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member162951
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@BeExcellent re all of this^^, I was raised upper middle class in suburban Westchester, my family belonged to a prestigious yacht club, my dad taught me to sail and race our boat in competition, my parents gave extravagant parties where I basically served as a "prop" for my extremely status conscious mom to show off to her equally status conscious friends, I attended the best schools, I wore the best clothes, etc etc etc.
So YES I am quite aware of the various social classes and what is "appropriate" in certain environments. This is not a knock against either of us because we each bring our own style and value to the table, but I choose to not live my life that way. I don't care whether my handbag is Hermes Kelly, Hermes Birkin or Michael Kors or Coach. Or whether my shoes are Gucci or whomever.
This drove my status conscious mom absolutely bonkers and perhaps I was a bit of a rebel against it, but I chose to take after my dad who immigrated to the U.S. from Lithuania, was raised poor with very little to even eat sometimes, but worked his ass off in school, received a fully-funded scholarship to Columbia University and then NYU Law School and became a very successful attorney, married my mom, moved to a high end neighborhood in Westchester County and raised six kids.
Unlike my mom, he couldn't give a rat's rear end about social class or "status" or designer anything, but he played the part for my mom, until he couldn't anymore and married a beautiful woman on his same wavelength in that regard who became the love of his life.
He was also a true humanitarian, despite his extremely busy professional schedule, he was a member of various organizations serving the under-privileged and he instilled those values in us as well. Helping others not as fortunate as we were.
In truth, I have adopted my dad's values, working hard to achieve your goals despite the obstacles and who "rebel" (for lack of a better word) against status and what society deems "appropriate" and I look for those same qualities and values in the men I date and have relationships with.
As such I moved away from that area to southern California where yes there are people who are extremely status conscious and value the social classes but also those who are not as much, it's much more diverse than where I grew up. This suits me and my style much better.
Also and you (and some men here) may find it odd, but the man who picks me up in his expensive high end BMW or Mercedes Benz wearing his designer suit and attempting to dazzle me by taking me to the best most expensive restaurant on the beach in La Jolla or Del Mar, actually turns me OFF.
100% truth and I have done it!! Much to their dismay.
I much prefer he pick me up in a jeep and take me to a low key pub with great vibe, great music and good eats. Let's share some apps, talk, get to know each other, and connect. On a deeper level than what designer outfit we're wearing or the type of cars we each drive. No thanks.
So yeah to each her own, right? Again, no wrong or right, every woman has her own style, things she values more than others, things about her that men value more than others.
What's important is that we choose people who match what WE ourselves value who are on our same vibrational wave length.
$.02.
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