2nd annual approach anxiety competition

roman81

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Robyn, your advice was gold, playing cool really worked a treat, i asked a few questions and let her run with it, this one is a talker bla bla bla, we sat opposite each other to start with, however with the teasing (i did end up using the your i smell a stalker line) and standing off, it got her to initiate kino and by the second coffee we were sitting knee to knee, i had my arm around her but still i didn't feel cheeky enough to go in for a kiss while we were sitting down. However as we were leaving i did the what's that over there and stole a kiss on the edge of her lips which turned into a snog, she said to call but we didn't arrange another date though. Some of the things that worried me were that she seemed non fazed what so ever, total confidence through out, she mentioned interest from other guys(my reply was ****, i just said OK) , also she didn't offer to pay for either of the coffees. The positives for me were that i kept my frame most of the time, kept good eye contact and had good banter going most of the time.

Your thoughts are welcome.
 

Masculinity

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Bold: Areas on which I am commenting.
Blue: My comments.

roman81 said:
Robyn, your advice was gold, playing cool really worked a treat, i asked a few questions and let her run with it, this one is a talker bla bla bla, we sat opposite each other to start with, however with the teasing (i did end up using the your i smell a stalker line) and standing off.

Post the conversation as a transcript so that we can see the dialogue!

it got her to initiate kino Beautiful.

and by the second coffee we were sitting knee to knee, i had my arm around her Second Second coffee? Dude, this is on fire so far. You built enough interest to get her to invest more time with you.


but still i didn't feel cheeky enough to go in for a kiss while we were sitting down. However as we were leaving i did the what's that over there and stole a kiss on the edge of her lips which turned into a snog

Nice, was this during the day? You got a make out session from just going for it.

she said to call but we didn't arrange another date though.

This is the equivalent to "I want you" to a male. When a woman says "call me," I usually respond with "YOU call me! You want me and you know it ;) " It will get you a smile and show your confidence is through the roof. Work on your own response for next time and make her work for you. Remember, she wants you until proven otherwise.


Some of the things that worried me were that she seemed non fazed what so ever, total confidence through out,

This doesn't mean anything; it's just a mind game to show she isn't easy. Her request to call outweighs this. Good observation, though.

she mentioned interest from other guys (my reply was ****, i just said OK) This sounds like both a sh!t test on how you keep your composure & confidence AND a way to show value. I would have responded with something like "dude, guys are so desperate nowadays; it's unbelievable how most men behave like little boys" or something along those lines that separates you from the pack without actually verbalizing it. Make sense?

also she didn't offer to pay for either of the coffees.

This could be anything. Maybe she was busy checking you out, thinking about kissing you, or maybe she simply forgot. Don't ask "hey look, I'm not going to pay for coffee again" or make it awkward. Just casually say something along the lines of

You: this coffee is delicious.
Her: Yeah, it's a blah, blah, blah
You: Definitely, next round is on you ;)

It's amazing what women will do if you put your foot down and have your b@lls on right.


The positives for me were that i kept my frame most of the time, kept good eye contact and had good banter going most of the time.

Very good. You could work on a few small details, but you handled the great majority nicely.
 
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Rubato

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So far this has been my worst foray back to college approach wise since discovering game. I have cold approached a grand total of 1 girl so far, someone in my chemistry lab, and I got her number. By this time last semester, I had number closed about 10 girls!

In addition to the 1 girl from my chem class, I will also count 1 girl who helped me ship my latest batch of orders at UPS. She was a cutie and if I had been a little more with it, I probably would have realized the opportunity I missed. I have a good deal of options right now that I have not yet begun to exploit and my apathy level towards cold approaching and getting even more options is unacceptably high. I had an international order to ship but was missing some required information and she wrote down the dimensions of the order, the weight, and some other information with a bunch of smiley faces and doodles. I should have asked her for her digits. I go there a lot and I've never seen her before, I assume she's new. I'll go for it next time.

I honestly don't know that I've opened anyone else. I'm going out sarging either tonight or tomorrow night and will open at least another 7 women. But I've gotta get my day game act back together! It's not good! It's not AA or anything like that, I just don't feel driven to do anything.
 
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Ok so I'm almost done the weeks task, I think... I'm counting the women we have to approach as HB's? Because that's the whole point right, haha.

HBs (1/3)
-Some girl I saw at the grocery store, she smiled at me then kinda turned away back to shopping but I said hi, anyway...she responded with a hi, how are you, and I replied with a good! how are you? and kept walking...maybe I should have continued the conversation but I felt weird about it since she was in the middle of picking out food.

Other People (4/4)

-Some guy I made conversation with at traffic court about his ticket...lol
-Another guy I was kinda friendly with at traffic court who I greeted
-Some girl in a bookstore that I wouldn't say qualified as an HB (just greeted her)
-Another older woman at the bookstore looking at maternity books, lol.

The HB's in my adventure were lacking, I'll just have to look harder tomorrow to complete the task I suppose. Maybe I'll go to the mall. Also, are bookstores good places to do pick ups? They seem like they would be, since you can pretty much do an observational opener thing in regards to what the girl is reading or whatever. Any experienced DJ's care to comment on this?
 

Gray The Prince

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thesicilianprince said:
Ok so I'm almost done the weeks task, I think... I'm counting the women we have to approach as HB's? Because that's the whole point right, haha.

HBs (1/3)
-Some girl I saw at the grocery store, she smiled at me then kinda turned away back to shopping but I said hi, anyway...she responded with a hi, how are you, and I replied with a good! how are you? and kept walking...maybe I should have continued the conversation but I felt weird about it since she was in the middle of picking out food.

Other People (4/4)

-Some guy I made conversation with at traffic court about his ticket...lol
-Another guy I was kinda friendly with at traffic court who I greeted
-Some girl in a bookstore that I wouldn't say qualified as an HB (just greeted her)
-Another older woman at the bookstore looking at maternity books, lol.

The HB's in my adventure were lacking, I'll just have to look harder tomorrow to complete the task I suppose. Maybe I'll go to the mall. Also, are bookstores good places to do pick ups? They seem like they would be, since you can pretty much do an observational opener thing in regards to what the girl is reading or whatever. Any experienced DJ's care to comment on this?

A bookstore is a great place to do pick ups. That's where I did my first ever cold approaches at. Go for it and see what happens. For some uys, this is their bread and butter, for others not so much. This will be a good way to see where you are most comfortable picking up women at.
 

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

TheMusic

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I've done a few more hi's to other people. However, I still need one more Hot Girl Hi. And now I have a problem. Tomorrow I have to make a big school project, and in the evening I'm going ice skating with a hot girl. I guess I'll have to say hi then... :) Good luck for all the other last minute people. & Robyn; your comments are very helpful, thanks!
 

whitebelt

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Back to SS bringing you some of the most boring stories ever:

- Approached this hot girl selling car insurance, asked her how much will my insurance policy go up next year if I crashed my bike..etc. Felt nice talking to a hot girl smiling and willing to answer all my questions, but pretty pointless in the end. Good eye contact though..
- Asked a lady in Carrefour where they kept the coffee. She said it's her first day there so she's as lost as I was
- Asked HB7 to pick a hot chocolate box for me because I couldn't make up my mind. Shed did and walked away immediately. That just felt POINTLESS.

So.. what's the point of all this and what could have I done better?
Oh and thanks for the feedback.
 
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^ The point is that every experience makes you better and that you're actually going out and trying to improve! This alone puts you at a higher level than all the AFC's out there. That's how I look at it anyway. I'm inexperienced as well though, perhaps some DJ's on here will have more concrete advice.
 

DonJuanit0

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There is this waitress in the cafe I hang out with my friends, she is new there. First time we had a convo it was like this:

Me: Hey, how are you?
Her: Fine, how are you?
Me: Fine too, 1 coffee

Second time,

Me: Hey get me 1 cappucino pls
Her: Why cappucino today? (I've been ordering an other coffee all the time)
Me: I don't really know what I want just get me what is harder for you to prepare!
Her: Ok, I'll make you what's easiest
Me:(As walking up the to the second floor) The hardest!!

When she brings me the coffee she asks me if the coffee is ok
I try, and I put it back on her plate saying that it's not ok, she laughs and puts it back! We laughed a bit and that was it!

Today, I go in,

Me: Did you learn how to make that coffee?
Her: I knew anyway
Me: Ok I want that
Her: (When she brings the coffee) Try it!
Me: (I pretend to get burned)
Her: I'm looking only at your lips
Me: It's fine!!

She doesn't eye contact me but she has that smile when we talk (no she doesn't have it with every customer :p)

I'm thinking about asking her name the next time, and tell her that I know a place where they actually know how to make a good coffee, if she wants us to go!

I'm inexperienced in this kind of game so I want an advise, if someone can come up with something better or has something to say that I don't clearly see here! We laugh a lot when we talk!

I post it here cause due to this post I talked to her more than I normally would!
 

It doesn't matter how good-looking you are, how romantic you are, how funny you are... or anything else. If she doesn't have something INVESTED in you and the relationship, preferably quite a LOT invested, she'll dump you, without even the slightest hesitation, as soon as someone a little more "interesting" comes along.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

TheMusic

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Hot Girls (3/3)
- Was at a performance of my little brother. Talked to a damn hot girl (I think I remembered her but dunno). Made her laugh, talked about things we had in common, and all of that in 5 minutes.

Other people (6/4)
- Not important.

Even though I had a hard time on this one (damn, and it's only the beginning..) I'm glad to say that I completed this week's assignment!
 
R

Rubato

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No one was f*cking out tonight. I went out with Racecar and admittedly, tonight may have been the worst night of the week to sarge. We had a snowstorm hit, it's blisteringly cold out, and I guess no one felt like going out. I opened 3 girls tonight and I feel like that was a feat in and of itself. I got some audio of the one girl I actually formally opened in the bar that I'll post in the morning, but it was a horrifically bad set. I didn't really care about anything tonight... I've got a cold, I don't feel good, I'm tired, I already have options. So like I said, I don't care.

I was talking to Racecar about openers and a lone wolf suddenly appeared. I started making up this ridiculous opener in a fake British accent about how "seeing you is like finding an oasis in the middle of a hot desert" and (it was snowing very hard) "Do you know how many times I've walked back and forth across these streets tonight looking for a face like what I see before me?"

It was a big joke to me but Racecar was cracking up and told me to go for it. I finished my beer and sat next to her. She looked over at me, smiled and said hello. That was the high point.

First, I f*cked up the line.

"Seeing you is like looking in to a desert"... [wait, that's not right...]

She looked away at this point and was clearly annoyed.

I kept going... i'm not sure what I said here, I was just plowing. The bartender asked me if I needed a drink, and I politely declined.

"I've walked up and down these streets for hours, braving the cold, thinking to myself if I could just find a face like yours..."

By this point, the girl hadn't acknowledged that I even existed and was actively annoyed and ignoring me. So I ejected.

At least I had the stones to go with it and plow.
 
R

Rubato

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I finished up today. 2 girls in line at the post office.

I used the same line on both: "I see you have a big package there." :rolleyes:

Both of the girls I said that to laughed. It was funnier with the second girl because I had a lot of boxes (a few computers I'm shipping and several other smaller things) and all she had was this small little box.

I wouldn't normally use a line like that, but this competition is supposed to be about dealing with AA. If I had just said hello, that wouldn't have done much to throw me out of my comfort zone and deal with AA.
 

whitebelt

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I went to the club last night, did 3 approaches:

1. Talked to a cute blond girl until one of her guys friend (not her bf, she told me she didn't have one) took her by her hand and started talking to her like I wasn't even there. I told him - Hey, I'd do the same if I were you, be protective and ****, so if you want me to leave just kiss her and I'll be out. He laughed and I left.

2. Different club. Went to talk to this tall brunette just as she was getting ready to leave. She was all smiles but the message she conveyed was - no, sorry, gotta go. Nice way to get blown off - that actually felt GOOD!

3. HB8 surrounded by guys, walked to her and asked "Which one is your boyfriend", she said she doesn't have one, she's here just to dance and have fun. Asked her girl-friend if I can steal her away to a more quiet corner were we can talk. She said yes. Took her by the hand, sat 10 minutes down at a table, got number (!!), left.

Overall, very fun night. Alcohol must have played a role in this I guess.

Gotta go for a coffee. with a male friend.

PS: Task finished. I'm waiting for the next one. Many thanks to the OP, this thread already helped.
 

martini92

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I am working at mcD and convenient for this task I was put in the lobby for both saturday and sunday, so i took it as a chance of atleast saying hi too lots of people and I did quite good, though I dont think I actully said hello to all the HBs necessary, girls yes but HBs only 1...
 

Just because a woman listens to you and acts interested in what you say doesn't mean she really is. She might just be acting polite, while silently wishing that the date would hurry up and end, or that you would go away... and never come back.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Archway

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So I've made the number of hi's this week, in no particular order.

# - Girl working in department store, asked her about the brands they sell, she said she wernt sure as she is just a temp, seemed embarrassed and ending up blushing with her friend

# - woman at bus stop - just said hey, has XX bus gone yet, she said nah and asked if I was going to 'so and so' said yh, as we were talking bus comes along and she shouts as in to say its pulled up over there, had to half run for it

# - outside a busy train station, see two pretty girls, ask them for directions to such and such road, they tell me 'yh go there etc etc' I try to hold strong eye contact with one of them (who had beautiful eyes by the way), and she gives a lil smile when I think she notices, and so I move on..

# - in said train station again, having a look at the newly renovated concourse, and admiring the juxtaposition of the new architecture against the old (listed) buildings in the background, when I see another dude trying to look through the hoardings aswell to get a look, I say hi and we have a little talk about how great the place looks and how its coming along.

# same station, see a girl hanging around outside so I ask her for directions to XX road, says she has no idea as she's just waiting for a friend, I ask where she's from and tells me she's from Cambridge, I make the assumption she studies at the university there and she laughs and blows it off saying she's just at a local college, we talk abit more about all the people around here that have no idea where anything is or those working around the area who seem oblivious to anything other than what directly concerns them.

few other hi's to shop workers in book store's, and people I have seen at work but never said hello to, until now, so just introduced myself to them etc

and a brief chat with a security guard who I'm sure thought I was trying to steal something or was up to something dodgy, as I couldnt find what I was looking for in a local store.

Walked passed way too many opportunities, to say hello to some more girls that were hot, the AA was still strong when it came to those that were >HB6

so all in all, was ok'ish..

Thanks again to the OP, and those involved in the task posting up motivational vids etc
 

Sidd10001110101

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Ok guys I done this with at least 7 prob more. I notice it is kinda more difficult to talk to peoples when you are consciously trying to be more social or so it seems to me. Also notice that I can almost tell just from how I'm feeling how girls are gonna react to me. But this isn't about reaction so much as about facing the fears eh and having fun with it.

Most of people I talked to met at pool hall since me and some buddies been playing way too much pool lately. I will go into more details on future missions I am just wrecked and tired right now.

From memory, 1 talked to girl by acting like I knew her and guessed her name (was Sarah I guessed Sandra, not far off w my psychic powers) she was pretty receptive, talked to girl workin as server about hockey blah blah she said she wanted to go to a game, approached this group of 6-7 girls(wouldn't of even considered doing this normally). This was kinda difficult and I was definitely getting icy reception at first but plowed through it and at least a few of em warmed up. Talked about high school, cameras, blah blah fluff I guess. Was more this week but not all memorable. I know much of you guys much better at this than me so good to read what you all are writing.
 

DonJuanit0

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Last night as I was working a HB 7 came in! She was wearing sport clothes and had a bag, so I asked her if she was at the gym! She said yes and I asked her for how long have she be going there, she answered me and we kept talking for about 3 minutes about gym staff! When her food was ready we said goodbye to each other and she left!

Other girl, also in work.
She came in and I was making a bizzare crepe for delivery! She asked me what I was making there and I told her! I then asked her if she liked it and wanted to make ehr the same! She was all laughs and I noticed she held a helmet so I asked her if she had a motorbike, she replied yes and we had a fun convo about how dangerous it is to drive 3 AM on a motorbike! She kept laughing and then she left! My co-worker who is also a woman told me: "She liked you a lot" I told her that I figured from the way she was laughing all the time.
 

Masculinity

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TheMusic said:
I've done a few more hi's to other people. However, I still need one more Hot Girl Hi. And now I have a problem. Tomorrow I have to make a big school project, and in the evening I'm going ice skating with a hot girl. I guess I'll have to say hi then... :) Good luck for all the other last minute people. & Robyn; your comments are very helpful, thanks!
I'm glad I could help. How did it go with your hot date?

whitebelt said:
Back to SS bringing you some of the most boring stories ever:

- Approached this hot girl selling car insurance, asked her how much will my insurance policy go up next year if I crashed my bike..etc.

You could have taken this to the next level after asking for insurance and said "you know, I don't really need insurance. I came over because you're cute and I wanted to come over & say hi ;)" Or something along those lines.

Felt nice talking to a hot girl smiling and willing to answer all my questions, but pretty pointless in the end.

The point is to get you used to al kinds of situations including positive, awkward, negative, etc.
- Asked a lady in Carrefour where they kept the coffee. She said it's her first day there so she's as lost as I was
- Asked HB7 to pick a hot chocolate box for me because I couldn't make up my mind. Shed did and walked away immediately. That just felt POINTLESS.

So.. what's the point of all this and what could have I done better?
The point of all this is to get used to talking to people of all kinds. If you can't talk to the lady in the street or your bratty little sister, how are you going to handle a hot woman when she gives you an attitude or challenges you? It may feel pointless now, but you will be glad as you interact with attractive women more.



DonJuanit0 said:
There is this waitress in the cafe I hang out with my friends, she is new there. First time we had a convo it was like this:

Me: Hey, how are you?
Her: Fine, how are you?
Me: Fine too, 1 coffee

Second time,

Me: Hey get me 1 cappucino pls
Her: Why cappucino today? (I've been ordering an other coffee all the time)
Me: I don't really know what I want just get me what is harder for you to prepare!
Her: Ok, I'll make you what's easiest
Me:(As walking up the to the second floor) The hardest!!

When she brings me the coffee she asks me if the coffee is ok
I try, and I put it back on her plate saying that it's not ok, she laughs and puts it back! We laughed a bit and that was it!

Today, I go in,

Me: Did you learn how to make that coffee?
Her: I knew anyway
Me: Ok I want that
Her: (When she brings the coffee) Try it!
Me: (I pretend to get burned) This is gold :rockon:
Her: I'm looking only at your lips This was a great opportunity to misinterpret what she said and accuse her of seducing you :rolleyes:
Me: It's fine!!

She doesn't eye contact me but she has that smile when we talk (no she doesn't have it with every customer :p)


I'm thinking about asking her name the next time, and tell her that I know a place where they actually know how to make a good coffee, if she wants us to go!

This is good stuff. I would take advantage of it and number close her when you go to the restaurant next time

I'm inexperienced in this kind of game so I want an advise, if someone can come up with something better or has something to say that I don't clearly see here! We laugh a lot when we talk!

What you want to do is misinterpret what she says. You want to make it seem as if she's making a move on you and you're pushing her away. More often than not, they will see it the same way. It is called a self-fulfilling prophecy, which means since you are acting like she wants you, she picks up on this and reacts in the same way. Hence, you acting like she wants you actually MAKES her want you. I think you're doing great with your conversations. I would add a little more teasing and then reward her with a comment and then telling her to give you her number

I post it here cause due to this post I talked to her more than I normally would!
Keep this up. I like how you manage these conversations.



Packers2010 said:
hey guys.

this is what i did today.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?p=1878474&posted=1#post1878474

i will post in here from now on and not making more threads.

if you like you can post back in this thread or the other one. i don't care.
I'll give you feedback on the content you post here. If you don't have the time for a few more extra clicks to post here, I don't have the time to give you feedback--your call!
 

TheMusic

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My hot chick cancelled the date, 'cause her parents made an appointment with some teacher to help her with schoolstuff...
She said she was really sorry and wanted to make it up to me, so we'll see.
When will the next challenge be posted btw?
 
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