wants a break.. but why?

[the_great_gaia]

you want her and she wants you. she's very insecure and you play too many games, especially to be 25. Maybe you're insecure too. I don't even see why you even posted, it's not like you're having a major problem or meltdown like the rest of us. Look, if you keep screwing this girl's feelings around because of your pride, she's gonna stop fvcking with you, then you'll be the one acting like her while she's out being stuff like a turkey on Thanksgiving Day.

 

[Climax]

oh...... ok.... well in THAT case...

Well... if this girl IS being genuine with her WORDS, then maybe you should give it another go... Because IF this girl is being genuine, then what she is looking for is reassurance from YOU that you DO love her and that u ARE ready to move on with the relationshop and that she DOESNT have anything to worry about because u dont WANT anyone else BUT her! most girls NEED to hear that on a constant basis from a guy, because if they dont hear it, they tend to get doughts and get paranoid, like your chick is doing... So tell her that there is no need to break up or take a break, tell her that u LOVE her and that she must stop jumping to conclusions and she must believe you when u tell her that you love her, and ONLY her! Hug her, get close to her, take her out somewhere, do something special togeather, SHOW her that u DO love her... because like you should know.. ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS.... and the same applies for your chick... i mean.... does she SHOW u that she loves you? ( IN REAL LIFE, I''m not talking about over text etc) .. if so.. what does she say/DO to prove to you that she really DOES love you and isnt ALL-TALK?!?

otherwise... i guess thats what i would do in your situation.... i hope this helped u out abit...


Laterz...

 

[memphis12]

it did help mate, cheers, she shows me that she loves me by pickin me up every night from work, as in she travels 30 miles back from work, goes and gets dressed, waits hour till i finish then picks me up, she wants to cuddle, kiss and touch me all the time, the other day, she drove down at 2 in morning to see me, cos i had been out for first time in ages wiv mates, anyway she then wanted to drive me to hers so we could see each other durin day, she then drove me all the way back to mine, then drove all the way home to get ready to go out, she then went out wiv her mates, and ended up gettin chatted up, but told them she was engaged to me, they happened to be from where i live and thats why i know this, she then came back from night out 2 and a half hours early to see me. she tells me all the time how much she loves me, she makes me breakfast in bed, she leaves lovely little messages on my phone while im sleepin to let me know she's thinkin about me, she said the other day it was properly over, yet last night she said she didnt know, i agree she needs reasurance because she would tell me all this, but i would rarely let her know how i felt! so in her eyes she made all the effort and not me, if we did have argument it would be her that txt or rang first, and i would just sit and wait, i think if i leave it for week then she might come around and realise i can change and that i do love her and do want to move forward, and for the lad who said i shouldnt be postin on her because im not as upset as the rest of you's... whats that all about!? ive never felt like this ever, i havent eaten since last thur hardly, i cant sleep, im total depressed! im finidng it hard to interact wiv my kid because she was so nice with him, and it makes me feel sad that he might never see her again, makes me sad just writing about it, so please dont think im not upset.

 

[stalluproar]

Quote: Well this is the thing, i met my girlfriend about 5 months ago, she soon fell in love with me, drove to see me all the time, only 15 mins away, but was always worried that she wasnt pretty enogh for me, i would tell her she was pretty every day and tell her that i loved her

Not even a complete sentence and I can already tell you why she wants a break. There is no challenge, no spark anymore when you keep telling her you love her and say she is pretty. You have turned into a predictable wuss in my opinion. If you do this periodically (random) you will bring the excitement back.

 

[Wyldfire]

Sorry...but this girl seems desperate to either live with or marry someone. She is grasping at anyone to tie down. Her low self esteem and thinking every girl is after you is going to turn into mad, crazy and irrational jealousy. She is going to show herself to be possessive, controlling, insanely jealous and most likely bug-sheeit crazy. But hey, keep eating up that attention while you enjoy it. Eventually it's going to drive you up the wall and suck the life right out of ya.

 

[Climax]

Originally posted by Wyldfire
Sorry...but this girl seems desperate to either live with or marry someone. She is grasping at anyone to tie down. Her low self esteem and thinking every girl is after you is going to turn into mad, crazy and irrational jealousy. She is going to show herself to be possessive, controlling, insanely jealous and most likely bug-sheeit crazy. But hey, keep eating up that attention while you enjoy it. Eventually it's going to drive you up the wall and suck the life right out of ya.

I dont fully agree with this... I think that with the right amount of brainwashing (convincing her that he loves ONLY her and SHOWING that to her) she will "calm down" and realise that what he is saying is true.... every woman that i have come across acts in a similar way... they are ALWAYS paranoid that the guy is cheating on her, or that the guy likes someone else, or that the guy will be tempted to be with another girl, and a whole lot of other bullsh!t.... but A guy needs to DRILL it into a girls head that all her doughts and further bullsh!t excuses to moan and complain and worry are all for nothing, because he does lov her and ONLY her! NEXT'ing this chick wont help as much as it might seem to, because he wil find another girl, and i GARANTEE you that she will have the same bullsh!t problem of being paranoid, insecure, jelous, etc. I say rather stick with this girl atm, and try "fix" her, and then if she does not stop after a while, then tell her that if she cannot trust him when he tells her that he loves her and only her, then its not gonna work, because one of the most important things in a relatrrionship is TRUST! And if she trusted him fully, she would believe him when he told her that he only loved her and would NOT ever even THINK of cheating on her...
memphis12 seems to be a mature person and seems to care alot for this girl, so by all means i would suggest that he does NOT give up on this and just see where things go... If things go wel, then great... if things dont, then at least he tried, and wont have to look back in the future and ask himself "what if" blah di blah! And YES Wyldfire, the way u explained that girl to be in your post, well.. that pretty much sums up how MOST women behave in the early stages of a relationship!


Laterz...

 

[dietzcoi]

Holy Shiat, I actually agree 100% with Wyldfire on this one!

Memphis, she sounds like trouble from YOUR description. Real trouble. We only have your side of it, of course, but you have described a drama queen and LSE ho who will destroy you. Take it from the older crowd like WF and PR_L who have been there, done that.

She and her family sound like nuts - the family would be glad to have her off their hands and on yours. Is this what you really want?

Step away from the situation, put your emotions on hold, and look this over logically. It is your only hope of coming out of this intact.

Dietzcoi

 

[arq-dj1]

ok i stoped on the 5th line

wtf dude, 5 months and u guys are almost getting engaged...


slow down, wait like 4 years then think about moving together

 

[memphis12]

Cheers again guys, the thing is i have EX who i have kid with, and i was wiv her for nearly 6 years, but never felt like this for someone! anyways she rang me yesterday, and she has rang me twice today, she told me today she loved me loads and that she missed me loads as well, she is still not eating, and still hasnt come on her periods (2 weeks), she let me know last week that sometimes she forgets to take the pill!!!!! anways ... she hates my Ex cos i have to see her for my son, im a bit tired writing this, so sorry if it dont make sence, like i said she has rang me twice, said she miss's me and loves me, she is makin the effort now, and is being much more nice, i asked for us to meet tonight, but she wants to make up wiv her mam, they have fallen out over something!!?? she said she needs this weekend to have wiv her mates, i want her to take prgnacy test, dunno why she hasnt! and want to know why she is still keepin in contact wiv me and tellin me she loves me, i think i can get her back... but im playin it a bit cooler now.

 

[Wyldfire]

Originally posted by dietzcoi
Holy Shiat, I actually agree 100% with Wyldfire on this one!

Memphis, she sounds like trouble from YOUR description. Real trouble. We only have your side of it, of course, but you have described a drama queen and LSE ho who will destroy you. Take it from the older crowd like WF and PR_L who have been there, done that.

She and her family sound like nuts - the family would be glad to have her off their hands and on yours. Is this what you really want?

Step away from the situation, put your emotions on hold, and look this over logically. It is your only hope of coming out of this intact.

Dietzcoi

I'm actually far, far wiser than most here give me credit for being. Although I tend to like to give people the benefit of the doubt and am not in favor of "nexting over nothing", when I see an obviously BAD situation I will call it what it is very vocally.

memphis is not going to listen to what you or I say. He is thinking that the very behavior he should be worried about is just her really, really loving him. He's going to be sucked in and ultimately chewed up and spit out. Of course he THINKS he's in love with this girl. Feeling "in love" is all about how you feel about yourself when you're with the other person and has nothing whatsoever to do with how you actually feel about them. All the neediness and attention this girl is displaying makes him feel like superman, an master loverboy who wowed this girl into falling crazy in love with him. What he fails to see is that the girl is just crazy, and love has nothing to do with it. Unfortunately, he probably won't realize just what he's getting himself into until he looks at her one day and realizes he married Glen Close's character in Fatal Attraction. Poor sucker...

 

[Wyldfire]

Originally posted by memphis12
Cheers again guys, the thing is i have EX who i have kid with, and i was wiv her for nearly 6 years, but never felt like this for someone! anyways she rang me yesterday, and she has rang me twice today, she told me today she loved me loads and that she missed me loads as well, she is still not eating, and still hasnt come on her periods (2 weeks), she let me know last week that sometimes she forgets to take the pill!!!!! anways ... she hates my Ex cos i have to see her for my son, im a bit tired writing this, so sorry if it dont make sence, like i said she has rang me twice, said she miss's me and loves me, she is makin the effort now, and is being much more nice, i asked for us to meet tonight, but she wants to make up wiv her mam, they have fallen out over something!!?? she said she needs this weekend to have wiv her mates, i want her to take prgnacy test, dunno why she hasnt! and want to know why she is still keepin in contact wiv me and tellin me she loves me, i think i can get her back... but im playin it a bit cooler now.

memphis...I want so badly to slap you upside the head to knock some sense in you before it's too late. THIS WOMAN IS TRYING TO F*CKING TRAP YOU INTO MARRYING HER!

She is NOT "in love with you"...she is in love with the idea of getting married and "living happily ever after". She has now obviously intentionally tried to get pregnant to trap your arse. My GOD, how dumb can you be? Wake up and smell the coffee for the love of Christ!

This has got to be THE single most pathetic display of foolishness I have yet to see take place on this forum.

Smarten up! GET AWAY FROM THIS GIRL FAST!

 

[memphis12]

Well its lookin like im goin to finish it now, my sister thinks that she has been on her period tie week and that is why she is not wantin to see me, and now she's sayin she wants to see me after this weekend .... when she will be back off, then sayin she is pregnant or something, and then lettin me get her actually pregnant, my mam is worried that all she is tryin to do is trick me into marriage! i have never noticed little signs till now, like after month she said that if she fell pregnant would i leave her, i have made a drawer up for u for u to keep stuff here, and for when u move in,.. also just after month... she didnt like me bein happy because she felt if i was happy i wasn't happy for the rite reasons, like shoppin for food for "our" house, so little things are startin to creep up, and although i doubt anyone will love me this much, i think it might be best if i leave it now, in case she trys this trick again 6 months down the road.

 

[Wyldfire]

Listen to your sister and your mother...they know what they're talking about. That girl is bad freaking news...END IT NOW!

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

Originally posted by PuertoRican_Lover
Ask yourself, "What girl at 20 years of age wants to move-in with every guy she meets and if he doesn't move-in with her she leaves?" Do you think this is a bit slutty and desperate?

She is running away from something and thinks that marrying a dude will solve her problems!! Be careful and do not even think about marriage until you know her well. Find out what she is running away from - she has mental/emotional problems!!

Listen to PR_L - you are heading for destruction!!!

 

[memphis12]

well we both went out on saturday, she phoned me on sunday morning and asked if i had done anything with any lass's. i told her that she had finished with me and that it was none of her business, we talked and we both decided i should go over, as soon as i went in she was wantin to cuddle me and kiss me and had said she left hour early from her mates cos she couldnt enjoy herself, i could tell she wanted back together, but she said if we got back together she thinks i would take piss out of her, and ppl would think she was stupid and that i would go behind her back or leave her, anyways we ened up sleepin together, and then afterwards she tells me she miss's me so much and loves me still so much and thinks finishin wiv me could be biggest mistake of her life, she also said that when i pulled her the first night we met that she thought i was playin "grab a minger" i assured her i wasnt, she also thinks i might have been behind her back, which i havent! so she asks me to walk to her mates house and get car wiv her, so i do, and then she asks me to go shoppin wiv her, cuddlin me in the shop and holdin my hand, and then at end tells me she loves me and that she will ring me later, but then later never came ......... so i txt her and she has this interview on tuesday for permanent job and she had already said in morning that she needed to practice interview wiv her mam, cos she knacked up last one, i know she really needs it cos she had mortgage and everything, but im sure she could have seen me for an hour last night, i told her it was over and i needed this week to be a fresh week to get on wiv my life, i dunno whats goin on, i havent spoken to her since....?

 

[Wyldfire]

You'll never learn...

 

[WaterTiger]

You don't know what's going on? WTF!!!!

We've been telling you what's been going on! This nutty chick is trying to trap you in a marriage! You just mentioned she has a mortgage and is looking for a permanent job. What's she been doing for money up til now? Who's been paying her mortgage?

This girl doesn't love you...she doesn't understand what the word means. What she loves is the idea of being married to a guy that will take care of her & her bills. Do not contact this girl ever again. Do not return any contact from her.

She is a mental case! Stay away from her!

 

[memphis12]

ok, i know what you's are saying, and if she was after someone to just have for money and security, she would have stayed with her X who was on more than double my wage (she also gets more money than me) and he could drive and wanted to marry her, thats what i dont understand... she wouldnt have finished him, if that was the case i dont think.

 

[memphis12]

oh and her mam owns the house, and is payin the morgage for her... so she doesnt have to worry about that.. and if we moved in together she would have the same money because her mam would then charge us rent, and she knows that i have son to pay for and support... whats gettin to me also is if she wants al this why isnt she gettin in contact with me...

 

[Wyldfire]

I don't think it's money she's after. How do you know her ex didn't dump her? I think she is just emotionally desperate to land a husband and maybe she wants a baby. It does sound like she's trying to get pregnant.

Whatever the case...this woman's behavior shows her to be a BAD RISK with SIGNIFICANT PROBLEMS.