What makes girls obsessed with a man?

Captain Rizz

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Big dvck too. .
Not only does it feel good to them. It is exciting psychologically. And they can brag to their friends.
I have a very big "dvck" too... I don't think physical stuff is what leads to obsession.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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Sure. But is this principle equal between the genders?
Both men and women want what they don't have. And many of them will lose interest if they get it. So, yes, the principle works for both genders. When a woman is 'hard to get', men get obsessed about her. If a man cannot be led around by his trouser snake, women will double their efforts.
I've had a few female stalkers. Obsession is fed by being unavailable.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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The definition of insanity is doing the same thing repeatedly expecting a different results each time.
While obsession can be seen as crazy, it's not always insane.
 

CornbreadFed

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Meets her fantasia type criteria, knows how to push the right buttons. You can't mold yourself into this man, you are either her type or not.
 

BeExcellent

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Advice from the old lady:

It's about being unique and desirable but yet elusive. That is the nature of a great seducer and let's be real, great seducers are RARE but consistently desirable and consistently elusive.

If you want a full dissertation and well researched tome on the subject read Art of Seduction by Robert Greene. It goes deeply into detail about the psychology of seduction, which of course is the psychology of obsession.

Bear in mind that desirable yet elusive go hand in hand. This reflects emotional unavailability, wanting what one cannot have, etc as noted by other posters in this thread. There is an aloofness about such a person. But there is also that ability to back it up.

Examples:

My husband was obsessed years ago over a girl he met in an internet chat room. She tantalized him over the messages in the chat one night & when he called her out on it she drove 3 hours in the middle of the night to meet him, banged his brains out like a freak all night and then she vanished out of his life never to be heard from again. He never knew her name but he was "messed up" over that girl for months back then and still recalls that whole experience with clarity and awe. But she was an elusive fantasy and based on her behavior she knew that and knew exactly what she was doing. He was merely a conquest, notch & good story to her.

My ex BF of 3 years will never get over me. I was exactly what he wanted but he set the rules and would not be fully committed. Fine. I played by his rules so he was never able to fully possess me and I never ever chased him like other women. He fell deeply in love with me but got physical one night so things ended abruptly.

4 years later I am out with my husband & run into ex BF. He is cordial, wants to be best mates with my husband, trying to catch up with me, his best friend tells me they have talked countless hours about me over the years, I'm the one who got away etc. For 6 weeks after running into him randomly he tries to re-establish contact. He's been blocked for years on everything but he got creative, established new social media accounts and proceeded to full court press me any way he could think of. I never responded to anything. Thankfully he has stopped (I showed my husband everything, total transparency). And I asked my husband to please listen next time when I say it's best not to show up somewhere he goes....

It is a combination of being desirable & yet elusive. Read Art of Seduction.
 

RickTheToad

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Most people have encountered women who still are fixated on a male ex after years and years. Some people have even encountered a man who has this effect on women.

This is different from being good with women. It's different from making them attracted to you or getting them into bed, and it's even kind of different from being able to easily get the girlfriend of your choice.

So what is it? What creates this enduring obsession in women?
I will say this over and over again: If you are looking for a long-term relationship or marriage, you need to look for a female one or two notches below you. She will always look up to you and know that you're the prize, not her. I've dated 8s and 9s, and all they produce are headaches. Rest assured, if you build yourself up to an 8 or 9, and date a 6/7, you will be sitting pretty in life. If you're a 9 and date a 9, it's going to be a pain in the a$$.
 

pipeman84

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I will say this over and over again: If you are looking for a long-term relationship or marriage, you need to look for a female one or two notches below you. She will always look up to you and know that you're the prize, not her. I've dated 8s and 9s, and all they produce are headaches. Rest assured, if you build yourself up to an 8 or 9, and date a 6/7, you will be sitting pretty in life. If you're a 9 and date a 9, it's going to be a pain in the a$$.
Those are so relative and subjective they're in fact meaningless ... there is no objective criteria to define an 8, a 9 etc. Not only that, but they are dynamic ... that 9 girl becomes a 6 after gaining 25 pounds. A 9 can instantly become an 1 if it turns out she did some hardcore porn. That 6 guy becomes a 9 after a few years, once he matures and his income increases.
 

RickTheToad

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Those are so relative and subjective they're in fact meaningless ... there is no objective criteria to define an 8, a 9 etc. Not only that, but they are dynamic ... that 9 girl becomes a 6 after gaining 25 pounds. A 9 can instantly become an 1 if it turns out she did some hardcore porn. That 6 guy becomes a 9 after a few years, once he matures and his income increases.
Whatever you say dude.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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A 9 can instantly become an 1 if it turns out she did some hardcore porn.
... with a bisexual male and then tweets about it torpedoing her career and taking her own life.
 

NealIRC

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My husband was obsessed years ago over a girl he met in an internet chat room. She tantalized him over the messages in the chat one night & when he called her out on it she drove 3 hours in the middle of the night to meet him, banged his brains out like a freak all night and then she vanished out of his life never to be heard from again. He never knew her name but he was "messed up" over that girl for months back then and still recalls that whole experience with clarity and awe. But she was an elusive fantasy and based on her behavior she knew that and knew exactly what she was doing. He was merely a conquest, notch & good story to her.
So this was revenge, wasn't it?
 

BeExcellent

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So why did she do it?
The chat room chick? No idea. Maybe she routinely did stuff like that, maybe she was horny, etc Maybe she thought my husband was full of shjt or full of himself, who knows (and he probably was full of himself at that time.) Maybe she was married & wanted to get down & dirty. Who knows. It was years before I knew him.

She had him sprung, rocked his world every which way according to him, and vanished. Quite the ONS, lol.
 

NealIRC

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The chat room chick? No idea. Maybe she routinely did stuff like that, maybe she was horny, etc Maybe she thought my husband was full of shjt or full of himself, who knows (and he probably was full of himself at that time.) Maybe she was married & wanted to get down & dirty. Who knows. It was years before I knew him.

She had him sprung, rocked his world every which way according to him, and vanished. Quite the ONS, lol.
But sounds like she planned to kick it with him then disappear in his life, so he must have did something to her in the chatrooms. Like maybe he boasted about himself with a big ego.
 
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