Who here wants to get married and why?

Tenacity

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Good.

Let's add to No. 2 and take the position, for the moment, that you also wanted kids to carry your torch for generations to come.

I'm sure most of us agree that we would prefer No. 2, especially in the context of raising children, if possible.

It is also an observable fact that the women who are best molded for the role listed in No. 2 are women from certain cultures where marriage is a mandatory, indoctrinated "need," and the lifelong purpose of these subset of women is only to marry, procreate, and raise a family. These women will also not entertain civil, non-marital, unions, but are the best women to procreate and raise families with.
What makes you think these women will stay married to you while the children grow up? People get married and divorced, I mean I just think your argument is based on a perfect situation where NOTHING goes wrong and if anybody plans their life like that, they will certainly be disappointed.

Now ...

Let's assume the following:
  • The woman will not entertain a non-marital relation;
  • The woman is best molded for the role in No. 2;
What is the value of this woman?

$0
$100
$1,000
$10,000
$100,000

Certainly, she has value, right?
No prenup, no marriage. Simple.
So this woman you are describing.......is going to sign a prenup without any fuss, argument, etc.? I doubt the woman you are describing is going to sign this prenup you have lined out Guru.

Secondly, what's her value? Depends on what she BRINGS TO MY LIFE. A chick laying on her back, taking my dyck raw, and shytting out kids is not special. Any chick can do that. If her value to my life is worth $100,000 than she better have INCREASED my overall net worth by at least $1 million.
 

Tenacity

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Notwithstanding, I think this thread is going to go down as the THREAD OF THE YEAR on this board. This thread needs to remain open going forward and eventually get to 100 pages.

Guru I'm waiting for you to marry one of these chicks and report back to us what's going on. Report it right here on this thread so that in the year 2025, we can come back to the year of 2017 (if we are all still alive) and see if your snowflake is still with you and you are "happy".
 

guru1000

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So this woman you are describing.......is going to sign a prenup without any fuss, argument, etc.? I doubt the woman you are describing is going to sign this prenup you have lined out Guru.
You'd be surprised. And I say this from experience.

Contract for contract. No prenup, no marriage. "Then we'll just keep things the way they are going right now. Things are going great!"

Her willingness is also a good indicator of her motive: indoctrination or money.
 

Tenacity

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You'd be surprised. And I say this from experience.

Contract for contract. No prenup, no marriage. "Then we'll just keep things the way they are going right now. Things are going great!"
Lol, this is how it usually goes when you tell one of these "I wanna get married" chicks to sign a prenup:

Tenacity Says: So Tyquesha, you know I'm feelin you boo, if I wanted to marry you, would you sign my prenup or nah?

Tyquesha Says: "Ummm, sign a prenup? Tenacity boy you crazy! I don't believe in divorce! Hmmmm, in my opinion, if you trying to get a prenup signed, that must mean you don't trust me or you don't think the marriage is going to work out. My momma and daddy are still married with no prenup, my grandparents were married with no prenup....my family nor I believe in divorce so boy you betta go sit down somewhere with that mess."
 

guru1000

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Lol, this is how it usually goes when you tell one of these "I wanna get married" chicks to sign a prenup:

Tenacity Says: So Tyquesha, you know I'm feelin you boo, if I wanted to marry you, would you sign my prenup or nah?

Tyquesha Says: "Ummm, sign a prenup? Tenacity boy you crazy! I don't believe in divorce! Hmmmm, in my opinion, if you trying to get a prenup signed, that must mean you don't trust me or you don't think the marriage is going to work out. My momma and daddy are still married with no prenup, my grandparents were married with no prenup....my family nor I believe in divorce so boy you betta go sit down somewhere with that mess."
Why even bring up marriage, not smart. She may entertain a family arrangement without marriage. Never leave hints that you are interested in marriage and plant unneeded seeds in her mind. Marriage is her push (as it's her benefit), and most pushes on her part aren't even real. Big mistake and good lesson for the audience.

But in this case, assuming she brought it up and was serious, no further discussion needed. Just a simple "Ok," and just ride the relation till she leaves.
 

Tenacity

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But in this case, assuming she brought it up and was serious, no further discussion needed. Just a simple "Ok," and just ride the relation till she leaves.
Which is what I always do lol, it's what I have been saying should be done from the get go!
 

The Duke

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Makes perfect sense. How the hell do you stay detached enough to just let them go so easily?
My exwife taught me that skill. Going thru our divorce was the hardest thing I've ever endured. Once you regain composure you realize you are much stronger and nothing phases you. All of these women, no matter how good they seem are a little shady at the core, its in their nature. Just enjoy your time with them and realize all good things eventually come to an end. The mistake I made in my marriage that caused me immense pain was believing that it would last forever. Don't go into relationships thinking they will last forever. Take the blinders off!
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Also, the girl that lived with me for 5yrs was willing to sign a prenup. There was no pleading/bargaining either.

Guys, don't be afraid. A good woman knows when to submit and will, if she thinks you are all that. If she puts up a fight, then she isn't worth keeping.

We've lowered the requirements so drastically as a collective group, that its time to start making some demands. There was a time when women were required to know how to cook, clean, and take care of babies. Now they hire that done. They were also frowned up on if they had multiple sex partners, kids from different men, divorced, etc. These were not considered acceptable candidates for marriage.

We don't require schit these days. I don't think a prenup is asking too much. IN fact, it sounds like a damn good schitt test to me.

If your assets weren't important, then she would marry the 2nd shift grocery store worker that is better looking than you.
 
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BeExcellent

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There's absolutely no way to "vet" anyone in this landscape like that. And what's even more funny, is @BeExcellent is promoting this "vet properly" campaign and she was unable to "vet" her ex-husband properly, which is why the loser (sorry, he's a loser) gets to sit on his a.ss FOR LIFE and collect free residual checks from her.
Firstly I'm choosing the give him that benefit voluntarily, which is being overlooked since that doesn't serve your argument. I've explained why that is, why I think it's a good thing, and if you really want to know more about it, there is a principle in 48 Laws of Power that the arrangement follows...but you'll have to do your homework to see which one.

Second I stated that I did NOT vet him properly, that I own that decision, and now I know better through the experience just how important vetting is.

Third as stated by myself and Guru and others in this thread YOU CANNOT REMOVE RISK. Ever. You can manage it but you can't remove it.

Just because I left my marriage does not mean marriage as an institution is broken. There are too many happily married people that I know personally, that many of you know personally, and even some SS members who are enjoying great marriage experiences. I'm not bitter about being divorced at all, in fact I am finding that I have as many opportunities as I ever did but of course I am still a size 4 with a great body, long thick hair and my looks still turn heads, intimidate, and attract high value men. I'm an outlier physically, but my family has great genetics and we age well so call me lucky.

Nobody in this thread ANYWHERE has been able to set aside the FACT that there exist millions of happily married couples (like Howie's parents) and there is nothing wrong with men who aspire to marriage because it IS hands down the best environment for the raising of children, and it has emotional benefits and legal benefits (next of kin, legal family, inheritance, etc.) that nobody here is mentioning.

Just because some of the men here don't believe in it doesn't mean millions of other people aren't enjoying it and reaping benefit from it. If you personally don't believe in it, don't do it, it's very simple. There is no need for this crusade to save other men from marriage. Other men are grown adults and will make their own decisions. The fact that a man is here at all suggests he has his eyes wide open and is observing the dating landscape. The whole point of the discussion as it stands now is seek marriage if that suits your own life goals, do as much as you can to manage and mitigate the risks, and go forward.

Some of y'all just sound mad that you haven't figured out how to find the type of woman worth marriage. That has everything to do with who YOU are. Period.
 

BeExcellent

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It has EVERYTHING to do with that? Do you think the current market is favorable for that?
The market DOES NOT MATTER for the top tier men. It never has and it never will. The top tier men have always had and will always have choices concerning the best women. This has been stated on this forum ad nauseum on thread after thread after thread. Be a top tier man (and that includes adjusting your mentality, attitude, and outlook) and you will find your prospects improve dramatically. This is not news.
 

BeExcellent

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Now as an additional thought not every man is a millionaire with debonair good looks, who is physically endowed (or whatever qualities you think are a woman's fantasy). But there are plenty of guys here aspiring to be their best selves. What you have to do is have a good attitude and be real with where you fall in the SMV and calibrate that to what you want and have a good attitude and keep your eyes open. Keep an open mind and be open to people.

If you have pre-emptively decided (closed your mind to believe) the market is shjt like @Tenacity, @Urbanyst and @LARaiders85 seem to have decided...then guess what? This is the reality YOU are creating through your own attitudes and beliefs. Period. Sub consciously you are actually so convinced the market is crap that you sort for crap women...and this is convenient because it reinforces your belief system and absolves you of responsibility for your interactions in the market. There are men on SS right now today who DO NOT suffer from thinking the WHOLE market is crap, and guess what? Those guys are having success.

Flame me if you want but some of ya'll are having cognitive dissonance because you cannot resolve the FACT that others are having success in this area and you can't figure out why you are not also having success. Attitude/beliefs, attitude/beliefs, attitude/beliefs.
 

Serenity

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Having to be a licensed DETECTIVE, psychologist and sociologist should NOT be necessary just to find a woman worth "marrying".

Hens why marriage is dumb a sh*t lol.
You don't need to be that. Recognizing a potential problem is a skill men should develop anyways. The professions you mention are trained at solving the problems, you merely have to recognize it and walk away before it's too late. Most of them aren't high functioning sociopaths capable of hiding it well.

Let's for the sake of argument use your reasoning in a different setting. If you have a date with some random plate, how can you know she won't murder you? According to your reasoning you can't, so basically you risk your life every time you're with some chick. Better just stay away from women then, right? That's the conclusion from your line of reasoning.

We're not here to pvssy out of what we want, we're here to learn how to achieve it as responsibly as possible.
 
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BeExcellent

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I know men in decent marriages who are far from "top tier."
This is what I am trying to illustrate. You can see men who are in "decent" marriages who are not that different from you.

Why are they having success and you are not? That is really the more accurate question for some guys here to be asking. You can see that you are similar/same as someone having success in relationships and you covet that success in relationship to some degree. If such a guy goes through a divorce you can then point to it and jump up and down and say "SEE! SEE! His marriage was crap!" In other words you look at the other guy getting a divorce as proving out your belief system. What about all the other dudes like you or your friend who ARE NOT getting divorced? Well we discount them and assume they couldn't possibly be having a positive experience...that would be incongruent with what you believe.

I'm not trying to be an ass hat here but why not explore the actual problem (why is friend A having success but LARaider isn't) that bugs you rather than assign a crap rating to the market as a whole and call it not your fault?

Herein lies actual empowerment because you can control what you think and how you act. Exercise your own autonomy!

you will not meet AND attract said very high quality girl, especially if you are over 26yo or so and mostly in the secondary market.
I'm 48, almost 49. Pushing 50 and I constantly attract and meet GREAT guys. Every time I go anywhere. Some of whom are good looking, private jet successful and desire marriage as an institution so they can get that part of their life sorted, have a life partner and get back to dragon slaying. Just last weekend I met two great guys, both younger than I, both 1% men, and both interested in me, while at a couple of social engagements

I could have the attitude, particularly at my age, that I'm old and washed up. I don't at all. This translates into confidence and positivity which attracts people (and men) like mad. I'm still very physically attractive (lifetime of effort + genetics), that will not last forever naturally but my great attitude, smile, and outlook will last forever. And it is that attitude, outlook and so forth that is so attractive.

There are also plenty of attractive women my age and younger ages too who do not have success. They whine and complain and have bitterness in their attitude. Bitterness repels good people. Men or women. It is like stink on shjt.

There are some bitter men here. Bitterness repels. Get better, not bitter.
 

Tenacity

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Some of y'all just sound mad that you haven't figured out how to find the type of woman worth marriage. That has everything to do with who YOU are. Period.
This is the reality YOU are creating through your own attitudes and beliefs. Period. Sub consciously you are actually so convinced the market is crap that you sort for crap women...and this is convenient because it reinforces your belief system and absolves you of responsibility for your interactions in the market. There are men on SS right now today who DO NOT suffer from thinking the WHOLE market is crap, and guess what? Those guys are having success.
And here comes the magical Law of Attraction stuff lol, you know the stuff that says we operate in a vacuum where only OUR THOUGHTS determine how our life ends up. So basically, if I go outside today and get hit by a drunk driver, that was technically my fault as I must have been thinking "too negative" all day and the NEGATIVE energies attracted the drunk driver to me o_O

Hey so @Howiestern your divorce was apparently a result of you thinking too negative, and if you would have just thought more positive, than the energies in the universe would have "vibed right" and your wife would have remained stellar, your marriage would have remained perfect, and you would still be riding off into the sunset happily ever after. :rofl:

The market DOES NOT MATTER for the top tier men..
Then can you explain why many top tier millionaires, billionaires, and other celebrities have had failed marriages? Even our President Trump has had two failed marriages. Can you get any more "top tier" than Donald Trump? No you can't lol. And even HE has struggled with women in this market.
 

BeExcellent

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This is magical thinking nonsense.

The market is what it is. There are some good women and some good marriages( I am in the @BeTheChange camp on the necessity of marriage in the social ladder). Ditto for this of us that like monogamy and love. Marriage with a prenup is OK if you find a very high quality girl.

However, why turn a blind eye to the very real possibility that you will not meet AND attract said very high quality girl, especially if you are over 26yo or so and mostly in the secondary market. This is a market you are clueless about, because you are too old to witness it from the inside.

Improving yourself means you will have a better chance and attracting this girl but it is far from a sure thing. It also means you will have a better chance of attracting the far more plentiful low quality women putting on a good girl act for you, and waste lots of time and money on them in hunt for the unicorn.
I understand the two sides of the argument as you have succintly presented. Quit trying to disqualify me based on age. People at my age are not that different. So the question that remains is this:

What you do about it? Whine and cry foul and pout and sit out altogether? Or do you realize your own place in the market and set aside the sweeping generalizations and move forward seeking whatever it is that YOU desire the market to grant you?
 

Tenacity

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There are some bitter men here. Bitterness repels. Get better, not bitter.
Lol, who exactly in this discussion is bitter? Everybody seems to be having a very logical, rational, critical, conversation surrounding the benefits and drawbacks of a Marriage contract. I don't see anybody on here saying they HATE all women and ALL women need to die. At least not in this thread lol.
 

Tenacity

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Why would you assume we are whining (I know Tenacity is but he is the exception not the rule).
Lol sir there's absolutely nothing for "Tenacity" to whine about.....because I have not signed a marriage contract, I will not sign a marriage contract, and thus, I will not be ripped off due to a marriage contract. This discussion is for pure entertainment only as I have never and WILL NEVER feel the pain of a divorce.

@Augustus_McCrae and @Howiestern on the other hand have actually felt said pain....as a result, if they wanted to be bitter, to whine, to bytch, to complain, or do whatever....I honestly feel it is justified.

This is another message for guys on this forum. @BeExcellent and others will TALK YOU INTO marrying someone, then when you get divorced and dragged through the cleaners......she will say, "Hey, be a real man and stop whining about it! A real man would just hand over HALF of his assets and be done with it!" :rofl:
 

set

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Are BeDivorced A.K.A @BeExcellent and ex-con Pastor Ponzi the SS Marriage expert A.K.A @guru1000 trying to use SS for their beta buck marriage website scam?


Perhaps SS will sponsor ad’s for their Vegas style wedding chapel and mail order brides?

Have posters pay bitcoin beta bucks to have SS Molly Maid mods serve as groomsmen?


Two divorced con artists trying to run a marriage scam on SS.


How the manuresphere has fallen.
 

BeExcellent

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Even our President Trump has had two failed marriages. Can you get any more "top tier" than Donald Trump? No you can't lol. And even HE has struggled with women in this market.
He's married and doing just fine in that department as far as I can tell. He's also had bankruptcies. Does that make him a bad businessman? Nope.

Until you change your attitudes and give it an earnest try from a better perspective your bitterness imprisons you Tenacity. You are attractive, successful, smart, and desirable...until your attitude comes out. That is your issue in a nutshell. Until you fix that issue you are not going to have a different experience. People with a great attitude will not tolerate people with bitter attitudes. Why is this so hard to wrap your brain around?

I mean look. There are men here who insult me, shame me, belittle me, and so forth all the time. So what. I think its amusing. I am impervious to it. I KNOW who I am, I KNOW what I have going on and I could care less about some potshots from the peanut gallery.

Get your attitude to the point where you are impervious to all this stuff that you rant on about. If you do that you'll see a whole other segment of the market that the filters you place over your own eyes preclude you from seeing. You are like the cartoon character from Green Eggs and Ham. Until you experience something you have no idea whether or not it is something worthwhile. Have some faith, meditate, adjust your attitude and do something different. Obviously what you are doing now is NOT suiting your deep desire. Or maybe it is...in which case never get married and drive on, problem solved.
 

exhausted

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This is magical thinking nonsense.

The market is what it is. There are some good women and some good marriages( I am in the @BeTheChange camp on the necessity of marriage in the social ladder). Ditto for this of us that like monogamy and love. Marriage with a prenup is OK if you find a very high quality girl.

However, why turn a blind eye to the very real possibility that you will not meet AND attract said very high quality girl, especially if you are over 26yo or so and mostly in the secondary market. This is a market you are clueless about, because you are too old to witness it from the inside.

Improving yourself means you will have a better chance and attracting this girl but it is far from a sure thing. It also means you will have a better chance of attracting the far more plentiful low quality women putting on a good girl act for you, and waste lots of time and money on them in hunt for the unicorn.
THIS

Today the peecentage of a good woman is like 4%

The rest do as you say, put on an act to hide how blatantly lazy, and chitty they are as human beings.

I have said a million times here, today's woman is worthless in many ways, except the 4% that are already taken.

What do we do?
Just bite the bullet and accept to be married is to be half miserable?.

Chit i want a family and more kids.. we get one life and it goes fast..

Wtf are we suppose to do?.
 

guru1000

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I could have the attitude, particularly at my age, that I'm old and washed up. I don't at all. This translates into confidence and positivity which attracts people (and men) like mad. I'm still very physically attractive (lifetime of effort + genetics), that will not last forever naturally but my great attitude, smile, and outlook will last forever. And it is that attitude, outlook and so forth that is so attractive.

There are also plenty of attractive women my age and younger ages too who do not have success. They whine and complain and have bitterness in their attitude. Bitterness repels good people. Men or women. It is like stink on shjt.

There are some bitter men here. Bitterness repels. Get better, not bitter.
Off topic, but this is an important distinction that we all can benefit from outside of marriage, and in regard to dating.

We talk much about SMV, improving via working out, becoming more attractive, and making more money. We never really discuss improving our personality, more specifically our attitudes. I've recently come to the conclusion, that attitude and personality is of equal, and in some cases, greater relevance that SMV.

We should open some threads and discussions about this specifically in the context of dating.
 
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