Does anyone here still want to Find a Wife?

[Barrister]

"Find a wife?" That implies signing a contract with her and the government. So it's up to you whether that works to your advantage or not.

As for marriage being the best setup for raising children, I see that repeated a lot around here, but I question the validity of this assertion. So many marriages end in divorce, that doesn't help kids. Neither does staying in an expired marriage for the kids' sake. This trope is repeated ad nauseum but it doesn't hold up to scrutiny. You won't love your kids more just because the government or church approved your relationship.

The only situation that's ideal for kids is having two parents who continue to love each other and their kids - and you don't need a contract or third party approval to do that. So ask yourself, why do you truly want to get married? Societal approval? Leftover blue pill fantasy? New passport?

A happy marriage is the best setup for children. I firmly believe that. But you are right - an unhappy marriage or even worse, a highly chaotic one, are actually worse than just raising the children in a split household. Children shouldn’t see their parents at each other’s throats. It will emotional scar them and make them more prone to repeat the same mistakes in their own relationships when they are older.

 

[Zimbabwe]

You see, you think it is noble and right to want to get married, probably to have children. But this is how it is...

The children, whether they are biologically yours or not, they are never truly 'yours'. Children belong to the state, or the society they will live in. You are mostly having and raising children for the government/society because there is no doubt that will influence them more than you. Also, after a few generations your own genetic and cultural influence on you children will mean nothing after they have married and had children themselves, after a 100s of years your impact really will amount to very little.

The nuclear family system is never about the man, it is always about the system, religion, state that it is happens within, the nuclear family is simply there to propogate that system.

Now, if you join a cult, a commune, a different religion, and then promote that system, and help to grow that system, then you are actually more likely to leave something behind that can propogate and continue.

What I'm saying is, if any mans really wants to leave a legacy, affect the world etc it is not about having a nuclear family but really changing the system, affecting politics, being part of a community etc cos those things can grow over generations and actually affect how future generations behave.

I mean its cool to get married, Im not saying dont do it, Im just saying its not really the best way to have meaning in your life, to have a legacy, or to be good and noble. At the end of the day, whats the point having children if you cant even give them anything other than to place them at the mercy of this system and these values. In that case it maybe better to try and change the system for the benefit of future children whether yours or those of others.

Most marriages ending in Divorce is largely a Western Phenomenon, that being said even in the west more and more men are becoming wiser to the situation and doing what they can to prepare. Progress will be slow but it will happen over time, we don't need to have a pessimistic doomer outlook on our society. The west has fallen several times before and each time rebuilt itself.

 

[RickTheToad]

It’s not about being “war-like.” Just prudent. You are making a commitment to this person on the basis of a relationship. This doesn’t mean you should have to financially bankrupt yourself (figuratively speaking) to her benefit if it doesn’t work out. You shouldn’t be penalized for your financial success. The prenup essentially levels the playing field legally.

S/he (no one knows if it's a he or a she) is a SJW, so it's posts are reflective of that.

 

[RickTheToad]

Most marriages ending in Divorce is largely a Western Phenomenon, that being said even in the west more and more men are becoming wiser to the situation and doing what they can to prepare. Progress will be slow but it will happen over time, we don't need to have a pessimistic doomer outlook on our society. The west has fallen several times before and each time rebuilt itself.

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As more and more people (since females are earning more) get said financial protections, people would be inclined to work on their union and not just bail because it's too tough and receive cash and prizes. My views on trusts and pre-nups are non-gender bias and level the playing field on both sides. If you take the rewards for a failed union out of it, the marriage is fine. With STDs going crazy, it is generally safer. However, there's risks that one will stray or withhold sex too. So, it's a toss-up.

 

[Solomon]

If I get married I can assure it will not be in america and nor will I be bringing the woman back
Most likely I will marry in asia or africa, a country that is divorce friendly for men
American women are in need of a spiriutal reviival

I think having children a legacy to pass unto is a think that is normal but the enivorment that modern men are in make it anti-condusive to do so

 

[BadBoy89]

The first thing I aim to do is cover all bases, look for any sort of legal loophole to protect me from having my assets stolen in the event of a divorce,

Shouldn’t you get some assets first?

 

[Zimbabwe]

You've got the whole thing mixed up. That's why you're so frustrated bro.

You don't "find" a wife. You "make" a wife. Women are like clay.

And you need a village to raise a woman. The society (village) we live in now is totally destructive to making a "wife." Even if you found yourself a church virgin you're still fvcked. She could turn into Miley Cyrus tomorrow and there's nothing you can do about it.

The main issue is there is no sense of community in the west, we are all so divided. Depending on where you go in Sydney you might feel like you are in China,Arabia or India.

Most people don't even talk to their neighbours or even try to organise community events.

As more and more people (since females are earning more) get said financial protections, people would be inclined to work on their union and not just bail because it's too tough and receive cash and prizes. My views on trusts and pre-nups are non-gender bias and level the playing field on both sides. If you take the rewards for a failed union out of it, the marriage is fine. With STDs going crazy, it is generally safer. However, there's risks that one will stray or withhold sex too. So, it's a toss-up.

Despite all the censorship on the internet more and more people continue to question how Gynocentric our society is, before it would have been unheard of for a man to ever win a custody battle but in recent years more men have managed to somehow do it.

I definitely think divorce laws need a reform, you shouldn't be able to break a contract that easily without consequences.

If I get married I can assure it will not be in america and nor will I be bringing the woman back
Most likely I will marry in asia or africa, a country that is divorce friendly for men
American women are in need of a spiriutal reviival

I think having children a legacy to pass unto is a think that is normal but the enivorment that modern men are in make it anti-condusive to do so

That being said, If a woman born and raised in the west somehow manages to resist all the corruption then that's like finding pure Gold.

Shouldn’t you get some assets first?

I live with my parents so I've been able to save up a significant amount over the years. I even made a thread on how to save money on groceries.

 

[kavi]

Most marriages ending in Divorce is largely a Western Phenomenon, that being said even in the west more and more men are becoming wiser to the situation and doing what they can to prepare. Progress will be slow but it will happen over time, we don't need to have a pessimistic doomer outlook on our society. The west has fallen several times before and each time rebuilt itself.

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OK cool, Im not arguing here but just presenting a different concept. This post is just informational, not directly related to your personal goals but something to think about in a wider sense.

What you are talking about is Patriarchy or the Nuclear Family system. This is actually not that ancient a human custom, nor is it particularly western.

What I'm saying is, the Nuclear family system is basically on its way out along with Patriarchy. What will replace it will be a system of either single parent families supported by a government or a smaller communal system.

I know alot about history and hence I am saying this. I know many here believe in 'traditional' or conservative values, so I dont want to start an argument, but I do have enough information to know that Patriarchy and Nuclear family system really are NOT the superior system for a noble, superior, moral humanity.

There is a tribe called the Mosuo who prattice a non-Patriarchal non Nuclear family based system. I am not saying this here is the ideal, but you can see docs on YT about them. They do seem pretty healthy, relaxed, decent etc more so than modern patriarchies across the world inc the west, islamic countries, mainland china etc.

 

[EyeBRollin]

It’s not about being “war-like.” Just prudent. You are making a commitment to this person on the basis of a relationship. This doesn’t mean you should have to financially bankrupt yourself (figuratively speaking) to her benefit if it doesn’t work out. You shouldn’t be penalized for your financial success. The prenup essentially levels the playing field legally.

No, it is war like. You are advocating the two parties lawyer up on opposite sides of the table going into what is a partnership mostly for the benefit of their children. It is counterproductive to advocate this with a woman you intend to share DNA with.

Hence, just don’t get married. Wife should be an asset and help, not an adversary.

 

[Zimbabwe]

Do you?

Yes but that's mostly because people on my block are on the older side, usually older folks are way more social. My parents specifically chose this area since it's safer.

I feel like most people my age have some form of social anxiety.

 

[DonJuanjr]

I feel sorry for the man who rests his financial well being on the unstable nature of females.

 

[EyeBRollin]

I feel sorry for the man who rests his financial well being on the unstable nature of females.

What exactly do you plan to do with your money when you die?

 

[Barrister]

No, it is war like. You are advocating the two parties lawyer up on opposite sides of the table going into what is a partnership mostly for the benefit of their children. It is counterproductive to advocate this with a woman you intend to share DNA with.

Hence, just don’t get married. Wife should be an asset and help, not an adversary.

You’re being very idealistic. Have you ever been married before? Over the course of many years people change. And this especially applies to women. So even if you think you have the perfect woman you can’t always bank on it remaining that way.

 

[EyeBRollin]

You’re being very idealistic. Have you ever been married before? Over the course of many years people change. And this especially applies to women. So even if you think you have the perfect woman you can’t always bank on it remaining that way.

There is no idealism here. If a man in 2022 wants a nuclear family, he is fully accepting the 50% chance of divorce. It’s either that, have a baby momma and child support, or don’t have kids at all. Take your pick.

 

[Barrister]

There is no idealism here. If a man in 2022 wants a nuclear family, he is fully accepting the 50% chance of divorce. It’s either that, have a baby momma and child support, or don’t have kids at all. Take your pick.

That’s true. But then there’s option C: the prenup.

 

[zekko]

Once I proposed to her, she miraculously did a 180 and suddenly wanted a big wedding.

I didn't realize you were getting married. Congratulations. Hope it works out for you.

 

[RickTheToad]

That’s true. But then there’s option C: the prenup.

He's a SJW. He likes to roll the dice. Let him. Hopefully, all works out fine.

 

[DonJuanjr]

He's a SJW. He likes to roll the dice. Let him. Hopefully, all works out fine.

Hopefully, but if not, I hope he has a sense of honor/integrity(which he seems like he does) and comes back on here to let the site know if it bites him in the a$$.

 

[Konada]

If you fear being divorce raped then you picked the wrong woman to begin with.

If she doesn't add value to your life or pulls her weight in the relationship, she is not wife material.

A wife is supposed to build you up and allow you to succeed more than if you have done it alone.

 

[RickTheToad]

Hopefully, but if not, I hope he has a sense of honor/integrity(which he seems like he does) and comes back on here to let the site know if it bites him in the a$$.

I'll give him that. Hopefully, I am wrong and his marriage lasts until the end with many many children and grand children.