You Don’t Need a Wingman, You Need a Therapist

[self_is_an_illusion]

This forum has become a place where you treat women like prizes instead of real people. You run the same scripted lines and treat dating like shopping, ticking boxes instead of making a real connection. You think more reps make you better, but you ignore respect and consent. You chase a number instead of building a genuine bond. You need to ask yourself why you treat human interaction like a game and not just learn another trick. Stop chasing girls and start facing your own issues. You don’t need another wingman, you need a therapist.

 

[GoodMan32]

You could be onto something.

After getting a new therapist, I finally ended up getting a mild victory from an organized singles event. And a female former coworker started getting together with me one-on-one (even though there's no sex...yet)

 

[self_is_an_illusion]

You could be onto something.

After getting a new therapist, I finally ended up getting a mild victory from an organized singles event. And a female former coworker started getting together with me one-on-one (even though there's no sex...yet)

Ah yes, the “mild victory” of a woman spending time with you without sleeping with you yet. If that’s your idea of success, it proves exactly what I said. You are still measuring progress by whether or not you get sex, not by whether you built trust or connection. Therapy is not a detour to better game. It is supposed to help you grow up emotionally. If your takeaway is just waiting for a payoff, then you missed the point. You are not evolving. You are just polishing the same tired routine with a new label. Try again. Seriously.

 

[BPH]

Nah this has to be a troll. Nobody's so stupid as to go to a pickup forum to complain about pickup.

 

[nelysses]

Nah this has to be a troll. Nobody's so stupid as to go to a pickup forum to complain about pickup.

Worse than my threads? At least my threads were about pick up .D

 

[BPH]

Worse than my threads? At least my threads were about pick up .D

You are at least aware of your shortcomings and (supposedly) want to improve - even though you rarely listen to the advice you're given.

This person seems to think they know better and that we're all degenerates and morons.

 

[Travel memoir21]

Lol a lot of people here including myself need a Great wingman, not to pick up woman but like a good friend just to chill with and have a good time, also a therapist, also a pastor or priest/spiritual counselor, a platonic female friend just to respect Women as people and a dog to practice their empathy, nurturing skills.

 

[SW15]

Therapy is limited as to what it can accomplish in attraction and seduction. Going to therapy won't make you get more right swipes when using apps or get more responses to your DMs on Instagram.

Therapy probably won't make your initial openers better.

Therapy won't fix looks issues and looks are the #1 variable in attraction.

Therapy can help with some issues in intersexual interactions. It can help with some issues related to personality and your vibe.

Therapy can address traumas from failed interactions and also address mental health conditions.

It has some value but won't automatically make someone a better seducer.

Additionally, most mental health therapists will have a blue pill ideology on attraction and seduction. The typical therapist is often an older heterosexual married male who is more to a more feminist leaning woman or is a heterosexual woman who is either married or a single careerist woman.

Lifting weights and playing sports are generally better for attraction and seduction. This is because they are closely related to physique, which matters more than personality.

 

[New_Journey]

making a real connection.

Who told you I wanna make a real connection? Stop projecting.

You think more reps make you better

More Plates More Dates.

ignore respect and consent.

Cause I take what I want when I want it.

You chase a number instead of building a genuine bond.

So?

You need to ask yourself why you treat human interaction like a game

Because Humans are children with bigger toys.

you need a therapist.

This your subconscious telling what you actually need so you can project it outside. I know can't understand because your mind think like you've always had, but you need to heal your inner child.

myself need a Great wingman, not to pick up woman but like a good friend just to chill with and have a good time, also a therapist, also a pastor or priest/spiritual counselor, a platonic female friend just to respect Women as people and a dog to practice their empathy, nurturing skills.

You're so fvcking needy.

 

[GoodMan32]

Therapy is limited as to what it can accomplish in attraction and seduction. Going to therapy won't make you get more right swipes when using apps or get more responses to your DMs on Instagram.

Therapy probably won't make your initial openers better.

Therapy won't fix looks issues and looks are the #1 variable in attraction.

Therapy can help with some issues in intersexual interactions. It can help with some issues related to personality and your vibe.

Therapy can address traumas from failed interactions and also address mental health conditions.

It has some value but won't automatically make someone a better seducer.

Additionally, most mental health therapists will have a blue pill ideology on attraction and seduction. The typical therapist is often an older heterosexual married male who is more to a more feminist leaning woman or is a heterosexual woman who is either married or a single careerist woman.

Lifting weights and playing sports are generally better for attraction and seduction. This is because they are closely related to physique, which matters more than personality.

Even though I'm a staunch proponent of therapy,
you're right when you say therapy has its limitations. Therapy can help...but therapy isn't perfect.

With my current counselor, for example, one of the topics we're discussing is how I developed my crippling phobia of asking out a woman only to find out I misread the (what I thought were) IOIs.

Yet my counselor is aware (she's flat out admitted) she's unable to make me face my fear.

 

[self_is_an_illusion]

Who told you I wanna make a real connection? Stop projecting.


More Plates More Dates.


Cause I take what I want when I want it.


So?


Because Humans are children with bigger toys.


This your subconscious telling what you actually need so you can project it outside. I know can't understand because your mind think like you've always had, but you need to heal your inner child.


You're so fvcking needy.

No one’s projecting. Your words and actions speak for themselves. You’ve reduced women and dating to a transactional exchange, and that’s where your “game” fails. You can take what you want, sure, but respect isn’t weakness, it’s maturity. Keep playing the child’s game if you want, but don’t be surprised when you end up alone, never understanding what real connection feels like.

 

[New_Journey]

You’ve reduced women and dating to a transactional exchange

With women I exchange time & validation for sex. Like in every other relationship in human history.

maturity

Maturity is the understanding that we have only one life and if you don't get outside your head, you'll be miserable for the rest of it.

never understanding what real connection feels like.

I've had that, I know what it feels, and yes its good. But you know what is as good as connection with another human being? Being happy by yourself.

but don’t be surprised when you end up alone

What's wrong with being alone? I don't need anybody with me to feel loved.

 

[Barrister]

This forum has become a place where you treat women like prizes instead of real people. You run the same scripted lines and treat dating like shopping, ticking boxes instead of making a real connection. You think more reps make you better, but you ignore respect and consent. You chase a number instead of building a genuine bond. You need to ask yourself why you treat human interaction like a game and not just learn another trick. Stop chasing girls and start facing your own issues. You don’t need another wingman, you need a therapist.

We can agree that a lot of men would do best to focus on themselves prior to focusing on women. Getting your own sh1t together is paramount in life -- better looking women and more women is simply a bonus.

I am not sure where you are getting that SS is a place where women are treated like "prizes instead of real people." And let's be honest, early stage dating is completely transactional for both sides. Maybe that isn't with money - but at a minimum with your time. Your argument is conflating that with the thought that acknowledging dating's transactional nature is "ignoring respect and consent." Some guys (and women even), certainly are playing the numbers game. But I think you're making blanket statements suggesting that this forum has adopted that attitude across the board.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

We can agree that a lot of men would do best to focus on themselves prior to focusing on women. Getting your own sh1t together is paramount in life -- better looking women and more women is simply a bonus.

I am not sure where you are getting that SS is a place where women are treated like "prizes instead of real people." And let's be honest, early stage dating is completely transactional for both sides.

This is the main point OP is missing - it's not worth pursuing real connections if you're not able to weed out the undesirables first, which necessitates taking a "transactional" approach in the early stages..

The second key point, is that via feminism, the female gender started the "war". Whether or not they were misled into it or not, the reality still exists.