what to say when she rebuffs your date idea as 'cheap'?

[DonJuan11]

She says what we have planned is cheap when I call for the first date meeting. Is it possible to lose a girl cos you're being 'too' cheap?

Generally girls don't like cheap guys, but the purpose of your date isn't to give her a nice coffee or a nice meal, it is to attract HER to YOU and make A MOVE on her. She should be wanting to be with and have sex with you so bad that she doesn't care if you give her a $2 coffee or a $200 steak dinner.

When she says "what you've planned is cheap", she sees you as boring and you have not won her over with anything you have. You need to STEP YOUR GAME UP.

 

[jophil28]

If someone ever...

ever

ever

referred to your GIFT of offering to spend time with them as cheap, then the only comeback is to walk away. Why waste time with some "cool line" or witty retort to someone who you'd never want to involve in your life again?

F that.

I've had to bring a couple girls back to reality after trying to upsell the dating venue, (i.e., instead of cool bar, let's do fancy restaurant), but I couldn't imagine one of these chicks having the audacity to call me cheap.

^^ This is the way and the truth.
My sentiments exactly.

 

[the305]

lol @ the forget her and leave her responses... you arent of any value to her, improve ur game so girls want to hang out for you and not a fancy meal, insteaad of blaming some girl that doesnt even know you. man up

 

[Mantis Toboggan]

thats l mindset of "its them its not me" like a "your loss"

the problem is there is no loss because you arent of any value to her, improve ur game so girls want to hang out for you and not a fancy meal, insteaad of blaming some girl that doesnt even know you. man up

You consistently give the worst advice I've ever seen on these boards.

It's not about "your loss". It's about not wasting your time on a girl who cares about how much money you spend on a date.

Walking away from a girl like that is a win for both sides. The guy doesn't waste time on a greedy *hore and the girl gets to wait for a sucker to spend money on her.

Part of improving your game is knowing when to walk away from a money grubber.

 

[bigjohnson]

You consistently give the worst advice I've ever seen on these boards.

I still like "How much do you normally get?" as the best response. Don't understand why guys put up with this. After a while, and maybe I'm weak, but if she's been putting out and doing what I need her to do, maybe a little housekeeping or some home cooking, then I have no issue with some give and take but first thing like this? No.

"How much do you normally get?"

She can either walk or rethink her priorities, at that point I don't care which.

 

[teacha]

nerd wars......

 

[Jitterbug]

Regarding Kailex's post and the walking away thing...

Sure, the moment a chick says something like that to me, she's dropped from whatever I thought of her to pump & dump level or lower.

However, I do enjoy fvcking with their heads. That's why my suggestion is to amplify the cheapness by going from ice cream to M&M. I don't take these girls seriously. Any response of that type is good, like "how much you normally get?"

I prefer walking away with a good laugh, to just walking away saying nothing (it's useful in cases with high emotional investment though), because in cases like this with low to non-existing investment, girls will rationalise your reaction as you being angry and offended.

 

[Zarky]

I would be so shocked if a woman said this to me that I would be speechless. Of course, any interest I had in her would immediately sink into the abyss forever so I don't think it would matter what response I came up with. I'd probably try to think up the quickest way to end the current interaction and never deal with her again.

 

[Berlex]

Tell her to pay up or put out.

 

[joe henny]

What?

Its simple. you build rapport and comfort first, then you start flirting and sexually escalate. Thats universal across the board with exceptions of course, but its a generally a good rule to follow.

You will get put in friend zone if you escalate too early or too late, after a while you will have an intuition of when its time to escalate- it could be anywhere from 5 minutes to the 5th meetup.

I don't understand what you're trying to say....

5th meetup!? I'm sorry but I have a 3 time rule after the third meetup I just keep on moving. Waste of time meeting that many times when I can find another.

 

[joe henny]

You consistently give the worst advice I've ever seen on these boards.

It's not about "your loss". It's about not wasting your time on a girl who cares about how much money you spend on a date.

Walking away from a girl like that is a win for both sides. The guy doesn't waste time on a greedy *hore and the girl gets to wait for a sucker to spend money on her.

Part of improving your game is knowing when to walk away from a money grubber.

Wow Mantis that is a very good post I was wrong about you

 

[the305]

work on improving your GAME, not you ability to NEXT a girl thats not TOTALLY into you because your game ISNT good.

its hard to swallow i know

 

[joe henny]

work on improving your GAME, not you ability to NEXT a girl thats not TOTALLY into you because your game ISNT good.

its hard to swallow i know

This GAME word is over used now. Honestly it goes like this a females either attracted to you or she's not. So it doesn't matter how much "Game" you throw in her ear if she finds you physically unattractive. Some females will put out because they're *****s and others because thy have a really high level of attraction to you.

I do agree that many guys on hear take this NEXT thing too far and delete girls numbers over retarded reasons do to lack of ego, but I also feel men should know when to cut their losses (5 dates) no action. The whole NEXT thing goes too far when a nerd gets butt hurt because a date is running late and decides to NEXT her. I rarely do this whole NEXT thing unless I am completely done with a chick the most I'll usually do is put a mark next to their name in my phone to remind me that that is a girl showing less interest. I will then focus on the women who are showing the most interest and focus on making things happen with them.

Once done with the high interest ones, I'l try again with the low interest ones if they're still a no-go I forget em.

 

[TheAsianLoverReturns]

This GAME word is over used now. Honestly it goes like this a females either attracted to you or she's not. So it doesn't matter how much "Game" you throw in her ear if she finds you physically unattractive. Some females will put out because they're *****s and others because thy have a really high level of attraction to you.

I do agree that many guys on hear take this NEXT thing too far and delete girls numbers over retarded reasons do to lack of ego, but I also feel men should know when to cut their losses (5 dates) no action. The whole NEXT thing goes too far when a nerd gets butt hurt because a date is running late and decides to NEXT her. I rarely do this whole NEXT thing unless I am completely done with a chick the most I'll usually do is put a mark next to their name in my phone to remind me that that is a girl showing less interest. I will then focus on the women who are showing the most interest and focus on making things happen with them.

Once done with the high interest ones, I'l try again with the low interest ones if they're still a no-go I forget em.

Right on dog.

Game isn't some f*cking magic bullet. It only gets you the women that are physically attracted to you.

 

[Lucifero]

I think some of you are missing a very vital point - the girls perspective.

loveshogun, Iceberg, Kailex and others are all on the same page of.. if a girl thinks your cheap in anyway for taking HER out, you need to get rid of her, I think its WAY to premature for you to make that assumption, and here it why.

Girls have girl talk atleast 12 times a day on average(i soo made this up), if she tells her girls she went on a "date" and you took her to eat at dennys/subway/etc. DO BELIEVE you will be the talk of the week, of how cheap you are, and she will be advised to NOT see you again from her girlfriends, women ALWAYS want the best for themselves, they have guys wanting to take them out left and right, so how else are they going to weed through the losers? For some this is their way of doing that, it doesn't make them "gold diggers" necessarily

matter fact most of my girl friends who are extremely hot and some of the coolest down to earth girls i know, would not be caught dead on a date with a guy at subway or dennys, ONLY because thats the first impression, if they already went out, she wouldnt have a problem at all going to subway or dennys.

IMPRESSIONS COUNT remember that.

SOLUTION:

What can we do as guys?

One way is to frame it as a casual meetup maybe at a mall or something for you look at some outfits, you can even get her advise on what looks good on you, then you can swing by and get some ice cream.. have some really awesome conversations.. do some silly stuff like put funny glasses or hats on her, you know really hit it off.

NOW you are the talk of the girl chat as the really awesome guy shes interested in AND you even paid for her ice cream, even if it was only like 4 bucks. Was it a date? Who knows.. Who cares.. It Doesn't matter. What matters is, she is now thinking about you.

You as a guy have the power to control the situation in a way thats presented in YOUR favor, but you have to know HOW a girl thinks.

P.S. who ever stated a walk in the park and icecream doesn't move towards building or expressing sexual interest in a woman, you dont express sexual interest until she is ready, she wont be ready without rapprt and comfort, so you build that first. unless shes puts out like a porn star...

i didnt know i have to bring girls to specific places to express that i want to bang them....

Shut the **** up. It aint about her, its about YOU. Who gives a **** about her or what she wants?

 

[Mantis Toboggan]

Shut the **** up. It aint about her, its about YOU. Who gives a **** about her or what she wants?

No. The305 is involved in lots of "girl talks", so he can teach us the way of the woman.

 

[loveshogun]

work on improving your GAME, not you ability to NEXT a girl thats not TOTALLY into you because your game ISNT good.

its hard to swallow i know

This, I have to admit, is true, even though you've stumbled onto this truth by gesticulating nonsense and passivity for the last few pages. I'll play your game and reason with you anyway.

My main issue here is that never, at any point, did you tell this guy to next THIS girl. It became apparent that he's only worried about being "cheap" for this one girl, and others like her.

You know, the kind of girl that should be nexted.

And in that context, your advice to this guy, someone who you think needs to work on his game, is to try to figure out why she's not interested.

This is where I scratch my head.

No disrepect, 305, but the girl found a reason to complain about something that did not merit complaints.

How will this be helpful, ever?

Why SHOULDN'T she be nexted?

It's not like women are creatures whose behaviors are utterly dependent on the social status of the person she's talking to. It's not like once Don Juan appears she'll suddenly not be b*tchy. She might HIDE it better, sure, but it'll be there ready to bite a guy in the a*s.

This type of behavior that early on is a big 'ole red flag for a whiny, needy princess. ESPECIALLY given the OP's description of her going off to her little Malibu Girls' club and blabbing about her "cheap date."

A girl worth pursuing wouldn't have been rude about it, and wouldn't have had the ridiculous sense of entitlement.

These women exist, and can be found by not wasting time with the b*tchy ones, and THAT'S where the focus should be on having good enough game to win one.

So, once again I concede that you make a good point - nexting is not the hallmark of a successful man.

But, you know what's the hallmark of an unsuccessful man?

Chasing after any investment that gives no returns, or even PROSPECTS for returns.

 

[big weezy]

Take this example: If the girls i'm picking up are girls from rich areas who wear designer clothes and are generally spoilt to expensive dinners by rich AFCs and become accustomed from that lifestyle.

Walking away from the girls isn't going to help me sleep with them, assuming that's what I'm looking for how do you get these sorts of girls?

Some are rich daddys girls, some are gold diggers, some subscribe to high lifestyle living and once they get a taste of that they refuse to go back.

If she rebuffs my date idea, but doesnt necessarily calls it cheap just suggests a more expensive alternative, what is the response i should give?

i know i should maintain my frame.

 

[bigjohnson]

If she rebuffs my date idea, but doesnt necessarily calls it cheap just suggests a more expensive alternative, what is the response i should give?

"Ah, I see, you want to take me out. How sweet!"

 

[Iceberg]

If she rebuffs my date idea, but doesnt necessarily calls it cheap just suggests a more expensive alternative, what is the response i should give?

Then respond with a cheaper alternative.

I mean, what kind of answer do you expect the guys here to give you? If you've got the girl interested in going on a date with you in the first place, I'd like to think that the venue isn't going to make or break you. If the venue DOES make or break you, then you're dating a skank. So who cares.

I'm not even sure what you're asking for. You want some kind of smooth one-liner? Because some memorized one-liner you learned from an internet site is just going to sound corny anyway. You gotta speak in your own voice.

And if you're not looking for a one-liner, then just use common sense to deal with the problem. You shouldn't be taking girls out for dinner unless she's your actual girlfriend anyway.