WTH... Rejected because of my... body.

[dandellion]

Hi,

I was out last night with the boys; loads of drinking and general good times; My spirits were high!

We get to the club, and its packed, ok not really my scene but what the hell. Start chatting to some girls, meet some people I havent met in a long time. All in all having a good time, smiling and chatting to people.

Then I start noticing this blonde(HB7-8), whos is literally stalking me; dancing like crazy right in front of me. Ok I guess she wants to talk, since she is literally there wherever I go in the club...

So I open her and her friend up, she seems SUPER HAPPY that I talked to her. (Hey, this seems like a sealed deal). We chat for a bit, she tells me that Im handsome, light kino, she keeps playing with her hair and she keeps leaning her head, biting her lip and looking into my eyes in a "kiss me"-kind of way.

Then she feels me up, and says "Im looking for a strong guy", and ok Im not ripped, but Im not fat or skinny. And I laugh while shes doing it... And then she just leaves telling me she needs to go downstairs. Boom, like that. I was a bit confused. I see her later on in the bar with some other guy, so I walk over and tell her Im leaving; to which she seems very indifferent.

Ive never had a girl reject me based on my body before. So it was slightly strange. Our whole interaction lasted for about 20mins, and her body language was telling me she was all in until she felt me up.

Anyone had similar stuff happen to them?

 

[floydb25]

That's the bar/club scene for ya. Shallow people just looking to get their kicks. There's so many options available to everyone; with them all looking for the same things. You could be the guy they want one minute - until they find another one the next. Then, you're no longer important to them. Used to have it happen all the time, and I used to do it as well. Just the way it is.

You can't take this kind of situation personally. That's how it is when you go to these kind of places. Most encounters last a few minutes to a few days.

 

[Serg897]

This is why the club scene sucks. Great for one night stands with shallow girls, but otherwise avoid if you want to meet someone that is actually intelligent. Way better places for that.

 

[backbreaker]

the club breaks things down to the most fundamental levels of attraction. it's not really "wrong" it just is. you don't have time to have a real conversation with someone, the only thing you can judge someone on is how they look and your preferences, and the place is packed with options. It's cut throat.

dont' take it pesonally. The mistake guys make in the club, especially seemingly on here, is they get locked on to one target and when that target acts pissy, they down the entire club experience

you should talk to no less than 5-7 girls when in the club. it truly is a numbers game when you go to the club. you game/dance with enough women one of them will be into you.

which is why you have to have game before you go to the club. not even game, you have to get over your fear of approaching women. if you don't have a fear of approaching women the club is shooting fish in a barrel. it's damn near impossible to not have success in the club.


when you sit down and think about it, the club is really no different than any other experience. people act like non quality people only go to clubs, I went to clubs pretty often. I am married now so I really don't anymore but we have from time to time. I know plenty of high quality women who go/went to clubs.

The only difference between the club and going on dates, is that the entire process happens 10x faster.

You meet, "get to know" someone, and get rejected 10x faster than you would if you met someone, played the phone text game or w2hatever, went on a couple of fake dates, and she flakes out over a period of a week versus 20 minutes in the club.

and if a woman isn't attracted to you,. a woman isn't attracted to you. That's the AFC in you talking if you think there is something you can say or do at a bookstore that you can't do in a club. There is no magical word or phrase or technique that is going to make her get wet over you that you can't use in the club lol. she just isn't into you. HECK I'm not into every girl I see it's not a big deal.

 

[Iceberg]

the club breaks things down to the most fundamental levels of attraction. it's not really "wrong" it just is. you don't have time to have a real conversation with someone, the only thing you can judge someone on is how they look and your preferences, and the place is packed with options. It's cut throat.

dont' take it pesonally. The mistake guys make in the club, especially seemingly on here, is they get locked on to one target and when that target acts pissy, they down the entire club experience

you should talk to no less than 5-7 girls when in the club. it truly is a numbers game when you go to the club. you game/dance with enough women one of them will be into you.

which is why you have to have game before you go to the club. not even game, you have to get over your fear of approaching women. if you don't have a fear of approaching women the club is shooting fish in a barrel. it's damn near impossible to not have success in the club.

What he said.

I could write a sitcom about the various rejections I've gotten in the club.

Don't focus on one girl and her one rejection. Just laugh it off and move on. Keep dancing, keep laughing, keep enjoying your friends. You'll put out a better vibe and more women will gravitate towards you.

When you're in a club it's not about one girl. It can't be. It'll ruin your night if you play it that way.

 

[SharinganUser]

Did she grab your crotch or something?

 

[backbreaker]

What he said.

I could write a sitcom about the various rejections I've gotten in the club.

Don't focus on one girl and her one rejection. Just laugh it off and move on. Keep dancing, keep laughing, keep enjoying your friends. You'll put out a better vibe and more women will gravitate towards you.

When you're in a club it's not about one girl. It can't be. It'll ruin your night if you play it that way.

on the other hand, probably my best ONS to date, I f'ed a NBA cheerleader I met at a club., simply becuase I had the balls to try to game her. god she was smokin hot too. This was damn near 8 years ago. And earlier that night I got shot down by 2 girls that weren't anywhere near her level looks wise.

You have to go to the club with a honey badger attitude, just not giving a fvck about what any of these girls say or think or act. you are going to talk to 10 girls dammit come hell or high water. one of them is going to like you.

I mean I have better things to do with my time than to go to clubs every week but I don't **** clubs, some of my most epic lays/dates/good times have been clubbing experiences. strippers, cheerleaders, just smoking hot women. once you get over the "lock on one girl" mode and make it your mission to have fun and game any and every attractive woman you see without thinking twice a bout it, it's hard not to be successful


but yeah I've had some rejections too that you can't do anything but shake your head and laugh. but it's the nature of the beast.

 

[Atom Smasher]

When I go to MacDonald's I don't expect to find Fillet Mignon on the menu.

 

[PapiChulo]

Eh, who cares? She might just want the ripped guy while using you for some attention. In some clubs over here, there are way too many seriously jacked up guys....still having problems too. It's a jungle - act accordingly. On the side note: get shut down by a couple of women, and the rest might just take notice.

 

[Aaron B]

who cares?

i'd be willing to bet if she felt your six-pack abs her response would have been that she doesn't like ripped guys because they are too vain and in love with themselves or whatever

she's just some stupid woman who thinks its okay to f with other peoples' heads

is that really someone you want in your life?

if you just wanted sex you probably could have still banged her but then you might get all hung up and in love and have actually come out way worse than the situation resolved itself here

 

[Mike32ct]

Club girls are ruthless. They can lead you on for a while then ditch you and leave with another dude. I've had it happen. It's nasty and used to hurt really bad, but I learned to not care.

The club is a high risk / high reward environment. The possible reward (a ONS) is high, But the risk of a nasty rejection is also very high. In the club, you need a VERY thick skin and be willing to LOSE BIG in order to eventually WIN BIG.

I also fully agree with everything backbreaker said. Attraction is king in the club, and things move much faster than in the dating world. Instead of the online chick flaking two weeks later, the club chick flakes in minutes.

While you should approach and "roll the dice" when chicks throw IOIs at you, keep some healthy skepticism. Ironically, I've had more success approaching girls that initially showed NO interest. When a girl shows VERY HIGH interest off the bat, sometimes it's a red flag that she's an AW. On the other hand, sometimes you can hit it out of the park. It's a gamble.

Like Aaron was getting at, they can always from something to b*tch about. If you aren't muscular enough, you're not the right height, race, age, hairstyle, etc.

Charge it to the game. A thick skin is necessary no matter where you game women, but in a club, it's super critical.

 

[perseverance]

I wouldn't take any notice of the club scene and what goes on in it.

I don't take it seriously and neither should you. The club game is a topsey turvey game, one week you could score with numerous women only to spend the next two months with no action on the dancefloor at all.

I tend to just go to a club with a few friends to drink some beer and dance to some music, I never look to pick up women in nightclubs. If it happens, fair play, if it doesn't then fair play, as long as I have enjoyed my night then I go home happy.

What I have noticed about clubs is that there are lots of little cliques in nightclubs, friends travelling in groups tend to stay in those groups and I am noticing more and more clubs opening large VIP areas and placing a lot of seating at the edges of their clubs which is encouraging a more laid back atmosphere for those who aren't really interested in dancing all night long. This makes the pool of women available harder and given that a majority of clubs are sausage fests at the best of times it makes competition that much more intense for the average man.

I've also had women approach me on behalf of their friend, so their friend can get in with my mate. There I am thinking "I'm in here" only to find out that the girl in question has approached me, danced with me, not because she is interested but because her friend is interested in my friend and was too scared to approach him when me and my other friend were next to him. I have to laugh at things like that. I think it's a smart game plan on their part and fair play to them for approaching, not many women drunken or sober would even contemplate approaching men.

The club game is a hard game to play, but it basically comes down to Lady Luck being on your side.

 

[Mike32ct]

Finally there are a LOT of factors you don't control.

To score you need all three of these:

1. You need a girl who is attracted to your type.

2. She has to be DTF ie looking to F that night.

3. She has to have favorable logistics. For example is she alone (rare but golden) or can she get away from her friends?

Even if such a girl with all three exists, will she be at the same club/bar as you? Will you meet her at the right time before some other dude does?

So, even with good game and a thick skin, there is still a significant element of luck involved to meet the right person, at the right place, and at the right time.

 

[BigJimbo]

I'm sure if you had lots of money and looked like your father she would have rejected you as well - NOT! Men not boys. Money not students. Luxury SUV not sh--ty Korean car. Or you could pretend that you are watching Hollywood tv where Seth Goldstein tells you that girls want someone their age who has a cute smile. Uh, nope. Truth is that Seth Goldstein wants a young boy with a cute smile. Don't believe me? Research the name Lou Pearlman. Boy bands = Homosexual Male Fantasies.

 

[backbreaker]

Club girls are ruthless. They can lead you on for a while then ditch you and leave with another dude. I've had it happen. It's nasty and used to hurt really bad, but I learned to not care.

The club is a high risk / high reward environment. The possible reward (a ONS) is high, But the risk of a nasty rejection is also very high. In the club, you need a VERY thick skin and be willing to LOSE BIG in order to eventually WIN BIG.

I also fully agree with everything backbreaker said. Attraction is king in the club, and things move much faster than in the dating world. Instead of the online chick flaking two weeks later, the club chick flakes in minutes.

While you should approach and "roll the dice" when chicks throw IOIs at you, keep some healthy skepticism. Ironically, I've had more success approaching girls that initially showed NO interest. When a girl shows VERY HIGH interest off the bat, sometimes it's a red flag that she's an AW. On the other hand, sometimes you can hit it out of the park. It's a gamble.

Like Aaron was getting at, they can always from something to b*tch about. If you aren't muscular enough, you're not the right height, race, age, hairstyle, etc.

Charge it to the game. A thick skin is necessary no matter where you game women, but in a club, it's super critical.

It's funny how life works. I mean by the time I was 23-24 years old and I would go out I could have some success, even before that I would have some mild success but by the time I was 23 or so years old I really got the hang of it.

now that 1. I am married and 2. i am a full time horse player, and the horse track schedule doesn't correlate with clubbing on weekends, I don't get to go to the club that much. But my wife does like to dance (even though she can't) and we like to get out so the times I don't work on the weekend we usually go out to a club to get out the house, go dancing or what ever

and now that I actually take my wife, it's like i have to beat girls off with a freaking bat. More than once I"ve had women try to dance with me while I was dancing iwth my wife and she be like "umm.. babe.. not happening" and I mean good looking girls too.

i also think don't think it's any coincidence that now when I go the last thing on my mind are the other girls in the club.

 

[HalfAddict]

Ha I lived with that my entire school career and early twenties... ain't no thing dude.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Can you imagine how offended a woman would be if a man felt her BODY and then just walked away because she didn't make the grade? Unthinkable, and yet...

If you're going to play night game you're going to need to play by the rules. Use this as an impetus to hit the gym.

 

[dandellion]

I didnt take it personally! And it was a 20 minute interaction, nothing I poured my heart and soul in. It just has not happened before like that.

I go to clubs to have fun with my friends, It was, as Atom Smasher says, such a crude rejection. Like yesterday; A girl saw through all the crap I was talking, which is fine, but feeling me up and just rejecting me is a bit over the top. In hindsight I probably should have called her out on it, but I was a bit flabbergasted and she was probably a AW.

It didnt ruin my night or anything though.

I think I should stay away from clubs for a while, although they can be fun, they are, in the end, a waste of time, health and money.

 

[perseverance]

I didnt take it personally! And it was a 20 minute interaction, nothing I poured my heart and soul in. It just has not happened before like that.

I go to clubs to have fun with my friends, It was, as Atom Smasher says, such a crude rejection. Like yesterday; A girl saw through all the crap I was talking, which is fine, but feeling me up and just rejecting me is a bit over the top. In hindsight I probably should have called her out on it, but I was a bit flabbergasted and she was probably a AW.

It didnt ruin my night or anything though.

If it didn't affect you, you wouldn't be posting about it and the fact you wished you called her out says it did affect you in some fashion.

 

[Slickster]

Her: "I'm looking for a strong guy." (feels you up)
You: "You couldn't handle me."
Her: "blah blah blah"

Her response doesn't matter, nor does the outcome.