When a woman is interested, she'll do ANYTHING to make things happen

[El Payaso]

About two weeks ago, I asked a girl out on a date. We'd already been on two dates so far. She gave an excuse that the weather would be bad due to excessive snow.

I checked the forecast and told her it wouldn't be snowing until the next day. She insisted that it was going to snow so I sent her a picture of the forecast. She saw it and said "Oh, okay. Let's go." Mind you I was also going to pick her up.

I could sense a flake coming anyway and sure enough two hours before the date she texted saying "I'm not feeling well. Let's go another day."

Lmao. I told her "alright" and we never texted again.

Today, my friend tells me about this date he's excited for. He says the girl wants him to pick her up because it will be snowing and she's a bad snow driver. He said she even offered to pay him gas money. He shows me a picture of the girl and sure enough it's ol' girl who flaked.

I couldn't contain my laughter.

Listen to what they say here. If a girl wants to go out with you, she will manipulate the moon and stars to make it happen.

 

[bigneil]

True, but they always come back. I just had a girl come back after 13 months this very minute, ironically as all hope seemed lost with another girl. I actually have 3 girls texting me right now, all 3 asking me out, and I'm devastated that a fourth girl hasn't replied.

 

[Who Dares Win]

Totally agree with the message, as a general rule if we notice any discomfort at gut level its 100% sure that its a red flag the reason of that.

The same moment she puts obstacles for the meeting, doesnt show emotions for the upcoming date, shows uncertainity about details and so on, its a sign of low interest.

A real interested girls will not confuse you, piss you off and most of all will not play any game...after all why an interested girl should run the risk of you walking away or misunderstand things and stop pursuing.

The take away message is LISTEN TO YOUR GUT, forget about your brain, desires or ego, just listen to the gut.

If you feel frustration or discomfort its for a reason.

 

[icantgetlaid]

Agreed 100%

Girls that are interested dont add obstacles when guys ask them out.

Accepting a date is a way for a girl to reciprocate interest while keeping her dignity in tact. Girls HATE giving away any frame ... so if she has high interest .. the last thing she wants to do is run the risk of you not continuing to pursue her ... because it will force her to have to start initiating cold texts TO YOU.

So her making excuses or showing reservation/etc. is her simply stating: I'm not that interested in you, and i don't care if you continue to pursue me or not.

 

[TheGambino]

Yes but you can´t expect a plate to be highly interested after 1 date where you made out.

If she comes with excuses after knowing her for a while, having s3x regulary and seeing eachother every week, then it´s a big red flag yea...

 

[icantgetlaid]

Yes but you can´t expect a plate to be highly interested after 1 date where you made out.

If she comes with excuses after knowing her for a while, having s3x regulary and seeing eachother every week, then it´s a big red flag yea...

I disagree. In my experience, a girl makes a judgement about you right away. During your approach/chat .. during your quick drink at the bar .. what your online dating profile looked like, etc. a girl probably already knows at this point whether she's attracted enough to you for sex. And if she doesn't .. you'll fight an uphill battle of games/indecision/getting nexted (by her) while you try to figure it out.

It simply isn't worth the time investment to continue to pursue someone that doesn't' have initial high interest on first impression of you.

 

[bigneil]

I disagree. In my experience, a girl makes a judgement about you right away. During your approach/chat .. during your quick drink at the bar .. what your online dating profile looked like, etc. a girl probably already knows at this point whether she's attracted enough to you for sex. And if she doesn't .. you'll fight an uphill battle of games/indecision/getting nexted (by her) while you try to figure it out.

It simply isn't worth the time investment to continue to pursue someone that doesn't' have initial high interest on first impression of you.

Yes, almost every girl I ever scored with, I felt a magnetic, instant attraction with the first time I spoke to her. In fact, looking back, the last 8 girls at least were like that. I'm not sure I ever had a girl not like that who I had sex with. Now, that doesn't mean they have sex right away. It just means they like you (a lot) and let you know right away.

 

[nismo-4]

If she's making a bunch of obstacles, just drop her. She's not that attractive and you can do better anyway.

 

[wifehunter]

your friend (assuming no DJ / game) will probably chase her... then, the story will change.

I would expect to hear from her, sometime.

 

[Roober]

Something I am trying to get better at... trusting your gut! The girl I went on a second date with which I was 45 mins late, and probably got a bit too aggressive has been distant the last couple days. The old me would be texting her constantly. I reached out saturday, we texted for a bit, she is busy this week, I will wait till she reaches out, because my gut is telling me I messed it up and it is not worth my time...

On the flip side, just had a nice date and the girl texts me an hour later, "Hey, I had a great time with you tonight. Don't want to sound too forward, but I'm happy to give you my number if you care to get together again." MY gut says "hell yes"

 

[wifehunter]

Something I am trying to get better at... trusting your gut! The girl I went on a second date with which I was 45 mins late, and probably got a bit too aggressive has been distant the last couple days. The old me would be texting her constantly. I reached out saturday, we texted for a bit, she is busy this week, I will wait till she reaches out, because my gut is telling me I messed it up and it is not worth my time...

On the flip side, just had a nice date and the girl texts me an hour later, "Hey, I had a great time with you tonight. Don't want to sound too forward, but I'm happy to give you my number if you care to get together again." MY gut says "hell yes"

Women are supposed to be helpers, and if they are not helping by inconveniencing you and being a pain in the a55...

...Discipline, by withholding attention...

And, if that doesn't work, I'd next them.

If they're not helping the problem, they're part of the problem.

Yes, normally, they should be making things easy. Life is already hard enough!!!

 

[BeExcellent]

Agreed 100%

Girls that are interested dont add obstacles when guys ask them out.

Accepting a date is a way for a girl to reciprocate interest while keeping her dignity in tact. Girls HATE giving away any frame ... so if she has high interest .. the last thing she wants to do is run the risk of you not continuing to pursue her ... because it will force her to have to start initiating cold texts TO YOU.

So her making excuses or showing reservation/etc. is her simply stating: I'm not that interested in you

This is a somewhat nuanced thing and I think men don't always gauge women correctly because different women do different things based on various factors such as upbringing, personality, and past experience.

Your middle paragraph is important. You have some women who will interpret lack of pursuit (the man contacting/asking out/initiating) as lack of interest in her. So it is possible that a self respecting woman may assume you don't like her if she has to chase after you. The best women simply move on in this case and respond to men who display interest through pursuit. A grown man who likes a woman should always make a move. Expecting the woman to initiate/reach out etc. first is to abdicate the leadership role...however it does stroke a guy's ego to be sure.

I think a woman should always text a thank you after a man has carved out time to take her out. This is good manners/respectful and a man should always pay attention to whether a woman expresses gratitude and appreciation.

Just as a woman waffling signals lack of interest to a man (as it should)...a man failing to pursue signals lack of interest to a woman.

Some women will flutter and chase & flatter a man's ego like so many magpies. A swan will simply glide away with dignity.

So it is nuanced depending who you are dealing with.

 

[Who Dares Win]

This is a somewhat nuanced thing and I think men don't always gauge women correctly because different women do different things based on various factors such as upbringing, personality, and past experience.

Your middle paragraph is important. You have some women who will interpret lack of pursuit (the man contacting/asking out/initiating) as lack of interest in her. So it is possible that a self respecting woman may assume you don't like her if she has to chase after you. The best women simply move on in this case and respond to men who display interest through pursuit. A grown man who likes a woman should always make a move. Expecting the woman to initiate/reach out etc. first is to abdicate the leadership role...however it does stroke a guy's ego to be sure.

I think a woman should always text a thank you after a man has carved out time to take her out. This is good manners/respectful and a man should always pay attention to whether a woman expresses gratitude and appreciation.

Just as a woman waffling signals lack of interest to a man (as it should)...a man failing to pursue signals lack of interest to a woman.

Some women will flutter and chase & flatter a man's ego like so many magpies. A swan will simply glide away with dignity.

So it is nuanced depending who you are dealing with.

Disagree in the bolded part, as I said a woman who gives a man any reason to stop pursuing her is a woman whos interest is so low that she doesnt even care if he chase her or not and doesnt really care if he stop pursuing or not.

Your suggestion is wrong, if a woman gives enough reason to a man to drop her its because she is either low interest or playing games (a sign of low interest or screwed up head).

To suggest to "keep pursuing" otherwise she will read as low interest is a blue pill advice that I expect from my grandma or some random middle aged afc married to a woman running the house.

Agree on the part about men taking initiative, thats what we are supposed to do but I confirm what I said above.

An interested girl wont do anything to give the impression of being uninterested, confuse the man or take the risk of him running away...if he stop pursuing its because he understood she confused him, pissed him off or played frustrating mind games.

But again you're a woman, whoever takes fishing advice from a fish instead of a fisher totally deserves what is coming to him.

 

[Glassguy]

I agree with you El Payaso. A woman with high interest, especially if she has made even the slightest investment, will do whatever it takes to see you, if you are the prize. Its all about frame, attraction and her emotions.

One plate of mine works a rotating shift in the medical field. Just this week she literally started moving her shifts around in hopes of seeing me more.

Three points:

1.) I believe a woman knows if she wants to fvck you in the first 30 minutes of your date (assuming you dont have a prior rapport with her). Confidence, abundance, independence and good social skills sell seks if you are a man with plenty to sell. They are buying or passing within that first 30 minutes. Paint the picture for her and she will buy the portrait.

2.) A woman's chasing has a shelf life. That depends on how much attention she gets from other guys, how high her interest level is and how much she has already invested in the chase. The shelf life is generally no longer than 3 months. Any time over than and she is getting things in place to monkey branch. Its no wonder that the monkey branching falls right in line with the timing of the "exclusive talk". When they see they have been played or there is no marriage with you in sight, they start swinging to different branches and cut their loss. The longer a woman stays after this point shows her lack of options, emotional insecurity and other red flags.

3.) A woman can, and will, fall in and out of love overnight.

 

[Bingo-Player]

I agree with you El Payaso. A woman with high interest, especially if she has made even the slightest investment, will do whatever it takes to see you, if you are the prize. Its all about frame, attraction and her emotions.

One plate of mine works a rotating shift in the medical field. Just this week she literally started moving her shifts around in hopes of seeing me more.

Three points:

1.) I believe a woman knows if she wants to fvck you in the first 30 minutes of your date (assuming you dont have a prior rapport with her). Confidence, abundance, independence and good social skills sell seks if you are a man with plenty to sell. They are buying or passing within that first 30 minutes. Paint the picture for her and she will buy the portrait.

2.) A woman's chasing has a shelf life. That depends on how much attention she gets from other guys, how high her interest level is and how much she has already invested in the chase. The shelf life is generally no longer than 3 months. Any time over than and she is getting things in place to monkey branch. Its no wonder that the monkey branching falls right in line with the timing of the "exclusive talk". When they see they have been played or there is no marriage with you in sight, they start swinging to different branches and cut their loss. The longer a woman stays after this point shows her lack of options, emotional insecurity and other red flags.

3.) A woman can, and will, fall in and out of love overnight.

yea i concur ive experience all of those

 

[bigneil]

I disagree. In my experience, a girl makes a judgement about you right away. During your approach/chat .. during your quick drink at the bar .. what your online dating profile looked like, etc. a girl probably already knows at this point whether she's attracted enough to you for sex. And if she doesn't .. you'll fight an uphill battle of games/indecision/getting nexted (by her) while you try to figure it out.

It simply isn't worth the time investment to continue to pursue someone that doesn't' have initial high interest on first impression of you.

For this reason, any bump in the road before sex usually is the death knell for a true romance (that she will savor). After sex you can hit huge potholes and stay on track.

 

[bigneil]

Yes but you can´t expect a plate to be highly interested after 1 date where you made out.

If she comes with excuses after knowing her for a while, having s3x regulary and seeing eachother every week, then it´s a big red flag yea...

Until you've dated at least 2 solid months, her flaking is not a sign of not being interested, it's a sign of not being AS interested (as other guys who she has had long feelings for) YET. Don't give up in this stage, or burn bridge. Rather, simply wait in idle mode and pursue other women.

Men on this forum (probably not from the US) justify past failures by claiming that there exists a woman with whom we should have a perfect, one-way, linear progression from meeting to marriage without any resistance whatsoever, without one cancelled date, without one flake, without one breakup, and with her offering complete commitment after sex happens the first time. Otherwise, she has low interest and you should next her.

Here is how it really is:

1) You meet her and if she REALLY likes you, you make her top 5.
2) You text her and if you hit it off, you bump up to #4.
3) You go on a date and if she REALLY likes you, she will have sex, and you are #3.
4) You date her more than once but less than 60 days and you have sex always, you are #2.
5) After 60+ days of dating you will stay at #2 for about 6 months.
6) If she really wants to marry you, you will move up to #1, but this rarely happens. You never know who #1 is. He's that guy who used her and can call her and take her away at any time.

 

[The Duke]

Yes but you can´t expect a plate to be highly interested after 1 date where you made out.

Totally not my experience...If I can get a girl to go out with me just one time, they are usually hooked. Must be my charm! Or the type of girls I attract. I'd say this happens 98% of the time for me. Very few girls I've ever gone out with didn't want to go out with me again.

 

[Glassguy]

Until you've dated at least 2 solid months, her flaking is not a sign of not being interested, it's a sign of not being AS interested (as other guys who she has had long feelings for) YET. Don't give up in this stage, or burn bridge. Rather, simply wait in idle mode and pursue other women.

Men on this forum (probably not from the US) justify past failures by claiming that there exists a woman with whom we should have a perfect, one-way, linear progression from meeting to marriage without any resistance whatsoever, without one cancelled date, without one flake, without one breakup, and with her offering complete commitment after sex happens the first time. Otherwise, she has low interest and you should next her.

Here is how it really is:

1) You meet her and if she REALLY likes you, you make her top 5.
2) You text her and if you hit it off, you bump up to #4.
3) You go on a date and if she REALLY likes you, she will have sex, and you are #3.
4) You date her more than once but less than 60 days and you have sex always, you are #2.
5) After 60+ days of dating you will stay at #2 for about 6 months.
6) If she really wants to marry you, you will move up to #1, but this rarely happens. You never know who #1 is. He's that guy who used her and can call her and take her away at any time.

I agree with most of this. The point I agree with the most is remaining idle. I never burn bridges, but I also REFUSE to initiate contact after a chick flakes. If she comes back around, chances are I will be very withdrawn and busy and she will have to put forth major effort to isolate me to a "date". Some will do that, some wont. They have to see the high value in you after the flake or it will never happen. And you have to be wishy washy with them after the flake as well.

The part I disagree with is this: If you fvck her the way she wants to be fvcked, treat her well when you are out, you are the prize, she is chasing......there will be no others in the picture. Physically or emotionally.

When I find out (and I am good at finding out) there is someone else in the picture, they are immediately put on the bench and demoted even to below plate status. I just dont compete well with others and dont have the time to do so.

 

[Glassguy]

Totally not my experience...If I can get a girl to go out with me just one time, they are usually hooked. Must be my charm! Or the type of girls I attract. I'd say this happens 98% of the time for me. Very few girls I've ever gone out with didn't want to go out with me again.

I am the same way. I am mysterious and scarce between dates, but when I show up I am engaged in them and my charisma, confidence and frame really come off strong.