Why are there so many dudes in the PUA/Game community that don't have their sh*t together?

[Jesse Pinkman]

Over the past few years, I have met a number of guys that do PUA cold approach and follow a lot of PUA content out there themselves. In getting to know a number of these guys, I notice an overarching trend with about 80% of them. The vast majority of these dudes do not have their lives together, especially in a financial and career sort of way.

Like I am talking about dudes over the age of 30 that are unemployed, live with their parents, barely make any money, and do not really have much of a career path. The amount of dudes working odd jobs like busboy at a restaurant or at some fast food place yet going on PUA forums to find when they can go out to sarge. It is like I don't exactly get it. Even when I have gamed while unemployed, it was after having at least a good bit of runway as well as making supplemental income (don't you dare make a joke here @BillyPilgrim lol).

It is like once in a blue moon I might meet a guy who works a White Collar job and does game. Most of the time, this is the story.

1. Dude lives with parents way out in the suburbs

2. Drives out to the city on weekends to do daygame and nightgame sessions

3. Hopes he can sneak girls into his car

Its like are so many PUA coaches having this whole gimmick where they tell guys "I can help you get models while you are broke". It is what eventually turned me off to John Anthony Lifestyle.

 

[BaronOfHair]

What you're describing is true of EVERY vocation on the planet: Lawyers, Doctors, Engineers, Ministers, Teachers, Military Officers, etc etc

80% of those in every profession are either inept, no longer zealous about their work, or criminals. Dating Coaches/men's gurus are no different

 

[Solomon]

Over the past few years, I have met a number of guys that do PUA cold approach and follow a lot of PUA content out there themselves. In getting to know a number of these guys, I notice an overarching trend with about 80% of them. The vast majority of these dudes do not have their lives together, especially in a financial and career sort of way.

Like I am talking about dudes over the age of 30 that are unemployed, live with their parents, barely make any money, and do not really have much of a career path. The amount of dudes working odd jobs like busboy at a restaurant or at some fast food place yet going on PUA forums to find when they can go out to sarge. It is like I don't exactly get it. Even when I have gamed while unemployed, it was after having at least a good bit of runway as well as making supplemental income (don't you dare make a joke here @BillyPilgrim lol).

It is like once in a blue moon I might meet a guy who works a White Collar job and does game. Most of the time, this is the story.

1. Dude lives with parents way out in the suburbs

2. Drives out to the city on weekends to do daygame and nightgame sessions

3. Hopes he can sneak girls into his car

Its like are so many PUA coaches having this whole gimmick where they tell guys "I can help you get models while you are broke". It is what eventually turned me off to John Anthony Lifestyle.

Back in 2012-2015 I use to go out with an PUA guy that I met randomly by chance. He was heavy into a RSD. 5'4,140 pounds hands down one of the best PUA's I have seen infield. However every time we would go out he would literally wear the same shirt(a white button up), and he would take the bus to hit the club if I didn't pick him up. The guy was always broke but always had time to go out, in his defense he was going to college and last I heard from him he got a job as an assistant producer for one of the big local TV stations. He should be making money now. Him wearing the same shirt didn't stop him from getting laid, but honestly I was embarrassed for him because if you only have one shirt that you wear every time you go out, that tells me you're not prioritizing your resources well,

Most guys who get into the PUA community have issues that really don't have to do with women, they think it's about women but the issue may be their confidence, their self-esteem, lack of finances(like most guys) etc. I personally don't have time at my age to go "Sarge" or hit the "Field it's honestly a waste of my time since I have so much work to do and catch up on. As you get older you realize life is short and your energy ain't the same (well for me it ain't) . In 2024 The pua/Gaming community is not what it was 10 years ago.

 

[CornbreadFed]

A). You do not need to necessarily have your shvt together to get laid here in the US. IMHO, I think you would have an advantage over some doctor or engineer that’s single.

B). PUA coaches need bodies to coach and promote their businesses and guys want assistance in getting laid, so two needs are mutually being served.

C). They do not care because they do not have to care. If there’s no external pressure to pushing these guys to get their shvt together being their parents, female standards, and other societal pressures then it does not matter. Last, the victim complex is a nasty disease, so these guys can easily blame feminism, Affirmative Action, College is a trap, and etc to make it seem like they did not have a chance.

 

[Jesse Pinkman]

I don't get it tbh. Like how can someone seriously not have their lives together and still pull? I mean there has to be a catch. Perhaps quality is super low? I can understand if it is a club promoter for a big nightclub or a bartender but even those guys can make a killing with money overtime and once they get good. Outside of that, I just don't see it.

 

[Manure Spherian]

Have you ever made a thread in which you did not chastise or express contempt for large swaths of mankind?

 

[Manure Spherian]

I don't get it tbh. Like how can someone seriously not have their lives together and still pull? I mean there has to be a catch. Perhaps quality is super low? I can understand if it is a club promoter for a big nightclub or a bartender but even those guys can make a killing with money overtime and once they get good. Outside of that, I just don't see it.

There are men behind bars who have women lined up for conjugal visits. Some of the scum of the earth get more women than an “improved”… assertive… high-income-earning… sh-t-together… gym-going everyman.

Has anyone met or known of a womanless drug dealer or mafiosi? I haven’t.

Do men still believe all women have great taste?

Quote: “He’s a player, and has always been a player,” his childhood friend, Cas Arends, told the Post. “Women have always been attracted to him for some reason.”

Exclusive | Natalee Holloway killer Joran van der Sloot having sex with three different women while serving life in prison

“He was approved for conjugal visits,” a spokesperson for Peru’s National Penitentiary Institute tells The Post. “He has the same rights as any other prisoner.”

nypost.com

 

[Manure Spherian]

inept

How?

no longer zealous about their work

Does this matter so long as they’re competent?

criminals

Although I don’t condone criminality, engaging in it increases attractiveness.

 

[nicksaiz65]

There are men behind bars who have women lined up for conjugal visits. Some of the scum of the earth get more women than an “improved”… assertive… high-income-earning… sh-t-together… gym-going everyman.

Has anyone met or known of a womanless drug dealer or mafiosi? I haven’t.

Do men still believe all women have great taste?

Quote: “He’s a player, and has always been a player,” his childhood friend, Cas Arends, told the Post. “Women have always been attracted to him for some reason.”

Exclusive | Natalee Holloway killer Joran van der Sloot having sex with three different women while serving life in prison

“He was approved for conjugal visits,” a spokesperson for Peru’s National Penitentiary Institute tells The Post. “He has the same rights as any other prisoner.”

nypost.com

I'm guessing that drug dealers without cars but who are still drowning in women fall into this category as well

 

[Manure Spherian]

I watched this some time ago. If I recall correctly, this guy was a couch-surfing, substance-addicted, penniless, unemployed bum who got more women than a typical new- and-improved, careermaxxed, gymmaxxed, groommaxxed fella.

 

[Manure Spherian]

I'm guessing that drug dealers without cars but who are still drowning in women fall into this category as well

Funny you mentioned this. Yes, I know one who a former drug dealer who didn’t have a car at the time he was in business. And he has never been without a woman since 15 years old other than a few years he was away and since turning his life around. How do I know? I’m related to him.

 

[Slowhandluke]

Funny you mentioned this. Yes, I know who a former drug dealer who didn’t have a car at the time he was in business. And he has never been without a woman since 15 years old other than a few years he was away and since turning his life around. How do I know? I’m related to him.

were these women longterm material? or kinda "trashy"? if people want trashy women, it's not too hard...

 

[Jesse Pinkman]

Have you ever made a thread in which you did not chastise or express contempt for large swaths of mankind?

Nah, actually I am looking to ramp it up.

 

[CornbreadFed]

I don't get it tbh. Like how can someone seriously not have their lives together and still pull? I mean there has to be a catch. Perhaps quality is super low? I can understand if it is a club promoter for a big nightclub or a bartender but even those guys can make a killing with money overtime and once they get good. Outside of that, I just don't see it.

Mix of law of relativity and genetics. You have to understand that we base our benchmark off of our friends, family, and people closest to us. If all of the people around are crap, then you are more than likely going to be crap or vulnerable at least. In addition, it does take a competitive/type A mindset to want to constantly be rising instead of hitting a peak ceiling like most people. These guys are probably around a lot of losers or are not competitive due to being spoon fed or extremely Type B and dulled out by a bad mindset, drugs, etc.

 

[Manure Spherian]

were these women longterm material? or kinda "trashy"? if people want trashy women, it's not too hard...

A blend. Some middle- and upper-class girls next door like to roll around in the dirt. I don’t think they are common, but more than some expect.

 

[CornbreadFed]

A guy with a great career, in great shape and good game, beats all the criminals (IMO)

The things is that in today's society, since fathers don't know wtf they're doing, you have:

1. Criminals with good game but bad living conditions
2. White collar guys with no game and great living conditions (I was in this category)
3. A small mix between men with average game & good living conditions, and great game and average living conditions.

Rollo wrote it in his book, Muscles, Money &, Game should be a combination, not one at the expense of the other.

I am not talking about criminals; I am talking about low ambition men with unskilled labor jobs or guys in social status/clout jobs.

1. They have a much larger dating pool than successful men because they have nothing to lose. Any girl in the social ladder is available to him, while an Engineer has to date women within a few Standard Deviations of him. Yes, he could date the Mcdonalds fry cook, but that would be a disaster, or he could date some Boss Babe CEO, but she would never see him as an equal or superior.

2. They don't have personal responsibilities or some job expectations to hold them back. You ever notice how Boss Babes date guys like Travis Barker or Jesse Pinkman haha? These are the bad boy toys for grown women.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Nah, actually I am looking to ramp it up.

Well get to work then Jesse.

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

They're just trying to distract themselves from emotional pain and trauma by chasing tail. It's retarded.

What you're describing is true of EVERY vocation on the planet: Lawyers, Doctors, Engineers, Ministers, Teachers, Military Officers, etc etc

80% of those in every profession are either inept, no longer zealous about their work, or criminals. Dating Coaches/men's gurus are no different

Also this

 

[Slowhandluke]

I am not talking about criminals; I am talking about low ambition men with unskilled labor jobs or guys in social status/clout jobs.

1. They have a much larger dating pool than successful men because they have nothing to lose. Any girl in the social ladder is available to him, while an Engineer has to date women within a few Standard Deviations of him. Yes, he could date the Mcdonalds fry cook, but that would be a disaster, or he could date some Boss Babe CEO, but she would never see him as an equal or superior.

2. They don't have personal responsibilities or some job expectations to hold them back. You ever notice how Boss Babes date guys like Travis Barker or Jesse Pinkman haha? These are the bad boy toys for grown women.

most average men are "low ambition" and make only 60k a year on average (or less?). research suggests average men are dating no one. average women are not looking to date average men regardless what your intuition says. however attractive men (body, face, etc) who are have average jobs do have an advantage in the dating market.

if you are comparing an attractive guy with a blue collar job verses an average looking successful guy... you might have a point.

I guess it's about the whole package. an attractive guy with a successful career will be more attractive to a girl then an attractive guy with a blue collar job.

 

[BPH]

1. Dude lives with parents way out in the suburbs

I feel personally attacked

I don't get it tbh. Like how can someone seriously not have their lives together and still pull? I mean there has to be a catch. Perhaps quality is super low? I can understand if it is a club promoter for a big nightclub or a bartender but even those guys can make a killing with money overtime and once they get good. Outside of that, I just don't see it.

I'm not advocating for my situation, but maybe I can explain...

When I go out and I meet women I am NOT the guy that lives at home with his parents, the guy that doesn't make a lot of money, or the guy who lives in suburban Delaware where fun goes to die.

What I AM is the good-looking guy who has the confidence to make the first move, can handle my liquor and doesn't need to be sloshed to talk to them, and offers them a fun night in bed with no obligation beyond that.

I am not lying to these women about my situation, and I have not lied to make myself out to be better than I actually am (notably how everybody was telling me to lie and say I was younger while out at college bars). But I'm also not volunteering that information about my situation unless explicitly asked...I'm not going up to these girls and asking if they want to come back with me to my mom's house...