Why do YOU deserve a hot girlfriend?

[PlayHer Man]

OC Speedball your mindset is completely wrong. No one "deserves" a hot woman because women are not "prizes".

Life is not about what you deserve --> Its about what you can get.

Men who understand this go far. Men who don't understand this spend their lives "falling in line" and following other people's rules in hopes that it will "pay off in the long run". These men are the world's toilet paper and they don't even know it. Even worse.. they happily accept the job. This is because the media has trained them from a young age to operate against their own self-interest.. to be the "hero" like Batman and Spider-Man or "Be the nice guy" like in all the chick-flicks.. :crackup: :crackup:

This is the #1 cause of bitterness in men (and women) --> Following rules that ultimately lead to your own failure / doom.

 

[Aristippus]

OC Speedball said : There should be a trade-off, yes. But you both need to be equals.

The idea of "equals" is a myth. No woman that I know of is my equal. I am the leader and have my own good qualities. She may have her own desirable qualities too. Male and female complement each other but in the end the male will, in the majority of cases have more to lose than the woman and more to offer. That's just the way it is (unless he is a complete loser). I'm saying the average, responsible man has more to offer women than the majority of women have to offer him. I've come to this conclusion through observation. The so-called "pick-up artist" does not have this mentality.

There is a difference between knowing your time, energy, and life are valuable and just blindly repeating mantras to try to convince yourself. The womanizer and the pick-up artist come from a point of weakness where they let women define who they are. They are nothing more than weak-minded people who twist and contort themselves to please women while at the same time devaluing themselves. Their fake "bravado" is usually an act intended to get the "prize", which in their head is the pvssy.

But at what cost? You don't have to sacrifice your self-esteem and put up with disrespect and put on a million acts or lie to and con women to get them to like you. This is the problem with the womanizer, player, pick-up artist or whatever you want to call it. In the end, I don't CARE whether or not I am liked other than using her interest in me and tons of other behaviors and qualities to determine whether she's worth my time or a waste of it.


"A trend that I think everyone notices on PUA forums and men's lifestyle forums is that undesirable men think they deserve a hot girl just because they know game."

This "game" you speak of is a band-aid. It's worthless. A superior mindset based on truth and knowledge is 100 times superior to "tricks". You think you need to prove yourself to a woman. That tells me that you need to improve on yourself or that you have an inferior mindset or a combination of the 2. Your weakness is betrayed by the very subcommunication in your statements and questions. And you truly expect me to buy into the same weak-minded paradigm shared by the so-called "nice guy" and the "womanizer"? They are both symptoms of the same weakness. You're like someone speaking a foreign language that I can't understand when you ask me these kinds of questions. Un-cross your wires and do less with the right mindset and then you'll be on the right track.

 

[Smok1nAce]

OC Speedball said : There should be a trade-off, yes. But you both need to be equals.

The idea of "equals" is a myth. No woman that I know of is my equal. I am the leader and have my own good qualities. She may have her own desirable qualities too. Male and female complement each other but in the end the male will, in the majority of cases have more to lose than the woman and more to offer. That's just the way it is (unless he is a complete loser). I'm saying the average, responsible man has more to offer women than the majority of women have to offer him. I've come to this conclusion through observation. The so-called "pick-up artist" does not have this mentality.

There is a difference between knowing your time, energy, and life are valuable and just blindly repeating mantras to try to convince yourself. The womanizer and the pick-up artist come from a point of weakness where they let women define who they are. They are nothing more than weak-minded people who twist and contort themselves to please women while at the same time devaluing themselves. Their fake "bravado" is usually an act intended to get the "prize", which in their head is the pvssy.

But at what cost? You don't have to sacrifice your self-esteem and put up with disrespect and put on a million acts or lie to and con women to get them to like you. This is the problem with the womanizer, player, pick-up artist or whatever you want to call it. In the end, I don't CARE whether or not I am liked other than using her interest in me and tons of other behaviors and qualities to determine whether she's worth my time or a waste of it.


"A trend that I think everyone notices on PUA forums and men's lifestyle forums is that undesirable men think they deserve a hot girl just because they know game."

This "game" you speak of is a band-aid. It's worthless. A superior mindset based on truth and knowledge is 100 times superior to "tricks". You think you need to prove yourself to a woman. That tells me that you need to improve on yourself or that you have an inferior mindset or a combination of the 2. Your weakness is betrayed by the very subcommunication in your statements and questions. And you truly expect me to buy into the same weak-minded paradigm shared by the so-called "nice guy" and the "womanizer"? They are both symptoms of the same weakness. You're like someone speaking a foreign language that I can't understand when you ask me these kinds of questions. Un-cross your wires and do less with the right mindset and then you'll be on the right track.

exactly.

 

[Jitterbug]

There is no "I deserve".

If you can get one, then you'll have one. Whether you deserve that or not by some random moral, ethical, religious or social standard doesn't matter one bit.

 

[plate's_empty]

Because I'm fvcking awesome.

 

[OC Speedball]

Some of the members have made some good points, and a couple still aren't getting it. Feminism is ridiculous and I think we can all agree on that. But the mindset that all women have to offer is their looks is a negative mindset that will hurt you in the long run. You will soon learn that as you progress on your journey.

When I made this post I knew it would get some people upset. As Robyn pointed out on the first page, people are attacking the question rather than answering it. Let me rephrase it once again:

There are millions of men in this world. There are thousands in your area competing with you. Let's say there are two men. One of them is a 5/10 and one of them is a 9/10. Hypothetically, they have the same exact background, experiences, skills, personality and career. Why would a girl go for the 5/10 when she can have all the same qualities, plus the looks, with the 9/10?

Now, I don't mean to generalize, but at the same time I need to for the purpose of this question. Forums such as this one (as much as I love it) and others have men thinking that they should be able to get 9/10's because they are "better" than the guy next to them. The reality is, a lot of these guys don't get the hotties and end up complaining about women in general. If you are a 5 in real life why would a girl go for you when there are thousands of good looking guys in your own area that have the same skills as you if not more.

True, no one deserves anything. Which is exactly what I'm trying to point out. Floyd is correct that self-improvement and hard work would beat out many guys who are lazy. But at the same time, there are still many guys you are competing with. So what sets you apart?

I can't give you numbers, but there is a limited pool of good looking girls, and a limited pool of good looking guys. Psychology shows that, in general, you will end up with a girl near your looks. There are always outliers of course, but this is true for the most part.

If every guy on this planet was coupled with a girl we couldn't all have a hottie. That is a fact. What do you have that sets you apart from the other guys?

 

[( . )( . )]

I deserve a nice girl who's roughly equal to myself in looks because I work hard, pay my taxes and have always played nice by societies rules.
















http://i0.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/004/403/Girls.png

 

[mCas27]

OC Speedball I like your toughs and discussion that you made with your question

 

[Velor]

I do not deserve a hot girlfriend, not yet. But im working on it, I got so much potential to manage.

It's all about working on ourselves in order to achieve the same level of the girl we think we deserve(that, or higher), if I'd stay still and motionless I'd never say I deserve a 10

 

[JoeMarron]

It's a very temporary plus though - it's putting a band-aid on your personality rather than going through the much harder (but more worthwhile) route of gaining real self-confidence.

That's why I said no so much to where you feel you don't need to improve. Delusional self confidence while still improving is better than a man calling himself mediocre. floydb25 I was referring to men in general not you. I don't see the point in a loser dwelling on the fact that he's a loser. Self confidence even to the point of silliness (I'm the greatest man in the universe!) will always be a healthier mindset. I'm not talking about arrogance btw. A man treating everyone as if he's better than them when he clearly isn't is just going to make him look like an idiot. Consider yourself awesome while still striving to be awesome.

 

[Wolfgang D]

This question turned out to be a magnet for those who would rather beat their chests and say "Women should deserve ME! They're all worthless slvts anyway, unlike me!"

It may feel good to post, but it doesn't work at the pub.

Look guys, read the A Dark Heart blog, it has some good tips for what mindset to take. Women are not to be worshipped, but neither are you. Improve.

 

[floydb25]

Hmmmm... Only speaking for myself here... I got your point the first time. I don't complain about not getting hotties, don't feel like I deserve anything, don't "grade" myself, and never approached (due to being a chicken****). The "hotties" always came up to me, which means it's not a big deal. That's my "league"... as you state towards the end of matching in looks & features.

Honestly, due to being unattractive and invisible to women in the school years, it's something I accepted (being a nobody to women), and never felt entitled to or complained about. It just kinda happened once I got into shape and took care of my appearance. If it didn't attract hotties - which was never my intent (just so happened that way; only wanted to be appealing) - it wouldn't have been a big deal, or something I would've thought about. So, all these assumptions are wrong.

Of course, this was in the past, before I started getting fat and lazy again. Plus moving to the rural south.

But even beyond that... just because someone finds you "hot", and in their league - doesn't mean that person is not ****. Many hotties are ****. Beyond a short-term affair - I likely will never get involved with one again. Long-term capability just isn't there with them, and they don't even appeal to me anymore beyond looks. Or losers and *******s who party, get drunk, act stupid, etc (for guys).

Been down there before, and it wasn't very "fun" or "exciting". More like chaotic, heart-wrenching, and depressing. These people aren't "cool" or " sexy", either. They're losers who only think they're better than everyone else - as they judge, belittle, define, and criticize others. As well as categorize by their perceive status. This is what most of those oh-so wonderful hotties are into.

*****es are shallow and dumb... just like all the *******s and pretenders they attract. I never met a hottie who was loyal and faithful, or not heavy into drama and being fake to appeal to the entire universe (and becoming incredibly conceited and stuck up as a result), either.

So, it's quite the opposite of these claims.

Some of the members have made some good points, and a couple still aren't getting it. Feminism is ridiculous and I think we can all agree on that. But the mindset that all women have to offer is their looks is a negative mindset that will hurt you in the long run. You will soon learn that as you progress on your journey.

When I made this post I knew it would get some people upset. As Robyn pointed out on the first page, people are attacking the question rather than answering it. Let me rephrase it once again:

There are millions of men in this world. There are thousands in your area competing with you. Let's say there are two men. One of them is a 5/10 and one of them is a 9/10. Hypothetically, they have the same exact background, experiences, skills, personality and career. Why would a girl go for the 5/10 when she can have all the same qualities, plus the looks, with the 9/10?

Now, I don't mean to generalize, but at the same time I need to for the purpose of this question. Forums such as this one (as much as I love it) and others have men thinking that they should be able to get 9/10's because they are "better" than the guy next to them. The reality is, a lot of these guys don't get the hotties and end up complaining about women in general. If you are a 5 in real life why would a girl go for you when there are thousands of good looking guys in your own area that have the same skills as you if not more.

True, no one deserves anything. Which is exactly what I'm trying to point out. Floyd is correct that self-improvement and hard work would beat out many guys who are lazy. But at the same time, there are still many guys you are competing with. So what sets you apart?

I can't give you numbers, but there is a limited pool of good looking girls, and a limited pool of good looking guys. Psychology shows that, in general, you will end up with a girl near your looks. There are always outliers of course, but this is true for the most part.

If every guy on this planet was coupled with a girl we couldn't all have a hottie. That is a fact. What do you have that sets you apart from the other guys?

 

[Syrio]

It doesn't matter who "deserves" anybody else. Forgive me for getting a bit philosophical here but the term "deserve" implies a greater cause that every social interaction should work towards achieving. If person A "deserves" person "B", the implication is that person A SHOULD be with person B because it helps work towards a greater goal.

No person on earth "deserves" any other person. So to answer your question, I don't think people here believe they "deserve" attractive women... they just WANT to get with attractive women, much like everyone else on the planet. Some find success, some do not, but it's not like the people who do find success are more deserving.

So the bottom line is that I believe your idea of someone "deserving" someone is nonsense. You're confusing "deserve" with "want". Nobody "deserves" anybody. It's a competition - asking someone why they deserve that hot chick in the bar is like asking Chara why he deserves to win the Stanley cup. It doesn't matter if he "deserves" it or not, he's going to try to win it regardless.

 

[Thundernuts]

No person on earth "deserves" any other person. So to answer your question, I don't think people here believe they "deserve" attractive women... they just WANT to get with attractive women, much like everyone else on the planet.

I personally want a 10/10 but I would be ignorant to pass up an 8 who i could actually trust to be in a relationship with. For myself, I have used the forum to discover my flaws in mindset and character and have been undergoing change ever since, not all change has been productive, but hell im getting there. We are all going to shoot for the moon, even if we dont make it we will still be amongst the stars, the only guy who won't get a 10/10 is the guy who does nothing and just waits for the girl who will never come.

As I am now, i will not get a ten, but im on the way. I've started going to college since joining this website and I have one more year before i get my degree. I've been working out too and have lost thirty pounds of fat. I know i deserve something good because I'm going places, and when I get there i will only have more room to keep going forward with my life.

Of course, when it comes to women, having potential in life is like trying to tell the cashier you will pay him tomorrow, chicks want the buff guy at the gym, not the guy who just started working out.

 

[floydb25]

^ IME, the majority of 8's can't be trusted, either. Those are the very cute / hot girls, and usually party, associate with *******s / losers, and **** jump the most. The 10's - and I've only dated 2 - are straight up narcissistic. If you're not innately extremely attractive or well off in other ways (ie, have a lot of money) - good f'n luck even getting their attention.

 

[Jaylan]

Some of the members have made some good points, and a couple still aren't getting it. Feminism is ridiculous and I think we can all agree on that. But the mindset that all women have to offer is their looks is a negative mindset that will hurt you in the long run. You will soon learn that as you progress on your journey.

The bold is very true. And many fail with women because they think this way and go about getting women based solely on her looks.

You find good women by seeking out those other qualities that women have to offer. Basically I look for a girl similar to myself...ie...feisty, in good shape, smart, educated, ambitious, has cool or funky hobbies, empathetic, intellectual, and a wicked sense of humor.

Now on to your original question. Do I deserve a hot girlfriend? Id say I deserve anything I can offer. I take good care of my body and appearance, and a good number of gals will think Im hot. Therefore Id like a girl I find to be hot.

 

[Trump]

There should be a trade-off, yes. But you both need to be equals. She needs to offer you something and you need to offer her something. You cannot simply say, "The mindset to have is that SHE deserves you." That is PUA stuff to help you get confidence. But it's not true unless you are truly of higher value than her.

Equals? Bro she will CRUSH you if she feels you are equals. She has to know you are in charge the whole time. These girls don't care about you, they care about TWO things: money and sex. Other than that, you are nothing to them. You think these girls will stick around if you get sick, go bankrupt, get a disease, be in a wheelchair? Alot of them will disappear the second things get bumpy.

So, you didn't answer the question: why do you deserve a hot girl if you aren't successful and of equal looks as her? Why should an intelligent, succesful, good looking girl go for you? I'm truly curious. A trend that I think everyone notices on PUA forums and men's lifestyle forums is that undesirable men think they deserve a hot girl just because they know game.

Few reasons to the above question: 1) emotional abuse in childhood 2) tv and movies 3) getting top grades 4) saving and making money

The problem is its not a cause and effect thing, because you studied hard and got straight As doesn't mean the hot girl will come, because you have had a hard life and got abused doesn't mean the hot girl will come. Because you have some savings doesn't mean the hot girl will come. And that's why people get so frustrated on here, they do all the right "things" school teaches us, expect how to get to a girls emotions and turn them on.

Damn women!

 

[captain55]

Some of the guys on this forum have a successful career, an adventurous life, and good looks or at least fairly good looks. You would be considered truly "high value."

On the other hand, many of the members on this forum are not so good looking, and they have a dull, routine life. A lot of them think they are alpha simply by reading this website or going to the gym. Yet they still think they deserve high value 8/10's.

There are a limited amount of good looking, high value women in this world. Not everyone can have one, so why do you think you deserve one? I am interested more in the users who fit the latter, but I am curious to hear the mindset on this from both sides.

gene simmons was once asked if when he walked in a room, if he felt he was the best looking guy in the room.
he responded " yes always"
they asked him how he could be so ****y....he said
"what the alternative?"
:rock:

 

[1-800-HellNo]

It's like anything. If your game is good enough, you win.
You want to fvck a dime? practice.
you want to get a 20 kill streak in Halo 4? practice.

learn from your mistakes. every time someone kills you, figure out why, and then think of how to avoid it next time. Use your mistake to your advantage.

Do I think i DESERVE a ten?
ha i don't even want one. i don't give a s#it about girls any more.
i'm fine having sex once every two months, if that's how it has to go down.
usually it's 2 weeks, but i don't even trip if i go longer.

it's like (a good rapper) said, "a b!tch is a b!tch"

 

[Kupid Diggs]

This is BS...

I know plenty of guys that don't deserve hot women, yet they have women dang near fighting tooth and nail for them. These guys are losers, have nothing going for them, but they have hot women all over them...