Why does everyone say looks don't matter? they do!

00Kevin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 16, 2003
Messages
1,962
Reaction score
20
Location
toronto
Originally posted by violator

I think that women have this same practical attitude when it comes to relationships. Many would prefer a reliable stable guy (average but not ugly looking) as opposed to a super hot model type that they equate to as a player or unreliable or just trouble for a relationship.
lol. women are not practical at all. Women are superficial and materialistic creatures.
 

Sisko

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 17, 2003
Messages
257
Reaction score
1
Well you forget a couple of very important points...

1. My 9 can be your 6.
2. In my experience ... looks matter to an extent (they will only give you an interview with a girl much easier) then it is up to personality.

All I can say from experiene is that now I look the same physically as before some time ago... but have much more succes with girls thanks to the sosuave ;)
 

TheInfamousCBear

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 7, 2002
Messages
705
Reaction score
2
Age
41
Location
The World In My Eyes
Originally posted by Blaster
Hypothetically speaking, if brad pitt, leo dicaprio, or tom cruise weren't actors nor rich (just regular pretty boys), I'm sure women would still choose them over any John smith with amazing personality, and superior confidence........ Am I wrong?
This post is so pathetic...

1. You swear that every girl in the world loves these dudes...
2. Only girls are concerned with who looks better than who...
3. Girls like more than just looks when it comes to men..

Stop thinking about sh1t like this and just get out there and do something...Make yourself look the best you can and fukk what people say...Sure there are dudes who look better than me, some girls give me between 7-9, and some girls say im 5 and under, but I dont give a fukk about their ratings and I certainly dont give a fukk about other dudes looking better than me, cause they cant do what I do and I cant do what they do either...They arnt sh1t anyways...Thats how you have to see it...

Work on yourself, get your sh1t right, and then everything will come to you, fukk what some b1tch says or thinks...I used to be the same way, but since I got better clothes and got bigger from working out (180 lbs to 220-250 lbs) I can hang with the best of them...Thats all you have to do....Plus if a girl likes you, she will go, if she doesnt, she doesnt like you, but who the fukk cares....I got bills to pay...Im more scared of defaulting on a loan than worrying (sp?) about if some b1tch thinks im hot, cause I know im hot sh1t...Thats how all the dudes in here should feel...
 

Juan_Man

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 3, 2001
Messages
1,103
Reaction score
28
Here we go with another "Do Looks Matter?" post.

I just have one word for all of you average-at-best looking guys (like myself): indifference.

I'm a 21 year old, 5'10'', 150 lbs. black male with a babyface. Not a stud by any means but I've grown to care less. Life for me was a b!tch in my adolescence, but even when I felt like the elephant man, I still had missed opportunities with hot girls. But they only came when I didn't care about my looks. The less you worry about your looks, the less others will also. Just don't be an AFC.

One more thing: Janet Jackson is dating the 5'4'' Jermaine Dupri. 'Nuff said. You can't even say it's about fame and money either because Janet is ten times more widely known and ten times wealthier than that guy.
 
Last edited:

becker

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 13, 2003
Messages
1,697
Reaction score
4
Originally posted by violator


How many super HB's do you see arm in arm with average at best or even slightly ugly looking guys? I am a good observer and honestly I see more HB's with average looking guys than with good looking guys.

I think that women have this same practical attitude when it comes to relationships. Many would prefer a reliable stable guy (average but not ugly looking) as opposed to a super hot model type that they equate to as a player or unreliable or just trouble for a relationship. Honestly, I have had girls tell me that they would not want a serious relationship with me because I convey a player image as the result of my looks.

I would much prefer to have an LTR with a 7 who has a great personality than a 9 who is high maintenance and has no personality.

While it's true that I've certainly seen HBs with average guys, but I don't know about whether that's because they have a practical attitude.

I think that the girl might actually find some guys more attractive than you might think. For example, I remember when I was younger in junior high/high school and some girls I knew would be all infatuated with some guy, and I'd look at him and say "why?" However, it was mainly because I didn't think the guy was too good looking, but most of the time these girls actually thought he was. I think sometimes we see someone at first glance and they're not that good looking, but if you look at them enough, they actually aren't that terrible.

Another example are some famous people, like, say Howard Stern. I mean, the guy isn't that great looking it seems at first glance, but if you look closer, he's actually not that bad. It sometimes just takes a while to absorb it I guess.

Also, I'd certainly feel ok in a LTR with a 7 rather than a HB9 who is major high maintenance, but do these things really have to be mutually exclusive? Certainly there are HB9s out there who are NOT high maintenance, but they're either taken or else they are difficult to find. You just need to search harder. This last girl that I was chasing for some time had a BF, but she was one of these who was a HB9 and not high maintenance.

If you're good looking, in general, as long as you have some personality (doesn't have to be that much) you're going to get women.
 

Well I'm here to tell you there is such a magic wand. Something that will make you almost completely irresistible to any woman you "point it" at. Something guaranteed to fill your life with love, romance, and excitement.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

drZaius09

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 24, 2002
Messages
1,358
Reaction score
3
Location
MA
Originally posted by icepick
Hey Zaius, what's your problem man? You think you are ugly and use that as an excuse to not talk to girls? What? I don't get it? You are always the guy who jumps up in discussions like this talking about how good looking folks have all that they need.
Whoa, calm down there, Studley. First of all, despite your attempts to make this personal, this isn't about me, or you, or anyone else in this discussion. It's about the fallacious notion floating around this board that successful manipulation of DJ tricks and tips can overcome lack of physical attraction. Without physical attraction, YOU HAVE NOTHING. What does that mean? It means that if a specific woman does not find you physically appealing, there is NOTHING you can do to attract her to you. Certain women find certain looks appealing, which would logically suggest that nearly *every* man, with enough approaches under his belt, will eventually find at least *one* woman who finds him visually acceptable.

Let me put it to you this way: I can easily argue that adding fertilizer to soil will help a plant to grow, but without WATER, you're staring into an empty pot. In this example, "water" is your looks and "fertilizer" is your attitude. Some plants, like cacti, need very little water to grow. These are the guys with a god-given ability to attract women with little assistance from their physical appearance. I wish we could *all* be cacti, but that's just not the way it works. Sorry. The good news is that everyone has a *little* bit of water, some more than others, but we all have enough to make a sprout. Perhaps if we add plenty of fertilizer our chances will improve; but you can't ignore the basics.
 

iqqi

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 27, 2003
Messages
5,136
Reaction score
82
Location
Beyond your peripheral vision
Looks are just a tool. they are a hook. that's it. only superficial people will fall for superficial features line and sinker as well.

having said that, there are other tools. humor. eye contact. social skills. dancing ability. you name it. looks fall into that. if you don't have the best looks, whatever, cuz someone else might not have your humor.

looks are just a tool.

if you don't have looks, work on your other tools. your other "hooks".

and get over it. seriously.

you're MEN. you're not supposed to be PRETTY!
 

racerX

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 27, 2003
Messages
142
Reaction score
0
Age
59
Location
los angeles
"You have to have looks to meet them & $$$ to keep them"-thats an old saying about hotties. Sure we all see normal looking dudes w/ babes sometimes, but they are probably just friends. He is not banging her. But maybe he is banging her? Well you will find out he is an investment banker or software developer making $600,000 a year. Hotties want the whole entire package in a dude: success, money, looks, charisma, educated, charm, personality. For ever hottie there are thousands of horny dudes that want to bang them & they know it. Thats why they can be picky.
 

Starman

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 20, 2002
Messages
2,907
Reaction score
6
Location
chicago,il , usa
iqqqqi,

u mentioned "tool" like 500 times..if my c0ck was a tool..it would probably be a drain snake or roto rooter auger

"He is not banging her. But maybe he is banging her?"


HUH???
 

What happens, IN HER MIND, is that she comes to see you as WORTHLESS simply because she hasn't had to INVEST anything in you in order to get you or to keep you.

You were an interesting diversion while she had nothing else to do. But now that someone a little more valuable has come along, someone who expects her to treat him very well, she'll have no problem at all dropping you or demoting you to lowly "friendship" status.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

icepick

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 22, 2002
Messages
650
Reaction score
3
Okay Dr., I gotchya. I just said all that 'personal' stuff to get a reaction out of ya, thats all. ;) No hard feelings.

Ha, ha! Although I do have to laugh...
Originally posted by iqqi
you're MEN. you're not supposed to be PRETTY!
Ain't you the one who made a post about how you were bonkin' some dude who was so good looking that women attacked him on the streets? :D

ANYWAY,

It really doesn't do much good to discuss something that can't be changed. A few years ago, I got really depressed and resigned myself to the fact that I was so ugly that I would not be able to ever find a girl that actually liked me. I had always been really indifferent to women (never calling them, showing no affection, being really nasty, etc.) and I really pissed off a some girl that I was with. Word got back to me that she said that she "Didn't even like me". That messed up my confidence really bad.

So, I sulked around for a year or so. Whenever I went out with friends I would mope and watch a so-called "better looking" friend get molested by chicks, always wishing that I wasn't so 'ugly'.

Then, I kind of "gave up" and got a little happier, finding joy in other things, and began to actually have fun when I went out. Eventually, to my utter surprise, I opened my eyes one day and saw that all these hot chicks were chasing me!

Of course, I had a little fun, and pissed off some more girls, causing them to get pissed and say bad things about me (which I again took to heart,) causing me to "give up" yet again. (Till I feel for some broad and found this website...)

Now, I realize that I am not barred (as I thought) from the room of "beautiful women", and in fact, I am actually a welcome guest. If I never had any stupid "good looks are everything" philosophy floating around in my head ALL THOSE YEARS, then I would have just trusted my instincts and went for all those girls, instead of prejudging myself to not be 'good looking' enough.

I think the whole thing is counterproductive to even discuss. Looks don't matter because the whole 'theory' or 'philosophy' or whatever, should not even be in your head! Imagine if football players agonized over thier own statistics and "ratings" before a game; there would be alot less upsets because the teams would already have decided the match by "rating" or "talent". Besides, nobody can tell you if you are 'good looking' or not, people have vastly different tastes. The closest thing you can get is to see the average girth of the girls that hit on you, the higher it is, the uglier you are! Ha ha!
 

iqqi

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 27, 2003
Messages
5,136
Reaction score
82
Location
Beyond your peripheral vision
Originally posted by icepick


Ha, ha! Although I do have to laugh...
Ain't you the one who made a post about how you were bonkin' some dude who was so good looking that women attacked him on the streets? :D

whatever.

yes. it was a tool. BTW, it was his big bright smile,
MKAAAAY. but it was somethin' else that made me stick around, and not even bail when i found out his issues. plus he is pulling some straight AFC **** right now! hahahahha...

anyways i can also give you examples of men who weren't that great looking that had a hook that pulled me in. and there are many who i didn't find attractive at all at first, who grew on me, to the point where i found them actually beautiful. BEAUTIFUL DAMMIT!
 

Golden Arms

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 6, 2003
Messages
614
Reaction score
6
Location
USA
I can't believe some of you guys.
I had a friend 6 years ago - dude was about 5'5", had a mullet, face full of pimples, huge nose - and wasn't rich. Well, guess what - he was banging a ton of hot chicks. Why ? Cause he approached every girl he saw and was confident.
Some of you guys need to click on the DJ Bible link and read the FAQ. Just like it says - looks and money are nice qualities to have, but personality/charisma are about 90 % of it.
 

Eric Smith

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 8, 2003
Messages
135
Reaction score
0
Age
39
Location
Nowhere
Looks are important to women. Remember, a lot of relationships a girl has needs to be acceptable to her LFN (Local Female Network...I believe these things do actually exist) Ugly guys banging them is a rare occurrence and doesn't happen that often. Once in a while you get the situation like Golden Arms' mullet man but these cases are extremely rare.

Personality/Charisma can only get you so far. As will looks. The key here is combining the two.
 

becker

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 13, 2003
Messages
1,697
Reaction score
4
Originally posted by Golden Arms
I can't believe some of you guys.
I had a friend 6 years ago - dude was about 5'5", had a mullet, face full of pimples, huge nose - and wasn't rich. Well, guess what - he was banging a ton of hot chicks. Why ? Cause he approached every girl he saw and was confident.
Some of you guys need to click on the DJ Bible link and read the FAQ. Just like it says - looks and money are nice qualities to have, but personality/charisma are about 90 % of it.
Probably the only problem with this post is that when you say he was banging a ton of hot chicks, this is very subjective. I personally have pretty high standards as to what a "hot chick" is. I've been around some guys who would point to a girl and say "oh, she's so hot", and I'd look at her and say to myself "what??" I mean, some guys will call a girl hot because she has large breasts, a flat stomach, or some physical characteristic. That's not enough for me, and I look at the entire person to decide. Not everyone does that.

Therefore, by the way you describe your friend, I'm willing to bet that either he's not as ugly as he might seem, or else the girls he was hooking up with were not really that hot.
 

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

becker

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 13, 2003
Messages
1,697
Reaction score
4
Originally posted by BobbDobbs
The only one that matters to is him.
Agreed, and that just goes to the whole beauty is in the eye of the beholder argument. However, at the same time the whole issue here is that looks matter when it comes to everyone.

Also, the reason why it probably matters at all what other people think of the girls this guy has been with is because it helps to clarify the stuff that is said here on this board. Perhaps there are some people on this board who are not so great looking, and they're getting this false sense that despite looking like Quasimodo, they can use their personality and pull off a girl like Cindy Crawford or something, and that's just not going to happen. Wish it weren't the case, but that's reality.

Now, I guess the consolation here is that some of these guys who may not be so physically attractive can find a girl that they find very attractive and may look like a Cindy Crawford in their eyes (but maybe not in the eyes of others) and they can still be happy. That's probably what's most important to see here.

The important thing is to keep things in perspective, that's all, and looks are definitely important in the larger scheme of things.
 

strauss

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 16, 2003
Messages
10
Reaction score
0
I've noticed in my own experience that many times guys who I think are not nearly as good looking as me will get the hot girls. Thus, i have formulated the oppinion that, while looks are important, it matters more how you act than how you look.
 

Golden Arms

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 6, 2003
Messages
614
Reaction score
6
Location
USA
Originally posted by becker
Probably the only problem with this post is that when you say he was banging a ton of hot chicks, this is very subjective. I personally have pretty high standards as to what a "hot chick" is. I've been around some guys who would point to a girl and say "oh, she's so hot", and I'd look at her and say to myself "what??" I mean, some guys will call a girl hot because she has large breasts, a flat stomach, or some physical characteristic. That's not enough for me, and I look at the entire person to decide. Not everyone does that.

Therefore, by the way you describe your friend, I'm willing to bet that either he's not as ugly as he might seem, or else the girls he was hooking up with were not really that hot.
Well, let's put it this way - they were definitely way better looking than he was and nearly all of them were taller.
Sure, he got rejected by a bunch of girls too, but he had his share just by trying all the time and being confident, knowing how to talk to girls, etc..
And I don't think it's a rare occurrence at all. I see very good looking girls with average to ugly looking dudes all the time. And I see good looking guys who don't date any girls at all. Looks are a nice quality to have, as is money, but if you're a guy your personality and/or charisma is what really counts. That is, unless you have a major physical handicap. Read the DJ Bible, it's all there
 
S

Sorthum

Guest
It's not about the looks-- unless you scare livestock, you'll do fine. There's no universal "What women want" out there, any more than there's a universal "What men want." The girl I think is a goddess might well be the sea donkey you can't stand to be around. The reverse of that applies, as well-- every woman wants something different.
 

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

Top