SunnyD said:
Did I SAY I was trying to change it??? No. I said I KNOW it, so now I can choose to avoid it.
BTW, is the whole coined-phrase here not "Attraction is not a choice?" We do not choose to be atrracted to a$$holes...and in the end it is all about the decisions you make. You can't change anyone...we may think for a minute that we can...much to be compared to all of your "captain save-a-ho" theories I've read over and over again on here. Good women (believe it or not) like blue and I..find ourselves falling for a man who can't (or doesn't want to) committ..and we feel compelled to try and change that.
It's through reading here, that I have realized you simply cannot. But men and women are a lot more alike in this thinking than you realize....we are looking for that challenge too, sure..and when it becomes impossible to achieve (you guys here after women you can't have, and women like me who are after a man who doesn't want it..) you try harder for it then eventually give up. How are we any different from you???
What you women don't seem to realize is that we're only doing what works. Period. And you can't argue with results. Despite everything Blue08 has been through,all the misery,all the pain,all the getting cheated on,all the constant complaining about the things this guys does and says to hurt her and degrade her,despite ALL that,she still
chooses to be with him.
This could have been over with 2 years ago when she first found out that the two of them wanted different things. I read some of your past posts SunnyD,and even though the things you described seemed like nothing but perpetual heartache and pain,you still stayed with that guy. It was only up until you very life/existance was threatened (the health scare) that you decided to end things,and even then,I'd bet you struggled with leaving him.
I once saw an episode of Dr. Phil where there was a woman on there whose ex-boyfriend has shot her in her eye. He shot her in her eye,and guess why she was on the show. She was on the show because she was considering going back to him. He tried to kill her,and even that didn't make her want to leave him. Not only that,but when the police arrived on the scene,she LIED to them,and said that it was an accident.
I would say that I feel sorry for what Blue08 is going through,but how can you feel sorry for someone who intentionally,on purpose,chooses to be hurt?
I 100% wholeheartedly agree with Kontroller X,DJDamage,I'm charming,and the other posters. I don't like it. I wish there could be a way that both the man and woman could BOTH be happy and have what they want,but this is just how it is.
Based on results,the things that Blue08 is conplaining about works.
Based on reults,the things that SunnyD complains about works.
But the crazy part about all this is that if this guy Blue08 is complaining about were to suddenly start doing and being what she
says she wants,she'd drop him in a heartbeat,and I myself,and every guy here knows that.