Is this normal behavior or just attention whoring?

[sangheilios]

They aren't wired like us, brother. We think differently, love differently, & more often than not behave like adults instead of children. I once heard someone say that if you want to learn how to deal with women, you should read books on parenting because they act like little ****ing kids.
Validation to a woman is like air that we breathe. One person giving them their all will never be good enough- because their childlike minds will always question if something better is on the horizon. We live in a day where a 50yr old woman who has a busted ass face but huge fake cans can acquire 500k followers on an app with majority of them being undersexed betas praising the floor she walks on. You could be Christ himself, but she'll always want more. Im beginning to learn that it's just better to take off the second a chick starts with the childish bull****..if I wanted a kid, I'd adopt one. I think we're all sick of the **** & that's why many of us are here. We still want to get laid, but we're always trying to learn new ways to keep ourselves grounded & in check. In many ways were nothing more than rags that they will ring til there's nothing left & then head for greener pastures. If a chick puts the ego aside & has cultivated some sense of sensibility, she's probably worth keeping around..but most are just not worth the headache.

Honestly, I feel like all the good ones do get taken early on. If a woman is attractive and of good character she will be in a steady relationship by the time she is in her mid 20s. Past this unless she is of very smv there is a reason why she is single.

Also, 70% of adult Americans are overweight or obese, so if you are fit and looking for someone similar good luck finding a woman like that who is also single.

 

[HughJasolphd]

Honestly, I feel like all the good ones do get taken early on. If a woman is attractive and of good character she will be in a steady relationship by the time she is in her mid 20s. Past this unless she is of very smv there is a reason why she is single.

Also, 70% of adult Americans are overweight or obese, so if you are fit and looking for someone similar good luck finding a woman like that who is also single.

I live in South FL (about 30min from Miami) so finding a chick who's in shape is actually really easy- but finding one who doesn't have the personality of a plastic bag & is actually enjoyable to be around is about as challenging as defusing a bomb lol

 

[logicallefty]

Read my thread about the nurse I'm trying to ****. I get a strong vibe that she just wants to string me along for attention purposes. I'm shutting that down. These chicks don't give a damn about you bro, they'll flirt like they want it but are all bark if they just want a little boost. Gotta slam it shut before they really think they can walk you like a dog.

If a girl tells me she has a boyfriend I ask for his name & when she gives it I'll purposely get it wrong to have fun while leaving the interaction
Girl:I have a boyfriend
Me: Oh yea? What's his name?
Girl: Derek
Me: Lucky guy! I'm sure Deangelo is the consummate gentleman
Girl: I said his name is Derek
Me: Yea, I know. Best to you & Dante (walks away smiling)

It makes me feel a lot less bad about it not going in my favor, & most of the time they look confused at the end of it all which always makes me laugh lol

I like toying with them with the BFs too. I will ask her a few genuine questions about him and then say “He sounds like a decent guy. Let me know when things end with you and him, he can be my wingman”

 

[sangheilios]

I live in South FL (about 30min from Miami) so finding a chick who's in shape is actually really easy- but finding one who doesn't have the personality of a plastic bag & is actually enjoyable to be around is about as challenging as defusing a bomb lol

That's the point though lol. The girls that are single and attractive are going to be so bombarded with male attention that they don't need to have much of a personality. These women will be younger and not looking for a relationship but settle down vy their mid 20s or so. I'm 28, almost every woman that I know of is in a relationship.

 

[HughJasolphd]

That's the point though lol. The girls that are single and attractive are going to be so bombarded with male attention that they don't need to have much of a personality. These women will be younger and not looking for a relationship but settle down vy their mid 20s or so. I'm 28, almost every woman that I know of is in a relationship.

Florida is a mixed bag: most of the girls I know in relationships cheat on their guy..but the guy isn't faithful either so it balances out..but they stay together because "they're afraid to be alone" (****ing morons). The single girls are usually party rats/Instagram sluts who club 6 nights a seek & do Coke or Molly...when 30 comes around, let's just say the wall isn't going to be hit gently & unbelievable panic will set in. I absolutely love the Boca area down here because the older women are fantastic in that area..most are fake titted married women who hate their husbands, are addicted to Xanax & red wine & want nothing more than a young man to **** them when their husband is at work lmao

 

[sangheilios]

Florida is a mixed bag: most of the girls I know in relationships cheat on their guy..but the guy isn't faithful either so it balances out..but they stay together because "they're afraid to be alone" (****ing morons). The single girls are usually party rats/Instagram sluts who club 6 nights a seek & do Coke or Molly...when 30 comes around, let's just say the wall isn't going to be hit gently & unbelievable panic will set in. I absolutely love the Boca area down here because the older women are fantastic in that area..most are fake titted married women who hate their husbands, are addicted to Xanax & red wine & want nothing more than a young man to **** them when their husband is at work lmao

The fear of being alone and staying in relationships that are long expired is actually pretty common. I know of a few people who pretend to be in these perfect relationships but in reality at least one of them or even both individuals actively cheat on the other who is fully aware of what is going on. They create this fake perfect life image on their social media for what purpose I don't even know, I almost feel bad for these people when they go well past their prime years.

Club rats and instagram *****s are a whole different breed that I don't quite understand. I think a lot of these women are just insanely insecure and use this as a means to feel better about themselves. I met an instagram attention ***** earlier this year and I remember she made,some comment about wishing she could be as confident as this older guy tha goes to our gym. I was kind of confused but then it made sense, she has a low sense of self worth and dresses provocatively and is an attention seeker to help make her feel more confident.

 

[longtail]

It is confusing to me because no normal person would behave in such a manner unless they were possibly reconsidering that guy. I realize that it is all for attention but I just don't see why someone would go through all that just for validation. This has happened several times to me and I initially dismiss their behavior because I don't want to just assume that one girl is the exact same as the previous one. It is hard for me to deal with this beause I would never behave like that and expect others to be the same. I'm not in high school, and neither are these women, but the manner in which they behave makes me feel like that type of energy. Mind you, these women are older, youngest was 22 and I had one who was 28 acting like this.

I'm curious about how logicallefty views this thread.

All I see is endless whining by this guy about how evil and flaky women are and that therefore dating is impossible. BigDave17 attention horing all over again which is detrimental to the forum because of the whining, negativity and circular, repetitive nature of the posts.

 

[AttackFormation]

Florida is a mixed bag: most of the girls I know in relationships cheat on their guy..but the guy isn't faithful either so it balances out..but they stay together because "they're afraid to be alone" (****ing morons).

What pathetic lives, lol... I bet these are the same people who are Facebook-happy.

I absolutely love the Boca area down here because the older women are fantastic in that area..most are fake titted married women who hate their husbands, are addicted to Xanax & red wine & want nothing more than a young man to **** them when their husband is at work lmao

Lmao, hahahahaha...! loving your descriptions. Fake titted wives who hate their husbands, are addicted to Xanax and red wine and want you to fvck them while their husband is at work, LOL...

 

[logicallefty]

I'm curious about how logicallefty views this thread.

All I see is endless whining by this guy about how evil and flaky women are and that therefore dating is impossible. BigDave17 attention horing all over again which is detrimental to the forum because of the whining, negativity and circular, repetitive nature of the posts.

I don't see any problem with this thread or any alleged whining or actual 'whining' on the forum. Whining is not against the forum rules. I realize that everyone on SoSuave is at different stages of their lives, their journeys to become better men, figure more out about women, etc. Even the guys who ask the same repeated questions 10, 20+ times and never listen to anyone's advice; sure I may get annoyed by it from time to time like anyone else. But I will never be compelled to attack them for doing it. If someone really annoyed me that bad and I wasn't a moderator I would just use the 'ignore' button on them and then I'd never see any of their posts ever again. Pretty simple really.

 

[HughJasolphd]

The fear of being alone and staying in relationships that are long expired is actually pretty common. I know of a few people who pretend to be in these perfect relationships but in reality at least one of them or even both individuals actively cheat on the other who is fully aware of what is going on. They create this fake perfect life image on their social media for what purpose I don't even know, I almost feel bad for these people when they go well past their prime years.

Club rats and instagram *****s are a whole different breed that I don't quite understand. I think a lot of these women are just insanely insecure and use this as a means to feel better about themselves. I met an instagram attention ***** earlier this year and I remember she made,some comment about wishing she could be as confident as this older guy tha goes to our gym. I was kind of confused but then it made sense, she has a low sense of self worth and dresses provocatively and is an attention seeker to help make her feel more confident.

It's kinda sad that the ig attention chicks have such low self esteem..they make a guy with low self worth look like he's king sh!t a lot of the time. They're so critical on themselves to upkeep this virtual facade..it must be exhausting to some degree. I heard a documentary was released on Netflix about this exact topic..I may have to watch it.

 

[AttackFormation]

It's kinda sad that the ig attention chicks have such low self esteem..they make a guy with low self worth look like he's king sh!t a lot of the time. They're so critical on themselves to upkeep this virtual facade..it must be exhausting to some degree. I heard a documentary was released on Netflix about this exact topic..I may have to watch it.

What boggles my mind about them the most is their sheer ignorance, or I guess it's some pathology because it really doesn't make sense otherwise. You'll see them either complain that they basically get used as a *** receptacle, or that they're not looking for sex. It's these same girls who could fit their voluntary pictures into a playboy magazine, who complain about men and dating. These girls have to be complete mental wrecks.

By the way, what tended to be why those women hate their husbands?

 

[HughJasolphd]

What boggles my mind about them the most is their sheer ignorance, or I guess it's some pathology because it really doesn't make sense otherwise. You'll see them either complain that they basically get used as a *** receptacle, or that they're not looking for sex. It's these same girls who could fit their voluntary pictures into a playboy magazine, who complain about men and dating. These girls have to be complete mental wrecks.

By the way, what tended to be why those women hate their husbands?

The Boca cougar chicks?

Well, they a lot of em are just with a man for money since it's a super wealthy area..these are women who drive maseratis, wear thousands in jewelry & have Botox, tits, & wear yoga pants 24/7. They hate their husbands because they are old & probably impotent...homeboy has to prepare all week to give her 3 minutes of mediocre sex & frankly they don't like it. They must miss the days where they were in high school & they'd be ravaged by some young horny bastard who's harder than a school desk at the mere sight of her. I personally love the whole cougar thing, maybe it's because it feels like it's a porn fantasy or something..but they absolutely love the young guys in shape. You don't even have to spit good game because most of them lived in the days of the Atari being space age technology...so none of them know how to use social media other than using Facebook to repost videos of Whitesnake & Poison music videos to remind them of their glory days. You just gotta tell her she's beautiful & want an experienced woman to make feel young again...if she's able to get wet still, she will & you'll be good to go lmao

 

[longtail]

Is it normal for a woman to reject you but then continue to encourage you to pursue her? I've made approaches and get the bf line without fail but then they'll encourage me by later approaching, making eye contact, etc. They then wonder why I make a move again later on and then start distancing themselves, as if they were totally oblivious as to what they were doing. Is this **** normal because it is so confusing to me. I make a move, you say no.....why are you going completely out of your way to lead me on?

I don't know if it is me but I seem to constantly attract these types of female trolls into my life. Each time is a bit different but it all plays out the same. Also, these are women I have only spoken to one or two times for a few minutes before asking for their number and not people I have been speaking to for a while before making a move.

You're wasting your time trying to psychoanalyze these chicks. Good luck with that. You'll drive yourself mad and be in an even worse spot after trying.

If she annoys you, ignore her full stop. She will go away. DON'T WASTE A SECOND FURTHER THINKING ABOUT THESE TYPES OF GIRLS. THINK INSTEAD OF YOUR NEW GAME PLAN FOR FVCKING CHICKS. THEN, IMPLEMENT IT.

As far as actually getting laid, getting a girlfriend, getting married, or whatever the fvck your goal is, you have to take ACTION.

I've done a few gym approaches. They generally go nowhere. And women come on to me at the gym. I've approached women at the gym. Generally speaking, both men and women want to exercise at the gym, not date. That doesn't make women "b1tchy" or "flaky" or "attention hors" it just means meeting someone is not their priority at the gym.

Go to places where people go to socialize or date. Try online dating. If you can get a date or a lay by meeting someone at the gym, great, but that's not generally why people go to the gym.

As I've said many times before, this thread is counter-productive for you. Here's what's actionable:

1. ignore the girls who annoy you at the gym

2. go to places where people want to find someone to date or hookup: parties, clubs, bars, happy hours, networking events.

3. try online dating. This is an area for guys like Amante and others. Getting a photographer, professional shoot, working hard on instagram etc.

4. approach girls

5. screen for girls who are willing to leave with you that night. At the very least, get contact info. It probably won't lead anywhere, but so what, it's still a good idea to be in the habit of getting contact info.

6. EXPECT A SH1TLOAD OF FLAKES, LMR, GHOSTING, GIRLS TOOLING YOU, LEADING YOU ON, ETC. IT'S ALL NORMAL AND PART OF THE GAME. YOU MUST PERSIST THROUGH ALL OF THIS BY GOING AFTER GIRLS WHO DO SHOW INTEREST. DON'T GET DISCOURAGED. TAKE ACTION AND PERSIST.

 

[longtail]

The fear of being alone and staying in relationships that are long expired is actually pretty common. I know of a few people who pretend to be in these perfect relationships but in reality at least one of them or even both individuals actively cheat on the other who is fully aware of what is going on. They create this fake perfect life image on their social media for what purpose I don't even know, I almost feel bad for these people when they go well past their prime years.

Club rats and instagram *****s are a whole different breed that I don't quite understand. I think a lot of these women are just insanely insecure and use this as a means to feel better about themselves. I met an instagram attention ***** earlier this year and I remember she made,some comment about wishing she could be as confident as this older guy tha goes to our gym. I was kind of confused but then it made sense, she has a low sense of self worth and dresses provocatively and is an attention seeker to help make her feel more confident.

Again, your mental masturbation/non-stop psychoanalysis is leading you to dig an even deeper hole for yourself.

You make a half assed attempt to approach a few girls, it goes nowhere, and now these women are "hoodrats" and instagram hors. This mentality will only discourage you even further, meaning you will take even less action, meaning ZERO results, and even more ex post facto rationalization that women are "hoodrats" and "instagram hoes."

Now you're even worse off than where you started, and you started from a sh1tty position.

STOP PSYCHOANALYZING AND MENTALLY MASTURBATING. TAKE ACTION.

AGAIN, STOP MENTALLY MASTURBATING. STOP WITH THE EXCUSES. STOP WHINING. TAKE ACTION.

 

[Chi Town]

There toying with you, I don't know what world you been living in but this is normal chick behavior, hell guys do it to, I've done it myself.

Happens to everyone sometimes.

The difference is, the top tier guys don't give 2 fvcks worrying about it.

 

[marmel75]

What is the benefit to doing that though? Why approach me after rejecting me and encourage this? I have already posted other threads but I even had some of them ask me out on a date, give me their numbers just to flake and later ghost but then reappear and try to act like nothing happened.

Do you just ignore these *****s and treat them like dirt or what?

Ever see how cats play with mice before killing them? Same concept. Its fun for her.

You are the mouse, she is the cat...when she gets tired of toying with you she nukes you

 

[longtail]

Ever see how cats play with mice before killing them? Same concept. Its fun for her.

You are the mouse, she is the cat...when she gets tired of toying with you she nukes you

Again, self-defeating, counter-productive pseudo-analyses.

Bullsh1t analysis leads to cynicism. Cynicism leads to passivity. Passivity leads to zero results. Zero results leads to even more cynicism, now you are unwilling to even try.

You have a loser mindset.

 

[flowtheory]

Is it normal for a woman to reject you but then continue to encourage you to pursue her? I've made approaches and get the bf line without fail but then they'll encourage me by later approaching, making eye contact, etc. They then wonder why I make a move again later on and then start distancing themselves, as if they were totally oblivious as to what they were doing. Is this **** normal because it is so confusing to me. I make a move, you say no.....why are you going completely out of your way to lead me on?

I don't know if it is me but I seem to constantly attract these types of female trolls into my life. Each time is a bit different but it all plays out the same. Also, these are women I have only spoken to one or two times for a few minutes before asking for their number and not people I have been speaking to for a while before making a move.

You fall right in to the potential orbiter role; because you’re choosing to. You don’t value your own time and who you give attention to.

Talk to the woman, once engaged ask her out. If she gives you anything but a yes or a different date, it’s done. No more time and attention until she suggests something.

Who cares what women are up to in the beginning stages such as this? Unless you’re intimate and dating nothing matters. You’re getting hung up on time wasters and it’s causing you to be annoyed as second guess your value.
K

Keep nexting until you find someone who wants to progress in the same direction as you. Keep your head about it and don’t think it reflects something about you. keep reading DJ bible and lurking. Assert your value and don’t forget you are valuable.

 

[marmel75]

Again, self-defeating, counter-productive pseudo-analyses.

Bullsh1t analysis leads to cynicism. Cynicism leads to passivity. Passivity leads to zero results. Zero results leads to even more cynicism, now you are unwilling to even try.

You have a loser mindset.

Lmao

 

[sangheilios]

You fall right in to the potential orbiter role; because you’re choosing to. You don’t value your own time and who you give attention to.

Talk to the woman, once engaged ask her out. If she gives you anything but a yes or a different date, it’s done. No more time and attention until she suggests something.

Who cares what women are up to in the beginning stages such as this? Unless you’re intimate and dating nothing matters. You’re getting hung up on time wasters and it’s causing you to be annoyed as second guess your value.
K

Keep nexting until you find someone who wants to progress in the same direction as you. Keep your head about it and don’t think it reflects something about you. keep reading DJ bible and lurking. Assert your value and don’t forget you are valuable.

This isn't currently happening now but these women would literally go out of their way to approach me after all this. A couple months ago there was a girl at my gym who asked me out on a date that night but later flaked and ghosted. She reappeared through text and in person at the gym took my hand and placed it on her thigh. She flaked a second time which was when I asked her if she was seeing someone, which she said she wasn't. A week after that she started approaching me again but at that point I just kept it friendly. I don't talk to her anymore but that is what I get for the most part.

The other problem is I'm just genuinely not attracted to the vast majority of women. I'm fit and in shape so when 70% of adults are overweight or obese the pickings are slim. Most of the ones that are attractive are taken, so I have a mindset of scarcity because I know there just isn't much out there. Hell, I have tried dating sites and apps and was absolutely appalled at the quality of women on there and genuinely concerned, there just isn't much out there.