You are going to change today.

[AC/DC]

Originally posted by Mycroft
1. I need to convey an air of cofidence that shows through my physical apperence, athough I am mentally confident.

2. I need to learn to flirt without the result being friends with a girl.

1.) Look in the mirrow, and try to see what body language you convey. Try to maybe fix your posture, the way you stand, or where you put your hands.

2.) Create intimacy.

 

[AC/DC]

Originally posted by Flabbergasped?
Problem: My problem is close to Comeback Kid's, but it goes deeper. I just don't want girls enough. I could have a golden opportunity, but I ignore it, not because I couldn't or because I was lazy, but because I don't view it as important. That happens really often, and maybe it's because I have so much on my mind lately (extracurriculars, senior year wrapup, etc), and so on. The DJing part is fine, but the actual actions just aren't coming.

Because of that, I don't go past basic flirting. I'm sure I can, and I have, but afterwards, I just stop pushing for it. Subconsciously, I don't value girls enough to actually do anything (not to say I'm sexist, I've approached plenty of girls, just never gotten very far past that point.)

Once you get p*ssy, you get addicted to it. Don't worry, when you start feeling certain chemistry, you'll go with it and get to certain points. Don't worry about it. It's a mental thing. If you find school more important... GOOD! I never did, that's why I'm in community college.

 

[AC/DC]

Originally posted by Dante3214
#1: I'm full of avoidance, the example in question, is a time when I talked/met this girl. She was quite nice, and strangely social (very social). I talked to her at the beginning of the year (only a freshman!) and after about a week she was moved to a distant side of the room. I have very little time to reach her in class, but the 30 second timespan I have doesn't give me much to ask/talk about... so I'm left feeling that I just wasted an important opportunity.. again

#2: There's another girl that used to be in my P.E. class, and in the time I talked to her I suprisingly got off on a better-than-retarded note. I like to talk to her because she see's things in me that no one else has seen (yet). Such as me being hurt when someone states something like.. "man you're short!" or "you're way too quiet!". I sit RIGHT next to her at lunch, luckily.. and I thought about using "kino" with her (it sounds so strange when I type it), but I don't because I'm afraid I'm going to weird her out (even though she seems perfectly fine with it). Now the only other problem I have, is striking up a match of conversation. Like everyone else, getting that match to burn fiercely is seemingly difficult.. I have honestly tried saying "just be yourself man.." ... but "myself" is one who is not afraid of touch, and loves to see women smile. (just a note: I AM taller than her! )

#3: This problem is nowhere near as daunting, and it is somewhat helpful.. in a way. There's a girl that I'm "friends" with... except I KNOW she likes me (she wrote it..) but I REALLY don't like her! AT ALL! On a scale of 10 she's a 4. She's touchy/feely .. and kinda creepy. She has absolutely no concept of human life and is quite the emo. BUT IT SUCKS SO MUCH!
I try to get her away! BUT SHE DOESN'T GET THE PICTURE! Ugh! I do my best to get her away but it has an opposite effect!
Why don't you just tell her to pl*ck off you might ask? Well, She's in two of my periods and my lunch (she luckily doesn't sit next to me at lunch), and as you know, women are emotional. The last thing I want is sick love-attention from that strange girl (I'm serious, I don't like fat chicks). Making a scene would be terrible for my slowly-climbing "reputation"... The only thing good about it is that I learned that I was actually fairly attractive. My eyes are somehow "pretty". And I have eyelashes that women die for..?

Another Note: After looking in the mirror for three hours (lol), and asking 1-2 random girls in a hallway, it would turn out that I'm not anywhere as bad as I thought I was! I'm almost clear-faced (little acne), I'm actually somewhere near cut now (muscles grow quickly when you have no body fat!). Just wanted to say that I don't really hold all girls on some silly magik pedestal (note #3), and I could easily get along with any girl I wanted, so long as I had the social skillz. (I have read most of the bible, but I may have missed something).

Please pm me if you care, as I'm not really sure what to do atm.. and I have VERY little patience with myself

1) That's okay if you're not ready to talk to her just yet. Leave that one alone for now.

2) Talk to her, ask her how she notices these things. Tell her waht you think of her in return. Talk to her about whatever you want after. Easy!

3) Make it perfectly clear that you just want to be friends.

Patience is very hard. I don't have much at all. However, you need (and its essential!) to understand that this is a PROCESS, and it takes TIME to develop along with EXPERIENCE. Nothing comes easily in this game. You earn everything. Get used to it, and start liking it. I often find that the thrill of spitting game to get a girl is better than actually having her sometimes.

 

[AC/DC]

Originally posted by phatboi408
I have givin up and Im not trying at all to get girls.

Iwould want to but I need to change my look. I always wear a hood because Im trying to grow my hair, if not it looks like crap.

I usto have spiked hair and now Im tryin to grow it out and it looks like crap(to me). I need help on hair styles (long hair) and then that would boost my confedence. It doesnt look like crap but I dont like it so Im growing it longer to see if it looks any good.

I cant really help you unless you show me pics. PM me with links and I can definitely help you, because I live near you and know what's the style and what's not.

 

[AC/DC]

Originally posted by JayCamx23
let me start with the pros.

1. I am a good looking person. not gonna lie. i get a lot of glances from girls on the street.
2. I apply a lot of C&F.
3. i take good care of myself(lifting, nice clothes, shoes, change my hairstyle every few months)
4. Not intimidated( atleast by the girls i already know)

Cons:
1. i am not aggressive at all. lazy( i dont approach new girls)
2. dont make enough moves(go for numbers or date requests on the girls i know)
3. Sometimes have trouble keeping conversations going
4. O ya, and i cant drive yet

In My Opinion, its all about being aggressive. Gotta go for what i want

Any advice?

Focus on getting a car. That's now your main priority.

It's not lack of aggressiveness. It's lack of comfort. You're not yet ready to do all that, although you have the right mindset. You're just not that comfortable yet. That's fine, keep immersing yourself with girls, and it'll come easy to you after a bit. Keep up the good work!

 

[Dante3214]

Thanks AC/DC...

I got girl #3 off my back by getting rid of that little shard of social phobia that I had stuck in the back of my brain!

Going to see how things turn out over the week with the other...


Appreciated!

 

[Mycroft]

Originally posted by AC/DC
1.) Look in the mirrow, and try to see what body language you convey. Try to maybe fix your posture, the way you stand, or where you put your hands.

2.) Create intimacy.

Thanks, will do.

 

[AC/DC]

Originally posted by Bling
1) I'm one skinny mother****er,
2) not the best with come backs
3) Lately been getting way too hyper, and getting people annoyed. I think I've been having like 70g of sugar during lunch--bad move. Don't know what to bring to lunch. I hate tuna, and school food is nasty pizza or nasty processed chicken.
4) Not good with the ladies. I have a bunch of girls I'm interested in right now, but there's one I really like. I kino her, but for some odd reason, I pick on her like hell. and I don't mean cute picking on, I've actually said some real mean things to her unintentionally. I think I ruined my chances, and it's a bummer.
5) My bags under my eyes.

1) Start working out. Start with pushups, incline pushups, and curls.

2) You'll get better. I would advise calling me.

3) Something similar to Subway sandwiches will make you feel pretty damn good. Also, bananas and fruits.

4) Why are you being so mean? I'm always a sweetheart to my girl, and she really likes me for that. I make her feel good.

5) Sleep more. If not, ask a pharmacist to recommend you something.

 

[Void]

Tell me if you can help.

I don't have any problems talking to girls...today I even got rejected even though I had kissed this girl before. But shes a ***** now...we use to date. Recently, instead of going for girls romantically I've just been doing weed occassionally (every one or two weekends ). And to be honest I don't feel that bad about it, but I know I need some girls but I convince myself it doesn't matter when im about to ask a girl who I'm taking a risk with. I havn't been in "romantic" with a girl for awhile now and its bugging me. The girl I got rejected by has been hooking up with this total druggie and wow I feel bad. Yo I don't have any problem with making friends, and i have a lot of guys that are friends..

My solution...is that I need to try harder and take more risks...without risk there is no success?

 

[itishe]

AC/DC, you ever do stuff with a polarlizing girl?

There's this chick I know who'd love to get freaky, but thing is she's decent looking to me and others, while the other half think she's just ugly as hell. I know you'll tell me to get balls and do what I want, but I'll get a ton of flack if I were to.

Best way to go about this? Just do it the stuff to get some practice for the hotter ladies?

 

[AC/DC]

Originally posted by itishe
AC/DC, you ever do stuff with a polarlizing girl?

There's this chick I know who'd love to get freaky, but thing is she's decent looking to me and others, while the other half think she's just ugly as hell. I know you'll tell me to get balls and do what I want, but I'll get a ton of flack if I were to.

Best way to go about this? Just do it the stuff to get some practice for the hotter ladies?

Hot or not, you're still getting freaky aren't you? You don't need to tell everyone about it.

 

[AC/DC]

Originally posted by Void
Tell me if you can help.

I don't have any problems talking to girls...today I even got rejected even though I had kissed this girl before. But shes a ***** now...we use to date. Recently, instead of going for girls romantically I've just been doing weed occassionally (every one or two weekends ). And to be honest I don't feel that bad about it, but I know I need some girls but I convince myself it doesn't matter when im about to ask a girl who I'm taking a risk with. I havn't been in "romantic" with a girl for awhile now and its bugging me. The girl I got rejected by has been hooking up with this total druggie and wow I feel bad. Yo I don't have any problem with making friends, and i have a lot of guys that are friends..

My solution...is that I need to try harder and take more risks...without risk there is no success?

With no risk there is no reward. So she's too stupid to understand what you're giving her. Oh well, there's way more beautiful girls out there who don't think that way. Eventually she'll realize that her boyfriend is a drug addicted idiot, and she'll feel bad for herself. It's sad sometimes you can't be there to see it, but it always happens.

 

[08aisaac]

Ahh, that's another problem. Someone just posted about social acceptance of the girls they date, or hook up with.
That's a problem with me. I can easily get with a lot of girls, but I don't because I don't know how bad my rep would be if I did.
Should I care? Since it is my reputation, and I once had a horrible rep, and it wasn't fun at all. Do people really care that much about who you date?
I seem to attract sluts to no end.

 

[itishe]

Originally posted by AC/DC
Hot or not, you're still getting freaky aren't you? You don't need to tell everyone about it.

I know to keep my mouth shut, not so sure about her though.

 

[AC/DC]

Originally posted by 08aisaac
Ahh, that's another problem. Someone just posted about social acceptance of the girls they date, or hook up with.
That's a problem with me. I can easily get with a lot of girls, but I don't because I don't know how bad my rep would be if I did.
Should I care? Since it is my reputation, and I once had a horrible rep, and it wasn't fun at all. Do people really care that much about who you date?
I seem to attract sluts to no end.

Sluts are people too

Your rep is important in high school. Outside of high school, who cares? Do whatever you feel comfortable with. I'm 18, my girlfriend is 16, but guaranteed she's more mature than most girls you know over the age of 20. Yeah, I get a lot of that "your girlfriend is young" crap. If I don't care, and she don't care, and her parents dont care, then why should anyone else? My girlfriend is a total babe.

In any case, have sex with whoever you want. If other people try to make you look bad, tell them to shut the hell up and mind their own business. Seriously, it's not their business.

 

[The Comeback Kid]

Originally posted by The Comeback Kid
With Senior Prom coming up in 4 1/2 months, this may be a good time to post my main problem:

My main problem is taking flirting to the next level and developing things from there. For example, I talk to girls comfortably and I'm not real nervous. Once that intial flirting ends, I'm in trouble.

I have absolutely no problem talking to girls - I feel confident and girls have told me I am more "mature" (like how I carry myself, personality) than other guys. I am witty and can get girls to laugh as well (a lot of the time with wit). Unfortuately, I am not really good when it comes to kino and things like that. I've never gone on a date (I've asked out several girls during high school, but all said no, even though most of them showed some pretty good signs) never kissed a girl and never had s*x.

So, in short, my main problem is initiating kino constantly and getting girls to think of me in a more "dating" mind. I feel I am a good guy and am well-liked at school with both guys and girls (hot girls talk to me, but it seems it's not really with any dating intent), but I need to start sweeping girls off their feet...and I haven't been able to do it so far.

A smaller problem I have is I do get nervous when I'm instantly put on the spot, and I'm not prepared (I try to always be prerared for anything, but sometimes, I'm caught off-guard). Two weeks ago, some kid I get along with (but don't hang with outside of school) invited me to a party and said he had a girl there just for me from another school (I knew this wasn't exactly true, but he did invite me to the party). For some reason, I didn't feel comfortable with the whole situation - I was being put on the spot and I don't like having everyone watch every single move I take. So I guess this "being put on the spot" is my other problem.

Hey AC/DC - just curious if you could offer some advice on this. I know a couple of other people have the same or a similar problem and have said so on this thread.

My biggest concern is that my school's Senior Prom is in 4 months, and I don't really have anyone to ask. I'm not really good friends with any girls (or more than that - just acquaintances), so this makes it tougher. I need to speed this process up if I'm going to get a date. I think I am well-known at my school, but I still do not know a ton of chicks and HB's on a personal level.

Ah - one more thing. Back in 10th grade, some people thought I liked every girl I talked to (bad year...don't want to get into it), especially since I was a big AFC back then and hung to two girls most of the year - they both said no with a passion. So of course, two years later, some people still think I have feelings for every hot chick I talk to (some girls may feel this too - they always seem to be hiding just a little bit), which is obviously not true. If I go up and talk to some HB9 or 10, and some other guys are around, they shart "ooo"ing and "ahh"ing - it gets to be real annoying.

P.S. - I have tried to talk to more girls and use more kino when I get the chance (I got to strangle some HB 7.5 in one of my classes and I didn't get in trouble...don't worry - it was a skit). Still, I haven't gotten into a real groove yet (hopefully, that can come soon) and I still am not somewhat "close" to any HB's yet. I'm still trying to improve though. I don't think I look bad (no Brad Pitt, but not bad - just short, at 5'6" and 135lbs) so I'm optimistic I can get a date to the Prom.

 

[AC/DC]

First of all, sorry I missed your post, I thought I already answered it... my bad on that. Let's break this down piece by piece and dissect your problem. This will be brief because I'm "going to work" aka kickin it with my beautiful lady all day and all evening, and probably all night too

Originally posted by The Comeback Kid
Hey AC/DC - just curious if you could offer some advice on this. I know a couple of other people have the same or a similar problem and have said so on this thread.

My biggest concern is that my school's Senior Prom is in 4 months, and I don't really have anyone to ask. I'm not really good friends with any girls (or more than that - just acquaintances), so this makes it tougher. I need to speed this process up if I'm going to get a date. I think I am well-known at my school, but I still do not know a ton of chicks and HB's on a personal level.

Why? Are you repulsive? Maybe you're not ugly, but you don't interest people. They are not interested in getting to know you. You need to change that. Show them how nice or how funny or how cute you are. I've mastered this completely.

Ah - one more thing. Back in 10th grade, some people thought I liked every girl I talked to (bad year...don't want to get into it), especially since I was a big AFC back then and hung to two girls most of the year - they both said no with a passion. So of course, two years later, some people still think I have feelings for every hot chick I talk to (some girls may feel this too - they always seem to be hiding just a little bit), which is obviously not true. If I go up and talk to some HB9 or 10, and some other guys are around, they shart "ooo"ing and "ahh"ing - it gets to be real annoying.

People did that to me too. Then I start gaming hot girls, and now only a few people try to mess with me. But again, this brings me to my problem: why do you not have friends? We need to break this down together, you can call me and I can pinpoint your issues.

P.S. - I have tried to talk to more girls and use more kino when I get the chance (I got to strangle some HB 7.5 in one of my classes and I didn't get in trouble...don't worry - it was a skit). Still, I haven't gotten into a real groove yet (hopefully, that can come soon) and I still am not somewhat "close" to any HB's yet. I'm still trying to improve though. I don't think I look bad (no Brad Pitt, but not bad - just short, at 5'6" and 135lbs) so I'm optimistic I can get a date to the Prom.

LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAH
STRANGLING A GIRL IS NOT KINO!

"Does Wayne Brady have to choke a b*tch?"

Anyways, you seem to have underlying social issues. PM me, and I'll give you my number. I'll turn you into a Champ, I promise.

 

[AC/DC]

That's it? THat's all you guys can throw at me?

 

[taiwanesedude227]

1) I don't really have a lot of cool friends at my school because I'm in mostly "smart" classes with lots of nerdy kids, so I don't really have any social proof for getting a girl. Not a lot of girls would want to go out with someone who isn't in the "cool" crowd.

2) It's hard for me to make friends in my classes because it seems like everyone already knows each other and is already in a group.

3) I have almost no hot girls in my classes.

4) Flirting/C&F/Kino feels really awkward for me. I do get in some kino and c&f comments but i don't have that much confidence and I always feel nervous when I do it. I think girls pick up on this.

 

[jlazz]

AC/DC help me out:

I'm starting to go to more parties and meet more people. How do u you get over that inferiority feeling when you're around overly confident friends? I'm still kind of insecure and don't talk as much when I'm around some people...IDK how to get over it.

Also, lets say you meet a few chill guys at a party and some girls...I get their #...would it be weird to randomly call them up a week later to see whats goin on and if there are any parties and such going on? I went to a party friday night, but was extremely sober after pregaming and felt like ****. I didn't get any #'s, but I met some chill guys and some girls...I friended them on myspace. I'll get their SN's through there and chat it up.

There's this one girl I met a few weeks ago at a friend's house and she was showing some interest, but idk. I never got her # and didn't see her afterwards, but I found her on myspace and added her. I'll get her SN and chat it up. Any advice for this chick? Maybe ask her whens the next time she's going to be over that kid's house and such?

How come whenever I come after a party or somewhere I go, I feel like ****. Maybe its the alcohol or idk, but when I reflect on my night, I feel like it sucked. I'm outgoing, like I'll introduce myself to random people with energy and stuff and people remember my name, but after that I can't startup a convo. The subsiding of my buzz might've hindered my convo skills as well because I felt really bored and lazy.

I was the only guy that started dancing with the 5 girls that were grinding, but couldn't get my **** up so I felt lame. I stopped dancing and just chilled on the side.

Offer any advice you can.