What's a deal breaker/ red flag(s) for you?

[Imdonswanson]

Just curious as to what the general consensus is on this forum


What's a deal breaker, red flag(s) that make you distance and eventually stop talking to a girl?

 

[pbsurf]

Just curious as to what the general consensus is on this forum


What's a deal breaker, red flag(s) that make you distance and eventually stop talking to a girl?

Be more specific with your question - at what stage? Early on/pre dating/1st date?

further down the line after a few months?

 

[Dhoulmagus]

When I have to put more work for less responsiveness

 

[mikey2012]

Someone else's semen in her mouth

 

[Uncharted]

More than two cats or tattoos.

Doesn't have a lot of girl friends.

 

[Fireballs]

Her box stinks.

 

[Special EDy]

Too clingy or says too many suggestive comments about getting serious.

Im not in any hurry to settle down and Im not going into any relationship with the warped perspective of finding a soul mate. If it happens, it happens, and hopefully someday I'll find a woman I actually like that much. But until then I think Im gonna need to meet and have relations with as many women as possible. Better to stumble onto someone you like than walking around with rose colored glasses on.

 

[Zarky]

No sex on first date.

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

+1.

but on a more poignant note; i have standards, but the way i am with women (people in general) these days i treat them with so much indifference it would seem like i dont.

there really isnt much that phases me anymore. the days of hoping for that idealized perfect quality girl that loves me for me and is loyal are so far behind me that to think that way is ludicrous. i havent seeked womb like security from a woman in years and dont expect much of anything from anyone. i treat women with respect so far as they allow themselves to be treated that way. once they lose my respect im pretty ruthless and terrible to them. not in an outright abusive way or anything, like i said its more like i really dont give a shlt.

banged another dude? thats fine, hope you didnt get knocked up

like one of my friends? go for it. maybe we can run train on you. get a friend and we got an orgy goin.

cold shoulder? thank god, maybe i can watch the game or a movie in peace.

want to hang out with co workers or girls night out? have fun, i'll probably be at the bar having drunk white girls poking me in the chest and exclaiming "youre sexy" or chat with an interesting bar tender that likes the Ramones and cheesey 80s music as much as i do.

ironically its when i stopped yearning and caring that i didnt have to work hard at all to make sure everything was operating under my frame because once you strip them of their sexual agency over you, how can they harm or manipulate you?

You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to MidnightCity again.

 

[Imdonswanson]

Well I should of specified usually for the first few dates/ ""honeymoon phase""


For me- some crazy ass personal story, talking too much about ex, or overly sexual those are red flags for me.

 

[VladPatton]

Off the top of my head:

- Plays hard to get with intertwining interest/disinterest
- Religious
- Wants a family....tomorrow
- Prude
- Has the sense of humor of a used condom
- Is a head pill popper
- Dirty lifestyle/snatch smells like a 30 day can of opened tuna
- Full-on Buckwheat-in-a-leg-lock style bush or Buckwheat-in-a-head-lock style arm pits

...and many other fun ones

 

[AttackFormation]

Smoking. How unhealthy it is kinda disqualifies these girls from ltrs but the most significant factor is how disgusting it is to me as a non-smoker. Having to inhale that cr@p at someone else's leisure without being able to return the favor somehow makes me angry enough and kissing a smoker is disgusting too. That's why I won't even f*ck girls who smoke.

 

[Zapp Brannigan]

Fake
High maintenance
Can't get along with other girls
Has male orbiters she leads on
Excessive tattoos/piercings

 

[The Duke]

excellent advice Midnight. On the $$$$ Its the only way you can keep your sanity dealing with modern day woman.

 

[GS750]

More than 1 or 2 tattoos
Religious
No sense of humor
Lots of guy friends
Stage 5 clinger
Way too insecure
Too demanding
Older than me by a year or two
Children
Smoker...I'm a former smoker and can't even stand the smell anymore
Hard to get. Not gonna chase you.
Criminal record or drug user. Given my profession that's not gonna work for me

 

[nismo-4]

1. Mixed signals
2. Playing hard to get/ is distant
3. No hand holding/ kissing/ sex on the first date
4. Being a prude/ shy
5. Lots of guy friends
6. Plays too many games
7. High maintenance/ gold digger vibe
8. Has little sense of humor.
9. High history of cheating.
10. Can't keep a man.
11. Can't get along with other women.
12. Is always unsure.
13. Makes an argument or court case out of damn near anything.

To name a few.

 

[Peacebewithyou]

Mostly guy friends
Cheated on past partners
Party Girl, drugs, alcohol abuse
No moral center
High partner count
Tattoos, even 1 depending on placement
Extroverted + Perceiving personality type
Cant take a joke/bad personality/insecure/walking on eggshells
Too dumb

Royalflush, what do you mean by extroverted + perceiving personality type?

 

[expos]

1. If they have kids
2. if they smoke pot or do drugs of any kind
3. If they have cheated, or if they were married and they cheated on their husband
4. If they are excessively overweight
5. History of depression or if they are on any type of mood-stabilizing prescription drugs
6. If they have no friends
7. High maintenance or gold digger
8. Selfish
9. If they have no job, or work a dead end job, or work a job that requires very little skill (secretary, receptionist, human resources - they are all gossip queens)
10. If they work at a bar.

 

[The LadyKiller]

Royalflush, what do you mean by extroverted + perceiving personality type?

I know a girl like this. She is extremely outgoing and portrays herself as being very friendly and nice, but in fact is a total b*tch. In other words, a girl who is fake.

As for some of my turnoffs:
-Is fake and insincere
(If I detect a fake persona, I leave without looking back. Can't date someone who is focused on manipulation and power plays)
-Smoker
-Drug abuse
(Smoking and/or drug use often lead to disastrous results)
-Lots of tatoos
(I've never been into tattoo. Girls I know who have many have a sketchy past.)
-Plays a lot of games
(High school was long, long ago)
-Does not communicate well
(If something important arises and she take 6 hours to respond for no good reason, etc.)
-Has a kid
-Has an STD
(Self-explanatory)

 

[IBreatheSpears]

The first one that comes to mind is if she mentions feminism too early on or too often. I don't mind feminists so long as they aren't ret­arded but if they mention it early on it implies they're one of the radical types and if they talk about it a lot I know I'm gonna get annoyed. Another is if they admit to having feelings for an ex (OkCupid handily has a question about this which many girls seem to answer truthfully). Another is if they've cheated more than once in the past, or if they cheat with me (I'd still be in an open relationship or FWB in those cases). Oh yeah, STDs and not using a condom with other men is another one. I don't care if she sleeps with other guys before we agree to be exclusive, because I'm gonna sleep with other girls up until then, but I get preferential treatment, so regardless of what birth control she's on, she's not allowed to give head to or have unprotected sex with other dudes ('cause I don't wanna be thinking "can I taste cu­m?" while kissing her or going down -- if I found out a girl was having unprotected sex with or giving blo­wjo­bs to other guys and then kissing/having sex with me, heads would roll).

I'm not really bothered about specifics. I don't get how people can have red flags like "excessively overweight" because to me, a red flag/dealbreaker is when you're attracted to someone but they have a flaw that's unacceptable. If someone is boring, obese or mistreats me, then I'm not attracted to them in the first place.