Well Im just gonna ask you guys for some help with this one

[captain55]

Ive been talking to this fine ass chick for a while, she's successful and extremely desirable has tons of guys after her. I made out with her twice, we went on two dates....problem is she lives about two hours away from me which has made it very difficult to use any sort of game...I shouldnt have to explain why.

I call her up the other day after not talking for weeks and we talk for about ten minutes.... and she tells me her parents are going out of town thursday for a few days and says I can come over and hang out if I want. Keep in mind she's a flake though, she doesnt trust me at all and knows that if she has me over Im gonna try to sleep with her. plus I haven't seen her in two months..I guess hearing me talk on the phone resparked the connection.

Yesterday I tried an experiment by not responding to her text messages, she texts me back the next day. " Hey you I got blank messages from you last night what was your last text" could I be dealing with NPD here? Definitely not a borderline she comes from a good family.


Assuming she is a NPD how would you play the situation up until Thursday? I'm seriously considering ignoring her completely for four days and texting her thursday afternoon last minute, almost make her think that she was my last option or backup chick....sounds crazy but being considerate about her schedule and acting like I Want to get to know her hasn't done **** for me, if anything I feel like its just hurt the attraction. And right now shes attracted to me again. Problem is shes texting me quite a bit, woke up this morning and shes sending me selfies etc should I just not respond or what?

 

[Infern0]

Ive been talking to this fine ass chick for a while, she's successful and extremely desirable has tons of guys after her. I made out with her twice, we went on two dates....problem is she lives about two hours away from me which has made it very difficult to use any sort of game...I shouldnt have to explain why.

I call her up the other day after not talking for weeks and we talk for about ten minutes.... and she tells me her parents are going out of town thursday for a few days and says I can come over and hang out if I want. Keep in mind she's a flake though, she doesnt trust me at all and knows that if she has me over Im gonna try to sleep with her. plus I haven't seen her in two months..I guess hearing me talk on the phone resparked the connection.

Yesterday I tried an experiment by not responding to her text messages, she texts me back the next day. " Hey you I got blank messages from you last night what was your last text" could I be dealing with NPD here? Definitely not a borderline she comes from a good family.


Assuming she is a NPD how would you play the situation up until Thursday? I'm seriously considering ignoring her completely for four days and texting her thursday afternoon last minute, almost make her think that she was my last option or backup chick....sounds crazy but being considerate about her schedule and acting like I Want to get to know her hasn't done **** for me, if anything I feel like its just hurt the attraction. And right now shes attracted to me again. Problem is shes texting me quite a bit, woke up this morning and shes sending me selfies etc should I just not respond or what?

I'm assuming that there must have been more to this story for you to be thinking this chick is NPD

Regardless, PD girls can be used for a **** buddy but obviously nothing more, your game has to be TIGHT like 100% and you have to stay emotionally detached. Only extremely advanced guys should dabble in this stuff.

But I'll give you some practical advice, essentially you need to be aloof but interested, you need to break the physical barrier ASAP because if a PD friend zones you its damn near impossible to get out.

You need to stay aloof until the hamster brain is in full on per suit mode then you meet and go balls deep.

No talking about emotions, no I love you no talk of relationship, keep it fun and light, do not get into anything deep.

If she's PD she will attempt to break you by love bombing, if you can stay detached and not give in then you can keep her locked in the pull cycle for quite a long time. Be aware that the second you reciprocate any kind of feelings you activate the unstoppable devaluation timer.

Be aware though that she could jump to a new target at any point, the idea is to get what you want out of her for as long as you can and be ready to move on in an instant. This'll also allow for periodical recycles.

 

[captain55]

I'm assuming that there must have been more to this story for you to be thinking this chick is NPD

Regardless, PD girls can be used for a **** buddy but obviously nothing more, your game has to be TIGHT like 100% and you have to stay emotionally detached. Only extremely advanced guys should dabble in this stuff.

But I'll give you some practical advice, essentially you need to be aloof but interested, you need to break the physical barrier ASAP because if a PD friend zones you its damn near impossible to get out.

You need to stay aloof until the hamster brain is in full on per suit mode then you meet and go balls deep.

No talking about emotions, no I love you no talk of relationship, keep it fun and light, do not get into anything deep.

If she's PD she will attempt to break you by love bombing, if you can stay detached and not give in then you can keep her locked in the pull cycle for quite a long time. Be aware that the second you reciprocate any kind of feelings you activate the unstoppable devaluation timer.

Be aware though that she could jump to a new target at any point, the idea is to get what you want out of her for as long as you can and be ready to move on in an instant. This'll also allow for periodical recycles.

I have experience with a borderline who had some narcissistic tendencies but never a NPD. I doubt this girl is a borderline being that her parents are well off and shes an only child.

No doubt in my mind that I would of banged her by now had she been closer but the girl lives an hour and a half away and works pretty late. She's flaked on me a couple times but I act like it never happened... Im not going to get on a chick not driving two hours to see me at 9 oclock at night for a third date.

I think she genuinely had intentions on meeting up with me several times, then was just too tired. so I stopped talking to her....then randomly call her up the other day and she invites me over saying her parents are going out of town. So if she flakes on me this time Im deleting her number for sure.

How does a guy not seem like a thirsty ass mother****er to the girl, when he's willing to drive an hour and a half to see her though? I just feel like she has all the power in this situation. I dont see her driving all the way out here to see me, not until after I bang her and get her attached to me anyways.

 

[SmooveMooves]

Dude, just cause she does something funky doesn't make her magically conflicted with a mental disorder. Just like if you spend a lot of time in the mirror, that doesn't automatically make you a narcissist. You guys kill me with that.

Anyway, follow Mauser96's advice and you should be a golden boy.

 

[captain55]

Set a time up for you to go there Thursday, make it a firm time, then don't text again. Respond as sparingly as you can. PHONE her the day you are to leave. Confirm by VOICE BEFORE LEAVING.


FWIW, I wouldn't get too serious about a girl 2 hours away.

her- "so are you going to spend the night when you come Thursday?"
me - "yeah"
her- "Ok cool"
her- "I kind of wanna see you before that though"
her- "seems kind of far away"


So basically what Im getting at from those texts is that she was having second thoughts....and wants to see me in person again before she decides to sleep with me. But Im not going out there before thursday.

damn this is tough

 

[captain55]

its wednesday night fellas. I Still haven't texted her since we talked sunday, remember I was going to spend the night with her tomorrow.

I know she is probably expecting me to text her tonight but part of me doesn't want to. Shes pretty hot, I dont think any guy has every blown her off. Be curious to see what would happen if I did, me thinks she would beg for me to come over out of validation.

 

[captain55]

I have not texted this ***** in three days and she texts me first tonight out of the blue.

Me- "so are we still on for tomorrow?"

Her response "Id like to but unfortunately no. I just feel like we want different things in life"

me "so you dont want a relationship?"

Her "I do. Im just having anxiety about this lol"

Me "So you can honestly say you've felt the same way about another guy as you did when you kissed me?"

Her "no probably not"

I havent responded back. Here are my options

1. Don't text her at all, see if she hits me up tomorrow night.

2. Text her a picture of me with a chick way hotter than her I hooked up with from the other night with a nice F U C K you text.

3. Text her that same picture and tell her that I turned down sex with her because I was too busy looking forward to seeing you. .

she's 27, she knows Im 22.......and figures Im just trying to hit it. I think going full on beta, telling her I want a relationship with her and want to be exclusive might be the only way here. But I dont see how sending the picture will hurt at this point.

 

[Between_The_Lines]

I dont see how sending the picture will hurt at this point.

Strongly disagree. Both your second and third option (mostly the second) scream: "You hurt me!! How could you!? Meanie!!!" Not reacting won't "hurt" you at this juncture. She ought to be the one blowing things out of proportion, not you - EVER.

The bigger question you ought to be confronting is why on Earth are you considering bending over backwards and playing up the beta persona for a girl who lives two hours away from you? You shouldn't be shoving your d1ck between your legs for a girl PERIOD, but for a girl who technically would amount to a long distance relationship, has a "ton" of orbiters on her ass (read: annoyingly high maintenance) and is tossing you one curveball after another? Come on dude.

In any case, I think you should go with your first option - don't write her anything, let her do the chasing, if any, and take it from there, but step back and look at the bigger picture here that I described above.

 

[RangerMIke]

Don't let women know that thier actions affect you. A woman flakes or cancels on you just tell her okay and move on. Put her out of your mind and move on the better women.

 

[SgtSplacker]

Sometimes I feel like some relationships will just never work. Just her living two hours away means one of you will have to drive two hours just to see the other one. If it's the dude that drives it just makes you look needy, like you don't have any better options. To a pretty girl it's critical to look like you have options in order to defeat the hypergamy hamster wheel.

You are going to drive all that time just to spend some time with her. She's going to think you want something because you drove so far. She might feel a little obligated to sleep with you and that will turn her right off and sour the whole night. You will feel jaded driving the whole way thinking about something you are not going to get. You can try to pretend you are really not interested in sex thus making her think something is wrong with you, lol. If it's her driving, she is going to start feeling like she is not appreciated or something.

The only way to win this game is to already pass the "sex barrier" then it's understandable you are driving so far to be with a person you feel comfortable sleeping with. Anything else and you are placing yourself in a bad spot.

 

[captain55]

Sometimes I feel like some relationships will just never work. Just her living two hours away means one of you will have to drive two hours just to see the other one. If it's the dude that drives it just makes you look needy, like you don't have any better options. To a pretty girl it's critical to look like you have options in order to defeat the hypergamy hamster wheel.

You are going to drive all that time just to spend some time with her. She's going to think you want something because you drove so far. She might feel a little obligated to sleep with you and that will turn her right off and sour the whole night. You will feel jaded driving the whole way thinking about something you are not going to get. You can try to pretend you are really not interested in sex thus making her think something is wrong with you, lol. If it's her driving, she is going to start feeling like she is not appreciated or something.

The only way to win this game is to already pass the "sex barrier" then it's understandable you are driving so far to be with a person you feel comfortable sleeping with. Anything else and you are placing yourself in a bad spot.

.
Well yesterday she was getting cold feet about having me over so she's like are you ok with having dinner and just seeing where it goes? She said all this via text before the date. Sure enough the date went well we started making out and she invited Me back to her house which to be honest I was not expecting. She let me sleep with her but didn't let me bang her or get physical other than making out. . We just made out...her parents are out of town until saturday night I believe. How would you approach this from here? I think asking to go see her on a saturday night will make me look desperate

 

[Between_The_Lines]

How would you approach this from here? I think asking to go see her on a saturday night will make me look desperate

You're not looking at this as a transaction - as you should - but as a goal that must be attained at any cost. This is how enormous, splendid castles of oneitis are built. You're concerned with not appearing desperate, but everything you've told us points in the direction of you actually being desperate. This chick is playing you like a fiddle if you ask me. Not only did she get you to drive two hours to see her, but she got you to sleep in her bed while also getting you to behave yourself, so she gets her dose of validation, and you get??? A few makeouts, zero gas money, and one set of blueballs. She's grooming you to be her sweet little beta, and you are??? ...obliging. I'm betting you don't want to cut your losses here either because you've gotten this far and you just know in your heart of hearts that you are almost there...

Don't you think it's time that she steps up and gives you a little something more to work with? I think anything outside of having her come see you or walking away from this one altogether not "looks", but is desperate.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

Bump

 

[captain55]

You left out the part where you were not going to text her....then ended up meeting her.

Tell us how it developed.

Well like I said she blew me off wednesday night and I was pretty bummed out about it. I think she figured I was too young for her and or I was just trying to bang her.

So I pulled the hail marry "You can say you felt the same connection with another guy as you felt with me that time you kissed me?"

her "no probably not"


at this point I decided not to text her but she hit me up the next morning.
"What's that supposed to mean?"

I still didn't respond but she texted me a "?" text four hours later. So I said

me "It means Maybe Im the right choice for you. I told you that you'd never find another guy like me Just go with your heart thats the best advice I can give you "

About an hour later..

her "Ok lets give it a try. only way to find out"

 

[captain55]

This dude FVCKING nailed it. On the head. You have gone from not caring if you go, and suspecting she is an NPD..............to panting at her feet.


Get ahold of yourself Captain.

I wouldn't go over to see her again - it is her turn now.

And don't forget, we have the two hour drive, how convenient is it to date someone from 2 hours away?

My GF lives 1 hour away, and THAT is tough enough. In fact, I won't likely do it ever again.

Keep us posted.

I texted her when I got home, told her it was a brutal drive but Im glad I came. She just texted me saying she had a great time and is alot more comfortable with me now that she hung out with me more, and hopes to see me soon but I did not respond back to that text.

Her parents come back in town Sunday, I just spent the night last night so I dont know if she'll hit me up to come over tomorrow. I think she might, possibly just to test how thirsty I am.

Any predictions

 

[captain55]

This dude FVCKING nailed it. On the head. You have gone from not caring if you go, and suspecting she is an NPD..............to panting at her feet.


Get ahold of yourself Captain.

I wouldn't go over to see her again - it is her turn now.

And don't forget, we have the two hour drive, how convenient is it to date someone from 2 hours away?

My GF lives 1 hour away, and THAT is tough enough. In fact, I won't likely do it ever again.

Keep us posted.

double post

 

[captain55]

You're not looking at this as a transaction - as you should - but as a goal that must be attained at any cost. This is how enormous, splendid castles of oneitis are built. You're concerned with not appearing desperate, but everything you've told us points in the direction of you actually being desperate. This chick is playing you like a fiddle if you ask me. Not only did she get you to drive two hours to see her, but she got you to sleep in her bed while also getting you to behave yourself, so she gets her dose of validation, and you get??? A few makeouts, zero gas money, and one set of blueballs. She's grooming you to be her sweet little beta, and you are??? ...obliging. I'm betting you don't want to cut your losses here either because you've gotten this far and you just know in your heart of hearts that you are almost there...

Don't you think it's time that she steps up and gives you a little something more to work with? I think anything outside of having her come see you or walking away from this one altogether not "looks", but is desperate.

I agree with what your saying, if you look at it that way it is beta as **** but I don't think she has any intentions of making me her beta. This chick legitimately has some things about her Ive never seen before in a woman.....she was so nervous about meeting me up before the date yesterday I think she almost had a panic attack. I had to practically talk her into getting out of the car in the parking lot over the phone to meet me.

Two hours Prior to the date I could tell she started getting cold feet again and shes like do you wanna come tomorrow? I told her absolutely not. Finally calmed her down over the phone. . Then thirty minutes later she goes and draws a picture with my name in bubble letters and texts it to me and says I cant wait to see you.

Maybe she's been raped in the past that's why she's so skiddish? Who knows ..I know she used to club alot in her younger days. I really have no clue what Im dealing with but I do like her Im not gonna lie. Shes smoking hot and fun to be around, Ive never liked a chick this much before IVe had sex with her.

 

[captain55]

Current gf is on the right. She lives an easy twenty minutes from me and I blew her off last night to drive two hours to see a chick I wasn't even going to bang lol. Should tell you how bad I want this girl.
http://i.imgur.com/IUXwDxx.gif

Dont think Ive felt this way about a chick since the beginning of 2014. Still early but I feel like it might be the girl for me.

 

[pyros]

I dont understand anything here.

SHE LIVES TWO HOURS AWAY. Even if you get to bang her it is gonna cost you A LOT in gas. wtf?

I get the feeling that now it is like a challenge for you (to bang that hot body which is unsure about you) but I would quit, unless you dont mind spending A LOT OF TIME driving, and A LOT OF GAS.

If you keep manipulating her with those lovely dovey comments you make (I am special, our connection...blah blah) you may end up confusing her to the max, and you may get the lay lol.

But as I said, I wouldnt because SHE LIVES TO DAMN FAR AWAY. Unless you have a jet of course...

 

[devilkingx2]

Current gf is on the right. She lives an easy twenty minutes from me and I blew her off last night to drive two hours to see a chick I wasn't even going to bang lol. Should tell you how bad I want this girl.
http://i.imgur.com/IUXwDxx.gif

Dont think Ive felt this way about a chick since the beginning of 2014. Still early but I feel like it might be the girl for me.

holy crap you're dumb lol