virgin girl and her sister

[flyingphoenix]

Hi everyone.

Let me first shortly introduce myself. I'm 27 years old and I'm from Eastern Europe. MIght be good to mention since reading rooshv blog. I have been in community for years now, I read a lot but not applied because i was scared of rejection. I worked on inner game and I'm now much more confident and socially aware than before. I have still a long road ahead though.

Anyway, I have been seeing this girl now for 3 months. Usually twice or only once a week as she is very busy and I'm too now. She hit on me and I went along with it because it wasn't much work and I had no other girl. As it went along i became the one who always asking when we're going to see each other again. I have been acting like a boyfriend.

She is a nerdy girl. I don't find her very attractive but it's not so much about her physical looks but the way she dresses and her haircut. She could look much better with some small changes. Easiest to describe would be that she dresses conservatively. Wearing clothes that make her uglier than enhancing her look. That bothers me. As a side question: Can I make her change her style and how would I do that?

She is in mid twenties and a virgin. Well, I'm too so I didn't regarded that as bad. Also one of the reasons I went along because I want to get more experience with girls even though I don't see them as hottest.

On the other hand she is a sweet person and we get along pretty well.

We watch movies together or play some social games which we both enjoy. First time when we went back to my place to watch a movie alone she started crying saying she doesn't know what she feels, that this is all new to her, that she doesn't know me enough, that she is overwhelmed because of the work she just started and the studying for the uni she has to do leaving her with very little time which made her feel bad because she couldn't meet me more frequently. Which is actually true so I was understanding and I said we don't need to hurry and just watched movie. She thanked me when she went home.

Next time at my place we were making out and some light kino and no objections. Third time long make out session but she wouldn't want to undress her sweater.

Two days ago at my place again. I teach her a new game and we play. You have to think logically when you play so that maybe was not the best choice but she wasn't eager to go to my place as she only wanted to go to her place so I said I will learn her a new game.

After that we watch a movie for a bit and I pull her lower on the bed she resist by saying she doesn't feel like it I say come on and we start making out. I unbutton her bra which she resisted a bit but again she didn't want to undress the t-shirt. I continue kissing her lips and neck and try to undress her again later and she says no again. I ask her do you trust me? "Trust you about what?" she asks and then saying I'm still half a stranger to her that she doesn't know me enough, she's not ready... Then we just watched movie for another half hour and then went to her place where we playing cards with her two sisters.

Are all virgins like that or is my lack of skill that she doesn't want to go further? Or is she somehow sexually inhibited judging by the way she dresses? And what does those bolded sayings exactly mean?

After this episode I actually lost interest in her. But here it gets more complicated. I find her few years younger sister prettier, sexier and easier to banter with. She has also done belly dancing while the first girl doesn't like to dance much which I do. Her whole family is really nice and happy. They all sing in the church choir and are very connected. I guess they all regard me as the first girl bf. My preferred outcome would be to stay friend with the first girl and get on with her sister. So in this case it's good that i haven't taken her virginity if i try to do that.

I might likely lose the chance with both girls that way. I don't want to cause any friction in their family relationship because first girl also said her sisters are her best friends. I would rather back of then cause them to get on bad terms with other. I see it unlikely that her sister would want anything with me if i just dump the first girl and she doesn't want to see me again.

So would it be possible to LJBF first girl and that she sees we are incompatible and then somehow start hitting on her sister and with them being fine with that?

I don't have much experience with relationships and i'm afraid this would be too complicated and too much drama.

I'm very busy at the monent with the uni and also broke so I can't just go picking up girls left and right. Maybe in 6 months. I also live in a small town. So I want to get best of what i have now. It does reek of scarcity mindset I know.

I had a school mate whos younger brother dated his ex-gf and he was perfectly ok with that so I guess it's possible.

Any thoughts are appreciated.

 

[Desdinova]

I've never fvcked a virgin, so I don't know what they're like when it comes to the first time.

However, I find the best way to make a woman give it up is to make her the raging sex maniac. It requires a lot of self-control, but it's worth it. Kiss her neck, bite her, rub her breasts and crotch over her clothes, but let her be the one that initiates going further. Let her be the uncontrollable horn dog.

So would it be possible to LJBF first girl and that she sees we are incompatible and then somehow start hitting on her sister and with them being fine with that?

You're better off choosing one target, especially if any of them are still living at home. However, if they're not living at home, feel free to do whatever you like. There's a good chance you could lose both of them, but there's plenty more women out there.

 

[AMDG]

Are all virgins like that

Not at all. My fiance was a virgin when she met me and I have not encountered such problems - in fact we were doing various/radical sex acts barely two months after our first meeting.

That being said, I encountered other virgins that were negociating for status ( usually marriage ) using virginity as a bargaining chip. Run away form such girls.

By all means, do the LJBF thing right now, and give us feedback how the girls reacted.

Good luck.

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

Now why would you put two people in the same room to work on a car if they know nothing about the car?

If you haven't had sex with any girl in 3 weeks.... let alone 3 months... then chances are probably that your never going to have sex with her period. There are a few exceptions but the best thing that you need to do is find an experienced girl so you can get some experience and be comfortable with yourself.

Just stop messing with that girl. You don't even think she is attractive. You need at her sister at a casual level. Once your casual you can get a feel if she would want to go to second gear. But definately stop messing with the first girl.

You need a lot of work but it's better late then never. If you have any more questions just ask.

 

[flyingphoenix]

Thanks for the replies.

I've never fvcked a virgin, so I don't know what they're like when it comes to the first time.

However, I find the best way to make a woman give it up is to make her the raging sex maniac. It requires a lot of self-control, but it's worth it. Kiss her neck, bite her, rub her breasts and crotch over her clothes, but let her be the one that initiates going further. Let her be the uncontrollable horn dog.

I was doing that but she didn't initiated further. Then I just tried to undress her several times. Might try sth. differently next time if it happens.

You're better off choosing one target, especially if any of them are still living at home. However, if they're not living at home, feel free to do whatever you like. There's a good chance you could lose both of them, but there's plenty more women out there.

They both live at home. I was there like 10 times with whole family present.

@AMDG

She haven't even brought bf-gf issue up. I don't think she would want to marry.
I think she is insecure regarding sex.
I won't contact her first. We go to the same taiji class though so we will see each other tomorrow there if she comes. I'm scared to LJBF her. Will see first how the interaction goes.

@PrettyBoyAJ

I can't get to her sister if we part on bad terms which if I just LJBF her it will probably happen.
About her attraction. It's just the clothes that bothers me. She is cute otherwise. If I could make her change her style I would be fine with her.

All of this wouldn't be much of a problem if I had lined up plenty of others girls but I don't. As already mentioned I have very little time now because of the studying and I'm also broke. Plus I'm living in a small town. It's dead even on weekends. Not much girls to approach. I would need to drive to another town and then the issue of money comes up.

 

[Desdinova]

From what I can tell, you have two things working against you...

1) You're not experienced enough to know what drives a woman crazy sexually
2) This woman doesn't seem all that interested in you.

You NEED to get out there and figure out first-hand what women like. You need to experiment with touching, kissing and how to flirt. Only practice is going to make you better with women.

 

[backbreaker]

From what I can tell, you have two things working against you...

1) You're not experienced enough to know what drives a woman crazy sexually
2) This woman doesn't seem all that interested in you.

You NEED to get out there and figure out first-hand what women like. You need to experiment with touching, kissing and how to flirt. Only practice is going to make you better with women.

'
even more you ren't going to figure out what women like by dealing with one who doesn't put out.


about what, 5 years ago I went on a date wtih a virgin.

you know what... that's another thing... women wear the "virgin" card like a swastika or something. like "hi my name is jamie oh yeah i'm a virgin" very few times does the topic of her being a virtin come up while being pressured into sex it usually comes up as a qualifying topic. I have learned that people who make sex a big deal are generally the people who aren't having sex. sex really isn't all that serious.

anyway, i wen on a date with this girl, brooke, and not, freaking, lol we went red lobster, and i hadn't even gotten to the damn cheader biscuits before it came out. Anyway, I am bantering with her and i ask her a question about when she wants to have sex and she said sommething to the akin of "It's going to take a very special man to take my V card"

I damn near choked on my apple sause (yes I still eat apple sauce, i hate salad, so i'm the grown ass man in red lobster eating apple sauce like a child).. who he fvck says "v card". that's like, jr high vocab. i still have not gotten that out of my head half a decade later.

what i am getting at is... it's not so much the sex. I mean, it is the sex make no mistake but that to me is not the biggest reasons not to deal with virgins. Most virgins, are so out of touch with reality, with what is going on, with men in general. they still have a very idealized way that they think things should be done.

brooke and i hang out in the same horse racing circles. she had just lost a lot of weight when i met her. anyway, she suckers someone else in our associated large group to date her, and within a few months, to get "in" he proposes, they get married and apparently it wasn't all it was cracked up to be because she left him already. not one perrson gave her the slightest bit of slack for leaving.

this dude, bought an engagement /wedding ring, paid for a vacation/ honeymoon, paifor a wedding, bought a new house (she bought it too but still), that's what.... let's say, 50k dollars ... to have sex ONE time.

this is the same guy in society that turns his nose at guys who paid for prostitutes.

 

[Iceberg]

I can't get to her sister if we part on bad terms which if I just LJBF her it will probably happen.

All due respect, buddy - you're not getting to the sister anyway.

First of all, you're not at a point in life where you've developed the game to pull that off. This younger sister....she's going to piss off her family, betray her sister, and cause drama in her own house for what? Some virgin dude with no game? I imagine if she wants to get laid that badly, she can choose from other men in her life.

All of this wouldn't be much of a problem if I had lined up plenty of others girls but I don't.

The lack of women in your life is no excuse for tolerating nonsense from a girl. If you want sex and she's unwilling to provide it, then you have to move on. It doesn't matter if you're leaving her for a new girl or just to pursue other goals....this girl is a waste of your time. Therefor, she provides no benefit to your life whatsoever, and in fact, she seems to be hurting your progress.

As already mentioned I have very little time now because of the studying and I'm also broke. Plus I'm living in a small town. It's dead even on weekends. Not much girls to approach. I would need to drive to another town and then the issue of money comes up.

Excuses.

 

[flyingphoenix]

@Desdinova

I agree that i need more experience. I regret not doing more approaches earlier but it is what it is now. I just recently read about spinning plates on rollo's blog. I like the idea although i felt uncomfortable at first as it is somehow wrong and unethical. Not anymore though.

It would be great if I read about that 3 months ago. When I first started going out with her she was saying that she's not kind of a girl to have ONS or just for me to have fun with her for short term. I said I'm not that kind of a guy either but lets just see how it goes, can't promise anything let's have fun. She has also never turned away when I tried to kiss her if that means anything.

I remember now what we also talked about when she was first time at my home and bursted out crying. She said at first she was very happy to see me when we first started talking after taiji classes but then she started working. I don't know if you even have that in US. During uni you have to work for 3 months in her case as a part of the curriculum. She said that turned her life around and needed to adapt. Before she had lots of time and now she comes late at home, needs to study and not getting enough sleep. I don't have any reason to not believe her. She felt really bad about it that she can't find more time with me. She places studying first because she doesn't want to make the same mistake as her father who didn't pass his last few exams at uni and didn't finish it.

Or maybe she really isn't that crazy about me.

I'm still wondering what it means when she says that she doesn't know me enough, she is not ready when i want further with her? That she is not turned on enough, doesn't trust me, thinks I will leave her or sth. else?


@backbreaker

lol at the story

When she said she was a virgin she didn't say it in a qualifying way. At least I don't remember it in a such a way.

what i am getting at is... it's not so much the sex. I mean, it is the sex make no mistake but that to me is not the biggest reasons not to deal with virgins. Most virgins, are so out of touch with reality, with what is going on, with men in general. they still have a very idealized way that they think things should be done.

I think thats very true.

@Iceberg

First of all, you're not at a point in life where you've developed the game to pull that off. This younger sister....she's going to piss off her family, betray her sister, and cause drama in her own house for what? Some virgin dude with no game? I imagine if she wants to get laid that badly, she can choose from other men in her life.

I did mention this in the first post. That's why i want to stay friend with the first girl and then later go for her sister. And in the mean time approach some other girls.

 

[AMDG]

I'm scared to LJBF her. Will see first how the interaction goes.

It's very simple actually. Just ignore her, and believe me you're wasting time on her.

 

[flyingphoenix]

She didn't come to taiji class. After further thought I decided to not go after her sister.