My Date With A Gold Digger

[taiyuu_otoko]

Look on the bright side, at least she was upfront and honest about what she wanted. It'd be much worse if she only pretended to be "equal opportunity" to reel you in before showing her true colors.

You should thank her.

In fact, you could treat this as a "story" experience to sort girls for future dates.

"Man, dating is crazy, but I got respect for some ladies. I mean some girls are fake for a LONG time before they show their true colors. But this one girl told me after the first date she ONLY wanted a guy with money, which is cool, I hate girls who either don't know what they want or pretend they want something but really want something else. I gotta respect people who are honest and upfront, so you know right away if this is going to work out, right? So, what are you all about?"

 

[soulforge]

I would not have actually minded if she had at least offered to pay for one drink.. but she made no offer

in fact she tried to make me feel like I was not a "gentleman" because I would not pay for ALL her drinks lol

her default position was, the guy pays for EVERYTHING

should I message her and set her straight with some reality??

 

[AJ84]

I'd disagree with everyone supporting you and telling you she's a b!tch.

Firstly, assuming you were leading, you asked her out, bought her a drink and took her to a bar.

Secondly, you set the frame of the interaction and venue, refusing to pay for drinks was similar to her refusing you sex after she took you to the bedroom.

You shouldn't have cared about the money and offered to pay even if she insisted otherwise because you were leading.

The only time I tell a woman to pay is when she leads and hints she's thirsty, I tell her "Me too, buy me a drink" with a sly smile.

Calling her a "gold digger" who wants a "beta faggot" in this situation is similar to her thinking you are "sex crazed fiend" who wants a "wh0re" if she took you to the bedroom and refused sex.

The blue pill runs deep in this forum.

"After the date she messages me this..

HER - I like you, but I am not an equal opportunities kind of girl.. i want to be looked after, all the best..

That's why she's a gold digger. Or at the very least expects him to pay for her. She basically told him what she expects so regardless of whether he should of bought all her drinks on their first date, clearly she would of expected him to pay for all of their dates and who knows what else because she wants to be looked after.
When a hot girl with tells a guy she wants to be looked after, that usually means more than buying drinks. Red flag for any guy who is not interested in paying someone's rent and car payments.

 

[AJ84]

I would not have actually minded if she had at least offered to pay for one drink.. but she made no offer

in fact she tried to make me feel like I was not a "gentleman" because I would not pay for ALL her drinks lol

her default position was, the guy pays for EVERYTHING

should I message her and set her straight with some reality??

Texting her back sends the message to her that she got to you. It implies that your are interested enough in her to engage via text to justify your behaviour. Forgetting about her and moving on shows her that she is not worth your time to justify not buying her drinks all night.

 

[soulforge]

Texting her back sends the message to her that she got to you. It implies that your are interested enough in her to engage via text to justify your behaviour. Forgetting about her and moving on shows her that she is not worth your time to justify not buying her drinks all night.

I agree man.. logically this makes a whole lot of sense..especially if it is after a few dates, weeks or months

but after just one date..sometimes setting these things straight with these greedy bi@ches is worth while the satisfaction.

 

[Thorninmyside]

She probably blocked the number after sending you the message. It's not like she was opening up a dialogue about the situation.

 

[Von]

I agree man.. logically this makes a whole lot of sense..especially if it is after a few dates, weeks or months

but after just one date..sometimes setting these things straight with these greedy bi@ches is worth while the satisfaction.

Lol just let it go...

She was a good girl who was straight forward with you.

She respect you enough to tell you the truth.

So you saved time and money and can either next or try to gold dig...

After that text she likely forgot you existed.

So dont act bêta and hurt... either reply : Thanks for saving us time or never reply and move on (go with option 2)

 

[bigneil]

Ok so been on a date tonight with a hb8
Damn this girl was HOT crazy sexy body
Girl was hot..but I aint a fool either!

She wasn't a gold digger, she just knows her eggs are worth more than $0.00.

That makeup and hair and outfit cost something also. Her eating healthy food to stay beautiful costs something. Her paying her rent so she doesn't have to live with a pimp cost something.

The man pays for the date. You want her to risk getting pregnant? What's in it for her? Women don't trade sex for sex, they always have some ulterior motive. Sex is a means to an end for women. You need to give her the best value.

 

[sazc]

A woman that is truly interested in getting to know YOU isn't going to "require" that you pay for anything, especially on the first date.
This is a good testament to the fact that a female can be seated to see you again, even tho her interest level is zero, simply for the free meal and drinks. Shoot, they're are a bunch of really pretty females who will stick around for a very long time, "dating" you, and having sex with you, as long as you don't try to monopolize too much of their time, so they can continue to date around looking for someone better.

Be grateful that she revealed herself early, some guys aren't so lucky and they spend loads of time and money being taken advantage of.

 

[The Duke]

If you like paying for girls then this is your type. She's a personal trainer....most struggle to work 40hrs per week and are broke. If she is hot she is used to men bankrolling everything for her. You aren't going to be that guy and you stood up for what you believed in...good for you.

 

[zekko]

should I message her and set her straight with some reality??

I agree with the others who said no response is the best response. Nothing you say is going to speak louder than that.

 

[bigneil]

Shoot, they're are a bunch of really pretty females who will stick around for a very long time, "dating" you, and having sex with you, as long as you don't try to monopolize too much of their time, so they can continue to date around looking for someone better.

• sazc just gave the definition of dating.
• As if any woman (or man) ever stops "looking for someone better".
• 51% of women who cheat do so with someone they met at work - make them work less and they will be more faithful.
  
• 65% of marriages end in divorce, and sazc tells us about how women are just so devoted if they are unicorns.
• There are lots of women who will go out with a man just for his company. The vast majority are overweight and over 40.
• "Pay what things are worth" - 48 Laws of Power
• "Dating is an exchange of eggs for resources" - Stefan Molyneux
• "The man pays for the date" - Louis and Copeland "How to Succeed with Women" 2000.

 

[soulforge]

She wasn't a gold digger, she just knows her eggs are worth more than $0.00.

That makeup and hair and outfit cost something also. Her eating healthy food to stay beautiful costs something. Her paying her rent so she doesn't have to live with a pimp cost something.

The man pays for the date. You want her to risk getting pregnant? What's in it for her? Women don't trade sex for sex, they always have some ulterior motive. Sex is a means to an end for women. You need to give her the best value.

I don't buy into this at all..

When I go out on a date, I am not only looking at if she has a great pair of tittie's..

I am also looking at her character.. If she is of good character.. or she is a devious hoe!

I offered to buy this girl a drink when we first met, we then went back to the bar for a second drink, again she was expecting me to pay.. I told her I would get the next round.

her reposnse - YOU DON'T EXPECT A LADY TO PAY FOR DRINKS DO YOU

I later bought her another round of drinks..


She also filled me in about a date she had with this dude, only 2 weeks ago.. They met at a bar, had some drinks.. he drove quite a long way to meet her..

after the date, she told him, that HE WAS NOT HER TYPE.. so according to this chick, he got pretty angry with her, and starting getting a little crazy!

I can BET YOUR last dollar, that dude paid for all her drinks that night...

Just an offer to by a round is appreciated, but to have a default position that THE GUY MUST PAY FOR EVERYTHING is a fukin joke!

Also consider the reason she gave me, for not meeting me again?

I AM NOT AN EQUALITY TYPE OF GIRL, I WANT A MAN TO LOOK AFTER ME..

this translates as, I am looking for a man, who will pay for all my chit, just because I have a vagina..

 

[bigneil]

I AM NOT AN EQUALITY TYPE OF GIRL, I WANT A MAN TO LOOK AFTER ME..
this translates as, I am looking for a man, who will pay for all my chit, just because I have a vagina..

My grandmother was married as a virgin, only slept with one man, had 8 kids and went to church every Sunday.

She told me in 2008 "Women aren't gold diggers just because they want you to pay for dinner. A woman is looking for a man who can support a family".

Those "titties" OP is checking out are designed to feed children, which arouses men who seek fertility. Women are specifically designed to have kids. When you take her out to court her, you are trying to demonstrate that you are a reliable man who won't get her pregnant and leave her. That is the fundamental, underlying ritual at play - eggs for resources. Women want to say "Look what great resources my eggs got me!".

If a man is extremely attractive and/or she is extremely horny, she might use him for sex. Chances are she wants more than sex from him.

Gold digging is when they leave a guy with 2 boats for a guy with 3 boats.

 

[Atom Smasher]

A lot of you guys need to get out of the "she should pay something" mindset. I've been saying this for years. The way it works is this:

The man invites the girl out. The man pays. They dynamics of this have been amply detailed by darksprezzaruta and bigneil above. Asking her to pay is a huge turnoff to women, and rightly so. Your end of the deal is paying for drinks/dinner/whatever. This is the beginning of her deciding to SUBMIT to you. The one who is being paid for is the submissive one. This is just the beginning. Her end of the deal (as time moves forward) is to submit to you and to take care of you in feminine ways (usually having to do with domestic practicalities and sex).

When it comes to relationships, there is no such thing as "50/50". The process involves the male establishing provision and protection, and the female, submitting and offering her body sexually and providing domestic and personal care. That dynamic is rooted deep within the core of every human.

If both make the same amount of money, future financial compromises can be made, but in the opening volley, get the idea of her paying out of your head completely. Get the idea of "fairness" out of your head. Instead, work with the machine (system) as it is. If you don't, you come off as a complete jerk, or at least VERY questionable in her mind. There is no other way.

Wise is the man who does not resent the machine, but instead becomes a part of the machine and thereby becomes able to manipulate the machine and leverage its force to his advantage.

 

[Fruitbat]

Well, I usually offer to pay for ANY girl on the first date IF she chooses reasonable food and drink. I say upfront, I don't mind being the traditional guy on the first date but don't take the piss! If she says "yeah but I like champagne" then I revert to 50/50.

Offering is cool but xploiting this tells you what you need. I get more first night lays if you pay....girls, even good ones, do like it. By the 2nd/3rd they should be offering 50/50 or if they are poorer and you are taking them to nice places, you get the drinks, I'll get the food. Often I earn more, so I explain that I would do the same for a friend, "I'm lucky, having a good year" etc. It's this "pay for me if you want my hot ass" which is literally disgusting.

 

[The Duke]

There is no one way to do anything. All the advice here is valid.

Stick to what you believe in and what works for you. Just realize what you are dealing with and calibrate appropriately. The fact that this girl was offended tells me everything you need to know. She thinks her pu$$y is so precious that men should pay a fee for sitting next to it. Fuhk That. And why are you guys so worried about catering to women? Why worry about offending them? Stop giving your power away and stop catering to them.

Asking a girl to pay for a drink is a good test to see how entitled she is. This one failed the test.

 

[bigneil]

I just take girls to the same places I would have gone by myself. And I pay because I enjoy their company. However, for every 5 dates that I pay for I make them pay for 1 (which amounts to her covering the 20% tip on all dates).

 

[mrgoodstuff]

There is no one way to do anything. All the advice here is valid.

Stick to what you believe in and what works for you. Just realize what you are dealing with and calibrate appropriately. The fact that this girl was offended tells me everything you need to know. She thinks her pu$$y is so precious that men should pay a fee for sitting next to it. Fuhk That. And why are you guys so worried about catering to women? Why worry about offending them? Stop giving your power away and stop catering to them.

Asking a girl to pay for a drink is a good test to see how entitled she is. This one failed the test.

His framework will lead to women of good means who like to pay.

 

[wifehunter]

Dating sucks....it's way more complicated than it needs to be.