When text frequency dies down

[Jaylan]

OP is her plate. Remember. Nothing more.

Not really. She doesnt see other men, and agreed to this. Yup, Im able to get girls on lock like that without the girlfriend tag. She knows my boundary. If she wants to see other people, shes gotta let me know upfront, and then she can bail.

Of course she says she hated poor response patterns, but also guess what? She loved her ex for it, he was a challenge.

Smh...um nah she didnt. And she dumped him too.

I would say reply to her texts in an hour or so. Ignoring for a day might be taking it too far. And when you reply, try to be playful and dirty. But try not to initiate yourself, unless it's to set up a date for sex.

Already doing this bro. I was doing this since I met her. Jeezus...youre not talking to a noob here. We are always playful and dirty

I reply to her texts when I feel like it. Sometimes its right away...sometimes its a few hours late because I took a nap, didnt see my phone went off, or forget she messaged me. The point of this thread was because I was noticing the delays increasing in length and frequency.

Also if she tries to meet up for sex, say you are busy or have other plans on that day. Do that once in a while. Otherwise, she will know she can have sex with you anytime she wants, which is bad for being a challenge.

Why would I shoot myself in the foot when it comes to making plans to hang out? We have busy schedules that dont match in terms of down-time. So why, in the event that I havent seen her in over a week, would I turn down efforts for us to spend time together?

Again, youre not talking to a noob here. Most guys meet a new girl and just to bang her as often as possible, multiple times a week. Im seeing a girl with a busy schedule, who I dont live insanely close to...and hence if I blow her off...we wont hang out for another week.

Yeah...thatll totally increase attraction lol. You know what I would do if a girl was able to see me less than once a week and it happened often? Id be looking for someone else to spend my time with and have sex with them.

 

[way2smart]

The point of this thread was because I was noticing the delays increasing in length and frequency.

If that was your only question. Yes delays increasing in length and decrease in frequency does certainly indicate waning interest.

Still you are too dependent on the outcome, she knows this. She knows you will not blow her off because of "busy" schedule. She is just your plate, blow her off one time. You will f**ck her in 2 weeks, so what?

 

[Jaylan]

If that was your only question. Yes delays increasing in length and decrease in frequency does certainly indicate waning interest.

Still you are too dependent on the outcome, she knows this. She knows you will not blow her off because of "busy" schedule. She is just your plate, blow her off one time. You will f**ck her in 2 weeks, so what?

This sounds like game playing. Why would I play games? For what reason. In one post you condemn texting for the sake of texting, yet now youre advocating I blow this girl off for the sake of blowing her off? Im already not very available to her recently because of my career studies.

We both know we like spending time together, and we both know we wont blow each other off. What we both have done is reschedule when we were legitimately busy. Again, I only see her once a week, and depending on the week, we do reschedule our hang out. I see no point in playing games and pretending to be busy, when we already lead legitimately busy lives and dont see each other as often as other people see those they date.

 

[Bingo-Player]

Sounds to me like she’s exploring other avenues

Every chick I’ve ever known to be 100% into me wants to make contact with me at LEAST once a day

Women need constant reassurance and attention if she needs it from YOU then she will do anything to get it

The fact she’s stopped initiating is enough to set a few alarm bells ringing

Proceed with caution

 

[mikey2012]

Sounds to me like she’s exploring other avenues

Every chick I’ve ever known to be 100% into me wants to make contact with me at LEAST once a day

Women need constant reassurance and attention if she needs it from YOU then she will do anything to get it

The fact she’s stopped initiating is enough to set a few alarm bells ringing

Proceed with caution

Agree. She must be getting more covck on the side if she is seeing you only once a week. Women who are into you need constant validation from you.

 

[way2smart]

This sounds like game playing. Why would I play games? For what reason. In one post you condemn texting for the sake of texting, yet now youre advocating I blow this girl off for the sake of blowing her off?

Oh boy, you take her way too seriously. I won't be replying to your thread anymore, I see no reason. You are just not listening.
And you were saying that you are not a noob? Okay makes perfect sense

 

[Jaylan]

Clearly you guys are ignoring what Im saying clearly in my posts. So I will try one last time to help you understand the situation

Oh boy, you take her way too seriously. I won't be replying to your thread anymore, I see no reason. You are just not listening.
And you were saying that you are not a noob? Okay makes perfect sense

I asked you a simple question and now you say Im taking the girl too seriously. I simply asked you why you advocate game playing and pretending to be busier than I already legitimately am.

You are not the one listening here buddy. You keep giving me advice to do things Ive already done as well. You tell me to talk dirty and be playful...Ive done that from the start. You tell me not to see her as much and be a challenge....um, Ive not be seeing her very often recently already because Ive been busy. You say dont initiate too many texts or respond to quickly to hers....she always initiates if she doesnt here from me during the day.

You previously said texting for the sake of texting is bad, then advise me to lie to this chick and blow off this girl for the sake of blowing her off. What sense are you making here?

So what am I not listening to? Youre trying to give advice to someone whos already been doing these things. And at the same time you dont read everything I write and give conflicting advice.

Agree. She must be getting more covck on the side if she is seeing you only once a week. Women who are into you need constant validation from you.

Ah yes, because she only gets d!ck once a week, the only time she has free time mind you, it must mean shes getting it elsewhere as well. Jeez, while I understand its possible for any woman to stray...you dudes are ignoring the things Im saying about whats going on.

She gets good pipe every single time she sees me, we talk every day...etc etc. One of you are telling me to become more scarce and a bigger challenge...then a couple of you are telling me Im not seeing her enough or talking to her enough.

lol wut?

Sounds to me like she’s exploring other avenues

Every chick I’ve ever known to be 100% into me wants to make contact with me at LEAST once a day

Women need constant reassurance and attention if she needs it from YOU then she will do anything to get it

The fact she’s stopped initiating is enough to set a few alarm bells ringing

Proceed with caution

Another person who doesnt read the thread posts made by the original poster.

Regarding the portion of your post I underlined, she does contact me every single day. And if I dont reach out to her first, she makes sure she does after she gets home from work. I never said she stopped initiating. I said there has been more delays in her responses and that we text less than we used to.

But again, even with that said...we still talk every day.

 

[Dhoulmagus]

OP there's no point in reasoning with them lol. If she takes a hour to reply back than Tyrone ***** her for an extra hour.

 

[Comatozed]

To take a slightly different look at it OP and everyone, this highlights to me the importance of not texting too much even if it is her that's initiating and forcing the conversation in the early days.

The problem with texting a lot, even when it is fun, is that when eventually you start only messaging each other a more reasonable amount (which daily is probably still too much), it feels like the momentum has gone and it isn't what it was.

That's what I've learned, things should always start and move slowly and be moving in the correct direction, that way you avoid becoming invested, avoid being too available, avoid being friendzoned and avoid the awful feeling in your gut when you know its fizzling out.

What was once exciting to her (texting you) sounds like is becoming a chore. And that's cos you gave her too much of you too soon. Girls destroy attraction if you let them!

 

[Octogonal]

OP, don't make a big deal of it until she ignores you. After you've been with a girl for a bit frequency goes down. If she's still initiating texts each day there's not much to worry about.

It's not. It's been proven over and over again that text messaging just for the sake of conversation kills attraction.
Every single DJ related blog and books teach not to text message unless it has a purpose, like to set up a date for instance and not just to say hello.

Proven by whom? The text messaging I've done got me some fine ass pvssy, so I'm certainly not going to listen to someone who is way2dumb. Ask the men here who get flaked on when they text to set up dates how that worked for them.

Of course she says she hated poor response patterns, but also guess what? She loved her ex for it, he was a challenge.

She loved him so much she made him her ex.

text messaging just for the sake of conversation kills attraction.

I would say reply to her texts in an hour or so.

Didn't you say texting kills attraction?

Also if she tries to meet up for sex, say you are busy or have other plans on that day.

Shouldn't you be already be busy if you were important and not pretend to be busy?

Dude, you have no business giving out any advice.

 

[Dhoulmagus]

all these old guys that say texting kills attraction lol. I hate it when people call me because I literally have to stop what I am doing and focus on the phone.

 

[way2smart]

Dude, you have no business giving out any advice.

I will give my advice whenever i want to whomever I want, it's not up to you to decide.

What makes you qualified to give advice? You could be a fat slob hiding behind a keyboard who has never slept with a girl for all I know.

I didn't know you guys had such a fragile ego, so fragile that you had to attack me for piece of advice. Just because you have more green bars under your profile name, means **** in real life, remember that.

Now I see no point in proving or defending any of my advice to you, such a waste of my time.

 

[VikingKing]

She is not
Committed to you. She its your only source of sex at this time. You are not a retard. This is u https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=eeWjzBHUdsI

 

[OnTheRun]

Is that anything to be concerned with? Say youve been seeing someone for a few months, and text is your main mode of conversation...and now you dont have nearly as many convos and you notice response delays (happens on both ends, but mainly the other person's)

Also, this is someone you see about once a week. Sometimes a little longer when schedules are really busy. Sex is still very good, affection is the same in communication and when we arent together.

Also this isnt a girlfriend. So considering the nature of many women nowadays, Im expecting this to end soon tbh. I dont have much trust in any women to let me know upfront that they wanna see other people.

All I know is a part of my gut is telling me to expect something. However, over the few months dating this girl, everytime Ive expected drama or bad news, there hasnt been any and shes surprised me by being pretty honest and normal so far.

So I dunno if Im being over-paranoid, or if my gut will prove right again and that maybe I had reason to be so cautious the last few months.

Women have several "needs". Typically the boyfriend (if suitable) will fill these- sex, validation, dating, emotional support etc (I won't try and give a perfect list).

When a girl is single she cannot get all of these from one place (the boyfriend), so she will mix and match. The effeminate beta friend will go on coffee dates with her, her friends will tell her on instagram she looks great, her Mum/Sister will listen on the phone when she has a bad day, an old flame who's in town will get to bang her...

If she is not seeking your approval/affection via text anymore it is not because her needs have changed- they never do. Her needs are being satisfied by someone else.

Put it this way- how often do you hear a girl say "I think I should text less"?

You're being phased out for the role of texter. Take the redundancy offer of sex in the meantime and prepare for a parting of ways. You'll come out of it looking much better and you might be that "old flame" when she's in town a year or two down the line.

 

[Jaylan]

Update:

Hung out this week, and I was far off. She's actually still very much into me, and seems to be verging on wanting something more. Not much of a hard push on her end thankfully, as she knows Im really focused on work right now...but she definitely put it across that she likes what we have, and wouldnt be adverse to things moving forward in the future.

In other words, she was hinting at a relationship and seemingly gauging my reaction. I wont go into much more detail about what she said, but it gave me something to think about as time rolls on. Im expecting a point in the near future where she wants to make things official. Dunno how Ill deal with that, but we shall see.

Seems I was overthinking before, and some of you were way overthinking more than I. Time will tell though...and Ill keep my guard up as usual precaution.

This all said, SocialLeper and Danger were pretty on-point in their posts. She did seem to hint at wanting me off the market sometime in the future, though I dunno how far away that'll be (Social Leper mentioned her wanting me off the market). And I replied by saying I take things as they come and that I dont plan ahead my dating life the way I used to in my younger days (ambiguity mentioned by Danger)

 

[Dhoulmagus]

Update:

Hung out this week, and I was far off. She's actually still very much into me, and seems to be verging on wanting something more. Not much of a hard push on her end thankfully, as she knows Im really focused on work right now...but she definitely put it across that she likes what we have, and wouldnt be adverse to things moving forward in the future.

In other words, she was hinting at a relationship and seemingly gauging my reaction. I wont go into much more detail about what she said, but it gave me something to think about as time rolls on. Im expecting a point in the near future where she wants to make things official. Dunno how Ill deal with that, but we shall see.

Seems I was overthinking before, and many of you were way overthinking more than I. Time will tell though...and Ill keep my guard up as usual precaution.

See, there was nothing to worry about lol.

 

[Octogonal]

Update:

Hung out this week, and I was far off. She's actually still very much into me, and seems to be verging on wanting something more.

I told you there was nothing to worry about. Most everybody told you it was over.

I will give my advice whenever i want to whomever I want, it's not up to you to decide.

Go ahead. Keep giving out bad advice like you did in this thread. It shows that you know nothing.

What makes you qualified to give advice? You could be a fat slob hiding behind a keyboard who has never slept with a girl for all I know.

HA HA HA. Says the guy who can't get laid from the fatties on dating sites. I told him the correct advice in one sentence. You gave awful advice several times.

I didn't know you guys had such a fragile ego, so fragile that you had to attack me for piece of advice. Just because you have more green bars under your profile name, means **** in real life, remember that.

You weren't being attacked. You were told your advice was crap and it was. I don't care about any green bars. Your ego is fragile since you can't take any constructive criticism and giving me a negative reputation shows your fragile ego.

Now I see no point in proving or defending any of my advice to you, such a waste of my time.

There was no point in posting your advice when it was all wrong and sucked.