That kid I mentioned went and dropped off a book at her front door with a love note inside to call him. He drove by the next day to notice she hasn't been home. Dude called me crying non stop, wants her back, his mind is tricking him in thinking he can not only get her back, but get the "love bombing" version of her back. No matter how many times I tell him not to make contact, he doesn't listen. He wants her to destroy him, he wants to have a heart attack and die as he said he cannot live in the mental prison he is in anymore.
I get it, I almost committed suicide twice since after my ex moved, had a panic attack so severe it almost took my life. I've come to except the fact she will haunt me forever and no relationship will ever compare to what her and I had. To the point I dont even want to deal with women anymore. On top of her giving me an STI, makes moving on seem impossible. It's like im programmed to not really be attracted nor want any other girl but her. Its crazy once that switch in their mind shut off, you are now their enemy more than likely forever, they paint you black.
Seems like he's fighting two personalities. One, where he thinks in his mind he can and will be back with her, the other, he knows she's sick and not worth pursuing. But either way he loves her with all his heart and he will not accept trying to get her back even if it destroys him. He's been having a lot of medical problems too as a result from all the pain, crying, overthinking, nightmares, sleepless nights.
He admitted he fell in love with her kids too and they became a huge part of his life. Whats crazy about his situation is that his relationship was 1.5 years on the phone/video chat and two months physical and 2 months pysical. Weird seeing she lived 20 mins away and took over a year to meet in person. They met on POF, but he had fake pics of a good looking guy not his own. Took him 4 months of being loved bombed to admit the pics weren't even him. She still accepted him and forgave him. So he was loved bombed that entire time on the phone. In person, it only lasted two months. She broke up with him and left like nothing happened when just a day before she was begging him to get her pregnant. He kept calling her out on her disrespectful and rude behavior. He was smart in the fact he didn't fall for her games. She begged him not to use a condom and to also get her pregnant, but he wouldn't cave in. I know she left him cause he couldn't be controlled and was on to her BS mind games. We all know Npd's Bpd's and Hpd's need to be in control, once you start calling them out on their BS behavior, they usually bail.
I know what you mean man, I lost my BF of two years. Im Cluster B myself and look back to see how similar her and I were. I have some psychopath traits and also lack empathy at times, but I would never intentionally break someones heart ,knowingly give them an STD like she did to me, cheat or manipulate a person. Like you said, no contact is and always will be the only way to heal. Even looking at pics of them is considered breaking NC.