Don diego
Senior Don Juan
IDJ please!!!, consider what RKTek said here, pls.
Verbal Combat : How to handle hurtful remarks given by others to bring us down?
- Thread starter IntermediateDonJuaner
- Start date
Bonhomme
Master Don Juan
No, IDJ, do not try to beat him at his own game, dammit!
TA = The Attacker
IDJ = IntermediateDonJuaner
TA : So how's it going with the girl you're after?
IDJ : (Ignores, walks away)
TA (if he's smart): (Stays put, end of discussion)
TA (if he's not so smart): (follows IDJ) I asked you a question!
IDJ: (keeps ignoring and walking away)
TA : (keeps following) Answer my question!
IDJ: You have a serious problem. Now run along and grow up a bit, or your sorry ass will be thrown out of here before you know what happens.
DO NOT PLAY INTO HIS GAME. Got it?
TA = The Attacker
IDJ = IntermediateDonJuaner
TA : So how's it going with the girl you're after?
IDJ : (Ignores, walks away)
TA (if he's smart): (Stays put, end of discussion)
TA (if he's not so smart): (follows IDJ) I asked you a question!
IDJ: (keeps ignoring and walking away)
TA : (keeps following) Answer my question!
IDJ: You have a serious problem. Now run along and grow up a bit, or your sorry ass will be thrown out of here before you know what happens.
DO NOT PLAY INTO HIS GAME. Got it?
IntermediateDonJuaner
Master Don Juan
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Guys, some of you said "Don't try to beat him at his own game" . But don't you see the problem here, he never stops his nonsense and if he has a chance to start his sh|t, he will do it.
Correct, I am not good in talking smack so I come here to see what I can do to improve myself. Isn't this site is about self-improvement?
I hate this but since some of you said "Listen to what RKTEk said", I might want to consider following his advice. I have tried to show indifference but it doesn't work. He keeps on insulting me and when he is losing, he will bring his buddies along to help. DARN!
Here's a sample convo:
T.A = The Attacker
IDJ = IntermediateDonJuaner
T.A.F = The Attacker's Friends
T.A : So IDJ, what are you doing on Friday night tomorrow?
IDJ : I am out to be happy.
T.A : Going somewhere like pubs and bars again to do pickup? Why are you going there? These places are not suitable for you. You will be rejected.
T.A.F :
IDJ : T.A, I admired your skills in obscuring reality.
T.A : I am just telling you the truth. At least I dont get rejected like anyone else. The truth is out there.
IDJ : I am fascinated by the way you've given your opinion. It's way too fantastic!
T.A.F : IDJ, for your information, girls will only like guys who are winners.
IDJ : So?
T.A : Allow me to help you IDJ, I understand how you feel the last time you get rejected. I already knew it from the beginning that you're going after that girl, nothing mysterious here. And I have knew that you won't succeed.
T.A.F :
I am doing my best to give him a piece of his own medicine. But it look like he's still strong enough. Guys, are there any sites like this site which will teach verbal self defense? If yes, give them to me.
Correct, I am not good in talking smack so I come here to see what I can do to improve myself. Isn't this site is about self-improvement?
I hate this but since some of you said "Listen to what RKTEk said", I might want to consider following his advice. I have tried to show indifference but it doesn't work. He keeps on insulting me and when he is losing, he will bring his buddies along to help. DARN!
Here's a sample convo:
T.A = The Attacker
IDJ = IntermediateDonJuaner
T.A.F = The Attacker's Friends
T.A : So IDJ, what are you doing on Friday night tomorrow?
IDJ : I am out to be happy.
T.A : Going somewhere like pubs and bars again to do pickup? Why are you going there? These places are not suitable for you. You will be rejected.
T.A.F :
IDJ : T.A, I admired your skills in obscuring reality.
T.A : I am just telling you the truth. At least I dont get rejected like anyone else. The truth is out there.
IDJ : I am fascinated by the way you've given your opinion. It's way too fantastic!
T.A.F : IDJ, for your information, girls will only like guys who are winners.
IDJ : So?
T.A : Allow me to help you IDJ, I understand how you feel the last time you get rejected. I already knew it from the beginning that you're going after that girl, nothing mysterious here. And I have knew that you won't succeed.
T.A.F :
I am doing my best to give him a piece of his own medicine. But it look like he's still strong enough. Guys, are there any sites like this site which will teach verbal self defense? If yes, give them to me.
Bonhomme
Master Don Juan
I'm sure he's very glad to see his sh1t gets to you. You're being so kind to him by volunteering to be the object of his amusement.
Think of it as trying to outbox Lennox Lewis.
Think of it as trying to outbox Lennox Lewis.
IntermediateDonJuaner
Master Don Juan
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You make it sound as if there's no chance of winning him at all.
Why don't you see it as a way to moving around and beat the opponent in the game?
so.. why are you still talking to him?
You know he's gonna insult you. You know you don't need to talk to him for anything.
Be busy. Don't even let him start. You see him coming "hey, how's it going IDJ?"
"Fine, goodbye, I'm busy, not time to talk"
You know he's gonna insult you. You know you don't need to talk to him for anything.
Be busy. Don't even let him start. You see him coming "hey, how's it going IDJ?"
"Fine, goodbye, I'm busy, not time to talk"
dead_romeo
Senior Don Juan
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IDJ please read this thread immediatley. It will help you alot I think.
------------------
"Conclusions arrived at through reasoning have very little or no influence in altering the course of our lives. Hence, the countless examples of people who have the clearest convictions and yet act diametrically against them time and time again; and have as the only explanation for their behavior the idea that to err is human." Carlos Castaneda - The Fire From Within
"It is the responsibility of the strong to help the weak become strong" - Harlan Ellison
------------------
"Conclusions arrived at through reasoning have very little or no influence in altering the course of our lives. Hence, the countless examples of people who have the clearest convictions and yet act diametrically against them time and time again; and have as the only explanation for their behavior the idea that to err is human." Carlos Castaneda - The Fire From Within
"It is the responsibility of the strong to help the weak become strong" - Harlan Ellison
Chunking2399
Don Juan
Dude how hard is it to tell the guy to FvCK OFF, sometimes you have to get your point across directly and if you have been busy pu55y footing around with this guy trying to verbally attack with no success, maybe a more direct approach is needed.
I not saying to lose your cool, or to freak out but make sure this guy knows that your taking his 5h1t anymore.
The next time he comes up and starts saying anything, interrupt him saying "FVCK OFF" he'll be suprised that you got a pair balls finally. Some people don't give you respect till you show that you won't take their sh1t.
The only reason I'm telling you to take this approach is because I don't think the verbal gymnastics is your forte! Going head-to-head with this guy is not going to be in your favor, making him look like an A55 because he is trying to make fun of you will.
[This message has been edited by Chunking2399 (edited 08-01-2002).]
I not saying to lose your cool, or to freak out but make sure this guy knows that your taking his 5h1t anymore.
The next time he comes up and starts saying anything, interrupt him saying "FVCK OFF" he'll be suprised that you got a pair balls finally. Some people don't give you respect till you show that you won't take their sh1t.
The only reason I'm telling you to take this approach is because I don't think the verbal gymnastics is your forte! Going head-to-head with this guy is not going to be in your favor, making him look like an A55 because he is trying to make fun of you will.
[This message has been edited by Chunking2399 (edited 08-01-2002).]
Marquez
Don Juan
I also do not understand why you still talk to him. Tell him "I do not want to talk to you". No explanations given. If he persists on why that is so, say "Because you are an a$$hole and now piss off". If you sit, stand up in that moment. Look into his eyes. Don't laugh, be very serious.
Probably he will get angry and threaten you. Continue looking into into his eyes and visualize how you hit with full force on his throat, on his adam's apple. Visualize how you kill him with that strike. Do this visualization before you go to sleep, immerse yourself into that picture, create it with all possible details, so that it "feels" real. When you stand before him, you must be ready to kill him. This is a very clear state of mind, no anger, no fear ... without any emotions. He will feel that and leave you alone (forever).
This visualization is also good when someone is actually attacking you. Do your strike like visualized - opponent will go down since he cannot breathe anymore. But call help of course (he will get an adrenaline injection).
From my own experiences, I can say that this mindest works even with very aggressive people. Since I use it, I never had any problems. Three days ago I was at a small brewery with my sister and a good friend, and it was very crowded, so we had to sit next to some alcoholic guy and his girlfriend (?). After half an hour he started to insult the woman who was with him, then he said very loud "All wankers here!" and repeated it two times. He was older and stronger than me, but I turned to him, asked "You don't like the people?". I visualized striking his adam's apple, and I looked into his eyes. He immediately excused, and explained that he actually didn't like the beer. I listened for a minute and then I ignored him. He continued to talk with the woman in a normal tone and left about five minutes later. He also said goodbye to me in a serious but friendly way.
[This message has been edited by Marquez (edited 08-01-2002).]
Probably he will get angry and threaten you. Continue looking into into his eyes and visualize how you hit with full force on his throat, on his adam's apple. Visualize how you kill him with that strike. Do this visualization before you go to sleep, immerse yourself into that picture, create it with all possible details, so that it "feels" real. When you stand before him, you must be ready to kill him. This is a very clear state of mind, no anger, no fear ... without any emotions. He will feel that and leave you alone (forever).
This visualization is also good when someone is actually attacking you. Do your strike like visualized - opponent will go down since he cannot breathe anymore. But call help of course (he will get an adrenaline injection).
From my own experiences, I can say that this mindest works even with very aggressive people. Since I use it, I never had any problems. Three days ago I was at a small brewery with my sister and a good friend, and it was very crowded, so we had to sit next to some alcoholic guy and his girlfriend (?). After half an hour he started to insult the woman who was with him, then he said very loud "All wankers here!" and repeated it two times. He was older and stronger than me, but I turned to him, asked "You don't like the people?". I visualized striking his adam's apple, and I looked into his eyes. He immediately excused, and explained that he actually didn't like the beer. I listened for a minute and then I ignored him. He continued to talk with the woman in a normal tone and left about five minutes later. He also said goodbye to me in a serious but friendly way.
[This message has been edited by Marquez (edited 08-01-2002).]
Don diego
Senior Don Juan
IDJ:
1: bang your sister!
2: Fvuck off!
i would recommend ...
3: hey, how you doing? and just walk by...
IntermediateDonJuaner
Master Don Juan
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- Messages
- 933
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- 1
So you think I should just let him off. Taking revenge will make me feel better. Now let me show another convo which we fought in today .
T.A : IDJ, have you considered asking the girl who I recommended for you the other day?
IDJ : NO!!
T.A : Why not? She will be glad to go out with you....Furthermore, you don't have to worry that you will overspent. This girl doesnt go for money. She goes for person.
IDJ : What I do is none of your business!,ok?
T.A :
T.A.F :
IDJ :
T.A : Why are you showing your temper? I am trying to help you here. I am actually being a kind person. You should thanked me for that.
T.A.F :
You see......now, if I don't stand up for myself, he might think I am full of sh|t. All I need now is verbal lessons. Come on guys, give me lessons in verbal combat.
T.A : IDJ, have you considered asking the girl who I recommended for you the other day?
IDJ : NO!!
T.A : Why not? She will be glad to go out with you....Furthermore, you don't have to worry that you will overspent. This girl doesnt go for money. She goes for person.
IDJ : What I do is none of your business!,ok?
T.A :
T.A.F :
IDJ :
T.A : Why are you showing your temper? I am trying to help you here. I am actually being a kind person. You should thanked me for that.
T.A.F :
You see......now, if I don't stand up for myself, he might think I am full of sh|t. All I need now is verbal lessons. Come on guys, give me lessons in verbal combat.
Kane
Senior Don Juan
IDJ,
Reread my second post regarding this topic. Here is an excerpt:
I have several tactics for you to try.
First, Give me his address and I’ll kick his teeth in. He’ll be funnier with a toothy accent when he tries to talks to you. Or,
Second, Don’t play his game. I’ve dealt with his kind before. See, he will think of how to set people up and then mash them. He’ll set you up with a question and no matter how you answer it he’ll try to insult you. So take a breathe, redirect his question this can usually done by asking him back the same question. (redirection) or,
Third. Answer him with an insult. Just take a breath and think of a good insult before answering him. It’s best, I think to use his mom or girlfriend. I prefer mom myself.(insulting answer)
-------------------
In short don't play his game. His questions are all set ups!
Kane
Reread my second post regarding this topic. Here is an excerpt:
I have several tactics for you to try.
First, Give me his address and I’ll kick his teeth in. He’ll be funnier with a toothy accent when he tries to talks to you. Or,
Second, Don’t play his game. I’ve dealt with his kind before. See, he will think of how to set people up and then mash them. He’ll set you up with a question and no matter how you answer it he’ll try to insult you. So take a breathe, redirect his question this can usually done by asking him back the same question. (redirection) or,
Third. Answer him with an insult. Just take a breath and think of a good insult before answering him. It’s best, I think to use his mom or girlfriend. I prefer mom myself.(insulting answer)
-------------------
In short don't play his game. His questions are all set ups!
Kane
IntermediateDonJuaner
Master Don Juan
- Joined
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- 933
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Can you quit telling me to stop f*cking playing his game? I just want to attack him just like how he does to me. Think about it a sec. How can I let him off just like that? I want to make him the victim of his own effort to insult me. I want him to get injured emotionally as bad as I am now.
And Kane, I lived in malaysia. So no point giving you his address cause you can't kick his ass. Anyway, I prefer the guys around here to give me verbal lessons to outsmart him in this game.
Kane
Senior Don Juan
You can do that by not answering his questions directly. Answer his questions with an insult back. Every question he'll ask will be an insult. Don't let him set you up.
Example:
Bad guy: Hey IDJ, what'd you do over the weekend?
IDJ: Your girlfriend... (or your mom whatever)
Even if it's a weak insult back. Don't give him a real answer for him to attack. Even if he makes any statement. Reply back with an insult.
Bad guy: I pity you
IDJ: Blow me
Kane
Don diego
Senior Don Juan
tell us more about him.....personnal stuff....ammo
[This message has been edited by Don diego (edited 08-05-2002).]
IntermediateDonJuaner
Master Don Juan
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Don Diego, I have explained in details about him in the first page. We worked together before and all sorts of stuffs....read that one.
This guy knows how to play sh|t with me and I never seen him losing. I do not know what to do to kick his @ss verbally. By the way, the first thing I need to learn is "How not to get angry or emotional". I just seem to get angry over small insults and it shows in my attitude.
I have come across people who don't seem to be wounded by insults when I attack them verbally. They are master of indifference.... Whatever insults you throw at them, they feel no pain at all. WOW! And it shows in their attitude that they are not moved in any way. They remained so calm. I just do not know how did they do that.
Come on guys, the first thing I need to learn is to "Control the anger and even if I am angry, do your best to hide it". I need to learn this first before doing anything else. So how do we do that?
This guy knows how to play sh|t with me and I never seen him losing. I do not know what to do to kick his @ss verbally. By the way, the first thing I need to learn is "How not to get angry or emotional". I just seem to get angry over small insults and it shows in my attitude.
I have come across people who don't seem to be wounded by insults when I attack them verbally. They are master of indifference.... Whatever insults you throw at them, they feel no pain at all. WOW! And it shows in their attitude that they are not moved in any way. They remained so calm. I just do not know how did they do that.
Come on guys, the first thing I need to learn is to "Control the anger and even if I am angry, do your best to hide it". I need to learn this first before doing anything else. So how do we do that?
PlayerinTraining
Senior Don Juan
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Originally posted by IntermediateDonJuaner:
So you think I should just let him off. Taking revenge will make me feel better. Now let me show another convo which we fought in today .
T.A : IDJ, have you considered asking the girl who I recommended for you the other day?
IDJ : NO!!
A better reply-"Not really. I wouldn't want to take the only chick who likes you. "
T.A : Why not? She will be glad to go out with you....Furthermore, you don't have to worry that you will overspent. This girl doesnt go for money. She goes for person.
I'd say "Look, just because you can pick up hookers with vision problems doesn't make you some expert with women. If this woman is as good as you say she is, and goes for people with a good personality, you should date her. I'm wondering why she hangs around you for? I know, you probably pay her too. There is no way she could stand the sight of you otherwise."
You see......now, if I don't stand up for myself, he might think I am full of sh|t. All I need now is verbal lessons. Come on guys, give me lessons in verbal combat.
Look at one of my previous posts. You need to turn this around on him. Get him talking about his dating life, and then bust his balls for it. Just make stuff up. Get him on the defensive.
You have to take his question and quickly reverse it.
Some typical insults:
- His only dating experience involves hookers, young children, etc.
- He needs viagra to get it up.
- He is ugly, no personality, no life, etc.
- He dated a transvestite
- He has had homosexual experiences
- He has had sexual experiences with close family members (sisters, cousins, etc.)
Example:
TA: Have you considered asking that girl out yet?
IDJ: Why don't you ask her out if she is as great as you say she is? Dating an actual WOMAN, and not some Hooker, or little children you usually pick up, would be a step up for you.
Wait, I forgot--you only date men. I'm sorry. I'm just curious, but when you do go out with another man, do you always play the woman, or do you take turns?
The key--go on the attack. Don't answer his questions. Just make embarassing accusations about him, his manliness, etc.
So you think I should just let him off. Taking revenge will make me feel better. Now let me show another convo which we fought in today .
T.A : IDJ, have you considered asking the girl who I recommended for you the other day?
IDJ : NO!!
A better reply-"Not really. I wouldn't want to take the only chick who likes you. "
T.A : Why not? She will be glad to go out with you....Furthermore, you don't have to worry that you will overspent. This girl doesnt go for money. She goes for person.
I'd say "Look, just because you can pick up hookers with vision problems doesn't make you some expert with women. If this woman is as good as you say she is, and goes for people with a good personality, you should date her. I'm wondering why she hangs around you for? I know, you probably pay her too. There is no way she could stand the sight of you otherwise."
You see......now, if I don't stand up for myself, he might think I am full of sh|t. All I need now is verbal lessons. Come on guys, give me lessons in verbal combat.
Look at one of my previous posts. You need to turn this around on him. Get him talking about his dating life, and then bust his balls for it. Just make stuff up. Get him on the defensive.
You have to take his question and quickly reverse it.
Some typical insults:
- His only dating experience involves hookers, young children, etc.
- He needs viagra to get it up.
- He is ugly, no personality, no life, etc.
- He dated a transvestite
- He has had homosexual experiences
- He has had sexual experiences with close family members (sisters, cousins, etc.)
Example:
TA: Have you considered asking that girl out yet?
IDJ: Why don't you ask her out if she is as great as you say she is? Dating an actual WOMAN, and not some Hooker, or little children you usually pick up, would be a step up for you.
Wait, I forgot--you only date men. I'm sorry. I'm just curious, but when you do go out with another man, do you always play the woman, or do you take turns?
The key--go on the attack. Don't answer his questions. Just make embarassing accusations about him, his manliness, etc.
IntermediateDonJuaner
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 1, 2001
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- 933
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Thanks playerintraining.
But here's the rest of the convo which comes up just two days ago :
T.A : I heard you're after a new girl here.It looks like you dont like the girl I recommended. Anyway, the girl you're after is not quite bad. She never rejected anyone before.
IDJ : I am smart so I make the right choice. Things have been going on well for us. And I am skillful enough to get her.
T.A : She has dated many guys before. She never disagrees going out with guys. She is basically an easy target.
IDJ : Oh I see, how do you know so much? You've been out with her before?
T.A : I slept with her before as well.
IDJ : I heard she's a virgin.
T.A : She slept with me months ago. Everyone knows that. HAHA!
IDJ : I believed you, I believed you.
T.A : Well,do you know how to chase after girls? You seem to always failed.
IDJ :
Well, he wins the game again!. My problem is not having enough ammos to blast him. I usually have cheap shots in my arsenal. So it is not good enough to hurt him. Can any of you guys recommend me powerful insult to hurt him emotionally.?
But here's the rest of the convo which comes up just two days ago :
T.A : I heard you're after a new girl here.It looks like you dont like the girl I recommended. Anyway, the girl you're after is not quite bad. She never rejected anyone before.
IDJ : I am smart so I make the right choice. Things have been going on well for us. And I am skillful enough to get her.
T.A : She has dated many guys before. She never disagrees going out with guys. She is basically an easy target.
IDJ : Oh I see, how do you know so much? You've been out with her before?
T.A : I slept with her before as well.
IDJ : I heard she's a virgin.
T.A : She slept with me months ago. Everyone knows that. HAHA!
IDJ : I believed you, I believed you.
T.A : Well,do you know how to chase after girls? You seem to always failed.
IDJ :
Well, he wins the game again!. My problem is not having enough ammos to blast him. I usually have cheap shots in my arsenal. So it is not good enough to hurt him. Can any of you guys recommend me powerful insult to hurt him emotionally.?