Do you think saying your GF "is all mine" makes you look weak/clingy?

[fastlife]

Bro, you are clingy & weak--and I say that from the nicest place possible--but I've seen your other posts about this girl & someone needs to say it. Some relationships can be saved with minor changes to behavior & mindset--this one can't.

You're going to get absolutely wrecked.

 

[randalljohnson]

Bro, you are clingy & weak--and I say that from the nicest place possible--but I've seen your other posts about this girl & someone needs to say it. Some relationships can be saved with minor changes to behavior & mindset--this one can't.

You're going to get absolutely wrecked.

That's what's funny

Look at the other recent thread somebody posted about "she always wants me to fix things." Somebody commented on that thread saying that after she's done with you, she's going to get involved with somebody longterm who seems very beta compared to you. So let's assume i AM beta (according to you and some others here.) Wouldn't that mean she'd want me longterm? But you said that I'm going to get wrecked in this relationship.

 

[lizardking82]

Let me paint the panorama for you:

She has a history of falling for bad boys more than once which means she probably thinks she can tie down one of these bad guys and be their golden *****, which apparently (as expected) did not work out for her; she has a kid and you're taking care of both her and her kid. On the other hand, you wanna be the nice guy to her online as well, liking all of her pics.

Let me clarify sth now:

You are all over her. You provide, you're there, you're nice, you even give her approval on social media. In her mind she probably goes "well, there goes Randall, he's a nice guy, he will be there anyways". I can feel the polarity shifting down in this relationship. Like she's giving less and less and you feel you need to give more and more.

My advice:

1) Like 15-20 of her social media posts, NOTHING MORE THAN THAT.
2) Tolerate less of what you tolerate right now. Set boundaries, she will love that.
3) Eat her ***** so well she cannot walk when you're done.
4) Try to get some on the side, you definitely need to up your self esteem because this woman is not making you feel like a real man.
5) Commenting on her pics should be so rare, like once in 2-3 weeks or a month. You see her almost everyday, what is the point?

If you don't put the "leash" around this woman now, she's gone soon and you better brace yourself for that.

 

[randalljohnson]

^^ come on bro, I'm not gonna cheat on her. Being an "alpha" doesn't mean you be a douche.

And for the record, i USED to Like alot of her stuff. I don't do it nearly as much as I used to.

 

[lizardking82]

^^ come on bro, I'm not gonna cheat on her. Being an "alpha" doesn't mean you be a douche.

So that's all you understood from my post up there? I am done here, have fun

 

[randalljohnson]

So that's all you understood from my post up there? I am done here, have fun

I hear what you said, I was just pointing that out

 

[greatsnake]

Yes. The woman is supposed to cling to you, if you really want to keep the attraction, relationship dynamic going in your favor.

 

[El Payaso]

Bad move. Never spill out your feelings for your girl most especially on social media.

 

[fastlife]

That's what's funny

Look at the other recent thread somebody posted about "she always wants me to fix things." Somebody commented on that thread saying that after she's done with you, she's going to get involved with somebody longterm who seems very beta compared to you. So let's assume i AM beta (according to you and some others here.) Wouldn't that mean she'd want me longterm? But you said that I'm going to get wrecked in this relationship.

Copyied for the other thread:

If she is insecure or necessitous, then the security & validation from a beta will be valuable enough for her to possibly keep him around, so long as he doesn't interfere with her access to guys with better genes. If you continue to have pathetic boundaries you might even be lucky enough for her to suck you dry (And not the fun kind of being sucked dry).

Here I'll try to make this easy on you:

Facts:

• She is already, at the very least, emotionally cheating on you.
• She showed more respect & pride to prior exes.

Feelings:

• But I am committed to her kiiiids--she wouldn't risk that kind of stability.
• But I make more sense on paper.
• But I see a future with her.

If she really cared about her kids' stability, she'd still have a good relationship with their father. If you really felt good about your relationship with her, there'd be no need to post about her so often on SS. But go ahead and see how useful you can be to her to stick around; just remember duration =/= quality.

 

[ubercat]

You're trying to fake having a family. Which is a deep drive in men. We are programmed to serve and protect.

Fastest way to take control is by f****** her good. Take her out and f*** her in a park in your car whatever u can manage. Move her around hair pulling arse spanking dirty talk be dominant.

Then you should be having a lot of conversations that sounds like yeah I'd love to come around baby but I've got to do...... And make sure you do have plenty to do.

And yes start chatting up other girls this is more than likely going to implode. It's cheating once she has had the exclusivity talk with you. If she hasn't then you are a free agent.

 

[Fireballs]

If your Facebook post was displayed on a big screen at a football game with 100,000 ppl there, would you feel comfortable with what is written or would you wince ?

 

[BeExcellent]

Are you her MAN or her valet?

The only context a man should ever mention the words "You are all mine" is in the bedroom where it should be a sexy declarative statement akin to "I own you (sexually)". That is the frame she responds to. That is how someone she sees as a MAN will treat her.

You post reeks of puppy love. Sorry to be so very direct but puppy love is NOT sexy.

You are in denial and setting yourself up to be blindsided. You are choosing to both ignore her "wandering eyes" and you think you can buy her love.

You need to firm up your frame on the double. If she goes...she goes. Have some self respect or she will NEVER be able respect you.

Without respecting a man a woman CANNOT love him.

 

[sazc]

Without respecting a man a woman CANNOT love him.

and she will never be loyal or devoted to him

 

[Juanto]

Would that still detract her?

Yes it would. Good news is that now after reading some of the fine posts here, you will have a better understanding how attraction works, and what can repel a woman´s interest on you.

 

[randalljohnson]

and she will never be loyal or devoted to him

You may take objection to this, but she told me when we first started dating where she stands on cheating and how she doesn't tolerate it. I don't think she would ever physically cheat on me. Tell me I'm wrong, but she seemed pretty sincere about that.

 

[Juanto]

You may take objection to this, but she told me when we first started dating where she stands on cheating and how she doesn't tolerate it. I don't think she would ever physically cheat on me. Tell me I'm wrong, but she seemed pretty sincere about that.

You are wrong

 

[sazc]

You may take objection to this, but she told me when we first started dating where she stands on cheating and how she doesn't tolerate it. I don't think she would ever physically cheat on me. Tell me I'm wrong, but she seemed pretty sincere about that.

That's great, it really is. I would never cheat on my man either, it's not who I am.

If I realize I am drawn to someone else, more so then the man I am currently dating, I break up with him first.

 

[randalljohnson]

That's great, it really is. I would never cheat on my man either, it's not who I am.

If I realize I am drawn to someone else, more so then the man I am currently dating, I break up with him first.

People have thrown around the word "emotional cheating" because she Likes some other guys pics, do u believe in that?

 

[sazc]

People have thrown around the word "emotional cheating" because she Likes some other guys pics, do u believe in that?

Yes, I believe in emotional cheating. Do I know if your woman is doing that? I dont have a clue because I am not living in your reality. Is she merely liking the pictures of friends? Or do these like's generate side conversations? Who are these men? Randoms? Ex's? long time friends? One thing is for sure, right now there is no reason for her to add a male stranger to any social media site. If she is meeting strangers and adding them, she is doing it as a safety net for herself. She shouldn't be actively trying to maintain a list of 'potentials' by keeping them as orbiters. Even if they are distant orbiters.

The bigger issue here is that her behavior makes YOU uncomfortable. If it didn't make you uncomfortable then you wouldn't be on this site posting and asking questions about what she is doing. That tells me that there is something about this relationship that doesn't feel truly committed/solid. That's a problem. The only reason to go monogamous with someone is because the relationship adds to your life in a good way. You shouldn't be choosing to add drama, chaos or feelings of insecurity when you choose a relationship.

Simply liking male pictures on social media isn't, in itself, a red flag. But when you sum total part/all of the behavior, there seem to be red flags there.

The one thing I think most of us cant figure out is - are you the one who is super insecure? Or is she generating these feelings with her behavior?

 

[Initiatedindenial]

I just want to make sure I watch this play out