So the mistake is very obvious I should have been relentlessly sexual all night.
LoL - THAT'S your takeaway from all this?? That if you had been more sexual she would have shown you more interest??
Dude... I see this same thing said by 99% of the other guys on here when a girl that initially showed interest starts waning off - that they should have been more sexual. That's not the answer! If her interest is starting to take a downward turn, the LAST thing she's thinking about is wanting to have sex with you, and you amping it up isn't going to make her brain go "Oh look, he's showing he wants sex with you - time to turn your interest back up to a higher one!"
Sometimes, it's just what happens - you have a great first date, and on the 2nd date one or both people don't feel the same spark. And it's not always because you did something wrong, either.
BUT...
With that said, based on your description of the date, there ARE things you can look at and try to improve on...
This girl was so physical on the first date and already talking about making a third date for the weekend that I thought I could relax tonight a bit and just vibe with her.
1. Until you've actually made the girl your girlfriend, NEVER ASSUME YOU'VE COMPLETELY WON HER INTEREST. This is a BIG mistake a lot of guys make after a date or two that have gone well, and it's inaccurate. Just because she's VERBALLY saying things that indicate a growing interest doesn't mean it's high enough for you yet to claim her as a victory. It takes at least 2.5 to 3 months to get a girl to that point, so even if she's saying encouraging things doesn't mean she's MENTALLY there with you yet. So, sloooow it down.
2. YOU HAVE TO KEEP CONTROL OF THE DATING PACE. You said she was trying to set up a 3rd date for that weekend? Great! However, you also know that you should only be seeing a woman once a week when you start dating her. So, if she tries to throw in an extra date - it's a great read on her growing interest, but YOU still have to be the one to understand what the RIGHT moves are to make and either turn the date down or move it to a later time. Women will sometimes make the mistake of trying to see you too much; YOU have to be the one that understands that too much time together in the beginning can be fatal for a potential relationship.
I said I like to play pool at the pub and she didn't like that. Then sat down at the pub on a couch and I said come over here and she said I'm fine.
4. YOU TOOK HER ON A BAR DATE? NO BUENO.
Another fatal mistake. Drinking dates not only indicate that you're just trying to get her drunk to have sex, but it also shows lazy effort on your part. A girl is typically spending a LOT of money to dress herself up for you in the beginning; you coming up with a date idea like a bar doesn't align with the effort she put into her look. If you're going to do the bar thing, at least have it set someplace where other things are going on, like a comedy show, or bowling - ANYTHING other than just drinks and couches (and pool tables, which are usually set up in establishments where people can smoke).
5. PUSHING FOR TOO MUCH PHYSICAL TOUCH.
I get it - you want to hook up with this girl. But SHE should be making the moves to touch YOU moreso than you trying to touch her. All this hand-holding, begging to sit on the couch with you, playing with her back and her hair... she didn't "warm up to it," she just figured you weren't going to stop and didn't want to hurt your feelings. In reality, had you kept your hands to yourself she would have been MORE comfortable and started touching YOU. Real talk - I've slept with girls on 2nd dates, and part of it was because I spent a good 3/4 of the night NOT trying to touch them, and focusing more on making them comfortable around me. Sloooow the touching dooooown - sex will happen eventually, but only if you're not making her feel creeped out.
As for her telling you about an ex-coworker? Well, it's not the BEST sign when a girl tells you she'll be hanging out with another guy. Did she specify it as a date? If not, it's probably just one of those things to see if you'll get jealous when she mentions hanging out with other guys (which is bound to happen if she has guy friends). My advice? It's only been TWO dates, and you're not in a relationship with her - therefore, it's nothing to bring up. Simply wait a few days, ask her out again (if you're wanting to see her), and see what she says.
Oh yeah, one more thing - Friday and Saturday dates should really be avoided until you're a month in with a girl, or until she brings it up. Both days are usually reserved for couples, and since you're not one yet the girl can start feeling like it's too much pressure to be in a relationship with you by going out on those days. Just a tip for the future.
Hope this helps!
