I actually agree with this. All women naturally have this within them, to seek out to control men indirectly. But it is accentuated with BPDs.
You know, it's interesting you say all this and it furthers my belief that BPD is really just the female version of a sociopath. But I still do wonder why (like a sociopath) you say that they are barely conscious. And is there any way to actually 'wake them up', so to speak?
As for your assertion that they prey on the weaknesses of men, well in the case of the one I was with for only 3 months before we had a little ultimatum, I have an insecurity of weakness. I've realized this. Weakness bothers me a LOT. Kinda funny how that's my insecurity because having one in the first place is what irritates me. But the thing is, she couldn't prey on that because I was too strong for her to control. She couldn't detect that it was weakness either for whatever reason. And like that one other poster above said, it is all about control. That's why we she left. When she thought she had a LITTLE bit of control over me (keyword: thought. Only because her friend said something about me that wasn't true), she tried to use it right away. But I wasn't having it. Maybe because of this insecurity of mine. But I didn't eat burned because I remained strong regardless of what she or anyone else said or did to me. I did it for myself rather than because I 'wanted to keep her' or any of that garbage. All I thought when it was over was 'that ***** was crazy' and 'hell yeah I survived crazy like it was nothing' lol. They really aren't all that bad. You just can't be an idiot with you're heart despite any 'insecurities'.
Not that bad?
Only 3 months?
They are damaging into the fact that these traits are hidden for a long time until you are bonded. Once you decide you 2 will be life partners. Then it comes out. Your lover, best friend who has been nice and supportive all of a sudden demeans you and talks to you so cruelly you can't belive it, you are in shock.
If a strangerof 3 months acted like this i would say goodbyes, but this is no stranger.
Mine stayed with me 4 days a week for 6 months about 10 months into the rela. At 18 months in all a sudden she turned Moody, bossy, controlling and mean as chit. if I woke her up to pee she would make cruel remarks and be ****ty , degrading, even tho she woke me up to pee and that was ok.
All a sudden she would get stressed out over the littlest thing and go to bed at 5pm for the day, but would come out to scold me for walking across the house, or opening the front door to let the dog out where she could hear me, punishing me with cruel remarks and the silent treatment.
My son and i started walking on egg shells, almost litetally at 7pm.
This chit never happened b4 now all these mood swings were coming more and more often.
I told her, this is my home I'm not gonna be punished to walk around it at 6pm, stop being mean or go home.
So that was a fight then she would follow thro for a month and back to the same ol moody remarks.
She would storm around my house woth negativity and a cloud of horror.
CONTROLLING beyond belief.
She never went to church yet wanted me to leave my church of 35 years to find a new one w her and was furious and punished me when i didnt.
I have a nice home but she didnt "choose it" so she wanted me to sell out snd downgrade for a home of her choosing i said no and she punished me for it by treating me horribly.
See she didn't have money to add to an upgraded home, her decifit, yet wanted to control where we lived so would instead downgrade than to live in my house because a psycho control freak.
I have 100 more stories and examples