Alright so this is a bit of a taboo topic around the SS forums, but there has to be a way to pull it off.
I want my ex back. Yeah yeah, I know my energy is better spent elsewhere. Attracting new women, etc. But this was supposed to be my wife and I can’t shake this feeling.
Spaz already gave me some good advice. Mostly to just improve myself and wait it out. Which I’m working on currently.
Background info:
-we were together (no break ups) for almost 6 years
-I maintained frame the entire time
-I’m now 31 she’s now 27. I taught her everything she knows.
-I was focused too much on my business and took her for granted for too long.
-I don’t want kids, she doesn’t either
-did a lot of AFC **** post break up. Pleaded, asked for another chance. Wrote a letter. Spoke to her parents, etc. Yes I know I should be slapped. I was devastated and not in my right mind at the time.
-I’m blocked on her phone (no I didn’t go psycho on her. I didn’t blow her phone up or anything like that. I think she did this as a coping mechanism).
-she’s a 10 physically. Not materialistic. Always supportive. Her own career. Great girl. The list goes on. Everything I’ve ever wanted in a girl. She actually helped me build my business up. I was a bartender at nightclubs when we met.
-she wanted marriage. I’d always tip toe or argue my way around the subject. Just due to immaturity on my part. Didn’t realize how old we were getting.
-friends and family got in her ear unbeknownst to me.
-we don’t share the same social circles. The only ins I have are her mom, dad, and one friend. Or showing up at one of her jobs (which I have not done, nor do I think I should do).
-it has been 5 months since the break up. Last contact was 2 months ago in late February and early March.
-I treated her like **** for a while. Mostly neglect. NOT abuse or anything like that. I didn’t mean to be the way that I was, I was just under a lot of stress.
-this is the girl I want to spend my life with.
-my expectations of her were too high. Now that I’ve come across Rollo’s work I can see what happened. I expected something that women aren’t capable of giving.
If there’s any expert at all that could help me with this, I’d appreciate it. Again, i got some pretty good advice from Spaz but it was mostly just to read the entire DJ bible (which I did), and to just make my life awesome and wait for her.
She’s never been single for very long. She’s gorgeous. I was her 4th. Met her when she was 21.
Any help would be greatly appreciated. I’ve solved a lot of problems that seemed impossible to overcome in my life before, but this is by far the most complex since the variable here is another human being.
-Al