soulforge
Master Don Juan
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- Aug 1, 2013
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Cuts both ways.Advice from the old lady:
It’s all over the place really. I know women (including my first husband’s mother) who only had one partner, her husband, was tragically widowed in her 30s. She was utterly unable to pair bond ever again and was the real definition of an alpha widow. She lost her virginity on her wedding night and after her husband (a fighter pilot & instructor) died she never had sex again. She was courted by a physician for about 3 years in her 40s but dropped the guy. Why? No one was ever going to measure up to her late husband.
My mother never had a single date after she and my dad divorced (and she had offers). Not all women are good time Sallies.
My son is dating a woman who is 20. He’s 21. She lost her virginity to him, has only ever been with him, and I expect will marry and “do life” together.
My 18 yo daughter has a LTR since her junior year in HS, they’ve been together now approaching 2 years. They too seem to be going in a life partner direction so far (it’s early yet). I know at least 10 couples who married as high school sweethearts and are still happy & together decades & several children later.
The 20 year old with 20 partners? A w h o r e to be sure. I didn’t lose my V card until 20 ffs.
Pair bonding ability also deteriorates for men who are promiscuous, it not only something that affects women. There are articles in psychological literature about that.
I know socially as acquaintances a couple of women who have slept with hundreds of men. It yuks me out and I do not closely associate with those women. Funny enough at least two who I know are now celibate in their 50s. They do not care about sex. Two others remain town bicycles and I find that gross.
The celibate 2 have never been married. The town bicycle 2 were both in 20+ year marriages and went hard core 304 post divorce. Those two are both pretty but very insecure and are both approaching 60! It’s sad honestly. These later 2 think that sex is going to capture a man. Nope. Doesn’t work that way, not with experienced men or high value men.
But I know some male player types who are perpetually spinning plates but lonely and unfulfilled too. They can’t pair bond for shjt either.
Cuts both ways.
I think it's safe to conclude, the more sexual partners you have, the probility of pair bonding goes down significantly.
I would say this effects women more than men, simply because women experience sex with a man in a different way.