Every Man Here Needs to Cold Approach Women

[Bokanovsky]

But how do you know this?

Let's just say I have the gift of insight and sufficient life experience living in different parts of the world.

 

[Bokanovsky]

I mean, hell, if I wanted to go through all that rejection and waste of time I could get the same results from online dating.lol
I was eating lunch with my employees the other day and the waitress kept touching my arm. I counted SEVEN times she touched my arm. Isn’t touch a sign of interest? Apparently not. She had a boyfriend when I asked for her number.lol

Studies shows that waitresses get higher tips when they touch patrons. They are well aware of this too.

 

[Robert28]

Studies shows that waitresses get higher tips when they touch patrons. They are well aware of this too.

Well sh!t I’m just gonna start touching random girls arms from now on. If they can touch me I can do the same. When I say touch, I mean she did everything from pull on my shirt lightly several times, to poke my shoulder a couple times, to putting her entire hand on my shoulder. It was a bit much, even for a desperate waitress.

 

[Zimbabwe]

Ive read books by Truth Seeker, the guy who maintains Nattyornot.com and used his history of innumerable cold approaches as inspiration in the books. I talk with him too. In short, he does not recommend cold approaching. He even said that (after his experience) he is anti-approaching.

For those of you that are anti cold approach, what is your alternative? OLD is not better for sure.

 

[SargeMaximus]

For those of you that are anti cold approach, what is your alternative? OLD is not better for sure.

It is when it's the only way I can get laid. Laid vs. not laid. Hmmm, tough choice.

 

[AttackFormation]

For those of you that are anti cold approach, what is your alternative? OLD is not better for sure.

There are no good alternatives, if you cant meet girls through social circles and have to resort to OLD/clubs/cold approach in the first place then youre already caught with the slippery soap in the prison shower.

I dont think men must stop cold approaching, but i dont think it's a solution to the problems that are systemic, especially not if it becomes mainstream - then itll be just like going to a club or OLD, probably even worse.

 

[Zimbabwe]

He has a point. I live in Spain where the country is much more driven towards social connections.

(google PUA'S in Spain and you will see this country is a nightmare )

It's hard to even break into social circles here never mind cold approaches. Luckily where I live is a high tourist place and hitting tourists or the likes is highly feasible. the locals? different approach is needed

I've met Spanish backpackers in Australia (real spanish not latinas) who complained about the men back home not being masculine enough, which is really ironic since they were kinda feminist themselves. I've heard similar things from Italian women here.

It is when it's the only way I can get laid. Laid vs. not laid. Hmmm, tough choice.

You're really limiting yourself, you could approach girls in clubs,bars,malls and the street.

There are no good alternatives, if you cant meet girls through social circles and have to resort to OLD/clubs/cold approach in the first place then youre already caught with the slippery soap in the prison shower.

I dont think men must stop cold approaching, but i dont think it's a solution to the problems that are structural to us, especially not if it becomes mainstream - then itll be just like going to a club or OLD, probably even worse.

That's the point I'm trying to make, we have guys complaining about cold approach but have no real alternative besides a social circle.

Good luck building a solid social circle outside of college, it's not going to be any easier then cold approach.

 

[SargeMaximus]

You're really limiting yourself, you could approach girls in clubs,bars,malls and the street.

Been there done that for a few YEARS. Fvck that noise.

 

[Bokanovsky]

I think that it's important not to lose sight of the fact that different things work for different people. Some enjoy cold approaching, some get good results with OLD, and some pick up girls in bars. It's important to figure out what works for you and focus on it, instead of trying to do things that work for other people. I'm not saying don't try new ways to approach but if you are not getting good results, don't waste years trying to get better at it.

 

[andreihaha]

What's even crazier is that those techniques actually used to work. As long as you approached a woman and engaged her in banter that wasn't simping, you were in with a great shot. Dudes just weren't approaching much back then. I think the advent of Tinder is when it all changed dramatically. Tinder was awesome for it's first few years. It was like Uber Eats for sex- straight to your door.

Game in 2021 versus Game in early 2000's can't be compared. The skill curve is waaaay steeper now. Early 2000's was fish in a barrel for dudes with even rudimentary redpill awareness.

I'd argue that anyone with the balls to approach in 2021 can achieve success.

But I agree that early 2000's was a lot easier.

 

[SW15]

For those of you that are anti cold approach, what is your alternative? OLD is not better for sure.

Building a social circle if possible.

I'd argue that anyone with the balls to approach in 2021 can achieve success.

But I agree that early 2000's was a lot easier.

The early to mid 2000s was easier. Almost no one wore earbuds/headphones, so there were more opportunities. No smartphones either.

 

[BadBoy89]

I was eating lunch with my employees the other day and the waitress kept touching my arm. I counted SEVEN times she touched my arm. Isn’t touch a sign of interest? Apparently not. She had a boyfriend when I asked for her number.lol

You may have done it, but generally you have to find something in common with her and then ask for the number or meet up.

”What are you doing after work? Where do you go to school? What are you studying? Oh do you like it? Do you have a boyfriend? Do you want a boyfriend? How does a pretty girl like you not have a boyfriend? Oh, you like to run? Let’s go running together. Oh you like James Bond? Let’s go see the movie together. What does that tattoo of? When did you get it? Did it hurt? Blah blah blah. Find some connection and run with it.

Again you may have done it. If not, to go straight for the number is a bit too much, even if she touched your arm 10 times.

 

[AttackFormation]

Yeah I heard that before from some of the ones that were left behind "there's no real men in Spain any more"

Spain is a weird country bro. Prostitution is practically legal her and so many men ( I refuse to say "all") see it as a right of passage. Therefor they already have the mentality that " you buy puzzy"

now this works both ways. The women know about prostitution here and contrary to the stupid beliefs here (oh legal prostitution would get women in line) WOMEN KNOW PUZZY HAS A PRIZE AND MEN HERE ARE WILLING TO PAY IT.

It's revolting from both parts. I have a cushy life here but I want out.

Where do you wanna go?

 

[roaming shark]

I agree with all of this. I have said many times that cold approaching is a difficult path.

My approach to bang ratio was probably 1 in 100 to 1 in 200. That's from doing a combination of non-bar and bar cold approaching. Because of all of this effort, I attempted to have medium term relationships from it. I didn't want to be one of those guys who gets laid 2-3 times a year from daygame and spent good portions of my weekends doing daygame approaches.

I also do not have the emotional constitution to weather that much rejection. I have done it and it is bad. I've even discussed it in therapy.

When a man is successful in this, it feels extremely satisfying in a way that can't be replicated from app swiping.

I have also actively managed my testosterone levels since the mid-2010s for the purposes of sex and cold approaching. No porn, no mbate, eating clean, and regular exercise. Even with doing those things to make myself hornier and more motivated to cold approach, I have found it difficult and not enjoyable to cold approach.

Well said. Once I understood the statistics, I really stopped going out of my way to approach. For example, I used go to a busy mall or city centre to approach. But again, when you are dealing with 1-5% to get laid, it just doesn’t make mathematical sense to dedicate hours a day. Instead, learn new skills, stay healthy, and work on your inner game. I also agree that once I realized the numbers that it slightly pushed me towards actual monogamy. We will see though.

 

[oc16]

A man sees a women on the street he likes, and goes and talks to her and has a human to human conversation, something humans have been doing for millions of years.

I've done many cold approaches in public.
Women fantasize about an alpha confident guy who comes in and sweeps them off their feet/takes them. In no women's fantasy is a guy ever saying stuff like "hey let me ask you for a female opinion, who do you think is more gay, me or Ricky Martin".

You are a man and you deserve to have a good woman in your life. Give yourself permission to find a woman attractive and be comfortable with your sexual desires. Creepy behavior comes from those who can't acknowledge social queues. If you ignore her body language or words that's when you become creepy. Brightening someone's day isn't creepy behavior. Being overtly sexual before getting to know her is creepy behavior

I've done a few cold approaches, dont remember them going too well, but I'm all for it. One time my friend and I cold approached two Hispanic women outside a bar/club and they were talking Spanish to each other during the situation. I heard the word say "pendejo" to her friend and I said to the woman "I heard what you just called me"!

 

[characternote]

My approach to bang ratio was probably 1 in 100 to 1 in 200.

I think mine was/is very similar. Despite all of my knowledge. I honestly love hearing from other people who aren't just full of **** lol.

On seddit you see so much nonsense from fantasists and/or coaches or people shilling for a coach. ''You got rejected 5 times in a row??! Bro, you're doing something seriously wrong!! You need to learn my pushpull lines and get my course on female psychology!! I get laid 1 in 3!' etc. If you told them you made 150 cold approaches and didn't get laid, they'd literally laugh you off the forum as if you're the most clueless person in the world, but the irony is that it's them that's clueless and their numbers aren't based on reality

It's a ridiculous statement on their part. I mean, imagine some old fat guy going to some victoria secret models convention. By their logic, if he's read a PUA book, if there's like twenty-five 10/10 models there, he's guaranteed to get laid! Staggering!! lol. They don't take into account the millions of factors that are out of your control. If you are not her type, it's game over. It's a numbers game. Hence the ACTUAL success rate of cold approachers.

The problem is the shady PUAs that sell them a dream, they think every approach is supposed to lead to a bang if they have enough "game".

With a few exceptions, I like that most here keep it real. You read some ludicrious claims on other forums and on discord PUA rooms etc. ''My lay count is 3000 and I pull 1 in 3 cold approaches'' etc etc. Unless you are spitting when you talk and just running the worst 'game' in the world, most rejections are completely out of your control. It is what it is. People will always sell the dream, but over time, it seems that people are becoming less naive and gullible about it all on the whole


As for the OP, I still cold approach every week. I only do night game though, personally. I've journalled hundreds of my approaches.

I don't tend to write them anymore. I stopped seeing the point. Once I eventually decided that it really is more a game of numbers than 'skill' there seemed little point. I was either setting myself up for some stupid feedback from people (in the event of a rejection) or I just felt like I was essentially bragging in the case of a pull (because i'm pretty sure a pull just means a girl thought you were good looking and you didn't creep her out and had the balls to escalate)

 

[roaming shark]

I think mine was/is very similar. Despite all of my knowledge. I honestly love hearing from other people who aren't just full of **** lol.

On seddit you see so much nonsense from fantasists and/or coaches or people shilling for a coach. ''You got rejected 5 times in a row??! Bro, you're doing something seriously wrong!! You need to learn my pushpull lines and get my course on female psychology!! I get laid 1 in 3!' etc. If you told them you made 150 cold approaches and didn't get laid, they'd literally laugh you off the forum as if you're the most clueless person in the world, but the irony is that it's them that's clueless and their numbers aren't based on reality

It's a ridiculous statement on their part. I mean, imagine some old fat guy going to some victoria secret models convention. By their logic, if he's read a PUA book, if there's like twenty-five 10/10 models there, he's guaranteed to get laid! Staggering!! lol. They don't take into account the millions of factors that are out of your control. If you are not her type, it's game over. It's a numbers game. Hence the ACTUAL success rate of cold approachers.




With a few exceptions, I like that most here keep it real. You read some ludicrious claims on other forums and on discord PUA rooms etc. ''My lay count is 3000 and I pull 1 in 3 cold approaches'' etc etc. Unless you are spitting when you talk and just running the worst 'game' in the world, most rejections are completely out of your control. It is what it is. People will always sell the dream, but over time, it seems that people are becoming less naive and gullible about it all on the whole


As for the OP, I still cold approach every week. I only do night game though, personally. I've journalled hundreds of my approaches.

I don't tend to write them anymore. I stopped seeing the point. Once I eventually decided that it really is more a game of numbers than 'skill' there seemed little point. I was either setting myself up for some stupid feedback from people (in the event of a rejection) or I just felt like I was essentially bragging in the case of a pull (because i'm pretty sure a pull just means a girl thought you were good looking and you didn't creep her out and had the balls to escalate)

What’s your success rate in night game?

 

[characternote]

What’s your success rate in night game?

I only do night game. I've not really kept 'stats' since my earlier days, but as I say it's probably somewhere around 1 lay per 150 approaches or so? I can make 20 in a night fairly easily.
I'm older, and i've never been good looking (i'm in shape but not handsome), and I tend to go exclusively for pretty 18-21 year olds which probably adds to my failure rate lol. I'm basically trying to find a lottery win each time I go out, and luckily for me, i've found a good number of them since i began cold approach some years back now.
Maybe it's worse now since i'm a little older and lost more hair since I kept them stats and i'm also only just recently getting back in the game since covid decimated the night scene in the UK

 

[B80]

I think mine was/is very similar. Despite all of my knowledge. I honestly love hearing from other people who aren't just full of **** lol.

On seddit you see so much nonsense from fantasists and/or coaches or people shilling for a coach. ''You got rejected 5 times in a row??! Bro, you're doing something seriously wrong!! You need to learn my pushpull lines and get my course on female psychology!! I get laid 1 in 3!' etc. If you told them you made 150 cold approaches and didn't get laid, they'd literally laugh you off the forum as if you're the most clueless person in the world, but the irony is that it's them that's clueless and their numbers aren't based on reality

It's a ridiculous statement on their part. I mean, imagine some old fat guy going to some victoria secret models convention. By their logic, if he's read a PUA book, if there's like twenty-five 10/10 models there, he's guaranteed to get laid! Staggering!! lol. They don't take into account the millions of factors that are out of your control. If you are not her type, it's game over. It's a numbers game. Hence the ACTUAL success rate of cold approachers.




With a few exceptions, I like that most here keep it real. You read some ludicrious claims on other forums and on discord PUA rooms etc. ''My lay count is 3000 and I pull 1 in 3 cold approaches'' etc etc. Unless you are spitting when you talk and just running the worst 'game' in the world, most rejections are completely out of your control. It is what it is. People will always sell the dream, but over time, it seems that people are becoming less naive and gullible about it all on the whole


As for the OP, I still cold approach every week. I only do night game though, personally. I've journalled hundreds of my approaches.

I don't tend to write them anymore. I stopped seeing the point. Once I eventually decided that it really is more a game of numbers than 'skill' there seemed little point. I was either setting myself up for some stupid feedback from people (in the event of a rejection) or I just felt like I was essentially bragging in the case of a pull (because i'm pretty sure a pull just means a girl thought you were good looking and you didn't creep her out and had the balls to escalate)

Sex/promise of sex sells and always will. A little like vanity and weight lifting. Plenty of gurus selling the dream of perfect physiques to young men. 'Just buy this tub of protein and a load of random supps and you'll look like me in no time!'. Obviously they don;t disclose the real 'supplements' that built their body of a greek god.

Most people realize this after some time, but the people making money are usually hanging around the gateways and spending money on advertising to take advantage of constant flow of newbies.

 

[roaming shark]

I only do night game. I've not really kept 'stats' since my earlier days, but as I say it's probably somewhere around 1 lay per 150 approaches or so? I can make 20 in a night fairly easily.
I'm older, and i've never been good looking (i'm in shape but not handsome), and I tend to go exclusively for pretty 18-21 year olds which probably adds to my failure rate lol. I'm basically trying to find a lottery win each time I go out, and luckily for me, i've found a good number of them since i began cold approach some years back now.
Maybe it's worse now since i'm a little older and lost more hair since I kept them stats and i'm also only just recently getting back in the game since covid decimated the night scene in the UK

With numbers like that, does it even make sense to go to bars to meet women? I’m not being negative or black pill, just asking from a pure mathematical perspective. It appears to me that it may not be worth the time and money to go out...