Is there any solution? I feel like there's no good answer for me. It's all a mess

manfrombelow

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No one can help you if you don't actually want to help yourself first.

This is some hard lesson I learned the hard way about life and people in general.

You guys are wasting too much time and effort for such a lost cause like the OP. Smh.
 

BergischerLöwe

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No one can help you if you don't actually want to help yourself first.

This is some hard lesson I learned the hard way about life and people in general.

You guys are wasting too much time and effort for such a lost cause like the OP. Smh.
I do want to help myself, I'm just not sure of what to do with some aspects of these problems I've described
 

manfrombelow

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I do want to help myself
As someone who used to be in your shoes, please trust me when I say that you DON'T ACTUALLY WANT TO HELP YOURSELF, brother.

You just think you do, but you actually don't. This is deep psychological sh!t.

And believe it or not, I have seen/talked to/interacted with sh!t tons of people just like you.
 

BergischerLöwe

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As someone who used to be in your shoes, please trust me when I say that you DON'T ACTUALLY WANT TO HELP YOURSELF, brother.

You just think you do, but you don't. This is deep psychological sh!t.
How did you get out of the situation you were in? What were the steps you took and what did you change? How did you change your mindset?
 

Ricky

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I am checking into this thread. I can totally relate to the OP because alot of what he says was me pre-game.

I appreciate your honesty BLowe. I think its time for you to create the alter ego. BLowe is the seducer. He tries new things and adapts. Makes little experiments and isnt afraid to fail in the name of progressing a bit every day.

You have alot going for you. Now act like it.

For more on the alter ego concept i think you should read or listen to the David Goggins books and focus on how he had to create kind of a dark side Goggins that never quit in the face of adversity
 

BergischerLöwe

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I am checking into this thread. I can totally relate to the OP because alot of what he says was me pre-game.

I appreciate your honesty BLowe. I think its time for you to create the alter ego. BLowe is the seducer. He tries new things and adapts. Makes little experiments and isnt afraid to fail in the name of progressing a bit every day.

You have alot going for you. Now act like it.

For more on the alter ego concept i think you should read or listen to the David Goggins books and focus on how he had to create kind of a dark side Goggins that never quit in the face of adversity
I've heard of this Goggins fellow, I'll check out more of his stuff. How long did it take you to turn things around in your case? What were the most difficult obstacles and how did you overcome them?
 

characternote

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you can get laid like a rockstar and be unemployed and have very little money. That's for sure. Seen it with multiple friends and i'd even say one of my hottest ever spells was when I was unemployed (and also whilst travelling Europe. Endless pu$$y)

NOT that i'm advising not to find a job lol. Just saying
 

Mike32ct

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I am checking into this thread. I can totally relate to the OP because alot of what he says was me pre-game.

I appreciate your honesty BLowe. I think its time for you to create the alter ego. BLowe is the seducer. He tries new things and adapts. Makes little experiments and isnt afraid to fail in the name of progressing a bit every day.

You have alot going for you. Now act like it.

For more on the alter ego concept i think you should read or listen to the David Goggins books and focus on how he had to create kind of a dark side Goggins that never quit in the face of adversity
Absolutely. I would add that a lot of top former PUAs had a code name or PUA name of sorts. It wasn’t just to have a cute name in the field report. I really believe they were turning on an alter ego before entering the nightclub.

(Just a side note. I don’t want to go off topic on this important thread.)
 
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Ricky

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Absolutely. I would add that a lot of top former PUAs had a code name or PUA name of sorts. It wasn’t just to have a cute name in the field report. I really believe they were turning on an alter ego before entering the nightclub.

(Just a side note. I don’t want to go off topic on this important thread.)
very true. This and the wise premonition that anonymity could be necessary for the future as we know how some of the PUA’s have been labeled as misogynists
 

Ricky

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I've heard of this Goggins fellow, I'll check out more of his stuff. How long did it take you to turn things around in your case? What were the most difficult obstacles and how did you overcome them?
It took sometime for certain and the independent application of a few of the schools of thought then eventually a comingling of their methods.

i will write more when i have a chance
 

Manure Spherian

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Idk what I'd even do as far as a job or if anyone would even hire me. In the past I tried to do freelance translation work on the internet but I fell off the wagon with that. I feel like I need a career advisor or somebody to coach me on this. Gonna look up career counselors in my area
Have you ever considered any f— job that requires you to show up and complete simple tasks for a start? This is likely what you should have tried at fourteen years old.
 
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Gamisch

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I am checking into this thread. I can totally relate to the OP because alot of what he says was me pre-game.

I appreciate your honesty BLowe. I think its time for you to create the alter ego. BLowe is the seducer. He tries new things and adapts. Makes little experiments and isnt afraid to fail in the name of progressing a bit every day.

You have alot going for you. Now act like it.

For more on the alter ego concept i think you should read or listen to the David Goggins books and focus on how he had to create kind of a dark side Goggins that never quit in the face of adversity
Cmon, who hasnt been in his shoes from the pov that you "struggle with yourself " and with women in general .I'd even doubt if you really ever were in his shoes;

- a privileged upbringing
- being a spoiled kid who can live a teenage life at 27
-enough funds from mama and papa so you don't ever have to worry about finances
- wasting time refuses to listen and take commandments/keeps arguing and being a know- it -all.
- feeling like he's better then other men without even knowing them

He's just a spoiled kid. Posts like this actually encourage him to stay who.and where he is.

So ricky, you either didn't read the thread or you were also a spoiled lil b*tfh, then ofcourse you are absolutely right ( no knock on you @Ricky , I know you try to sympathize with OP but PLEASE DO NOT!!!). I dont doubt there are PLENTY of men like this roaming the planet. They simply dont get away with it anymore due to women's abundance of choices. 40 years ago he would at least have a (disobedient and cheating ) wife .

This manchild needs to grow the F up. I bet he showers in all the attention he gets and actually enjoys it. It's just a reflection of his life: no need to ever toughen up as everyone is always "boohoo aawwhh so sad" instead of kicking his lazy azz for once. Never having to take responsibility for anything.

Hey hey hey hey......Smoke weed everyday.


Whatever. Keep encouraging this behavior like its not 100% his own fault .
 

Gamisch

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Just
Cmon, who hasnt been in his shoes from the pov that you "struggle with yourself " and with women in general .I'd even doubt if you really ever were in his shoes;

- a privileged upbringing
- being a spoiled kid who can live a teenage life at 27
-enough funds from mama and papa so you don't ever have to worry about finances
- wasting time refuses to listen and take commandments/keeps arguing and being a know- it -all.
- feeling like he's better then other men without even knowing them

He's just a spoiled kid. Posts like this actually encourage him to stay who.and where he is.

So ricky, you either didn't read the thread or you were also a spoiled lil b*tfh, then ofcourse you are absolutely right ( no knock on you @Ricky , I know you try to sympathize with OP but PLEASE DO NOT!!!). I dont doubt there are PLENTY of men like this roaming the planet. They simply dont get away with it anymore due to women's abundance of choices. 40 years ago he would at least have a (disobedient and cheating ) wife .

This manchild needs to grow the F up. I bet he showers in all the attention he gets and actually enjoys it. It's just a reflection of his life: no need to ever toughen up as everyone is always "boohoo aawwhh so sad" instead of kicking his lazy azz for once. Never having to take responsibility for anything.

Hey hey hey hey......Smoke weed everyday.


Whatever. Keep encouraging this behavior like its not 100% his own fault .
Just worked at a refugees house from Syria, who been through hell and back. He seen chopped up kids, house wS bombed ect.26 years old, even younger than OP. Works his azz off, 3 jobs just to provide for his fam. Traveled all throughout Europe to get a save haven.

Yet this lil spoiled ***** gets showered with attention and sympathy. Un fecking believable.
 

BergischerLöwe

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Cmon, who hasnt been in his shoes from the pov that you "struggle with yourself " and with women in general .I'd even doubt if you really ever were in his shoes;

- a privileged upbringing
- being a spoiled kid who can live a teenage life at 27
-enough funds from mama and papa so you don't ever have to worry about finances
- wasting time refuses to listen and take commandments/keeps arguing and being a know- it -all.
- feeling like he's better then other men without even knowing them

He's just a spoiled kid. Posts like this actually encourage him to stay who.and where he is.

So ricky, you either didn't read the thread or you were also a spoiled lil b*tfh, then ofcourse you are absolutely right ( no knock on you @Ricky , I know you try to sympathize with OP but PLEASE DO NOT!!!). I dont doubt there are PLENTY of men like this roaming the planet. They simply dont get away with it anymore due to women's abundance of choices. 40 years ago he would at least have a (disobedient and cheating ) wife .

This manchild needs to grow the F up. I bet he showers in all the attention he gets and actually enjoys it. It's just a reflection of his life: no need to ever toughen up as everyone is always "boohoo aawwhh so sad" instead of kicking his lazy azz for once. Never having to take responsibility for anything.

Hey hey hey hey......Smoke weed everyday.


Whatever. Keep encouraging this behavior like its not 100% his own fault .
Well what do you think I should do? Just give up on trying to meet the kind of women I want? I’m not trying to be difficult, I’m just frustrated about my situation and am not sure what to do. I may have been born into a somewhat well off family but there was a fair amount of adversity I faced as a kid. I was emotionally and physically abused by my stepfather as a kid and it adversely affected my life trajectory in a number of ways, for example
 
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