Who here lives on their own?

vagrant

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I want to start living on my own. For those who have done it. How did you guys start? What did you learn? What advice would you give me?
 

LovelyLady

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Everything will cost 25% more than you think it will.

Don't get a roommate - get a place you can afford alone.

Pay attention to how much natural light the place has - it will make you happier to have sunlight.

Don't get a pet for the first year.

Don't become the place everyone parties and crashes at. It's your home, not their dumping ground.

No matter how humble, keep it clean.
 

insidious

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LovelyLady said:
Everything will cost 25% more than you think it will.

Don't get a roommate - get a place you can afford alone.

Pay attention to how much natural light the place has - it will make you happier to have sunlight.

Don't get a pet for the first year.

Don't become the place everyone parties and crashes at. It's your home, not their dumping ground.

No matter how humble, keep it clean.
Bingo, almost!

I hate direct sunlight in my living quarters. Granted, I'm one of those people who actually becomes more energetic during the winter.

I would add: learn to use the kitchen and don't make frozen & take out food your sole nourishment. Buy a cookbook and start small. Your first step towards true independence is learning to feed yourself cheaply and healthfully.
 

Master Bates

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Firstly, location location location. Being within walking distance of stuff to do and places to eat/drink is much better than having to get in your car and drive ten minutes just to get to a cafe or whatever, and it's worth the extra money (plus think of the money you'll save on gas).

Secondly, if you're like 99.9% of people and hate listening to other people's noise, do what you can to find a place where you'll be subjected to other people's talking, screaming, laughing, pounding, partying and music as little as possible. Older places tend to have more soundproof walls and doors. And getting a top-floor apartment is really worth it

Both of those may be things you don't put all too much consideration into while looking for an apartment (if that's what you're looking for), but believe me, weeks/months/years into settling in, you'll understand.

Also, extras like a pool and exercise room can be a nice draw, but don't place things like that above more important factors such as mentioned above.

that's all I can think of right now. there's some other good advice in this thread.
 

vagrant

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Master Bates said:
Firstly, location location location. Being within walking distance of stuff to do and places to eat/drink is much better than having to get in your car and drive ten minutes just to get to a cafe or whatever, and it's worth the extra money (plus think of the money you'll save on gas).

Secondly, if you're like 99.9% of people and hate listening to other people's noise, do what you can to find a place where you'll be subjected to other people's talking, screaming, laughing, pounding, partying and music as little as possible. Older places tend to have more soundproof walls and doors. And getting a top-floor apartment is really worth it

Both of those may be things you don't put all too much consideration into while looking for an apartment (if that's what you're looking for), but believe me, weeks/months/years into settling in, you'll understand.

Also, extras like a pool and exercise room can be a nice draw, but don't place things like that above more important factors such as mentioned above.

that's all I can think of right now. there's some other good advice in this thread.
In terms of location I'm fine as long as it's not somewhere ghetto. I can deal with noises and such but not the kind that'll scare you like dudes hitting each other with a baseball bat.
 

vagrant

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LovelyLady said:
Everything will cost 25% more than you think it will.

Don't get a roommate - get a place you can afford alone.

Pay attention to how much natural light the place has - it will make you happier to have sunlight.

Don't get a pet for the first year.

Don't become the place everyone parties and crashes at. It's your home, not their dumping ground.

No matter how humble, keep it clean.
I'll never get a roommate. I can just imagine a roommate who would bring ten people in the house everyday who I don't even like. yup I want a place for myself.
 

azanon

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vagrant said:
I want to start living on my own. For those who have done it. How did you guys start? What did you learn? What advice would you give me?
If you're 19 or older, change the "want to" to should. At 19 or higher, it really is only an issue of when you think it's the right time to be an adult. Granted, I don't really count the college kid that's only home for the summer, but if you're not in college, you need to be working and one of the things your job should pay for is your housing. If you just stay with your parents, you're actually hurting yourself more than you are hurting them (by them paying your housing), because by using them as a crutch, you aren't motivated to help yourself.

You start by plotting a career path and a long-term plan. Don't just get a job to pass the time. Actually strategize as to how you are going to constantly increase your pay or launch a successful career. Ask yourself, "how am I going to "get mine" in this world". There's a lot of money with your name on it in this world. All that's lacking is you doing what it takes to get what's yours.
 

vagrant

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questions!

why did you decide to live on your own? and how much money exactly do I need to get by every month?
 

azanon

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My household income is well into 6 figures now, but 12 years ago, I had a job paying 21K a year. If i had to, I could have probably "gotten by" with 5K/year less than that. Our tax laws and power of choice allows you to get by on not a whole lot.

You do it by cheap housing (very modest apartment is my recommendation), and by driving a beater that's paid for. Beans and rice for food, and watch the utilities. But you know what; being on your own gives you a sense of pride that more than makes up for mom and dad (or whomever) taking care of you. Trust me, i did the live with my parents one year around 23 years old. Looking back, that was my worst year of all, and my parents are well off.

If you work on your career and pay, things will only improve and the improvements (better apt, or house someday, better cars, better food, etc) will keep you happy.

Rem, in your 20s you might not have a lot of money, but you have the best health of your life and you can date hot women. It isn't all bad!
 

Bible_Belt

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I shacked up with a rich girl and let Mummy pay our bills.

Wh0ring yourself out is always the easiest way, although not necessarily the best.
 

vagrant

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azanon said:
If you're 19 or older, change the "want to" to should. At 19 or higher, it really is only an issue of when you think it's the right time to be an adult. Granted, I don't really count the college kid that's only home for the summer, but if you're not in college, you need to be working and one of the things your job should pay for is your housing. If you just stay with your parents, you're actually hurting yourself more than you are hurting them (by them paying your housing), because by using them as a crutch, you aren't motivated to help yourself.

You start by plotting a career path and a long-term plan. Don't just get a job to pass the time. Actually strategize as to how you are going to constantly increase your pay or launch a successful career. Ask yourself, "how am I going to "get mine" in this world". There's a lot of money with your name on it in this world. All that's lacking is you doing what it takes to get what's yours.
You know you are exactly right. All my life everything was hand given to me and now I'm struggling. I didn't know that one day I was going to have to work my as$ off to support myself. I regret not taking school seriously when I had the chance, because at the time I felt there wasn't any need for it at all and now I'm paying the price.

Now I'm here trying to figure things out on how I can make it like you talk about. You know how everyone's been asked, would you do such and such for a million bucks? Would you eat this or jump off of that for a million bucks?

Now I'm realizing that there are many ways to make it out but you need to put everything on the line. Looking at my current situation I'm willing to put everything on the line everyday to pursue my dreams!~
 

meitenesrigas

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Get a maid. Without one your place will be disgusting. This rule does not apply for most gay males. They seem to keep clean and tidy places.

Where I am at a cookbook would make you look really emasculated. The girls here want to take care of you. Thank God for places that never had the feminist movement or a sexual revolution. Every girlfriend I have had has taken pride in cooking and serving me. They all would clean my place, but my place comes with a once a week maid which is good enough for me. Nothing like having your girlfriend skip a class so that she can take care of you.

I admit it, I am helpless. Without my mother or a girlfriend I would be lost in life.

I guess in America you cook, clean, and buy your girlfriends things. All this and they still insist on wearing flip-flops and not taking care of their bodies. Something isn't right about that picture.
 

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

Master Bates

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meitenesrigas said:
Get a maid. Without one your place will be disgusting. This rule does not apply for most gay males....

Where I am at a cookbook would make you look really emasculated.
anyway, back to reality....
 

meitenesrigas

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Master Bates said:
anyway, back to reality....
Why is it that so many of you cannot imagine life anywhere outside of Iowa or Florida?

Please quit the baiting tactics.
 

The Inside Man

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meitenesrigas said:
I admit it, I am helpless. Without my mother or a girlfriend I would be lost in life.

I guess in America you cook, clean, and buy your girlfriends things. All this and they still insist on wearing flip-flops and not taking care of their bodies. Something isn't right about that picture.
You have been talking about the American way of life alot in some of your posts, without much experience to back it up it seems. In the U.S we have super hot American girls, and also super hot girls from other countries who have moved here. You said you are helpless without your mother or girlfriend. Alot of American males cook and clean so they do not feel this way. I do not buy my girlfriend things, except for a $20 starbucks card this Christmas. It really isn't the way the media portrays us on TV for everyone here.

Just because you think "something isn't right about that picture" of this country, to you, doesn't mean it is wrong because it is different than your culture... the same way I don't feel the American way of life is better than other cultures.
 

Skel

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LovelyLady said:
Everything will cost 25% more than you think it will.
Especially true :rockon:

Dont forget you will need extra money for when your car breaks down, when you get that 600 dollar car tax bill you werent expecting, that heating bill that went way up for no reason or that time that you got sick and were out of work for 2 weeks.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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fuzzx said:
replace the WANT with 'am in a dysfunctional family'.

You SHOULD NOT WANT to live on your own. It sucks period. Its lonely and no amount of partying, sex and women make up for that. I've been living on my own for quite some time now in places where no english is spoken or written. Let me tell you, I would LOVE to move home. If I lived in the same country, you bet your ass I would be at home 24/7.

Do not move out unless its absolutely necessary! Most cultures look at the North American standard of living on your own as complete dysfunction... There is no need unless its necessary for you to do so because of work. Save your money and get educated in something or start a business. Paying ur own bills and making ur own food sux ass.
A lot can be said about living off the independence of others. Why learn how to take care of yourself if someone else will do it for 'ya?
 

If you want to talk, talk to your friends. If you want a girl to like you, listen to her, ask questions, and act like you are on the edge of your seat.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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