awesome adventure
AAA: maybe we can plan one?
hba: yeeeesss
hba: I would love that
hba:
hba: do you have a car, because the problem is i don't
AAA: haha i do. what did you have in mind?
hba: lets drive somewhere
more small talk about deciding where and we end up deciding maine or vermont during august. day ends there and i follow up a 2 weeks later today
AAA:hey
AAA: just wanted to figure out what our plans were, since i need to take my days off a couple of weeks before.
hba: AAA! how about we go somewhere closeish so we don't need to take days off. I think i want to pull them all together and go to europe.
AAA: i thought we were going close? what did you have in mind?
hba: how about like
hba: phillyy
AAA: haha, what happened to our adventure.
then she asked about lake george and montauk
AAA: ahh that's boring
hba: awww
eventually we decide on vermont and she ask's to go this weekend. No clue how this is going to turn out, normally the girls always make the moves....she's definitely into me. last year she took me out to lunch to her friends restaurant and her friend hooked us up with ice cream like it was a date.....i rejected her a week later (we didn't do anything). she's a cool girl but i'm not into her or anything. Probably like a 6.5.
any suggestions guys?
HBA(armenian): AAA!
AAA: hey
HBA: how are you
AAA: im good. you?
AAA:you sound excited. whats up?
hba: haha not really. was gonna ask if you had any fun trips lined up. cuz i dont
AAA: haha. london possibly. not sure if its classified as fun
whole bunch small talk
AAA: but i'm definitely down for an awesome adventure
AAA: maybe we can plan one?
hba: yeeeesss
hba: I would love that
hba:
hba: do you have a car, because the problem is i don't
AAA: haha i do. what did you have in mind?
hba: lets drive somewhere
more small talk about deciding where and we end up deciding maine or vermont during august. day ends there and i follow up a 2 weeks later today
AAA:hey
AAA: just wanted to figure out what our plans were, since i need to take my days off a couple of weeks before.
hba: AAA! how about we go somewhere closeish so we don't need to take days off. I think i want to pull them all together and go to europe.
AAA: i thought we were going close? what did you have in mind?
hba: how about like
hba: phillyy
AAA: haha, what happened to our adventure.
then she asked about lake george and montauk
AAA: ahh that's boring
hba: awww
eventually we decide on vermont and she ask's to go this weekend. No clue how this is going to turn out, normally the girls always make the moves....she's definitely into me. last year she took me out to lunch to her friends restaurant and her friend hooked us up with ice cream like it was a date.....i rejected her a week later (we didn't do anything). she's a cool girl but i'm not into her or anything. Probably like a 6.5.
any suggestions guys?
I really don't care about the lay, i just want to go somewhere fun and make good memories for myself. I'm not going to run my life around chasing tail.
However, going 17 days of no fap....honestly....I want to fvck everything right now and getting laid is pretty important, but i still won't compromise what i want to do for a quick lay as it would defeat the purpose of bettering myself.
Any idea's what to do in vermont? I kinda want to let her plan it but i don't know if that's beta. I honestly have no idea what's in vermont i just want to go to a new place and experience new things.
However, going 17 days of no fap....honestly....I want to fvck everything right now and getting laid is pretty important, but i still won't compromise what i want to do for a quick lay as it would defeat the purpose of bettering myself.
Any idea's what to do in vermont? I kinda want to let her plan it but i don't know if that's beta. I honestly have no idea what's in vermont i just want to go to a new place and experience new things.
You know what? It might not be a bad idea to f&ck this girl. Just be sure she knows that you don't want anything long term right now and just f&xk her the entire trip. Get it out of your system that sex is a big deal. Don't hurt the girl though...
well it seems like she's backing out. Not a major let down, but we'll see if it changes.
This is only chance she'll have with me so i hope she doesn't blow it. She did make me take 2 vacation days after all (2 free days i got that need to be used in august). I used this day to run all my errands, so its not too bad.
This girl always tries to talk to me and hang out with me but i always keep it short and then i invite her to a weekend getaway and this is what happens. I was expecting a flake too but also excited for taking a random trip.
This is only chance she'll have with me so i hope she doesn't blow it. She did make me take 2 vacation days after all (2 free days i got that need to be used in august). I used this day to run all my errands, so its not too bad.
This girl always tries to talk to me and hang out with me but i always keep it short and then i invite her to a weekend getaway and this is what happens. I was expecting a flake too but also excited for taking a random trip.
well as expected, she backed out for good.
I met up with the Chosenone and he was exactly what his journal sounds like. Ballsy. It was way more than i expected as i'm still trying to break out of my shell for approaching.
He approached 15 girls including singles and groups the few hours we were together and got 3 numbers. As i was walking home some cute hb7 stops me to talk about donating to children in poverty. I agree to do this and at the end of the convo i figure i might as well as for her number after watching chosenone ask 15 girls for theirs.
we were talking for about 10 mins about the children in poverty and she also kept asking me personal questions and i reciprocated. towards the end right before i was about to leave
AAA: thanks for helping me do this today (was being honest as i haven't done anything substantial for good deeds lately). Let me get your number, so if it turns out well i can take you to lunch.
HB7: sure. (inputs number in my phone, i dial the number so its saved and she has my number. She didn't know i dialed it.) Don't forget my name!
AAA: thanks hb7, have a great day.
HB7: you too AAA.
5 minutes later as i'm walking away, she calls me back which i find weird. I thought maybe i forget to sign some stuff. But she apparently didn't know i dialed her number and just wanted to confirm (i think this was just some gimmick so she could confirm she had my number.).
She's 20 and goes to school in massachusetts so i know i don't have much time.
We met on saturday so i call her on sunday afternoon telling her i'm going to be around and wanted to see if she was free to grab something to eat.
I call around 1pm and she didn't answer but i get a text an hour later....
HB7: Hi who is this?
I'm thinking to myself....we basically exchanged numbers yesterday as she called my phone. This must be a game she's playing.
Text back 20 mins later with this response.
AAA: Hey HB7, it's AAA. Thanks again for yesterday.
AAA: I'm going to be in the city later today. Are you free to grab a bite to eat?
15 mins later
HB7: Oh hi. Your welcome! I'm actually in Connecticut until tomorrow. Maybe next time?
10 mins later
AAA: Sure. Have fun in connecticut.
--------------
Anyways, don't really have a good vibe on this one. I will either call tomorrow night or send a text asking her out again.
I met up with the Chosenone and he was exactly what his journal sounds like. Ballsy. It was way more than i expected as i'm still trying to break out of my shell for approaching.
He approached 15 girls including singles and groups the few hours we were together and got 3 numbers. As i was walking home some cute hb7 stops me to talk about donating to children in poverty. I agree to do this and at the end of the convo i figure i might as well as for her number after watching chosenone ask 15 girls for theirs.
we were talking for about 10 mins about the children in poverty and she also kept asking me personal questions and i reciprocated. towards the end right before i was about to leave
AAA: thanks for helping me do this today (was being honest as i haven't done anything substantial for good deeds lately). Let me get your number, so if it turns out well i can take you to lunch.
HB7: sure. (inputs number in my phone, i dial the number so its saved and she has my number. She didn't know i dialed it.) Don't forget my name!
AAA: thanks hb7, have a great day.
HB7: you too AAA.
5 minutes later as i'm walking away, she calls me back which i find weird. I thought maybe i forget to sign some stuff. But she apparently didn't know i dialed her number and just wanted to confirm (i think this was just some gimmick so she could confirm she had my number.).
She's 20 and goes to school in massachusetts so i know i don't have much time.
We met on saturday so i call her on sunday afternoon telling her i'm going to be around and wanted to see if she was free to grab something to eat.
I call around 1pm and she didn't answer but i get a text an hour later....
HB7: Hi who is this?
I'm thinking to myself....we basically exchanged numbers yesterday as she called my phone. This must be a game she's playing.
Text back 20 mins later with this response.
AAA: Hey HB7, it's AAA. Thanks again for yesterday.
AAA: I'm going to be in the city later today. Are you free to grab a bite to eat?
15 mins later
HB7: Oh hi. Your welcome! I'm actually in Connecticut until tomorrow. Maybe next time?
10 mins later
AAA: Sure. Have fun in connecticut.
--------------
Anyways, don't really have a good vibe on this one. I will either call tomorrow night or send a text asking her out again.
Damn.... I have no clue why i always get zoo nervous...
It must be because i haven't had a date with a complete stranger for the longest time. It's always been social circle, etc.
Took me a good 1.5 hours of pondering what to say and what not and i finally manned up and made the call at 9:45pm as i was running out of time before it literally got too late and would have been weird.
I generally always all for a first date, especially if it's a stranger. Text is just such a cope out.
AAA: Hey HB7.5 (wait for her response)
hb7.5: ........hey..Hey AAA!
AAA: How's everything been, your weekend and all?
hb7.5: oh it was good. blah blah
AAA: sounds like you had fun. So what'd you guys end up doing in connecticut?
hb7.5: we watched a movie.
AAA: All the way in connecticut?!?!
hb7.5: haha yeah.
AAA: what'd you end up seeing?
hb7.5: adklfkljdd
AAA: what was that?
hb7.5: we saw the dark knight.
AAA: Oh! How'd you like it?
hb7.5: Oh it was okay....I liked the 2nd and 1st one better.
AAA: ooh, yeah i like this one. Especially bane. he was pretty cool.
AAA: So..I'm planning on getting dinner this weekend. Are you free?
hb7.5: umm......yeah when
AAA: How's saturday, at 7:30.
hb7.5: well i work on saturday but...yeah.
AAA: great.
hb7.5: i'll call you on friday (you'll probably text or sh1t test me with a flake)
AAA: sure (i should have taken the lead and said i'd call her...bleh)
AAA: okay, see you then. bye
hb7.5: yeah, see you then. Have a good night.
AAA: You too. bye
hb7.5: bye.
Not my greatest of conversations...i'd give it a 7/10. but oh well.
Got the job done.
It must be because i haven't had a date with a complete stranger for the longest time. It's always been social circle, etc.
Took me a good 1.5 hours of pondering what to say and what not and i finally manned up and made the call at 9:45pm as i was running out of time before it literally got too late and would have been weird.
I generally always all for a first date, especially if it's a stranger. Text is just such a cope out.
AAA: Hey HB7.5 (wait for her response)
hb7.5: ........hey..Hey AAA!
AAA: How's everything been, your weekend and all?
hb7.5: oh it was good. blah blah
AAA: sounds like you had fun. So what'd you guys end up doing in connecticut?
hb7.5: we watched a movie.
AAA: All the way in connecticut?!?!
hb7.5: haha yeah.
AAA: what'd you end up seeing?
hb7.5: adklfkljdd
AAA: what was that?
hb7.5: we saw the dark knight.
AAA: Oh! How'd you like it?
hb7.5: Oh it was okay....I liked the 2nd and 1st one better.
AAA: ooh, yeah i like this one. Especially bane. he was pretty cool.
AAA: So..I'm planning on getting dinner this weekend. Are you free?
hb7.5: umm......yeah when
AAA: How's saturday, at 7:30.
hb7.5: well i work on saturday but...yeah.
AAA: great.
hb7.5: i'll call you on friday (you'll probably text or sh1t test me with a flake)
AAA: sure (i should have taken the lead and said i'd call her...bleh)
AAA: okay, see you then. bye
hb7.5: yeah, see you then. Have a good night.
AAA: You too. bye
hb7.5: bye.
Not my greatest of conversations...i'd give it a 7/10. but oh well.
Got the job done.
Since i thought it was weird to have her take control to contact me on Friday (today) i decided to text her yesterday at 6pm. I got no response back which i was a bit surprised, but preventing girls from flaking is pretty tough in general.
You can't be weird, needy or too pushy but you should still take control and lead the situation. Hope this one doesn't flake but we'll see. I may give her a call tonight around 8pm to see what's going on. I don't think it's too much given she didn't respond.
Text last night at 5:40pm
AAA: Hey HB7.5. What type of foods do you like?
no response
Been having a pretty crazy week.
You can't be weird, needy or too pushy but you should still take control and lead the situation. Hope this one doesn't flake but we'll see. I may give her a call tonight around 8pm to see what's going on. I don't think it's too much given she didn't respond.
Text last night at 5:40pm
AAA: Hey HB7.5. What type of foods do you like?
no response
Been having a pretty crazy week.
Another flake.
HB7.5 never followed up with me on friday, so on saturday i sent her a text saying
AAA: Hey, i got reservations at xyz restaurant on 13th and university. Let me know if tonight is still good for you.
No response. I thought it was really weird as everything seemed okay, and i thought that i would at least warrant a "sorry i can't make it." but no reply.
Just goes to show, even if you play it right sometimes flakes will happen for no reason.
Ended up going out for a friends bday and spent way more than i expected. knew everyone there except for this one girl who i've met before but never really talked to. She didn't make an effort to talk to me but didn't ignore me. I find that alot of girls are afraid of striking up a conversation with me but they find me really attractive and always stare at me. I was buying a friend of mine drinks but she dissapeared so i walked up to the girl and asked her where her drink was and basically gave her the extra drink i had. We started talking and eventually her lips and face were so close to mine i accidentally kissed her cheek. We just kept talking and she was asking if i'd be her new room mate and i just asked her straight out to give me her number.
She's an hb6. She called me this morning but i missed it and returned her call. Not sure why's she's calling but i don't really care. The birthday girl was getting talked down to by some guy so i stood up for her and was about to drop the guy as he was talking sh1t...but my friends came in and i just calmed down. The guys girl wanted to start sh1t too and said "she'd fvck me up." and i just laughed in her face and said "No you won't." and turned my back to her...she got really pissed.
Birthday girl is now texting me to hang out....could be a friendly thing but who knows......
once again, my working my social circle is not a problem.....talking to girls who i have no connection to seems to be the problem still.
HB7.5 never followed up with me on friday, so on saturday i sent her a text saying
AAA: Hey, i got reservations at xyz restaurant on 13th and university. Let me know if tonight is still good for you.
No response. I thought it was really weird as everything seemed okay, and i thought that i would at least warrant a "sorry i can't make it." but no reply.
Just goes to show, even if you play it right sometimes flakes will happen for no reason.
Ended up going out for a friends bday and spent way more than i expected. knew everyone there except for this one girl who i've met before but never really talked to. She didn't make an effort to talk to me but didn't ignore me. I find that alot of girls are afraid of striking up a conversation with me but they find me really attractive and always stare at me. I was buying a friend of mine drinks but she dissapeared so i walked up to the girl and asked her where her drink was and basically gave her the extra drink i had. We started talking and eventually her lips and face were so close to mine i accidentally kissed her cheek. We just kept talking and she was asking if i'd be her new room mate and i just asked her straight out to give me her number.
She's an hb6. She called me this morning but i missed it and returned her call. Not sure why's she's calling but i don't really care. The birthday girl was getting talked down to by some guy so i stood up for her and was about to drop the guy as he was talking sh1t...but my friends came in and i just calmed down. The guys girl wanted to start sh1t too and said "she'd fvck me up." and i just laughed in her face and said "No you won't." and turned my back to her...she got really pissed.
Birthday girl is now texting me to hang out....could be a friendly thing but who knows......
once again, my working my social circle is not a problem.....talking to girls who i have no connection to seems to be the problem still.
Yeah, i normally have flakes because of something stupid i did. I used to have no understanding of how to date/talk to women i was interested in so i used to always scare all girls who were interested in me or that i got to agree to a date. After much tutelage and experience that doesn't happen much anymore and this was the first time it happened when i didn't make any dramatic errors. Sh1t happens.
----
Took the girl that i met at the club out. I wasn't too interested in her so i just straight up sent her a text to grab drinks which she agreed. I asked her at 3pm and she got back at 5pm and at 7pm we got drinks. We got along great and she's actually way better than i expected. She's a bit plain but doesn't repulse me when i talk to her which happens alot with alot of dumb ho3s or ditzy girls. She did like 80% of the talking just about moving, work, etc. and i just answered her questions and asked her more without telling her anything about myself.
Weird thing was she literally asked me nothing about me.....not sure if its because she already knows from her friends or what not but i found that strange, a small turn off or a sign of disinterest. All she asked about in our 2 hours of drinking together was where i was from, what highschool i went to, and what i do now. She also asked about why that girl and guy couple wanted to fight me the other night, which i just said they basically tried to gang up on the bday girl and i wasn't having it.
We leave and i tell her i'll walk her home which was a few blocks away, she stops to get dinner and i tell her i'll wait outside while she runs into Cosi's. I'm smoking outside and i see an ice cream truck and she just happens to call me at the same time so i tell her....im going to run and grab something real quick, i'll meet you outside.
I run and grab 2 vanilla cones. I'm standing outside waiting and realize we have to eat these cones real quick since it's melting fast. So i bring it in and give it to her. We're walking back and now this is were it gets tricky.... (since i can't tell if she interested or not). She first tells me her room mates home who she doesn't like and is kind of scared to see. I tell her not to worry about it. She points to her apartment and realizes that her room mate isn't home and blah blah. She ask's me if i want to check out her apartment and i say sure. We get to her apartment and she can't find her keys......she empties out her whole purse and can't find them. I wasn't doubting her as she did it infront of me but still. I ask her how she's going to get in, locksmith, super, but she said her friend has a key in brooklyn and the train was a block away. I walk her to the train and give her a hug and leave.
when i get home, i send her a text asking if she got home alright and called it a night.
----
Took the girl that i met at the club out. I wasn't too interested in her so i just straight up sent her a text to grab drinks which she agreed. I asked her at 3pm and she got back at 5pm and at 7pm we got drinks. We got along great and she's actually way better than i expected. She's a bit plain but doesn't repulse me when i talk to her which happens alot with alot of dumb ho3s or ditzy girls. She did like 80% of the talking just about moving, work, etc. and i just answered her questions and asked her more without telling her anything about myself.
Weird thing was she literally asked me nothing about me.....not sure if its because she already knows from her friends or what not but i found that strange, a small turn off or a sign of disinterest. All she asked about in our 2 hours of drinking together was where i was from, what highschool i went to, and what i do now. She also asked about why that girl and guy couple wanted to fight me the other night, which i just said they basically tried to gang up on the bday girl and i wasn't having it.
We leave and i tell her i'll walk her home which was a few blocks away, she stops to get dinner and i tell her i'll wait outside while she runs into Cosi's. I'm smoking outside and i see an ice cream truck and she just happens to call me at the same time so i tell her....im going to run and grab something real quick, i'll meet you outside.
I run and grab 2 vanilla cones. I'm standing outside waiting and realize we have to eat these cones real quick since it's melting fast. So i bring it in and give it to her. We're walking back and now this is were it gets tricky.... (since i can't tell if she interested or not). She first tells me her room mates home who she doesn't like and is kind of scared to see. I tell her not to worry about it. She points to her apartment and realizes that her room mate isn't home and blah blah. She ask's me if i want to check out her apartment and i say sure. We get to her apartment and she can't find her keys......she empties out her whole purse and can't find them. I wasn't doubting her as she did it infront of me but still. I ask her how she's going to get in, locksmith, super, but she said her friend has a key in brooklyn and the train was a block away. I walk her to the train and give her a hug and leave.
when i get home, i send her a text asking if she got home alright and called it a night.
Somedude_UK_31
Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 22, 2012
- Messages
- 71
- Reaction score
- 2
Hey man, did she get back to you?AAAgent said:
Once i got home i sent her this text
AAA: Did you get home alright?
HB6: Yes i did! U get back ok?
AAA: Yeah. Glad to hear that. Good night.
HB6: Night!
i leave her alone for Wednesday and thursday and friday morning at 11:30am i send her a text
AAA: hey
AAA: I was wondering if your free to grab dinner tonight? (not my style of asking nicely but my friend told me to be less ****y so i try it)
6 hours pass and nothing.....
HB6: Hi sorry i can't. I made plans with work ppl. I might be going with xxx (birthday/mutual friend) tonight. Should come out.
Although i know all the girls, im not in the mood to entertain a whole bunch of girls and plus i had to get up early the next morning so i said no.
AAA: Don't worry about it. I'm heading to see my family later tonight so i won't be able to make it this time. Hope you have fun.
hb6: Thanks! U too!
that was friday night and this monday morning i text her again at 10:15am
AAA: Hey
AAA: How was your weekend
2 hours
HB6: Relaxing didn't do much. Just watched dramas. u?
AAA: Haha what drama were u watching? Just chilled with the guys and dropped off some bday presents.
She calls my phone as im walking into the gym and i missed her call. I didn't call her back but she sent me a few texts while i was in the gym and we continued the convo. I didn't tell her why i didn't pick up.
hb6: I just finished off xxxx xxxxx, started on blah blah
hb6: btw lost the apartment to someone else....
AAA: did not watch xxxx but blah blah is good.
AAA: that sucks...Any back up places?
HB6: Lol! I don't know many who watch dramas.
HB6: Nope
AAA: They are good haha
AAA: Anyways, are you free for dinner tomorrow night? (right as i ask her out again she sends a text simultaneously below)
hb6: I meant to write don't know many guys who watch them
20 mins pass
AAA: haha i don't tell ppl i watch them so keep it on the dl.
that ended at 3pm and its 9pm no answer....I do like hard to get....but don't be annoying about it geeze. She's going to have to answer me otherwise it'd be pretty weird as we have the same friends. She can just say yes or no.
hope you guys have better luck than me.
AAA: Did you get home alright?
HB6: Yes i did! U get back ok?
AAA: Yeah. Glad to hear that. Good night.
HB6: Night!
i leave her alone for Wednesday and thursday and friday morning at 11:30am i send her a text
AAA: hey
AAA: I was wondering if your free to grab dinner tonight? (not my style of asking nicely but my friend told me to be less ****y so i try it)
6 hours pass and nothing.....
HB6: Hi sorry i can't. I made plans with work ppl. I might be going with xxx (birthday/mutual friend) tonight. Should come out.
Although i know all the girls, im not in the mood to entertain a whole bunch of girls and plus i had to get up early the next morning so i said no.
AAA: Don't worry about it. I'm heading to see my family later tonight so i won't be able to make it this time. Hope you have fun.
hb6: Thanks! U too!
that was friday night and this monday morning i text her again at 10:15am
AAA: Hey
AAA: How was your weekend
2 hours
HB6: Relaxing didn't do much. Just watched dramas. u?
AAA: Haha what drama were u watching? Just chilled with the guys and dropped off some bday presents.
She calls my phone as im walking into the gym and i missed her call. I didn't call her back but she sent me a few texts while i was in the gym and we continued the convo. I didn't tell her why i didn't pick up.
hb6: I just finished off xxxx xxxxx, started on blah blah
hb6: btw lost the apartment to someone else....
AAA: did not watch xxxx but blah blah is good.
AAA: that sucks...Any back up places?
HB6: Lol! I don't know many who watch dramas.
HB6: Nope
AAA: They are good haha
AAA: Anyways, are you free for dinner tomorrow night? (right as i ask her out again she sends a text simultaneously below)
hb6: I meant to write don't know many guys who watch them
20 mins pass
AAA: haha i don't tell ppl i watch them so keep it on the dl.
that ended at 3pm and its 9pm no answer....I do like hard to get....but don't be annoying about it geeze. She's going to have to answer me otherwise it'd be pretty weird as we have the same friends. She can just say yes or no.
hope you guys have better luck than me.
Somedude_UK_31
Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 22, 2012
- Messages
- 71
- Reaction score
- 2
Wao dude, you have patience and not easily upset...I guess that means you are confident.
I must admit I would've taken her hours to reply personally and messed it up right from the start. Thanks for sharing, I'm learning from you!
I must admit I would've taken her hours to reply personally and messed it up right from the start. Thanks for sharing, I'm learning from you!
not much progress with girls as I don't really have a drive to proactively go after them.
Well that girl that i had drinks with eventually got back to me 6 hours later after asking her out to dinner and told me she was seeing somebody. She said we could still be friends and i just told her. No worries and have a great weekend.
I have enough friends. Later on when i hung out with her friends....they kept trying to make me feel bad or something and asked if i was dating anyone and that i should use dating sites. Also mentioning their friend once in a while and her man as if it would make me feel bad.
finally a 2 months later i see her again. She comes and talks to me but I out of instinct of just rejecting girls that talk to me i brushed her off. She ended up walking away and just looks at me all night. She brings her BF out to the next group gathering and he's a cool guy...she get's wasted and is making out with him at the club we're all at....next party we go to she gets wasted again and get's kicked out and apparently punches him in the face.
In the end, she seemed really unhappy with him and he was a really cool guy that put up her with hot mess. I guess i dodged a bullet or maybe she was upset she couldn't be with me haha.
Well that girl that i had drinks with eventually got back to me 6 hours later after asking her out to dinner and told me she was seeing somebody. She said we could still be friends and i just told her. No worries and have a great weekend.
I have enough friends. Later on when i hung out with her friends....they kept trying to make me feel bad or something and asked if i was dating anyone and that i should use dating sites. Also mentioning their friend once in a while and her man as if it would make me feel bad.
finally a 2 months later i see her again. She comes and talks to me but I out of instinct of just rejecting girls that talk to me i brushed her off. She ended up walking away and just looks at me all night. She brings her BF out to the next group gathering and he's a cool guy...she get's wasted and is making out with him at the club we're all at....next party we go to she gets wasted again and get's kicked out and apparently punches him in the face.
In the end, she seemed really unhappy with him and he was a really cool guy that put up her with hot mess. I guess i dodged a bullet or maybe she was upset she couldn't be with me haha.
**Crazy Update**
I almost had to call the cops on my female roommate but due to the fact that this was during the aftermath of hurricane sandy and I was still out of power along with people out of food and dying...i decided not to.
I almost had to call the cops on my female roommate but due to the fact that this was during the aftermath of hurricane sandy and I was still out of power along with people out of food and dying...i decided not to.
Well, my new female room mate moved in. I live with 3 girls and when one of the girls was moving out, i asked if a guy could move in to make it more fair. Well, 2 weeks later i come home to a new random girl living in my apartment. Pretty fvcked up but i'm like whatever (i found this apartment too and it was originally 2 guys and 2 girls living here). I meet the new girl and she's already buddy buddy with the girls and tries to become friends with me. I'm skeptical but i give her a chance.
She's actually pretty cool and has a chill bf that i like. We even played xbox together a few times. She then asked me about why i didn't talk to one of my room mates and I told her that the crazy room mate in the past has offered to fly me to China to see her, cut my cable cord the first week she moved in and also wanted to throw me a special good bye party. Most recently the craziest thing i found was.....
I come home and a week after buying a new toothepaste i see the same exact one in the bathroom....maybe i'm over thinking this i say to myself. Then i see the same exact floss in the bathroom. I top it all off finally i see the same color loofah and the same exact type of body wash. I ask the new girl, "please tell me some of that sh1t is yours, otherwise that's fvcking creepy." Luckily the loofah and body wash were hers so i said it was just a misunderstanding and i was overthinking. She said no worries and she won't tell anyone about it.
Well she tells the crazy room mate about it. She confronts me when everyone leaves the apartment at like 9pm at night right as i'm about to leave the apartment and ask if we can talk. She starts saying why im talking sh1t about her behind her back and i told her it was a misunderstanding. She asks me if I think she likes me which i say yes. She then curses at me and yells. I try to talk but she cuts me off. this happens about 3 times and after the third time i tell her.
"If you cut me off 1 more time, I'm going to leave. This won't get resolved and we'll have this tension here remaining. I've let you talk for a good 15 minutes now. Are you done?"
she then presumes to curse me off and tell me to "get the fvck out then." "Fvcking leave!" i'm thinking... this is as much my apartment as yours but i do need to leave and I do.
I ignore her for the rest of the time....the new girl comes up to me to apologize for talking. I ignore that too. I gave her the benefit of the doubt the first time and befriended her, Fool me twice, shame on me.
---------------
Crazy part
Well 2 days later crazy girl comes and gives me her rent portion randomly asking nicely if i could take care of it this time as she did it last time. I say yes reluctantly finding it weird that she's always super nice and cold.
another 2 days later
after everyone is gone from the apartment again she knocks on my door asking to talk. I tell her i gave her the chance to talk already and she chose not to clear the air. That opportunity has passed and i told her to leave me alone. She continues to knock on my door begging me to talk with her.
"AAA can we please talk?" "Can i talk to you AAA?" "AAA please i just want to talk." "Why do you think I like you? I just want to know."
Saying all kinds of freaky sh1t knocking on my door for over an hour. She finally decides to leave and i hear the front door open and her footsteps go downstairs. I wait a few minutes then i finally open up my door. When i open my door i see the front door of my apartment still open and then i immediately hear the crazy girl RUN upstairs screaming "AAA can we please talk? Please."
I was like wtf......I immediately close my door and lock it. I've been moving sh1t back into my car lately because i knew some crazy sh1t would happen but not this bad. I packed up all my expensive sh1t and waiting in my room for another 1.5 hours to pass. She continues to bang on my door begging me to talk to her and ask's me why i think she likes me. finally after an hour she stops banging and i give it 30 minutes before i decide to leave the apartment.
I open my room door and she has a chair placed infront of my room door waiting for me and now is in my face asking me to please talk to her. I make a quick walk to put on my shoes and head toward the front door but she blocks it spreading her arms wide open. I just move her aside and get the fvck out of there.
She's actually pretty cool and has a chill bf that i like. We even played xbox together a few times. She then asked me about why i didn't talk to one of my room mates and I told her that the crazy room mate in the past has offered to fly me to China to see her, cut my cable cord the first week she moved in and also wanted to throw me a special good bye party. Most recently the craziest thing i found was.....
I come home and a week after buying a new toothepaste i see the same exact one in the bathroom....maybe i'm over thinking this i say to myself. Then i see the same exact floss in the bathroom. I top it all off finally i see the same color loofah and the same exact type of body wash. I ask the new girl, "please tell me some of that sh1t is yours, otherwise that's fvcking creepy." Luckily the loofah and body wash were hers so i said it was just a misunderstanding and i was overthinking. She said no worries and she won't tell anyone about it.
Well she tells the crazy room mate about it. She confronts me when everyone leaves the apartment at like 9pm at night right as i'm about to leave the apartment and ask if we can talk. She starts saying why im talking sh1t about her behind her back and i told her it was a misunderstanding. She asks me if I think she likes me which i say yes. She then curses at me and yells. I try to talk but she cuts me off. this happens about 3 times and after the third time i tell her.
"If you cut me off 1 more time, I'm going to leave. This won't get resolved and we'll have this tension here remaining. I've let you talk for a good 15 minutes now. Are you done?"
she then presumes to curse me off and tell me to "get the fvck out then." "Fvcking leave!" i'm thinking... this is as much my apartment as yours but i do need to leave and I do.
I ignore her for the rest of the time....the new girl comes up to me to apologize for talking. I ignore that too. I gave her the benefit of the doubt the first time and befriended her, Fool me twice, shame on me.
---------------
Crazy part
Well 2 days later crazy girl comes and gives me her rent portion randomly asking nicely if i could take care of it this time as she did it last time. I say yes reluctantly finding it weird that she's always super nice and cold.
another 2 days later
after everyone is gone from the apartment again she knocks on my door asking to talk. I tell her i gave her the chance to talk already and she chose not to clear the air. That opportunity has passed and i told her to leave me alone. She continues to knock on my door begging me to talk with her.
"AAA can we please talk?" "Can i talk to you AAA?" "AAA please i just want to talk." "Why do you think I like you? I just want to know."
Saying all kinds of freaky sh1t knocking on my door for over an hour. She finally decides to leave and i hear the front door open and her footsteps go downstairs. I wait a few minutes then i finally open up my door. When i open my door i see the front door of my apartment still open and then i immediately hear the crazy girl RUN upstairs screaming "AAA can we please talk? Please."
I was like wtf......I immediately close my door and lock it. I've been moving sh1t back into my car lately because i knew some crazy sh1t would happen but not this bad. I packed up all my expensive sh1t and waiting in my room for another 1.5 hours to pass. She continues to bang on my door begging me to talk to her and ask's me why i think she likes me. finally after an hour she stops banging and i give it 30 minutes before i decide to leave the apartment.
I open my room door and she has a chair placed infront of my room door waiting for me and now is in my face asking me to please talk to her. I make a quick walk to put on my shoes and head toward the front door but she blocks it spreading her arms wide open. I just move her aside and get the fvck out of there.
You essentially upped your VALUE in her eyes by showing her that, if she wants you, she has to at times do things that you like to do. You are SOMETHING after all. You are NOT FREE. If she wants to hang with you, it's going to cost her something — time, effort, money.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.