Men have complained about the same thing to me when I declined the second date.
I mean on the surface, everything looked great!
He was good-looking, great job, social standing was good, we got on well.
However what was missing was mutual chemistry, a certain "energy," that vibe, that click that goes beyond the superficial (looks, job, status).
I can certainly feel when that mutual chemistry is there, it's obvious and it's effortless.
For men, from experience it's more about a woman's appearance, if she's hot, he's in!
For many women (not all) it goes deeper than that, and many women like myself can sense when that mutual chemistry/energy is there or not. It's unmistakable!
And when it's not, despite all his efforts, there will be no second date.
And the interesting thing is when that mutual chemistry and energy is genuine and real, a man doesn't actually have to do a damn thing, but simply exist in our presence.
All the effort he's putting in attempting to escalate, turn on us or whatever can seem contrived, trying too hard.
Which can have the opposite effect, and turn us off.
EDIT: This may sound odd, but I am able to feel that energy/chemistry on line prior to the meet. It happened that way with hubs and a couple of men before him.
I lost count of how many men I chatted with, attractive men, successful etc.
Yet he (hubs) was only the second man I wanted to meet in person; we clicked in person immediately!
We chatted and built rapport for nearly two weeks. There was teasing and playful banter, however there was no overt sexual talk prior to meeting.
We both felt it though, the tension, which made it all the more intriguing and exciting when we finally met in person.
Just let it happen guys, naturally and organically. No pushing, attempting to escalate, trying too hard to make something happen.
Again that can seem phony and contrived and have the opposite effect of what you're trying to achieve.
Jmo fwiw.
