Women & Sex

[backbreaker]

Also, on the "women's sexual peak at 30/40/etc" I believe that's less to do with hormones, and more to do with confidence and experience and learning about your body, being comfortable in your body and in the bedroom

I think women who are in their 30 and 40's are just more desperate and are willing to please more. not that complicated to figure out really

you are a 33 year old stock trader, no debt, you take care of yourself, no real baggage, afer that 37 year old has ****ed her way through her 20's, getting drunk and having fun, she might even have a kid now becuase of it, what ****ing (no pun intended) choice does she have but to **** your brains out if she wants to keep you? she's competing with women in the early to mid 20's for this man. she has to **** her way into your heart. literarly. What other card does she ahve to play but the experience card? she knows (usually) she's not as hot as the 24 year old girl at starbucks that keeps flirting with you with the perfect ass

my fiancee is 34 and I'm 27. WE have sex about 3 times a week, i actually turn down sex quite often from her, as if I know for instance I have to get up early in the morning I won't do it if it's late. I'm quite sure we don't **** as much as we do, becuase she's just that horny, while I'm good looking I don't give myself that much credit.

She knows, if we aren't ****ing, i'm gone lol. I'm eligible enough and she knows it, where I can find someone who will **** me.

I wouldn't call it desperation, I would call it ensuring your assets. A man has needs, it's your womans job to make sure they are met. the fact that she is horny or not is of no real consequence, women cut it on when they need to, that's all you need to know.

There are a few times I mean often but not like every other day, like a few times a month when I can tell she is just really, really actually, horny. But more often than not it's maintence ****ing. good maintence****ing, but maintence****ing never the less

 

[backbreaker]

Some great points here.

One should definitely separate out the "horny sex" from the "keep my guy sex".

Two VERY different things. As Rollow and Taiyo say....the science is what it is. Coming up with alternatives to the majority of the situation does not change the main theme.

I would even say that the "keep your man sex" fits in with the way that older women attempt to compete with the young attractive more fertile competitors. Use this to your advantage.

which is exactly why, if i am ever single again, while i am sure i can snag women younger than me i will not shame older women.

1. they are more interesting to talk to
2. they will **** your brains out, out of necessity



the only thing is, dont' mistake them ****ing your brains out, as them being horiner or having more sex drive. they have more "keep my man drive"

 

[CuriousGirl]

I think women who are in their 30 and 40's are just more desperate and are willing to please more. not that complicated to figure out really

you are a 33 year old stock trader, no debt, you take care of yourself, no real baggage, afer that 37 year old has ****ed her way through her 20's, getting drunk and having fun, she might even have a kid now becuase of it, what ****ing (no pun intended) choice does she have but to **** your brains out if she wants to keep you? she's competing with women in the early to mid 20's for this man. she has to **** her way into your heart. literarly. What other card does she ahve to play but the experience card? she knows (usually) she's not as hot as the 24 year old girl at starbucks that keeps flirting with you with the perfect ass

my fiancee is 34 and I'm 27. WE have sex about 3 times a week, i actually turn down sex quite often from her, as if I know for instance I have to get up early in the morning I won't do it if it's late. I'm quite sure we don't **** as much as we do, becuase she's just that horny, while I'm good looking I don't give myself that much credit.

She knows, if we aren't ****ing, i'm gone lol. I'm eligible enough and she knows it, where I can find someone who will **** me.

I wouldn't call it desperation, I would call it ensuring your assets. A man has needs, it's your womans job to make sure they are met. the fact that she is horny or not is of no real consequence, women cut it on when they need to, that's all you need to know.

There are a few times I mean often but not like every other day, like a few times a month when I can tell she is just really, really actually, horny. But more often than not it's maintence ****ing. good maintence****ing, but maintence****ing never the less

But surely she wants to have sex because she wants to have sex, because she's horny, I don't know why someone would initiate sex when they're not in the mood themselves. There's putting effort into a relationship and compromise but then there's being who you're not, and I don't think thats a good thing.

I'm guessing you'll all call me naive but I'm getting the feeling one type of girl/woman is always being described in this forum, and yeah this type of woman exists and we're not short of them but there are normal and balanced women out there too. Same with relationships, it seems that most of the users want a relationship where you are in control and pulling the strings because the other option is that she's in control and pulling the strings. But I don't see why you wouldn't want the option of both being on the same level, to me thats the only option for a serious relationship.

 

[Tazman]

I think women who are in their 30 and 40's are just more desperate and are willing to please more. not that complicated to figure out really

you are a 33 year old stock trader, no debt, you take care of yourself, no real baggage, afer that 37 year old has ****ed her way through her 20's, getting drunk and having fun, she might even have a kid now becuase of it, what ****ing (no pun intended) choice does she have but to **** your brains out if she wants to keep you? she's competing with women in the early to mid 20's for this man. she has to **** her way into your heart. literarly. What other card does she ahve to play but the experience card? she knows (usually) she's not as hot as the 24 year old girl at starbucks that keeps flirting with you with the perfect ass

my fiancee is 34 and I'm 27. WE have sex about 3 times a week, i actually turn down sex quite often from her, as if I know for instance I have to get up early in the morning I won't do it if it's late. I'm quite sure we don't **** as much as we do, becuase she's just that horny, while I'm good looking I don't give myself that much credit.

She knows, if we aren't ****ing, i'm gone lol. I'm eligible enough and she knows it, where I can find someone who will **** me.

I wouldn't call it desperation, I would call it ensuring your assets. A man has needs, it's your womans job to make sure they are met. the fact that she is horny or not is of no real consequence, women cut it on when they need to, that's all you need to know.

There are a few times I mean often but not like every other day, like a few times a month when I can tell she is just really, really actually, horny. But more often than not it's maintence ****ing. good maintence****ing, but maintence****ing never the less

Aside from the main point, this pretty much says it all, good insight.

I'm guessing you'll all call me naive

Your age and explanations are self explanatory.

 

[backbreaker]

But surely she wants to have sex because she wants to have sex, because she's horny,
I'm guessing you'll all call me naive but I'm getting the feeling one type of girl/woman is always being described in this forum, and yeah this type of woman exists and we're not short of them but there are normal and balanced women out there too. Same with relationships, it seems that most of the users want a relationship where you are in control and pulling the strings because the other option is that she's in control and pulling the strings. But I don't see why you wouldn't want the option of both being on the same level, to me thats the only option for a serious relationship.

I don't know why someone would initiate sex when they're not in the mood themselves. There's putting effort into a relationship and compromise but then there's being who you're not, and I don't think thats a good thing.

my fiancee does not work, drives a convertable mercedes, gets no slack from me when she wants to go out with the gals (i'm not insecure), has a pantry full of food and her man is pretty damn good looking if i say so myself. you figure it out.


I realize reading your post that, women dont' even understand women. and i'm dead serious.

if I told my fiancee what i just said she would say "babe we have sex becuse I am into you, which she is, i know that, but i wake up, go to sleep thinking about ****ing.

better stated, if she walked in here right now and just pulled my **** out and started giving me a hummer i would not stop her. i dont' care the time of day, i dont care what i am doing. i'm down for sex. i'm a man.

if i went into the kitchen, pulled her pants down and started going down on her, there are times, while she's cooking, if one of her best friends pissed her off, if her parents are going at it. she has to be in the "mood". every guy here has heard that before. while she's putting my sons clothes on, while she's on the phone, that she would say "stop"

it doesn't mean she isn't into me, it just means she isn't wired the same. she isnt' always about sex. while i dont' go around chasing sex, i can only run so fast from it lol.

 

[Kailex]

But surely she wants to have sex because she wants to have sex, because she's horny, I don't know why someone would initiate sex when they're not in the mood themselves. There's putting effort into a relationship and compromise but then there's being who you're not, and I don't think thats a good thing.

You're only 19 dear.
Backbreaker is talking about someone in their 30's. It'll be impossible for you to relate until you are at that point.

Once you get up there, you'll realize that a LOT of people initiate sex when they are not in the mood.

Come back in about 15 years and let us know how this turned out for you.

I'm guessing you'll all call me naive but I'm getting the feeling one type of girl/woman is always being described in this forum, and yeah this type of woman exists and we're not short of them but there are normal and balanced women out there too. Same with relationships, it seems that most of the users want a relationship where you are in control and pulling the strings because the other option is that she's in control and pulling the strings. But I don't see why you wouldn't want the option of both being on the same level, to me thats the only option for a serious relationship.

No matter how much you want to think of a relationship as a 50/50, there is NO such thing. There is always some uneven distribution SOMEWHERE in the relationship. I've yet to see any relationship where both the man and woman had equal control within it, whether it be emotional or financial. It just doesn't happen, and if it does, it's an exception. And exceptions only prove the rule.

Men are EXPECTED to lead and should be leading.

Yes, there are normal and balanced women out there, but normal and balanced is subjective to each person and as far as this board is concerned, they are exceptions as well, which still do indeed prove the rule.

 

[CuriousGirl]

my fiancee does not work, drives a convertable mercedes, gets no slack from me when she wants to go out with the gals (i'm not insecure), has a pantry full of food and her man is pretty damn good looking if i say so myself. you figure it out.


I realize reading your post that, women dont' even understand women. and i'm dead serious.

if I told my fiancee what i just said she would say "babe we have sex becuse I am into you, which she is, i know that, but i wake up, go to sleep thinking about ****ing.

better stated, if she walked in here right now and just pulled my **** out and started giving me a hummer i would not stop her. i dont' care the time of day, i dont care what i am doing. i'm down for sex. i'm a man.

if i went into the kitchen, pulled her pants down and started going down on her, there are times, while she's cooking, if one of her best friends pissed her off, if her parents are going at it. she has to be in the "mood". every guy here has heard that before. while she's putting my sons clothes on, while she's on the phone, that she would say "stop"

it doesn't mean she isn't into me, it just means she isn't wired the same. she isnt' always about sex. while i dont' go around chasing sex, i can only run so fast from it lol.

Yeah I see what you mean. But then not all guys are the same and not all girls are the same, there are some who are just as horny and there are guys who aren't as horny. And girls might also hear guys saying they aren't in the mood. But yeah I do agree with you that generally guys have a higher sex drive than women, I just don't agree with the notion that women can't have a high sex drive, or that if they do it's because of abuse or mental illness as has been suggested, I think that's pretty closed-minded to the human mind and body.

Also, why is she wearing your son's clothes?! Lol

 

[backbreaker]

i meant to say dressing my son. i can't walk in there and say pull down your pants.

lol, if she came in here and told me to pull out my pants i would go in the bathroom and change the TV to cartoons, son wouldn't have a clue lol

 

[Lexington]

I'd have to agree that men are on the whole more desiring of sex than women. Biologically speaking, sperm is incredibly cheap, whereas eggs are extremely expensive. A man wastes millions of sperm cells throughout his lifetime just jerking off. A woman is born with all the eggs she will ever have.

Prior to the advent of reliable contraception, sex was a much bigger deal for women. A man doesn't have to worry about carrying a baby for 9 months for one night's fun. In most mammalian species (including our own), it is the male who must strive to attain sex, whereas the female pretty much just has to be there.

I think the best proof is the porn industry. It's a billion dollar business. But how much porn is intended for a female audience? 99% of all porn is for straight or gay males. Finally, you also have to consider how easy it is for a man to obtain an orgasm. A very significant percentage of women haven't experienced orgasms. For most guys, experiencing an orgasm is the easiest thing in the world. In fact, it's so easy that we have to try and delay them.

That being said however, women are a lot hornier than the popular notions of society hold. Women tend to be portrayed as these angelic creatures that are only interested in love and intimacy, while men are horny dogs that just want sex. Women love sex too, perhaps not as much as men, but they do have a strong biological desire to be fvcked.

You have to understand that for most women, attaining sex isn't an issue. A woman doesn't need "game" to get laid. She can just dress nice and it's almost guaranteed that she will be hit on. All but the best looking guys have to make an effort to get laid. You will notice however that the uglier girls tend to be hornier than the very attractive ones.

We always want what is difficult to attain. For men, sex is something that has to be earned. We are the ones that have to make the courtship happen. For decent looking women, sex pretty much just falls right into their laps.

 

[CuriousGirl]

You're only 19 dear.
Backbreaker is talking about someone in their 30's. It'll be impossible for you to relate until you are at that point.

Once you get up there, you'll realize that a LOT of people initiate sex when they are not in the mood.

Come back in about 15 years and let us know how this turned out for you.



No matter how much you want to think of a relationship as a 50/50, there is NO such thing. There is always some uneven distribution SOMEWHERE in the relationship. I've yet to see any relationship where both the man and woman had equal control within it, whether it be emotional or financial. It just doesn't happen, and if it does, it's an exception. And exceptions only prove the rule.

Men are EXPECTED to lead and should be leading.

Yes, there are normal and balanced women out there, but normal and balanced is subjective to each person and as far as this board is concerned, they are exceptions as well, which still do indeed prove the rule.

I will, I'll let you know, if I remember my password.

Both my parents have pretty well-balanced relationships, and on similar wages now that you mention that, which I didn't think was that important. But I can see what you mean about it not being very common, when I talk to my hairdresser and bosses and stuff about their relationships you can see which are working and which aren't a la 'same ****, different couple'.

 

[CuriousGirl]

i meant to say dressing my son. i can't walk in there and say pull down your pants.

lol, if she came in here and told me to pull out my pants i would go in the bathroom and change the TV to cartoons, son wouldn't have a clue lol

LOL surely you'd be horrified if she was up for you likcing her out when your son's right there in the room!? How old is he?!

yeah that's fine, just not in the same room!

 

[Blue Phoenix]

Well I don´t think people f* merely because of hormones.

Some women have sex for various reasons:

She wants sex because she wants to control a man
She confuses sex with love
She´s addicted to sex like a drug
She wants sex because she´s angry
She wants sex because she wants to feel desirable
She wants sex to distract herself
She wants sex because she´s horny (ok, no surprise here)!
And so forth.

 

[Mr.Positive]

I think Rollo has some very strong points, however I think estrogen levels have a lot to do with a woman's desire for sex.

While women may not appear to have stronger sex drives, I believe sex, in itself, is a more powerful experience for women. Based upon true animal attraction, women seem to have an out of body/mind experience on a whole other level then men. It's just hidden, and if that true attraction is there, it can be unlocked.

For example, one gal I was with, we had that raw animal attraction. I could unlock almost anytime I wanted to actually. She didn't pursue sex much, but her estorgen was no match for my testosterone. It was the perfect balance, all I had to do was initiate it, and push the right buttons, and the clothes were flying off.

Of course, her estrogen levels were so high I think it had a lot to do with major emotional swings she'd have, etc.

I think there's a lot more to it, and I'll be the first to say that this is just my thoughts on it. I'd like to hear others thoughts on estrogen levels and women's sexual drives.

 

[zekko]

Obviously men are more into sex, generally speaking.
But if anyone here is trying to say that women are not interested in sex, do not want sex, do not get horny, or only tolerate sex to hang onto their man, that is just wrong. All my experience in life tells me this is simply not the case.

 

[backbreaker]

LOL surely you'd be horrified if she was up for you licking her out when your son's right there in the room!? How old is he?!

yeah that's fine, just not in the same room!

almost 2 and a half.

he sleeps by himself. he did walk in on us 'wrestling' about a month ago, he peed in the the bed and came running into our room. i was like dude you have pee pee all on you why are you jumping in my bed.


blue phoenix hit the nail on the head. just becuase a woman ****s you, doesn't mean she wants to have sex with you. having sex with someone, can have nothing to do with her wanting to have sex with you.


as alot know, i am a recovering addict. lots of women have sex for drugs, that don't' call themselves prostitutes. in reality, the situation is no different, then what goes on in everyday marriage. you have something i want, i will give you access to my virgina, in return for what you have of value. not even women just sitting on the street. when i was in my addiction tyhere were 2-3 (good looking) women i could call up and would drop what they were doing and would come and we would "kick it". i doubt it was me they were interested in but would give it up left and right willingly, without me even asking. they weren't attracted to me.

you will say, that's idfferent. no it's not.

i remember, i used to sale cars. this ass licking hot woman, to this day, one of the top 3 prettiest women i have ever seen in my life with my own two eyes, just, perfection, guy was about 15 years older, had money. sold them a infiniti G35 coupe for her, the price was about 100 a mont higher than he wanted to pay, he looked at her, in front of me and said "we are definatly having sex tonight".

it was a joke.. but not so much. i'm quite sure he got laid. and i'm quite sure she ****ed his brains out becuase of that transtion

 

[davewe]

That being said however, women are a lot hornier than the popular notions of society hold. Women tend to be portrayed as these angelic creatures that are only interested in love and intimacy, while men are horny dogs that just want sex. Women love sex too, perhaps not as much as men, but they do have a strong biological desire to be fvcked.

You have to understand that for most women, attaining sex isn't an issue. A woman doesn't need "game" to get laid. She can just dress nice and it's almost guaranteed that she will be hit on. All but the best looking guys have to make an effort to get laid. You will notice however that the uglier girls tend to be hornier than the very attractive ones.

We always want what is difficult to attain. For men, sex is something that has to be earned. We are the ones that have to make the courtship happen. For decent looking women, sex pretty much just falls right into their laps.

I think this is the best point in the thread and I'm disappointed that it had to come from a 25-year old! I know of no one who believes in the "myth" that women like sex as much as or more than men, but I know many people who believe the "myth" that women are angelic mothers who only want sex to bear children or to keep their husbands at home. I think that's a myth we have to explode. No one genuinely believes that a 35 year old woman is as horny as a 17 year old man, but she is horny. In our parents day that was hard to admit.

 

[backbreaker]

both of you have problems with using extreme situations.

of course women ****ing get turned on. there would not be a chip n dales if woman did not like sex. no one has suggested otherwise (Whcih is actually ironically, my fiancee would do, use an extreme to try to prove a point).

i am sure rollo, myself, and everyone else here would tell you that women like sex.

what we are saying, is that they don't like sex as much as we do (men) and there are times, a woman will have sex with a man, to accommodate him, not becuase she wants it and conversely, there is not ever a time a man doesn't want it.

use simple math. if Backbraker wants sex 3 times a week and fiancee only really gets horny 3 or so times a month, if we are ****ing 12 times a month, and backbreakers fiancee really only wants it 3, maybe 4 times a month (the avg woman would be more than content ****ing 4 times a month), then 9 times of the month we are matinence ****ing. yesterday I got home from the gym, took a shower and my son was in his room sleep (Still), we got a quickie in in that time frame, 1000% initiated by me. i was ****ing horny.

it's not like she was grunting her teeth the entire time or anything or hated it. i'm sure she enjoyed it (at least i hope so lol, well at least as much as i did). But that doesn't mean she was horny or wanted to do it in the first place.

the extreme situation you use is that women who have maintenance sex, don't' enjoy the sex. That is not true. you have this picture of a woman at home with a long dress with this old man sitting there beating her u in the bed and she sitting there with this 'god will he get this overw ith look" on her face. That is how women think, in extreme situations. Men have the ability to use rational thinking when dealing with issues.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

I think Rollo has some very strong points, however I think estrogen levels have a lot to do with a woman's desire for sex.

Estrogen does 'control' libido - for men: Estrogen have a look at the Functions section here. And while you're at it you may want to have a look at Testosterone; and in particular this:

Like men, women rely on testosterone to maintain libido, bone density and muscle mass throughout their lives. In men, estrogens simply lower testosterone, decrease muscle mass, stunt growth in teenagers, introduce gynecomastia, increase feminine characteristics, and decrease susceptibility to prostate cancer.

Sexual desire is dependent on androgen levels rather than estrogen levels.

 

[Mr.Positive]

Estrogen does 'control' libido - for men: Estrogen have a look at the Functions section here. And while you're at it you may want to have a look at Testosterone; and in particular this:

I see your point (I think). Thing is we know high testosterone levels increase attraction for men and increased libidos, but again, we are attracted to feminine women. Women with high test, show more masculine traits, however, they are less attractive to 'us', and also more likely to be attracted to women as well...ie, bull dykes.

So, there's a contradiction there as well. Are men with more estrogen more likely to be gay, since they may display more feminine traits?

I'll admit there's a lot on this subject that I just don't know, was never good with science.

It seems to me that estrogen, being a woman's primary sex hormone, must have something to do with her attraction and sex drive towards a man with high testosterone. Hence, what builds that animal attraction I was referring to.

 

[Alle_Gory]

Are men with more estrogen more likely to be gay, since they may display more feminine traits?

Hormone levels don't determine sexual orientation. There's a region of the brain called the sexually dimorphic nucleus that's believed to determine sexual orientation.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexually_dimorphic_nucleus