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    FRAME

    That’s horse sh1t lol. Your values & identity are always in a state of flux, based on your environment. For instance, as a kid one of your core values might be “drugs are bad.” Your parents, teachers, etc. all tell you drugs are bad. But then you get to middle school and all your friends smoke...
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    FRAME

    Simple: Frame is your experience of yourself. Game is your ability to draw other people into that experience. Notice I didn't say anything about reality or the environment or defining the relationships around you. Those are tangential. Your experience of all of those things flows from your...
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    So is Daygame type stuff even worth it in college?

    You have to approach a college campus like 'social circle game.' It's all warm approaches (assuming you go there)--think of the school as the mutual friend introducing you. So I'd approach it like everyone there is already your friend, and you just want to have fun with everybody. That's...
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    Pretty sure that I am about to get dumped. URGENT

    That is because you are a man. More than that, a self-developed/-ing man. You are capable of standing up to social pressure & taking responsibility for your own decisions, your own emotions, etc. It's a fool's errand to expect the same from women, especially young women, especially young...
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    Male Attractiveness: Does It Lead to Jealousy?

    @sangheilios @longtail etc. Your issues aren't physical, they're social. And most social issues are emotional issues. Will a good looking guy run into a little competition anxiety from time to time? Sure. Are some people not gonna like you? Of course. There are too many people for...
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    Attachment Theory

    I think Attachment-Theory is a useful lens through which to explore relationship dynamics--but I think it's also limited. I've gone on record saying that I would never invest emotionally in a woman who didn't have a solid, respectful relationship with a father-figure who I personally admired...
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    When first courting a woman, how sexual do you make things?

    The goal of texting is to get her in person. That's it. Do the minimum you have to do to accomplish that. IME the more you do over text, the more likely you are to mess things up. In person, I look at it like baking a cake. You think about what kind of cake you want (fvck buddy, potential...
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    New relationship with submissive B D S M girl going smoothly but not becoming that emotional

    Bro, why in the world would you want to develop feelings for this girl? Rationally. Let me hear 'em. What are you hoping to accomplish? Right now, things are set up in a way that works for what she's looking for: Sex without needing to worry about emotionality or the possibility of...
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    The key to grace, game and an attractive personality is dominance

    I think it’s important, at some point, to push the whole dominance thing as far as it’ll go—just because it’s a trait most men totally lack in any meaningful sense. But like others have pointed out, calibrate lol. Dominance is most potent when no one knows it’s happening: when your frame is...
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    BPD girl and pregnancy

    I think it has less to do with the guy and more to do with securing: A lifetime source of narcissistic supply (the baby) Convenient triangulation for ALL of her existing relationships (the baby) A constant distraction from the void and feelings of nothingness (the baby) Pretty scary lol
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    Gratitude & Game

    You can appreciate what you have while still striving for better. Lord knows I wouldn't advocate settling with the first girl who likes you just because you can or using 'contentment' as a rationalization for not pushing yourself. We have one life, so what else are you gonna do? Push it as...
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    Gratitude & Game

    I guess it's that time of year lol. Be thankful, motherfvckers. But on a more serious note, I want to expand on something that I've touched on before but that I think is an integral part of sustaining an internal sense of value & an external motivation for success: With women, with your...
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    What’s the Point if you have to be Mentored your whole life?

    Came in to say this. But, even more than that, enjoy the process of achieving mastery, enjoy the feeling of uncertainty, enjoy the small victories, appreciate the fact that you still have things to learn. That feeling won’t last forever. Having gone through it, I can say that, for me at...
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    How do you choose which girls to cold approach?

    You're overthinking it. Ask yourself: Do I want to meet this girl? If yes, you approach her. If no, you don't. Anything else is dishonest, compromising your integrity, denying your true self, disrespecting the girls who will never have a chance to meet you, allowing fear of rejection to...
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    Bad game to straight up call a girl cute?

    Like others have said, the value of a compliment is relative to the gap between her perceived value of you & her perceived value of herself. So if a homeless guy on the subway calls her cute, she probably runs away. If some celebrity slides in her DMs and calls her cute, she probably writes...
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    Howdy! Been awhile.

    I don't think our time on SS ever overlapped, but I remember seeing your name on a lot of the threads during the time when I was going through my own break up with a girl (that I strongly suspect) had BPD, which is what lead me here in the first place. Don't remember many of the specifics but I...
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    NC, IDGAF, Scarcity in Attention When Treated Poorly

    I was actually toying around with a post on this very matter. It's easy, staring into the face of modern sexual dynamics that are tipped out of your favor, to feel like the victim. Resist that urge; instead look at this as an opportunity to grow. Each relationship & each rejection is a chance...
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    DUMPED over a month ago - Cant seem to shake this sense of loss

    First, understand that what you're going through is natural. You lost access to a good reproductive opportunity--which in the not so distant past was rare. Of course your body--hormones, etc.--are designed to make you feel like sh1t so that you don't lose out on opportunities like that since...
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    Ghosting is Bull****

    There’s a calculus that every man has to make for himself that goes along the lines of: What do I want out of this interaction ? What’s the best way to achieve this outcome? What am I willing to do/not do to achieve this outcome? Starting out, if a guy is susceptible to oneitis & likely to...
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    Is Avoiding Conflict Considered “Beta?”

    Depends. Ideally, you should be comfortable dealing in conflicts where they serve your purpose and competent at avoiding/defusing them where they don't. It all comes down to frame: My frame is that I don't do violence for violence's sake--it has to be strongly justified. My frame is...
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