Virging and Inexperienced guys - you are all messed up in the head!!

[AFC Savior]

I myself have been a virgin, as have all other don juans who are currently very good with women, and I have observed over the last few months exactly what every virgin's and inexperienced guy's problem is!

you aim too high

YOU AIM TOO HIGH


I do not care how great of a person you are, or how good looking you are, or how rich you are......the fact that you are a virgin/inexperienced means that you do not have the #1 thing that every hot woman wants - SEXUALITY. You can't just HAVE IT if you have never been exposed to it!!

Women know this, especially the very good looking ones, and automatically, you, the virgin/inexperienced guy appear to be a 3/10 or a 4/10 or something like that.......and then you complain on sosuave why that girl flaked on you or why she gave you shyt.......its beause shes an 8 and you are a 4

you may thing you are an 8 but you are really at the bottom of the pile when it comes to guys, BECAUSE YOU ARE INEXPERIENCED SEXUALLY

Your mistake is aiming too high and trying to go for the really cute hot gorgeous desirable girls - you CANNOT GET THEM if you yourself are useless!!!


Yea, that was me in high school........always wanted the cutest girls, asked them out, talked to them and ljbf'ed with them when they said no to going out, and i remained a virgin till college - and then I started getting girls when I realized that I myself am nothing special...nothing special YET

that's right guys, I was obviously a chump, a 3/10 who had no experience with girls.....so why the hell would some HB8 or HB9 ever want me when she could have a guy that could really satisfy her cuz he knew what he was doing?? MY POINT EXACTLY

the first few girls i went on dates with and had sex with and all that, in about a 1 year span......i'd say 15 outta 20 of them were an HB5 or lower. I did it to get experience, to crawl before i walked, and yes i did luck out on some really cute girlfriends (5 outta 20 or so) and of course, after a while, i ended up not knowing how to handle them, and they dumped me

YOU CANT AIM HIGH WHEN YOU YOURSELF ARE LOW

if you have no sexual experience, you will only snap out of your funk if you date girls that are interested in you......it may just be that hb4 or hb5 whos a freak in the bed or a really nice girl, leave your ego at the door, your EGO WILL KILL YOU, it will tell you that you are a shame of a man just because you are not with an HB10, and the fact is, that is total bull****!


Currently, I have been with 83 girls, and had around 10-15 girls fall in love with me, and in the last 2 years, thanks to all my experience already, I basically CONTROL girls and their emotions, and **** them whenever I want, its seriously easy and repetitious for me now, and TO GET TO THIS POINT, you need to start somewhere, and tell your ego to shut the hell up!!!

YOU are a 4, start out with some less than average girl, **** her, bust a nut, move on, move up, you will know better how to make a girl ***...........then move up to hotter girls, and just keep at it. You wont be able to get anywhere unless you start somewhere

YOU CANT AIM TOO HIGH WHEN YOU YOURSELF ARE TOO LOW

 

[Master Bates]

More generalizations. meh.

 

[Monaco]

This is pretty much complete nonsense, I don't even know where to begin... Well, at least you're happy.

 

[I.A.F.Y.B.]

There is nothing wrong with aiming to high. You always want to aim high in your goals. This post seems to be like your lowering people's self-esteem. But, I will agree that most virgins/inexperienced guys don't use their sexuality and need to learn to use it!

 

[LostAndConfused]

You make a really good point but it seems VERY counter-intuitive. Girls want guys with confidence yet putting yourself in the mindset that you are low will screw you over with the even average or bad looking chicks. And besides, although I haven't had sex, I do sexual things with women. For example, I've grabbed my friend's girlfriend's hips and had her grind on me when there was no music playing while we were at a mall.

I mean I've got some REALLY confident friends who don't know how to speak to girls very well, but some of their FIRST girlfriends were HB7s, easy.

:EDIT: What I'm trying to say is that you can still be in touch with your sexuality and do sexual acts, even if you are still virgin and inexperienced.

 

[ready123]

he's just emphasizing being realistic, even though he's generalizing. everybody on this board focuses on the chase but once you get that far you wanna learn how to be good in bed. cause honestly most guys, including a lot of players, have no clue what to do in bed to keep the girl coming back. being one of the few guys who knows what to do gives you sexual confidence, which turns into a positive feedback loop. eventually you know how to control a physical escalation and give the girl something to brag about to her friends if she wants to

i say don't sleep with a girl you aren't attracted to, but you're gonna have a hard time sleeping with the 10's when you can't even get the 6's and 7's. sex is fun anyway, the release clears your head and puts everything in perspective

 

[Microfiltered]

Besides leaving your ego at the door and realizing you’re a big loser just like everyone else (at the time of course), do you have any tips for fvcking fat and ugly girls? Like what exactly are you telling yourself and how do you get yourself aroused? Would you consider yourself a good actor? How long did it take before animal mode kicked in and you could just go with it?

 

[yepyepyep]

The problem with less attractive girls is that they aren't necessarily any nicer then the better looking ones are. Basically they're all the same. If super-ugly girls think that you're only going for them cause you can't get anything better then they'll reject you just as fast or faster then the 10 will.

 

[Maxtro]

Very interesting thread. For me at this time it is all true. Somehow I have manged to become 26 years old without ever having a girlfriend, having sex with real girls (not pros or AFF crap) or even dating. Because of my complete lack of experience with women I have no idea how to act around them. I have no sexual energy or sexuality. I don't know how to flirt with them. All I can do is talk to them in a gender neutral way. Meaning it doesn't matter what gender she is or I am. And unfortunately I keep getting older but I don't have any experience to match my age. I really do not want to be 30 and never had a girlfriend.

Until recently I used to be very shy and simply not talk to girls. It took me a long time till I was able to start conversations with girls. But I know that I am missing what it takes to attract women. As long as I don't have that then I will never get what I want. Knowing this it really hurts me and destroys any confidence I have.

I also keep making the same mistakes in wanting girls that I am attracted to. Honestly I have never been LJBF'd by a woman simply because I've never took the risk, I knew that I never had a chance so I spared myself the humiliation.

There is a girl that I am interested in. I talk to her everyday in class and she's nice to me, which is a big deal to me, also she is absolutely gorgeous. Anyways in class, the topic was on our upcoming speeches that are due in a couple of weeks. I suggested to her that we should get together and work on our stuff and help each other with presenting. Then she said I could do it with my parents.... I immediately said "bye" to her and left instead of walking with her to the parking lot. I knew that if she wasn't even willing to meet as classmates and do something that would mutually benefit us in class, it meant that she has no interest in me at all. Deep down I know that if I was more of a man and talked and acted around her differently I would have a chance. But as I am now, I don't have a snowballs chance in hell.

I don't like the idea of lowering my standards. I did that a few years ago. I "dated" a fat ugly girl for about two weeks. We almost had sex but she ended it with me before we could get that far. She had mental issues of her own and I simply wasn't attracted to her. In fact I would have been embarrassed to have her meet my family. I just don't want to get with a girl that I can't be proud of. But maybe I should just settle and just have sex with them to say that I got laid.

But honestly how can I even get a fat / ugly girl if I can't attract anybody?

 

[Ratisson]

I think you got the right kind of mindset about this. However i dont think its sexuality that the girl sees that your lacking. I think she sees that you lack confidence and that's what turns her off, not the skills that you have in the bedroom.

 

[Luke Skywalker]

Very interesting thread. For me at this time it is all true. Somehow I have manged to become 26 years old without ever having a girlfriend, having sex with real girls (not pros or AFF crap) or even dating.

Well, if someone was willing to have sex with you for free, even from AFF, then doesn't that mean someone was attracted to you at some level, or do you feel it was a pity-lay or something else?

But honestly how can I even get a fat / ugly girl if I can't attract anybody?

But a fat/ugly girl wouldn't count like a real girl anyway - I mean it's reacting to the same desperation as much as a pro or AFF crap. It's going after certain types of people because you don't want to starve sexually because normal girls are blowing you off or failing you left, right and centre. This is why I dont understand the OP's advice because

a) you cant go after someone you are not attracted to, they pick up you are attracted to someone else and will start acting up (happened to me this year).

b) you are not going to get the confidence of getting laid with some hot babe or by really naturally attracting someone - after all, all you did was lower your standard, but in your eyes, you are still not good enough to attract the girl you really want.

I was there. I could have meet people from AFF last year, but as my dad said, it was AFF crap in his own words and I wouldn't be accomlishing anything, sure, I may lose my virginity, but wouldn't have gained any confidence from it. Same thing with a pro.

However, I usually keep this in the back-burner if I have really put in some effort and gotten nothing but bad results, and I have to learn a lesson, so it's used to keep a sence that you could get some form of sex if you need to -- but the question I've asked myself, if it's not sex from normal girls that's attracted to normal guys and wants a relationship with them, then it's possible it's not a masculinely validating experience.

This leads me to question whether being inexperienced/virgin or just lowering standards is really the issue here -- maybe it's something else.

*************

Maxtro - if I see you become a DJ on here and be successful, then I'll believe I too can be successful with women, because I identify 100% with your situation.

 

[Fuglydude]

Interesting thread...

I'm by no means that experienced...but I have been with around 15 women in my time. I'm now happily committed in a relationship. This is my first real LTR at age 25. As AFCsavior said, I think sexuality and sexual confidence is key when it comes to attracting hotter women. Sexual confidence comes from practice. To me sex is used to fulfill a physical drive. Its like eating. You do it because it feels good, and it propagates the species!

I think one of the reasons inexperienced guys have issues hooking up, etc is because they think sex is something magical, etc, when in reality its basically like a workout...yes it feels really good. I think being comfortable with the woman you're with is extremely important. I've really opened up and uncaged by sexuality with my gf because we're very comfortable with each other...

I've been with several women that I'd consider "under my league", because it was really easy to get with them. With these women, I don't really care about pleasing them and/or about how they judge me. They're lucky enough to get to be initimate with me in the first place..and to be quite fair, these women will work extra hard to please you. They'll do lotsa really filthy stuff...its great.

AFCSavior has a definite point, although it is quite counterintuitive! good post.

 

[Maxtro]

Well, if someone was willing to have sex with you for free, even from AFF, then doesn't that mean someone was attracted to you at some level, or do you feel it was a pity-lay or something else?

The non-pro sexual encounters I had were threesomes with a couple in their 40's. The women thought I was cute an innocent. It had nothing to do with attraction and there is no way those things can apply to girls in my age bracket.

But a fat/ugly girl wouldn't count like a real girl anyway - I mean it's reacting to the same desperation as much as a pro or AFF crap. It's going after certain types of people because you don't want to starve sexually because normal girls are blowing you off or failing you left, right and centre.

I was there. I could have meet people from AFF last year, but as my dad said, it was AFF crap in his own words and I wouldn't be accomlishing anything, sure, I may lose my virginity, but wouldn't have gained any confidence from it. Same thing with a pro.

However, I usually keep this in the back-burner if I have really put in some effort and gotten nothing but bad results, and I have to learn a lesson, so it's used to keep a sence that you could get some form of sex if you need to -- but the question I've asked myself, if it's not sex from normal girls that's attracted to normal guys and wants a relationship with them, then it's possible it's not a masculinely validating experience.

This leads me to question whether being inexperienced/virgin or just lowering standards is really the issue here -- maybe it's something else.

As sad is it sounds a fat/ugly girl wold count as a lay. If I got a fat girl it would at least meant that I got laid using my "skills." The sex with her would be on my terms. But honestly I wouldn't even bother pursuing a girl that I am not attracted to. I might be able to have sex with a fat or ugly girl but I can't imagine a relationship.

LOL you edited your post.

 

[LostAndConfused]

hm it makes me wonder, how do women know if you are innocent or not? Especially if you exude confidence....

 

[Luke Skywalker]

The non-pro sexual encounters I had were threesomes with a couple in their 40's. The women thought I was cute an innocent. It had nothing to do with attraction and there is no way those things can apply to girls in my age bracket.

But the fact is, you looked 'cute and innoscent' and that was an attraction basis for someone. People are attracted in different ways right? Like one person may interpret a portrait one way, while another may interpret a portrait another way. I'm mean, you do not have to appeal to the majority of girls here, you may get one in the odd types of girls that may also be attracted to that 'cute and innoscent' charm you have.

I mean - whatever got you a ticket to get laid was not having to pay someone money.

But I see a connection here, Maxtro, is that, we feel free to explore our sexuality on venues like AFF or with pros, because they are safe, that's what they are there to do for that purpose, yet there is a block when it comes to normal girls, and that's essentially the problems. We see normal girls as having double-standards with us, where they'll be sexual with one guy, yet have their guards up with us or humiliate us when we try something - so it's not a safe venue to be sexual or practise sexuality with normal girls in our minds, because we are not that type of guy that they are opening up to sexually.

As sad is it sounds a fat/ugly girl wold count as a lay. If I got a fat girl it would at least meant that I got laid using my "skills." The sex with her would be on my terms. But honestly I wouldn't even bother pursuing a girl that I am not attracted to. I might be able to have sex with a fat or ugly girl but I can't imagine a relationship.

That's a profound comment: The sex with her would be on my terms.
So, sex with her on her terms doesn't help you I guess.

So - in our worlds - only women from AFF and pros like to have sex and dont mind us being sexual with them, but normal girls have their guard up and like 'other' guys that are sexual and would bite our heads off if we try to be sexual with them?

 

[Luke Skywalker]

To the OP:

What do you mean being sexual? Do you mean kino? Do you mean high-risk kino? Do you mean asking women if they want to have sex with you? I just dont get what that means.

When I was a kid, I used to ask other kids if I could play with them because I was never good enough to just play with them without asking for their permission and they treated me badly and I was always some sort of outcast. In fact girls would put clothing over their hands when people had to hold hands together in early grade school so they wouldn't touch me. I was never a normal kid part of the crowd for the most part of early school until later on when I just focused on other stuff.

Somehow this has translated itself to women to the point, I just dont trust them and feel they will bite if I am sexual with them and start blowing the police whistle or something, or freaking out and feel they have a double-standard for me and other guys.

I dont think that has anything to do with experience or inexperience. Other posters on here had got experience from pros, AFF crap, or a fat girl and it was not the magic bullet. Maybe you did something else?

 

[Serialized3]

The Return of Skip2

 

[Bible_Belt]

When I was a kid, I used to ask other kids if I could play with them because I was never good enough to just play with them without asking for their permission and they treated me badly and I was always some sort of outcast.

And when you reject a girl who likes you because Mom and you hold a conference for her to decide that the girl is not a good enough Christian for you, don't you think that girl feels like you did as a kid? Not good enough? Of course she does, which is why a holier-than-thou attitude about religion is a big turn-off to women (much like domineering mothers) - no one likes to be judged, especially women.

Your attitide that a girl has to be some sort of angelic virgin of a young Mother Theresa in order for her to be good enough for you is ironically similar to the way that you say other kids treated you - not good enough to be with them.

Coincidence?

 

[amethyst]

Translated from Latin Ego is the equivalent of the "you"...

The funny thing is that in Latin Ego means "I myself" to clarify it means "the you"... So sure if you want to up yourself in order to get some experience kudos. Unlike you I cannot boast (nor do I keep a tally) of sleeping with 83 girls or that around 10 to 15 girls fall in love with me in the last two years. Yet I can say that I have kept my integrity, have far less STDs (I have none last time I checked) than you do and that I haven't slept with a woman I have found unattractive. Thing is most people have delusions that sex is this “wonderful magical experience” when sex is just sex, yes it is fun (and needed to carry on your genes) but it’s not the be all and end all.

I am just throwing my two-pence in because maybe someone reading this thread, who is feeling down on their luck, thinking of following your advice of basically prostituting themselves for experience, might read this and think twice about trying to find happiness in external factors which will lead them further down the spiral in the long run.

Just to clarify confidence is what attracts people, not a clipboard of how many people you have ****ed. I have always believed that the confidence comes from within rather than it being a fleeting mirage in the distance.

Here is some food for thought, Plato once said that “We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.”

Well I said my piece, so now I take my leave...

Love,

Amethyst

 

[Luke Skywalker]

My mom has been influencing who I am seeing and I am getting less experience because of that. Point conceded.