Advice from the old lady:
Of course looks matter. But they aren’t everything. As
@Atom Smasher pointed out women evaluate men as a whole package.
Women have differing priorities too. Some women want financial resources as top priority, some want intelligence, some want sex appeal, some want bad boyness etc.
Looks are but one factor in a multivariate equation. Men are simple. Is she hot in his opinion. That is criteria numero uno. Beyond that other things do matter but physical attractiveness is head & shoulders above the rest.
I think @DashRiprock made some good points but many hot women do not date down in looks. If anything, historically I have dated at or above my own level (I agree propensity to wander is higher in men with top tier looks due to ridiculous abundance of opportunity), but a confident woman will manage that.
Dating top status men is not for the insecure. But then all but top status men tend to pedestalize or be intimidated by beautiful top tier women...water always seeks its own level gentlemen.
By another handle
@stormrider used to point out that once you are in the top tier strata people who have LMS are a given. From there you are choosing along the lines of personal preferences between prequalified (for lack of a better way to put it) people who all have much to offer.
That doesn’t really help the dude who wears sneakers, cargo shorts and untucked t shirts over a dad bod belly who plays video games instead of being (learning how to be) socially adroit. That guy has to get a good haircut, learn to dress, and leave his house besides to greet the pizza delivery guy.
Some men need to start at the very very beginning because they are still thinking & acting like a 14 year old in their mid 30s.
There’s a guy exactly like I described above who rents a house from a friend of mine. She hosted a cookout several weeks ago and the dude attended. He could make himself attractive if he dressed better, got a better haircut, walked a bit to exercise & learned social cues. He’s an IT whiz who works from (and almost never leaves) home. He’s plenty smart & a decent conversationalist...but he’s the 14 year old in the mid 30s body. Women don’t want to deal with that. I certainly won’t.
So it’s more a total package thing with women.
I for one don’t really find gym muscle hard bodies all that attractive. I don’t like trying to snuggle with a box of rocks. Fit? Yes. Not overweight, no beer bellies. But too rock hard with the muscles at rest? Pass.