Would it be AFC to do this?

[ARrocket]

Alright, my senior prom is in 5 or 6 weeks (too lazy to do the quick math). There are plenty of girls I COULD ask to prom if I wanted to, but I haven't really been interested in any of them. However, there is this girl that just transfered to my school this semester. She's interested. I like her (not that I'd let HER know yet )

Should I ask her to prom? I was going to ask her on a date for this coming weekend, but then I thought about prom. I guess I should ask somebody soon, since prom is coming up quickly, but would it be too AFC to ask her? The timing of all of this is really horrible. Is it ok to just say "do you want to go to prom with me?" I never ask for date like that, but I don't think a "I'm going to prom, you should come along" would work here...lol

 

[ARrocket]

oh one more thing...I was thinking I could go out on that date with her, and if I liked her after that, I'd ask her to prom, but I'm worried somebody else will ask her in the meantime....

 

[Interceptor]

Number one, do not act out of FEAR.

Do not do things because you are 'worried'.


You cannot OWN or POSSESS this girl
And if some other guy asks her out and she accepts, you need to accept that.
This is how LIFE IS.


What you shold undestand that a woman will have a higher chance of accepting and joining you on the date, not flaking, if you have established enough attraction, and rapport with her.
You do not have to tell her you 'like' her.
get that idea out of your head.

So get to talking with that girl, and establish something fun and easy goin gwith her.

Be the decisive leader, in control and confident.

That is who you REALLY ARE.

So USE this opportunity to show her who you really are.

Decsivive
Confident
Leader
Sexual
Interesting
Charming

Go get her

But you shoudl try to establish communication with her, and see if you can go out on a date before the prom.
Just try to avoid having the mindset that this is a Life or death decision, and the outocme is soooo incredibly Important .

Put things in proper perspective.

 

[I.A.F.Y.B.]

Yeah, don't rush into asking her to prom. You got some time.... Keep creating interest in her and hang out with her from time to time. If your interested and you think she is; ask her to prom.

 

[ARrocket]

Ok, I guess I'll get that date first, and if that goes well, I'll ask her to prom.

 

[NoMoreTapDancing]

Tell her straight:
"You're coming with me to the prom. Trust me."
Simple.

 

[ARrocket]

Tell her straight:
"You're coming with me to the prom. Trust me."
Simple.

lol was the "trust me" supposed to be included inside of the quotation marks?

hmm...I like that. I'd tweak it a little to fit me, but it's interesting...

 

[NoMoreTapDancing]

yeah the 'trust me' is part of the quotation lol.
Imagine the girl who comes up to her slowly and timidly and asks
"Would you like to come to the prom with me?" versus the guy whos walking past her in the hall with his buddies saying "oh yeah, and that's the girl who's coming with me to the prom" then you all high-5 each other, then she's like "Err, no i'm not going with you...!?" then you're like (over your shoulder while you're walking past" "Oh yeah, you're coming with me to the prom... trust me." - how cool would you be??... sorry my imagination got carried away with me again haha, i should write scripts.

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

yeah the 'trust me' is part of the quotation lol.
Imagine the girl who comes up to her slowly and timidly and asks
"Would you like to come to the prom with me?" versus the guy whos walking past her in the hall with his buddies saying "oh yeah, and that's the girl who's coming with me to the prom" then you all high-5 each other, then she's like "Err, no i'm not going with you...!?" then you're like (over your shoulder while you're walking past" "Oh yeah, you're coming with me to the prom... trust me." - how cool would you be??... sorry my imagination got carried away with me again haha, i should write scripts.

So your gonna give a dude some advice based on a "script" you just made up and never tested.

All i can picture is Biff from Back To The Future using that line, and that crap ain't cool.

This guy needs to go out on a few dates with her and see how things go, then once there's a sort of dating thing established, it's totally cool to ask the prom question. This will do 2 things. Land him a hot date for that ever so special highschool landmark and two, secure him a chick in the semi-longterm, up until prom at least.

 

[NoMoreTapDancing]

Where did you get the impression that that was made up and I never tested it? Secondly I was trying to illustrate the kind of mentality you need to have if you want things to go your way, but from the sound it you're the kind of guy who things it would be better to go on 2 dates to 'establish a sort of dating thing'. It's exactly because you are this SOFT that you think saying such a thing to a girl like I posted above wouldn't be cool, but the fact of the matter is, that IS COOL, I HAVE tested such lines, they DO work, and if our boy here takes YOUR advice, he's gonna lose the girl because the guys like me who have to BALLS to say what we want "You're coming to the prom with me." will take the girl to the prom, without a first or second date, and leave you in the company of some ugly chick you don't want to go with or with Mary Palm and her five sisters.

 

[The Deacon]

Should I ask her to prom? I was going to ask her on a date for this coming weekend, but then I thought about prom. I guess I should ask somebody soon, since prom is coming up quickly, but would it be too AFC to ask her? The timing of all of this is really horrible. Is it ok to just say "do you want to go to prom with me?" I never ask for date like that, but I don't think a "I'm going to prom, you should come along" would work here...lol

How is the timing horrible? She's a transfer student, and she's probably feeling a little anxious about being in a new school. Is there a better way to make her school transfer enjoyable than to have a studly dude like you ask her to the prom? I think not.

I highly suggest you develop some rapport with her before you ask her. You don't need to be like, best friends with her, but you two need to be comfortable enough around each other to have a pleasant conversation. If you say that she's interested, I'm sure you won't have many problems getting her to go to the prom with you after you gain rapport with her. Just don't seek her approval. If you don't know what approval-seeking behavior is, I suggest you read this post in Bristol Lair by Tyler Durden

http://www.bristollair.com/outer-game/techniques/specifics/25-points.html

You're a little too in your head right now, and that's understandable. After all, this site does make you think twice about all conventional dating advice. Here's the thing though: all conventional dating advice (like buying flowers and writing poetry) can work if you're coming from a place of higher value. She's the transfer student, you're the dude who's going to make her feel more comfortable. Capitalize on this. Women will find all sorts of men "cute," but the ones who they end up with are the ones who can take them by the hand and lead them somewhere. Your typical "jerk" already knows how to do this.

Good luck and have fun!

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

Where did you get the impression that that was made up and I never tested it? Secondly I was trying to illustrate the kind of mentality you need to have if you want things to go your way, but from the sound it you're the kind of guy who things it would be better to go on 2 dates to 'establish a sort of dating thing'. It's exactly because you are this SOFT that you think saying such a thing to a girl like I posted above wouldn't be cool, but the fact of the matter is, that IS COOL, I HAVE tested such lines, they DO work, and if our boy here takes YOUR advice, he's gonna lose the girl because the guys like me who have to BALLS to say what we want "You're coming to the prom with me." will take the girl to the prom, without a first or second date, and leave you in the company of some ugly chick you don't want to go with or with Mary Palm and her five sisters.

You might want to reread your first post, as it completely contradicts this one, and secondly, if he doesn't know the girl very well your line is gonna backfire. It's not sly and cool... it screams typical jock, male ass hole, ****y with his friends b.s., that is nothing but a front for an insecure highschool kid who needs the power of his posse to make such lewd comments to a girl he barely knows.

Whatever,
I'm not gonna argue with your genius in picking up women.

 

[NoMoreTapDancing]

Yes but the typical jock, male ass hole, ****y with his friends b.s unfortunately gets women. It's not said in order to be sly or cool, it's said in order to WORK. to GET WHAT YOU ARE AFTER. You call such a comment 'lewd' but yet if 95% of women will actually respond to such behaviour in a positive way and you actually will get what you want, then why take the hard path and try to find a balance by being nice and telling all our stories and going on two dates and wasting time, when we can get what we are all here for, right now, by doing and saying the things that will get it?

 

[ARrocket]

Yeah, we have already built some rapport over the last few days. She is in the school band, and although she plays a different instrument she sits next to me. I ignored her for a few weeks, while flirting with all the other cute girls around us (and let her see that they were all interested in me as well )

This brings up an interesting subject, maybe it needs a whole new thread. What are the differences in the way you interact with a girl that you are trying to get attracted to you, and the girl you already have some rapport with? I never really made a distinction before, I'm the same with all, although with the ones I don't know I'd never say something like "how was your day" or something like that.

 

[The Deacon]

It's not the "jerk" part of being a jerk that's magnetic to women. It's the none-rapport-seeking behavior that typically accompanies it.

Steve Young, the quarterback, is a pretty nice guy. He also can have his pick of the litter too. He's just a nice guy with higher social value. When you have social value, people are consistently seeking approvel from you rather than the other way around.

Try this, if you think women only want jerks. Stop a girl in the hallway and say she is the ugliest thing you have ever seen in your whole life. Make a big scene about it. Then ask her out on a date.

Women only like jerks? That's quite a misinformed oversimplification of social dynamics.

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

Yes but the typical jock, male ass hole, ****y with his friends b.s unfortunately gets women. It's not said in order to be sly or cool, it's said in order to WORK. to GET WHAT YOU ARE AFTER. You call such a comment 'lewd' but yet if 95% of women will actually respond to such behaviour in a positive way and you actually will get what you want, then why take the hard path and try to find a balance by being nice and telling all our stories and going on two dates and wasting time, when we can get what we are all here for, right now, by doing and saying the things that will get it?

I know what you're trying to say and it's true, to an extent, but this mentality isn't healthy over the longterm. It might get some attraction but it won't keep it. He could easily turn her on and off again way before prom if he acts like this, and if it isn't really his "thing".

And by dates, I'm not talking dinner and a movier, some flowers chocolates and that kinda crap. I'm talking any out of school things where they can just hang and he can run his "game" outside of the peer pressures of highschool.

Since hes' got some rapport he just needs to get with her outside of school and take it form there.

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

It's not the "jerk" part of being a jerk that's magnetic to women. It's the none-rapport-seeking behavior that typically accompanies it.

Steve Young, the quarterback, is a pretty nice guy. He also can have his pick of the litter too. He's just a nice guy with higher social value. When you have social value, people are consistently seeking approvel from you rather than the other way around.

Women only like jerks? That's quite a misinformed oversimplification of social dynamics.

That is exactly what I was trying to say. You can be nice and friendly but also have high social value. When people are constantly seeking your approval, and you can still be a great guy you win. The guys think your cool and the girls love you. No ass hole crap, no jerk mentality. But never a push over, either.

 

[crossboss]

That is exactly what I was trying to say. You can be nice and friendly but also have high social value. When people are constantly seeking your approval, and you can still be a great guy you win. The guys think your cool and the girls love you. No ass hole crap, no jerk mentality. But never a push over, either.

Agreed.

 

[The Deacon]

Yeah, we have already built some rapport over the last few days. She is in the school band, and although she plays a different instrument she sits next to me. I ignored her for a few weeks, while flirting with all the other cute girls around us (and let her see that they were all interested in me as well )

Ah. Social proof makes women 100x more receptive to your advances. She may, at first, be a little guarded cause you may be overqualifying yourself. If you're getting positive signals from all the girls in the room she might think you're a player. Catch her in the hallways and ask her when she's at her locker. If you ask her and she's seems a bit uneasy about it, just persist a little bit more. She may think "why is this guy who has all these girls interested in him asking me to the prom?" Tell her that you want to take her cause she's a cool girl and you'd love to accompany her to prom.

You'll do fine. Please, PLEASE, don't avoid asking her to avoid rejection. It's not as big of a deal as you think.

 

[ARrocket]

Hmmm you guys seem to have had some fun with my thread lol.

So the general consensus seems to be that I should get her outside of school, continue to amplify her attraction for me, and then ask her to the prom. Right?