Women are more narcissistic than men

[Baibars]

A lot of women complain about men and almost all men they had relationships with where narcs.
They also complain about how bad the dating market is and every man has issues.
The thing is, almost none of them recognize their own issues and since they get all the attention despite their shortcomings, they probably just assume that they are perfect. They think they can’t be the problem, it’s always outside.

isn’t that ironically a trait of a narc?

 

[RangerMIke]

All people are at least a little narcissistic, if we weren't we would not have the ability to discern what is good or bad for us. A completely selfless person would be an abject failure in life.... be a victim... getting used by others.

So when a relationship goes side-ways, naturally both parties in the relationship claim the other was a narcissist. Why? Because when relationships fail, it is because one or both in that relationship stop compromising and giving... i.e. becoming more selfish. Selfishness is not a bad trait.

Where narcissism becomes a problem is when a narcissist divorces themselves from reality. You can ignore reality, but you cannot ignore the impact of ignoring reality.

 

[BaronOfHair]

"Women are more narcissistic than men"

Feel free to sob over this, along with the realization that water is wet, and that getting a chest full of 5.56 mm rounds will likely result in your pulse being no more

 

[BaronOfHair]

So when a relationship goes side-ways, naturally both parties in the relationship claim the other was a narcissist. Why?

Because resorting to therapy speak is, in the short term, much easier than articulating our thoughts and desires in Plain Language

Ex: "She's such a f-cking narcissist"

vs

"I prefer an SO who isn't regularly undergoing plastic surgery, and in the process disfiguring herself to degrees which make Megan Fox look sane. I'm disappointed and sorrowful that our current social climate is one in which many women are going overboard on plastic surgery"

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

I know a lot of men who are more narcissistic than women. I haven't counted, though, so I'd be hesitant to call one gender more narcissistic than the other.

I think it's more individually determined and people tend to project a lot when making psychological assessments.

Whenever any separation was acrimonious, both sides love to proclaim the other to be a 'narcissist' or 'psycho'.

 

[Vanderdonck]

Put the device down and go outside.

 

[Baibars]

Put the device down and go outside.

that’s what I observe regularly when I talk or meet someone. It usually happens outside. When things didn’t work out I rarely see a woman recognizing her own shortcomings.

 

[Vanderdonck]

that’s what I observe regularly when I talk or meet someone. It usually happens outside. When things didn’t work out I rarely see a woman recognizing her own shortcomings.

Ah. I've seen it sometimes among both sexes but also know plenty of self-aware people. Personally I accept and love myself 100% but know I'm not perfect. I also don't excuse bad behavior from others. But instead of complaining or lamenting I reason that if my boundaries mean someone goes bye bye, then I'm doing it right. Their faults are their problem (or not).

E.g. there are times when I lament a couple of toxic exes and what psychos they were, but the REAL lament is that I didn't respect myself more and cut it off sooner. Alas, we live and learn.

 

[Baibars]

Ah. I've seen it sometimes among both sexes but also know plenty of self-aware people. Personally I accept and love myself 100% but know I'm not perfect. I also don't excuse bad behavior from others. But instead of complaining or lamenting I reason that if my boundaries mean someone goes bye bye, then I'm doing it right. Their faults are their problem (or not).

E.g. there are times when I lament a couple of toxic exes and what psychos they were, but the REAL lament is that I didn't respect myself more and cut it off sooner. Alas, we live and learn.

I give you an example. I’m a father of a daughter and when I date someone seriously after sometimes the questions why it didn’t work out between me and my kids mother pops up.
I tell women that I was too young and wasn’t able to be a responsible family family at that time etc. and that we just weren’t a good fit.

When i ask single mothers or just women in general what made them end relationships or divorce their exes it’s usually a demonnarcissistic man that did this and that just everything evil imaginable.
When I ask them what themselves did wrong they usually can’t tell anything.

I cannot trust such women because I assume that I could turn into that evil man one day. My kids mother has such a hatred against me even though she wasn’t the best person in our relationship too that I’m somewhat paranoid when I encounter a woman that has the same feelings about all of their exes while they are angels that have just been treated poorly.

 

[Vanderdonck]

I give you an example. I’m a father of a daughter and when I date someone seriously after sometimes the questions why it didn’t work out between me and my kids mother pops up.
I tell women that I was too young and wasn’t able to be a responsible family family at that time etc. and that we just weren’t a good fit.

When i ask single mothers or just women in general what made them end relationships or divorce their exes it’s usually a demonnarcissistic man that did this and that just everything evil imaginable.
When I ask them what themselves did wrong they usually can’t tell anything.

I cannot trust such women because I assume that I could turn into that evil man one day. My kids mother has such a hatred against me even though she wasn’t the best person in our relationship too that I’m somewhat paranoid when I encounter a woman that has the same feelings about all of their exes while they are angels that have just been treated poorly.

Just keep nexting. They're telling on themselves. Hopefully you've banged already. Adios, babe.

I have one ex who was terrible but I try not to talk trash about her. If asked I'm honest, mostly, but I think it's bad form to trash someone and a bad sign after so many years - means they're stuck on it.

 

[Clockwerk50]

It seems to reflect a mix of confirmation bias, conviction bias, appearance bias, group bias, and superiority/blame bias.

Ask yourself: Is there a better question you can pose to find evidence that challenges the belief that women are more narcissistic than men? Try formulating a null hypothesis, which will help you arrive at a more rational and objective conclusion.

 

[RangerMIke]

I know a lot of men who are more narcissistic than women.

True. All you have to do is visit a gym.

 

[The Duke]

Psychologists will tell you there are more male narcissists than female. I think its close to 75% male. Men have big ego's and that has a lot to do with it.

I don't discount the belief that women have self-accountability deficiencies, but I don't think this is narcissism. It has more to do with
how little girls are raised and what society expects out of them and how they are commonly pedestalized.

 

[BaronOfHair]

I know a lot of men who are more narcissistic than women

This manifests differently in both genders on average also. The occasional(and aptly named)Karen Straughan or Aly Tieman aside, very few women run around declaring themselves Red Pill. I.E. The possessors of truths which we're previously unknown, and incomprehensible to most of us mere "normies" they've been cursed to share the planet with

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

This manifests differently in both genders on average also.

Perhaps, but this discussion is pretty useless. Everybody on this earth has narcissistic traits.

If you're a heterosexual man, you will probably have to deal with female narcissists more than with male narcissists, unless you're in a job that attracts narcissists.

In the end, it's not which gender has the most narcissistic traits, but how much of these traits are in the woman you want to date. So you should keep your eyes open for 'red flags', but not automatically assume that women are more narcissistic.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

The generalities that get thrown around on this board with no basis to back them up and the people who throw them around treating it like gospel is honestly stunning to me.

Where do people come up with this? As if their exceptionally small sample size of women they have dated and known can somehow lead to making a generality for the entire population of women.

And honestly, if that's the type of women you are attracting, maybe that says more about you. If you keep finding the same thing with many different people the only constant in this equation is YOU.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

And honestly, if that's the type of women you are attracting, maybe that says more about you. If you keep finding the same thing with many different people the only constant in this equation is YOU.

Indeed, the same goes for people whose exes are all 'NPD' or 'BPD' or 'Psycho'. I already wrote in another thread that you attract what you are. When my dark triad traits were more obvious in my younger years, I attracted my share of dark triad trait women, but when I cleaned up my act and matured, the quality of the women I dated also improved.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Women are more solipsistic than men. Fixed it for you OP.

 

[jhonny9546]

I don't know much about narcisism but there are some women who feel like they have to have something wrong, something broken, or something that breaks, so that they can fix it or find a way to make it work.

These are the same women who, when they have fixed it or found a way to make it work, are not happy and look for something broken again to repeat the process.

I see this dynamic in relationships where they seek a "childish" man who perhaps forgets things, is not responsible, and whom she constantly has to remind. Or, to cite an example of a relationship with children, there are mothers who find defects in their children, even when the children are very healthy or do not have any issues—such as a bump on the foot or a blister on the arm. I asked myself what kind of women they are and whether or not they are suitable for a LTR. For example, My mother was and still like this.

 

[Fruitbat]

You may be misunderstanding.

women are WAY more self interested towards their men.

They are in my opinion, less narcissistic towards their children.

God, a concept I very loosely believe in, replace with evolution where necessary, made women love their kids and men love their women.

women do not love you like you love them. Period. Period is ironic here is it’s the thing they want you to vanquish.

You will never get a woman to love you like you love them. Maybe if your sperm is so high quality, the sexy son hypotheses, this might be true. For the rest of us, don’t expect women to show you the care and attention you show them. That’s how it works.

They will always put themselves and their kids above you. That’s your job, to provide and sacrifice. Rejoice in it, we all have a role in life and ours is to provide and sacrifice. You might want it different, but the only woman who will give you the love you need is your mother.

To them, you are a tool, a commodity, to help her navigate the world. To you, she is an exciting plaything, an Xbox on steroids.

play the role and be the best tool you can be, you will be rewarded. When you cannot fulfil your role, you will be as vulnerable as she is when she cannot fulfil your fantasy. You see as we mock the woman who rages at men, the woman with the ugly face and fat, unattractive body. She is just a victim of evolution as the man who can’t provide. It isn’t fair but it’s life.

if you don’t think it’s fair, marry the fat ugly feminist. Break your mould and your evolutionary traits. No? Didn’t think so. In which case accept she will only be yours for as long as you can give her what she needs.

you have 200 million years of evolution to argue with. For me, I just try to do what I gotta do. It sucks, but it’s how it is.