Was it right for me to only give her my phone number?

[KUcollegeguy]

Ok, there's this chick that I'm interested in and I have a feeling that she's interested in me as well. I see almost every Monday, and have for almost 2 years, well I finally realized that we have a lot in common, and I think she feels the same as well, well I said that we should hang out sometime, and she said "sure." She then said, "Are you going to give me your number?" I was like, yeah, sure, so I did. That was last Monday, and she hasn't called me. Could she be nervous? Or maybe she's really not that interested and she's just blowing me off. I don't know her that well. Which I don't mind, I'll still be nice to her and talk and stuff. I'm not an immature weirdo who isn't nice to a girl just because they don't want to date. I'm cool with it, it's not like she is the only girl that interests me, I'm just willing to give a date a shot to see if we are as combatable as I think. We both are communications majors, we both like music a lot, sports, etc. And she knows that I see her almost every Monday so it's not like she's planning to never see me again or something.

My friends say I should've got her number. I don't think it matters. They say that (even though they know me) a girl will hardly ever call you, you have to call them when you first initiate that you like them. They said that 1 out of 100 girls will call you if they ask for your number only. Well, I don't agree with it because I have proof by experience. I've had many girls ask me for my number and they call me back within one to two days. Well, this girl hasn't called me back for almost a full week, knowing that she'll see me again.

By the way, I'm new here, and was just looking for some advice than the norm of that my friends and family. I'm new at this. Nice to meet ya'll.

Anyway, what do you guys think is going on? I'm not concerned about it, just bored I guess, but should I be concerned? Should I just wait until Monday? If so, I won't say much about it It's not that big a deal, bust just curious to see what ya'll think.

How long is it for some of you guys that the girl finally calls you or whatever? Maybe she doesn't want to seem like I'm all there is for her or something, lol. If she wants to try to hang out or something, great, if not great, but she probably doesn't know that I think of this that way. She probably thinks I'm looking forward to hanging out, which I wouldn't mind, but she doesn't know that it's not that big a deal.

Anyway, enough rambling, lol, what do ya'll think is the deal and what should I do? What would you do?


Thanks in advance.

 

[Reach]

I've given a woman my number and she's sent me texts and we've met up since, but she was a frigid, roman catholic, indian, 23 year old virgin so I didn't get as far as I'd like. Need to build up more trust, next time I see her I'll make her face away from me, put her arms back, fall back and I'll catch her.

Anyway, when she said "What's your number?" you should've just said "What's your number?" as if you didn't even hear what she said and just taken it. Then call her when you feel like it, or if you did give her your number anyway, call from another one so she'll actually pick up.

It could be nerves, it could be lack of interest, all in all it adds up to the same result of no puss. Next time you see her just play it like nothing happened and if you get round to it, say "Hey, let me call you, what's your number?"

 

[TizZle]

Overanalyzing a bit? She would be interested she asked for your number. It just depends on how interested she is. But it is about what you want also. I believe you should have got her number and you should try to set up the date. If she flakes which i bet she won't(who knows though), then you got an idea on what you're dealing with. Women need to know your interested and I don't think you're showing enough interest right now. Ask her for her number when you see her then you call her !!!

 

[KUcollegeguy]

Thanks, guys.

And Reach, I'm not into getting some like that. I'm not that type of guy. I don't date chicks to sleep with them right off the bat or anything like that, so that isn't the deal.

Tizzle, I see your point. Maybe I should've been more aggressive. But she knows I'm interested or she wouldn't have asked for my number, she knew I was going to do something, whether it be ask for her number or vice versa. She knew.

Any more advice from anyone?

And yes, I tend to analyze a lot, I'm a communications major...lol.

 

[tmpgstx]

I find it odd that girls have asked you for your number in the past and called. They usually don't do this, but nothing wrong with that!

I think the key here is if she would have asked for your number had she been the one to mention you guys should hang out, then it would be good.

Does this girl have a BF? Because if she does, could be the very reason she got your number. She would keep it handy if she were to ever get single, but doesn't want you calling and causing complications.

 

[KUcollegeguy]

Originally posted by tmpgstx
I find it odd that girls have asked you for your number in the past and called. They usually don't do this, but nothing wrong with that!

I think the key here is if she would have asked for your number had she been the one to mention you guys should hang out, then it would be good.

Does this girl have a BF? Because if she does, could be the very reason she got your number. She would keep it handy if she were to ever get single, but doesn't want you calling and causing complications.

Yeah, then I should probably just chill and let her make the first move then. I'm thinking that. I don't want to bug her if she doesn't want to hang. Right?

 

[tmpgstx]

Yeah .. if she has a BF .. then you would be pushing her away more i think if you were persistant. She now knows that you do and would hang out with her if she should mention it to you.

In other words, she knows you're interested. She also knows that she sees you enough, whereas has a means to let you know when and if she wants to hang out getting to know you better on a person level.

If you read her body language and sense strong attraction, then just be yourself and focus on your common ground .. i.e. Communications. Look for things that you guys can conveniently do together and mention these on occassion that are both a common interest to you.

It shows you're patient, but also really want to spend time with her exploring interests together and not just out get into her pants etc. Decent girls are really sticklers about that. Imagine if you charmed her, then nailed her and ditched her! She left her BF for that, has to be solid.

 

[KUcollegeguy]

Originally posted by tmpgstx
Yeah .. if she has a BF .. then you would be pushing her away more i think if you were persistant. She now knows that you do and would hang out with her if she should mention it to you.

In other words, she knows you're interested. She also knows that she sees you enough, whereas has a means to let you know when and if she wants to hang out getting to know you better on a person level.

If you read her body language and sense strong attraction, then just be yourself and focus on your common ground .. i.e. Communications. Look for things that you guys can conveniently do together and mention these on occassion that are both a common interest to you.

It shows you're patient, but also really want to spend time with her exploring interests together and not just out get into her pants etc. Decent girls are really sticklers about that. Imagine if you charmed her, then nailed her and ditched her! She left her BF for that, has to be solid.

Yeah, I'm not out to do her and leave her. I'm not like that. That's one of the reasons how I've been pretty good with girls.

I'm just gonna play everything patient, like I meant to anyway, and the next time I see her again, let her bring up stuff, right?

 

[KUcollegeguy]

She may not be interested, but I don't think that's it.

Just to say, lets say she isn't interested.

Maybe that's why she asked me for my number, so I wouldn't call her. Hmmm. And she knows I see her practically every Monday, so she probably doesn't care to see me knowing that she blew me off. I don't mind, either, I'll still be nice to her if that is the case.

Dang girlsl, LOL. So hard to figure out. If she isn't interested, this will be kind of a first.

 

[tmpgstx]

Yeah .. some geniuness can go a long way.

Even tho she got your number, she may still drop a hint about hanging out. Women are very adept to dropping hints, and many of us guys have to be hit over the head with a board before we get it. Women know this too though, so if they like a guy, the hints will get stronger, until they feel he 'gets it', that she likes him.

That was a little of topic but feel it's important because you can also drop these little hints. She does know you're interested so dropping a hint here and there wouldn't be a bad idea. A good one would be going to lunch, but wouldn't elude to that right away.

By her asking for the number shows she's a bit reserved maybe because of her personality, her BF, or interest level. The best way is to play it safe and not to be pushy. It depends on the girl really. I known guys who went after girls with bf's, but they had more potential than their current bfs with respect to education and jobs. In these situations the girl weighs the potential, and if there isn't much passion in her current relationship, she makes the leap. These are the ones who are thinking family, marriage, good income and such.

Try to get a feel for what she's about and appeal to her interests. There may be an oppurtunity where her and the bf have broke up etc. This is when you have to act, but for now let things simmer.

 

[KUcollegeguy]

Originally posted by tmpgstx
Yeah .. some geniuness can go a long way.

Even tho she got your number, she may still drop a hint about hanging out. Women are very adept to dropping hints, and many of us guys have to be hit over the head with a board before we get it. Women know this too though, so if they like a guy, the hints will get stronger, until they feel he 'gets it', that she likes him.

That was a little of topic but feel it's important because you can also drop these little hints. She does know you're interested so dropping a hint here and there wouldn't be a bad idea. A good one would be going to lunch, but wouldn't elude to that right away.

By her asking for the number shows she's a bit reserved maybe because of her personality, her BF, or interest level. The best way is to play it safe and not to be pushy. It depends on the girl really. I known guys who went after girls with bf's, but they had more potential than their current bfs with respect to education and jobs. In these situations the girl weighs the potential, and if there isn't much passion in her current relationship, she makes the leap. These are the ones who are thinking family, marriage, good income and such.

Try to get a feel for what she's about and appeal to her interests. There may be an oppurtunity where her and the bf have broke up etc. This is when you have to act, but for now let things simmer.

I don't want her to break up with her boyfriend just to go out with me, though. I'm not like that. I hope she doesn't have a bf, but if so, that's fine, I'll go a different direction.

As far as her not being interested, like I mentioned in the previous post, do you think that is likely? I can see it.

 

[tmpgstx]

Yeah .. i think it's likely because you asked her to hang out and she replied with getting your number.

What's weird though is usually a guy will ask for the girl's number and this is how they will respond if not interested .. hell this is even in the ******** Dictionary.

This may be a new one. It protects her from flaking because if she said 'sure' and left it at that, then you'd really try and set something up, but her getting the number puts the ball in her court and you in wait and see mode.

I really think you have to go by body language here .. that and her actions are really the only tride and true way of knowing her interest.

 

[KUcollegeguy]

Originally posted by tmpgstx
Yeah .. i think it's likely because you asked her to hang out and she replied with getting your number.

What's weird though is usually a guy will ask for the girl's number and this is how they will respond if not interested .. hell this is even in the ******** Dictionary.

This may be a new one. It protects her from flaking because if she said 'sure' and left it at that, then you'd really try and set something up, but her getting the number puts the ball in her court and you in wait and see mode.

I really think you have to go by body language here .. that and her actions are really the only tride and true way of knowing her interest.

So I should play it cool and let her call me or talk to me about it the next time I see her? Should I not say anything at all about it, and let her bring something up?

 

[PRMoon]

Ugh, you should at least get her number or do a number exchange. I never like to leave things 100% up to the girl because often times they're flaky or forgetful. The only time I leave it up to a girl to call me is if A. I know she's a lock and she's way more interested in me then I am in her or B. I've contacted her a few times before already so she already knows my number.

Leaving the situation in the hands of a girl is like giving a monkey a 357 magnum, You just don't do it becauseit's just not smart.

 

[tmpgstx]

I would be friendly and smile alot. Ask her questions about her that you really want to know. I'm sure there are things you are wondering about her .. start of chatting a bit and then ask her things. This is good because it will continue to show interest on your part, but giving her the option to escalate it if she chooses.

You could mention that you're on your way to this or that .. and she may ask if it's ok to tag along.

To put it short, i would continue to show interest, but wait for more interest on her part by reading her body language etc. before asking her to do anything again. Let her bring it up, but drop a hint every now and then if you really like her alot.

 

[KUcollegeguy]

Yeah, I'll do that, tm.

And PR Moon, next time I'll do that. Exchange instead of just giving her my number, that way I'll know if she's real interested right off the bat.

 

[PRMoon]

holla at your boy.
Kansas kicks a$$

 

[KUcollegeguy]

Originally posted by PRMoon
holla at your boy.
Kansas kicks a$$

Yep. We didn't end things this year the way we'd like to in basketball. I'm still aching from that.

 

[KUcollegeguy]

If anyone wants to give me anymore advice, please do. I'll keep ya'll updated on how things transpire.

 

[Reach]

Originally posted by KUcollegeguy
Thanks, guys.

And Reach, I'm not into getting some like that. I'm not that type of guy. I don't date chicks to sleep with them right off the bat or anything like that, so that isn't the deal.

I really don't understand that comment. It fvcks me off that you're coming here asking for advice on how to have sex with a girl, and then you go and say you're not that kind of guy.

The fact is, if you've slept with her it opens the door for more even if it's a one night stand. They're psychologically more likely to go out with you in a loving way if you've slept with them then if you haven't.

Why the hell do you date girls? You've got an issue of sexual guilt if you think it's not alright for you to sleep with whichever girl you want.

I would love a relationship with someone who I loved, how the hell did you come up with the assumption I'm looking to use girls in the first place? I don't mind having sex though. I look at it like this, if you want sex and can get it fairly, why should you have a relationship with the girl afterwards when you've made no promises and you don't gel in any way except sexually? There are woman who do exactly the same thing or use sex manipulatively. I've got a clear consience.