DDC
New Member
Fast forward a year later, its summer again and my friends are back at it, throwing parties, tripping whenever we felt like it, and generally having a lot of fun. But something had begun changed. The trips had taken on a new effect. I was started to feel some side effects I had never felt before. After I had come down from the trip, I felt burnt for sometimes 8 hours later. My body would sometimes just start itching like I had run into some poison ivy and wouldn't subside for an hour. Sometimes I would get small panic attacks out of nowhere, even when I was relaxed and my heart would start beating really fast and I would think it could just stop at any moment and I would die. Things like that; real buzzkills. One night off of just a small amount of DXM (300mg or so) I got taste of psychosis. Everything people said seemed like it was directed against me, like I was the subject of some joke everyone knew about but me. I took off out to the park and had this intense feeling I was being watched and some CIA agent or something was going to try and assassinate me. Now I know this makes no sense to you, but in my mind it started to make perfect sense- the more I thought about it the more I believed it could be true. Soon I was hearing helicopters in the distance in an area where normally there were none. I walked past the post office and there was a group of armed guards saluting me as I walked past. I ended up sitting next to some old guy on a park bench, convinced that I was having a conversation with him through some sort of telepathic intercommunication and that was why the agents were after me! :crackup: It all seemed so real, as incredulous as it seems. Finally I got up and figured this is all too much for my drugged out mind- I'm going home to sleep it off.
I woke up a few hours feeling normal but still freaked out from the events of the morning. I went outside and noticed nothing out of the ordinary- kind of disappointed that I couldn't speak to people through telepathy, but happy I was sane (now) and scared about how insane I was earlier. It really changed my view on mind-altering drugs. I looked back at my years of tripping and realized that all it lead to. Sure it was fun, the same way skydiving is fun. While you are falling, its the greatest feeling in the world. Everything is beneath you, and you know you will land safely- theres a 99.99% chance you will at least. Until, one day, your parachute malfunctions and you crash into the ground. Below everyone. Dead. And even if you land safely, it was only fun while it lasted, it doesn't benefit you in any way.
After all of this, I still felt the urge to trip a bit more- just to see if it was a fluke, etc. Sure I didn't go insane, but I just had this uncomfortable feeling all along the 8 hour span of the trip. Not my idea of a good time. After 300 trips, the drug had lost it's magic. I swore it off, and haven't regretted it. I look back at those summers with a smile. I wish I could repeat them but at the same time, I know they will never come again- which might I add, is a good thing. No matter how good a drug is, you can never do it for the rest of your life, sooner or later it will catch up with you.
Now to end things out, I'll tell you about what the effects of DXM use over the years have been. Honestly, I still don't feel normal. My skills in speaking had dropped off the deep end, it was almost hard to hold conversations despite having a world of stories and ideas to talk about. Just finding the right word to use, common words, sometimes became an exercise in frustration. It has slowly come back, but I don't know if it will ever be quite the same. For awhile after I quit, I had dreams where I would be tripping and then I would wake from the dream and would still be in another dream, just I wouldn't know it until I woke up again and again. Finally I would wake up (for real) and I would be paralyzed for a few seconds- really scary. Never happened to me before, and hasn't happened since the 2-3 months after I quit. Sometimes I get shaky now when I even think about DXM- definately not in some addict way, but almost like nervous apprehension. Finally, my vision has dropped off significantly since I started. I don't know if it is related, but before I started I had 20/20 vision and now I could definately use contacts. The only reason I mention it is because I would often get double-vision on higher plateau trips and would have to close one of my eyes to see straight- I figure this could be stressful on my eyes.
The scary part of this all was that I never noticed any of these effects until I stopped. It was such a gradual decline in my word choices that I never noticed it until I looked back on how I was before. That's the insinuous part about drugs- they do change or even damage you, it just happens too slow to take much notice of.
I'm not telling you not to do drugs at all. I'm just saying that be prepared to face the consequences if you do...
If you are going to get into it anyway, try for pure powder, I'm sure it can still be obtained if you look around. It's much cheaper and better quality and doesn't taste like sewage. If you must go with the syrup, avoid anything with Pseudoephedrine and especially Chlorpheniramine Maleate. Make sure DXM is the only active ingredient, or only DXM and Guaifenisen (sp?) - also, I would recommend imposing a limit of about 50-100 trips in a lifetime. That is about the time I started noticing some of the effects on my vocabulary. Also, this should go without saying but read up on it on www.erowid.com and www.dextroverse.org.
Be safe, don't take too much, and realize you aren't taking some "medicine" but a powerful psycotropic drug, and anyone who say it is safe and there are no effects is probably high right now. Who knows what other effects I haven't noticed- I'm sure if there was a before and after CAT scan of my brain, it would show something I haven't thought of. Just think down the road and you'll see.
Sorry for the long first post, I just figure it is something worth sharing.
I woke up a few hours feeling normal but still freaked out from the events of the morning. I went outside and noticed nothing out of the ordinary- kind of disappointed that I couldn't speak to people through telepathy, but happy I was sane (now) and scared about how insane I was earlier. It really changed my view on mind-altering drugs. I looked back at my years of tripping and realized that all it lead to. Sure it was fun, the same way skydiving is fun. While you are falling, its the greatest feeling in the world. Everything is beneath you, and you know you will land safely- theres a 99.99% chance you will at least. Until, one day, your parachute malfunctions and you crash into the ground. Below everyone. Dead. And even if you land safely, it was only fun while it lasted, it doesn't benefit you in any way.
After all of this, I still felt the urge to trip a bit more- just to see if it was a fluke, etc. Sure I didn't go insane, but I just had this uncomfortable feeling all along the 8 hour span of the trip. Not my idea of a good time. After 300 trips, the drug had lost it's magic. I swore it off, and haven't regretted it. I look back at those summers with a smile. I wish I could repeat them but at the same time, I know they will never come again- which might I add, is a good thing. No matter how good a drug is, you can never do it for the rest of your life, sooner or later it will catch up with you.
Now to end things out, I'll tell you about what the effects of DXM use over the years have been. Honestly, I still don't feel normal. My skills in speaking had dropped off the deep end, it was almost hard to hold conversations despite having a world of stories and ideas to talk about. Just finding the right word to use, common words, sometimes became an exercise in frustration. It has slowly come back, but I don't know if it will ever be quite the same. For awhile after I quit, I had dreams where I would be tripping and then I would wake from the dream and would still be in another dream, just I wouldn't know it until I woke up again and again. Finally I would wake up (for real) and I would be paralyzed for a few seconds- really scary. Never happened to me before, and hasn't happened since the 2-3 months after I quit. Sometimes I get shaky now when I even think about DXM- definately not in some addict way, but almost like nervous apprehension. Finally, my vision has dropped off significantly since I started. I don't know if it is related, but before I started I had 20/20 vision and now I could definately use contacts. The only reason I mention it is because I would often get double-vision on higher plateau trips and would have to close one of my eyes to see straight- I figure this could be stressful on my eyes.
The scary part of this all was that I never noticed any of these effects until I stopped. It was such a gradual decline in my word choices that I never noticed it until I looked back on how I was before. That's the insinuous part about drugs- they do change or even damage you, it just happens too slow to take much notice of.
I'm not telling you not to do drugs at all. I'm just saying that be prepared to face the consequences if you do...
If you are going to get into it anyway, try for pure powder, I'm sure it can still be obtained if you look around. It's much cheaper and better quality and doesn't taste like sewage. If you must go with the syrup, avoid anything with Pseudoephedrine and especially Chlorpheniramine Maleate. Make sure DXM is the only active ingredient, or only DXM and Guaifenisen (sp?) - also, I would recommend imposing a limit of about 50-100 trips in a lifetime. That is about the time I started noticing some of the effects on my vocabulary. Also, this should go without saying but read up on it on www.erowid.com and www.dextroverse.org.
Be safe, don't take too much, and realize you aren't taking some "medicine" but a powerful psycotropic drug, and anyone who say it is safe and there are no effects is probably high right now. Who knows what other effects I haven't noticed- I'm sure if there was a before and after CAT scan of my brain, it would show something I haven't thought of. Just think down the road and you'll see.
Sorry for the long first post, I just figure it is something worth sharing.
