Yeah agreed.
A lot of red pill and black pill guys are so focused on getting vagina that they don't make much time for male friends. In addition, 30+ red pill and black pill guys typically have mostly married guy and LTR guy friends. These friendships might have been strong at one time, but the married guy and LTR guy friends are not seeing the unattached/marginally attached single guy as much.
You are nice to say so. And it can be hard to sift through the topics to find the gold -- probably harder now than it ever has been.
I like the way you frame it. They think everything presented before them that isn't 'looks' is nothing more than a ploy or cope. They consistently deflect and place blame. On some level I feel bad for them, but if you spend time amongst them that quickly goes away.
It used to be that men had male-only spaces where they could get together. But feminism has systematically destroyed them all by forcing them to be co-ed.
I won't speak for them, but I think on some level a lot of the black pillers (not all) are generally men who are not well-endowed in the looks department and think they are doomed from the very start for this sole reason. However, unless you have a true physical disability, a man always has control over how he looks and how successful he is. The first gives him some mobility on the looks scale through sculpting his body with healthy eating (mostly) and gym (secondarily), the second gives him quite a bit of mobility both on the financial and social proof scales. A lot of things are in a man's control - but he has to accept that the biggest thing holding him back in the first place is himself. Most people can't do that. And a lot of our resident black pill posters fall into that category.
Interestingly I have also found that are outliers within their communities. Attractive men who have failed with women or more often have an intense fear of rejection and are just inexperienced. They don't try and they can easily fall into a mindset that is a slippery slope.
We're all a bit of everything i'm sure.
And that’s the point.
No dispute we are discussing hot women 18-29.
In another thread I tihnk you mentioned that looks is the most important thing for getting laid/one night stands etc, and that status and money were more important when it comes to locking down girls and relationships and stuff. I agree with that
Agree!!This forum is becoming more and more blackpill. People are using the terms normie, chadlite, and chad seriously. I sense a large amount of apathy and disillusionment in the people who use these terms. They feel that they are confined to a certain league, defined by their looks, and are condemned to stay there. Approaching becomes pointless because no girls will respond.
This mentality was not in the PUA community in its heyday. When you read Roosh, Strauss, and especially Pook, you feel excited. You hear cool stories and you get pumped to try the tactics yourself. You may have once sucked with women, but writers like those above give you a spark to take action and approach. They remind you that you will fail, but that eventually — sometime — you will succeed.
It is from this inspiration that I began my PUA journey. I was excited — though very nervous — to learn how to get girls. These guys told me how to approach. They gave me a plan for action. I came into college and started applying. I failed a ton, and didn’t work up enough confidence to approach time after time, but I had a goal in my mind so I kept going.
These OG PUA guys weren’t against improving your looks. No, not at all. Pook’s article on gaining muscle mass inspired me to lift:
What every skinny guy should know…
High rates of testosterone affects not only your actions, I believe women can sniff it out. So take a guy, stuffed with testosterone, and push him into a room full of lovely young ladies. He doesn’t speak a word. He won’t have to. The women will go to him automatically.bookofpook.com
But they didn’t tell me that I couldn’t approach if I didn’t have X muscles, Y veins, and Z height. There were no thresholds, no requirements. I just had to put the work in and eventually I would succeed. Yes, I had to improve myself as a man, but that was what I should be doing for myself anyways. I didn’t have to rate myself out of 10 every time I go out to “match” myself with an equal rating girl. Who wants to do that?
The above PUA authors helped me out greatly. I am having a blast at my college. I have two plates I bang every week now and not a year ago I hadn’t even kissed a girl. I’ve gained a good 40 pounds of muscle mass and can now bench 300 lbs max.
One of my biggest inspirations was these PUA guys, especially Pook. They have an excitement in their writing that makes you want to emulate them. It gives you a drive to see other guys’ success. You want to be like them. So you set to work, improve yourself and overcome your fears.
I just don’t see this enthusiastic mindset here much. There is much more complaining about the state of women in general, with the subtext being they are not even worth approaching anymore. Nothing is worth it, so the mentality goes.
Screw that. I don’t like this blackpill trend. Literally 99/100 guys aren’t approaching at all. They have no idea what their potential is. They don’t even know how to talk to girls, because they haven’t. I want these men to find sparks of inspiration, not endless moaning and groaning.
I tell some of my college friends my adventures with women, and they’re always amazed. Not many people do this stuff — and other guys think it’s pretty inspiring and cool. Why drive them off by being blackpill and against any sort of improvement? Instead drive them forward, to greener pastures!
I hope this blackpill trend changes and we can inspire more men through this forum.
I believe that was in a thread where a poster stated in his OP that we needed to "rate" what was most important for getting a hot woman: looks, money, social proof. I said when it came to a ONS specifically, looks would be most important of the three. Specifically because the other two almost don't matter in that very limited circumstance. This thread is more general and when it comes to long term success with women, looks are the least important. Secondly, I think lack of looks can be made up for with a confident and charismatic personality. I have seen it personally many times in my life.
Kudos with you as you dont have the looks and have a crazy numbers game through cold approach. You have allot of credibility when you say this thing works for you. Has things got more difficult now or do you think there are just more blackpill content leading to a false perception that things have got worst?
I have seen disabled white guys in wheelchair with their hot Asian women. Dont buy this true diability thing. Also the racepill is being debunked by other succeasful posters.
It's probably getting a bit harder for me I guess? It's hard to gage, mainly because I don't tend to approach quite as much as I did when I was a PUA nutter, hell-bent on reading and applying everything, and figuring out if this stuff works at all, or if it's basically marketing etc.
+1.
where does it say that the forum is only meant to discuss women under 30?
Let me clarify: In my opinion, Sosuave is for men wanting to date hot single fertile girls under 30. If the woman is 30+, fat, ugly, or single mother, a man should not need Sosuave. Anything can be discussed here (saving politics), but a man should not “need” advice here for a woman with any or all of those conditions.
