Tiger Eye journal

[Tiger Eye]

Tiger Eye boot camp journal

Hello, everyone!

All right. I’m officially in DJ boot camp now. Came across the DJ site the other day and stayed up reading the boot camp book and Walden’s journal till like 3am! Inspired to action -- followed by second-thoughts and doubts. And excuses. The usual.

Finally figured out I have absolutely nothing to lose. The whole point is the build confidence and get over that fear of rejection bs, right? Been trying similar ideas hit and miss for several months, but I like the structure of the boot camp – seems more focused and effective.

So I’m in. Also taking a cue from Walden and posting a daily progress report. That seems important, to keep me motivated to work on this every single day instead of blowing it off and procrastinating. If I start slacking off I need the old-timers on here to call me on it.

Okay, so this is Week 1, Day 1. Time to go knock out some EC and HIs. Week one should be easy. And two. It’s weeks 3 thru 8 that I don’t want to think about right now.

 

[Tiger Eye]

Went out for a couple of hours this evening, Not into the bar scene so my practice ground was a dept. store and a couple of grocery stores.

Walked into the dept store, and right by the cashiers there was a girl checking out these folding camping chairs on sale. I almost walked on by, but caught myself and stopped and pretended to be interested in them, too. Trying to get some EC from her and say hi. She doesn’t look at me, but finally sits down in a chair to test it out, which gives me the opening to ask the obvious, “Is it comfortable?” She says yes, turns friendly and we start talking about camping chairs. I try to think of some way to shift the convo to another level, remember something in the DJ bible about getting her to talk about how she feels, but go blank and the convo ends. Guess I could’ve said, “So how do you feeeeeel about camping chairs?” LOL... Anyway, it was cool to stumble into a convo right off the bat. She was a 5, nothing special, just practice.

After that I spent some time roaming up and down the aisles, searching for people to try and make eye contact with and say hi. Or “how’s it going,” sounds better, less cheesy, more casual. But as others here have pointed out, most strangers won’t give you enough EC to get out a “how’s it going.” Most strangers won’t even look at you at all. So I probably cross paths with at least 30 people in this store, maybe 10 actually meet my gaze for a second or two, and I manage four hi’s. I think three said hi back and one ignored me. Eventually I start feeling like everyone’s wondering who this weirdo is wandering all over the store trying to stare everybody down, so I leave. And as I’m walking out the door this nice looking blond is headed in pushing a shopping cart with her head down, not really looking where she’s going. We’re on a direct collision course, and I think here’s the perfect chance for another Hi, I won’t move out of her way and she’ll be forced to look up and acknowledge me, and that’s when I’ll say hi. So what happens? She rolls her cart up to me and stops. And doesn’t look up! She just stands there with her head down, looking at my... crotch, I guess. Unbelievable! I just stepped aside and left.

Next stop grocery store. Actually I parked a few blocks away and walked past several shops and bars on the way to the grocery store in one of Seattle’s funky little neighborhoods. Sidewalk cafés, too, several of those, plenty of opportunity to say hi to people, more eye contact, but kinda lost my momentum during the drive from the dept store to here, and could not bring myself to speak a single word to anyone out on the street. In the grocery store I manange to force out three more hi’s as I picked up a few things, up to 7 for the night. My goal was to get 10, so I only need 3 more, but I’m starting to feel burnt out. I practically force myself to go to another grocery store, and even though the place is almost empty I get 3 more hi’s and hit my goal. Then walk around the neighborhood a bit just for the hell of it and get two more hi’s.

So I’m up to 12. And it’s harder than I thought. But it’s a start.

 

[duke007]

Great to see another journal like this. I'm looking forward to it!

Be proud of yourself, you did well!

But with a bit more experience and confidence you could have used C+F on that blonde that stared at your crotch

 

[Tiger Eye]

week 1 day 2

Fri afternoon...

Thanks Duke... you’re absolutely right about the blonde, but not ready for that yet.

Just got back from a couple of errands, knocked out another 9 hi’s in less than 30 minutes! Plus chatted up the cashiers at a store (a 3, bleh, and a very cute, very jailbait honey.) Much more relaxed than last night, today it’s too easy. Timing is key on the walk-by EC and greet, instead of staring at them and waiting for them to look at me, just be aware of the person as I approach and then look their way when I get within speaking distance, then right when (and if) they meet my EC toss a casual “how’s it going” at them. Just felt a lot more natural today, last night I think I was forcing it too much. No real HBs today though, and that’s the thing for me, I’ve been doing this hi thing for months now to overcome my lifelong shyness, just not such a condensed effort. I should be able to get 50 hi’s in the next day or so, and from there I think the rest of week one I need to start over with the goal of 50 greets to fukkable women ONLY. Now that’s a goal outside my comfort zone. But doable. I think.

-----------------------------------

Fri nite...

Was in a great mood tonight at work! Energized and confident, joking with the guys, teasing the girls and chatting up the customers. This DJ thing has got me all pumped up, just making up my mind to take some serious action to change things, I guess. I deliver pizzas to pay the bills, so I’m out in public all night, occasionally running into people in elevators and hallways and sidewalks, ect. – got 7 more greets tonight, not counting customers (I’m paid to say hi to them.)

Also tried the neg hit on a HB8 that I delivered to, a tight little early 20s blond. She ordered a pizza, salad and a 6 pack of coke, and I joked and said, “Is this all for you?” She smiled kinda sheepish and said yeah, and I said “No way! Oh my god, you’re a pig!” And she ate it up!!! Actually, this little incident was an important step, the first crack of daylight into my dark old beliefs about women. You can give the hotties sh#t, and they actually LIKE it! Well, the young ones like it, anyway. And this one was really too young for me.... okay who am I kidding, I wouldn’t kick that out of bed! However, 30-35yo is more the age range I’m into. Okay, 25 – 35. But let’s see how well the c/f works on the older ladies before I get too excited about this.

But doing the c/f on my HB deliveries (and I get my fair share) looks like a great way to practice and build some confidence about this. I mean, I’m the pizza guy, they’re expecting me, so their defenses are already down. Yeah, this has possibilities... short term, and maybe longterm.

Anyway, today was a good day. I know the confidence will ebb and flow, but right now it’s on and I’m going to enjoy it.

LIFE ROCKS! BRING IT ON!

 

[Tiger Eye]

week 1 day 3

Rode my bike to a “STOP BUSH!” rally downtown today. (Don’t get me started on U.S. politics!) Needed 22 more generic hi/greets to hit that 50, and I got those. Pretty easy in a crowd united around a common cause, lots of context, as Walden calls it, and I just kept roaming around instead of standing in one place. Also got 3 short convos with non-HB people, and one WAY TOO LONG convo with a guy I suspect was maybe a card or two short of a full deck. How to GET THE HELL OUT of a convo is another skill I need.

Anyway, so that’s the first 50 greets, and most of those I got a good solid response back, and now it’s onto my goal of greeting 50 HBs by day 7. I’m going to keep greeting everyone I can, seems a great way to keep the momentum going, but I’m only keeping track of the HBs. My basic criteria is whether or not I’d fukk her. If she’s fukkable (right now that would be a 6 or above for me) then I count the greet. Got 8 fukkable greets today on top of the other 22, so I’m off to a good start, including a hot little black chick with a funky hat. As I walked past her I leaned in, touched her on the shoulder and just said, “Cute hat.” A simple little compliment and she lights up with this great big smile. Choked on some opportunities, too, including an HB I caught looking at me (!) but that’s okay, just gotta remember that 3 second rule.

Played with the c/f a bit more, too. And actually nailed the best opportunity of the day. An HB and her friend were locking their bikes up, the HB squatting down as she wrapped the chain around her bike. (man, I love to see a hot woman squatting from behind -- whew!) So I’m walking by them, trying to get some EC for a greet, and accidentally kick the HB’s anti-Bush cardboard sign lying on the sidewalk. So I stop and pick it up, say something like, “Aw, man, I’m walking on your sign.” She just shrugs and says, “That’s okay, it was lying there in your way.” Then notice what her sign says -- this crude homemade sign made from the side of a cardboard box. Scrawled on it is this:
“The only Bush I trust is the one Between my Legs” (!!!!!)
As I give the sign back to her I said, “Hmm... you know, I don’t have a bush... Can I trust yours instead?” And her and her friend both burst out laughing! So BANG -- just like that I’m in. And me being the Lady Killer that I am, I immediately quit while I’m ahead and get the hell out of there! LOL.... Anyway, to be honest I’m a natural at c/f, I just have to have the confidence to be able to relax around the HBs. I’ll get there, hell I’m already making progress and it’s only day 3!

Worked again tonight, got another HB greet in a hotel lobby. 9 greets down, 41 to go, 4 days left in Week 1. That’s 10 a day, every day. Wow, seems like a lot of HBs to find.... need to stick with large crowds. But I can do this.

ONWARD!

 

[zach]

Tiger, you sound like your doing good. Reading your post has given me more initiative. I too am on Week one and I think I will post my journal as well.

Eventually I start feeling like everyone’s wondering who this weirdo is wandering all over the store trying to stare everybody down

I got this feeling a lot when I started (before I officially started the boot camp last thursday.)

 

[SamePendo]

Great! keep it up!

 

[Tiger Eye]

week 1 day 4

Hey, SamePendo, thanks for the thumbs up!

Today I spent a couple of hours at a weekend outdoor flea market thing, got 5 HB greets and a little convo, all pretty much 6s. Slim pickings, not many babes at all, and most of those were with bf.

Choked on a handful, too -- one particular choke that annoys me, a HB7 strutting like she was the hottest fukking thing on the planet. I wanted to break into that one bad, just to take her down a notch, and kinda paced her for a while looking for an opening, but her and her friend kept browsing booths selling girly stuff. Couldn’t get myself to follow her into that, thinking why the hell would a guy be looking at dresses and ear rings? To hit on the chick, of course, she would know that immediately, and for me to move in there and say, “hi,” then turn around and leave -- that fukking reeks of DORKSVILLE. And for me to hang out next to her waiting for a c/f opp to present itself, with her knowing I’m trying to hit on her, and her and her friend smirking back and forth at my expense... nope, that scenario felt like trying to storm a machine gun nest with a water pistol. Too tricky for a fledgling DJ like me, so I abandoned it. Although sure enough, at one point she tried on some silver-mirrored sunglasses, and a great neg hit popped into my head, but I was too far away to use it. Oh fukking well.

Later...
Another 4 HB greets at work tonight, including a HB8 30-something brunette. And after thinking about it, maybe I was trying too hard earlier today. I just have to greet the HBs -- that’s where I’m at in the boot camp. I don’t have to come up with something cute or clever every fukking time, if nothing else a “hi” will do just fine.

18 down, 32 to go.

 

[Nicholas Hill]

I'll never be able to read all of these journals from everyone ... I'll try to catch up every now and then, but I love the way people are actually starting to take action! I'm really pleased.

Nick

 

[dionysius_d]

Good read. Entertaining.

I too am finding context and situation so important.. maybe more than eye contact.

Anything that can form a link between u and her..

 

[Tiger Eye]

week 1 day 5

Hey thanks, dionysius_d -- I'm trying to hit the highlights of each day without turning this thing into a novel. And I agree, it's all about finding or creating that link.

Spent the day biking with a buddy of mine, got 4 HB greets along the way. Told him what I was doing with the DJ thing, he thinks it’s a good idea. He’s not a DJ, but not really AFC either, somewhere inbetween.... married, although I think he kinda regrets it. His wife is okay but frankly nothing special. I fully intend to get married again one day, somewhere down the road, but I refuse to settle for "nothing special." That's why I'm here, that's why I'm doing this. To learn how to attract and keep the creme of the crop. I don't need a dozen, one HB9 to grow old with will do just fine.

Was pretty beat when I got home, and probably the best thing would’ve been for me to call it a day, but felt compelled to go out and get more greets so I don’t fall behind. So I did, went to the mall (useless venue for me), then to Greenlake park and walked part way around the lake as the sun set. Nice sunset, plenty of opps, but just couldn’t get myself into DJ mode. Frustrating, but that’s the way it was. Finally blew it off and started walking back to my car.

On the way three HB6s are walking toward me drinking frappacinos or something, the middle one licking her straw by dragging it sideways across her mouth. An easy opp, so I say, “Taste good?” She’s completely taken by surprise and says, “Wha...?” It takes her a second to realize a stranger’s actually broken into her space, and she barely makes EC just as we pass each other. We both glance back over our shoulders, and she belts out, “Hell yeah!” Which makes her two friends laugh, and gives me a rush, too -- gotta love a girl with spunk. Amazing how a little success can brighten one’s mood in an instant. So anyway, the evening wasn’t a complete waste.

23 down, 27 to go. And I work the next two nights.

Any experienced DJs got any ideas on where 30+ yo HBs would hang out on a weekday afternoon? Besides work?

 

[Tiger Eye]

week 1 day 6

All right, maybe I do have a brain after all. Where is the highest concentration of older HBs during the day? Downtown. What are they doing there? Working. When would they most likely be out of the office and on the street? Lunch time!

Except I didn’t really feel up to DJing. Didn’t sleep worth a damn last night for some reason, and basically felt groggy and out of it this morning. But I went for a long walk that got the blood flowing, and finally decided I might as well go and at least check it out.

So I drove downtown, parked and hit the streets. Immediately find myself standing next to a HB7 at an intersection, just the two of us, waiting for the light to change. There’s no cross-traffic within blocks at that moment, but we’re both waiting for a stupid light to tell us it’s safe to cross the street. So I tell her, “There’s no traffic -- make a run for it!” And she comes right back with, “You first.” (she’s playing with me!) But being in “Hi-mode,” I had nothing else to say, so that was that. What I should’ve done was say, “Okay,” then grab her hand and make her run across the street with me. Now THAT would’ve been cool! Just didn’t think of it till later...

But that first one warms me up, so I just relax and kinda go with the flow. End up at Pike Place Market, and the place is just this huge sensory feast, bustling with people, and I could feel myself feeding off the energy of it all. Opps all over the place to strike up conversation, and I had a blast chatting with all kinds of people. End up with 16 HB greets in an hour and a half, most of them there at the Market. Definitely will be spending more time there!

The one that really made my day, though, was this classy blonde, maybe not quite a 9, but definitely an 8+ -- by far the sexiest woman I’ve dared to break the ice with. Ever. I round a corner and there she is with a digital camera, taking a picture of something. I say the first thing that pops into my head, “Get a good shot?” just to say something, anything, to her, and for whatever reason she finds that amusing. Good EC as she chuckles and smiles as I walk by. I look back over my shoulder, and she looks at me again, gives me more EC and an even bigger smile! I just strut on outta there thinking I’M THE MAN! (yeah, too chicken for convo)

39 down, 11 to go. Looks like I’ll be heading back downtown again tomorrow to wrap this week up.

 

[Meis]

This is great, keep up the good work!

 

[Toronto's Finest]

good stuff!

Glad to see you so excited, these bootcamp journals are money!! Your'e doing good man, keep it up
I used to be shy too, took months of EC+hi's to get out of that, but now i think i'm ready for the heavy duty DJ'ing. If you ever have a week where you just crash and burn just be honest about it, some of these bootcamp journals seem too good to be true (by that i mean such huge progress in so little time). I always thought you needed to have time to let these habits germinate and solidify in your mind/personality before you're able to take it to the next level/week, I'll definitely be coming back to see your progress, very proud of you bro!

 

[Tiger Eye]

week 1 day 7

Mission accomplished! Another downtown lunch and I glided across the finish line pretty effortlessly. Hit 50, stopped counting, and just kept on going till the time ran out of my parking meter. Almost tried a number close on a girl running one of the booths at PPM, but my courage faltered when I started thinking about having to do it with a bunch of other people around. No big deal, though, I know where to find her, and I’m more than willing to take this process one step at a time. And most importantly, she’s just one girl, no one special, just one of over 50 HBs I’ve dared to show some interest in the past week. Up till now I haven’t tried to make contact with 50 good-looking women MY ENTIRE LIFE.

Thanks for the boost, Meis. And Toronto, I’m just putting it down the way it happens, day by day. For all I know I could hit a wall at some point in the Boot Camp and just not be able to get past it, and if that happens it will be in here. And like you I wonder just how well this is all going to "stick" in the long run, but right now I’m not concerned with that. Just trying to stay in the present moment, take it step by step and see where I’m at after Week 8.

I will say that right now I feel FUKKING GREAT!!! Operating at a level of self-confidence that’s been sadly missing most of my adult life. Just by going out into the world and engaging with strangers on the street. And what’s really interesting is that I don’t feel like I’m trying to act different or forcing myself to be someone I’m not. At first it was like that, but not now, not the past couple of days. Instead, it feels like I’m finally allowing my true nature to express itself to any and everybody, expressing who I really am underneath all the fears and phobias and cultural conditioning. It’s pretty fukking amazing.

 

[Tiger Eye]

week 2 day 1

So this week’s exercise is about 2-10 min conversations with 10 strangers. One 2 min convo today with an HB5 that didn’t really go anywhere. It’s easy enough for me now to start a convo about some inane subject to break the ice, but my problem is sustaining it and getting it to go somewhere interesting after that. Another thing I need to work on is my EC when I’m speaking. I have no problem maintaining EC when someone is talking to me, I’ve developed the good listening skills. But I find it difficult to look into their eyes when I’M speaking to THEM. It’s a little uncomfortable and I feel like I’ll lose my train of thought. So those two areas are what I’m focussing on this week as I go about the exercise. There’s nothing to do about it but practice, practice, practice.... at least now I’m not afraid to get out there and practice.

Definitely a lot easier to approach people cold now than it was a week ago, in fact today I was noticing that it felt natural to greet the people I encounter as I go about my business -- and actually felt a bit uncomfortable NOT to say something, like I was snubbing them somehow.

One other development... got a nibble on my online personal ad the other day, and I’ve been DJing it with her. She called and left a message with her work number this morning (I was here but didn’t pick up), then a little later when I don’t call her back she sends me an email:

“Oooooooo.... I don't usually give out my home number but I'm going to take a chance this time. I just have a feeling. I really want to hear about your artistry and the realm(s) it may inhabit...so: (###) ###-####......I did leave you a message this morning.”

Yeah... she wants me. LOL....

This DJ sh#t really works. See if I can keep it together long enough with her to get those panties off.

 

[Slickster]

Tiger you have a unique writing style which keeps me wanting more. Are you DJing me?

Seriously though good work! It's great you're taking the time to do this in steps. I would have skipped a few and tried for more conversations with some of those "Hi's".

You say you're having troubles keeping EC while you're talking well I bet. Its totally unnatural to keep EC all the time! Probably creepy too. You ever talk with someone who won't look away. Its annoying as all hell. Keep it natural.

You say you're having trouble keeping conversations going? This may help. On top of looking for HB's you must also always be on the lookout for *openers*. Things to start conversations, new ideas, topics, or threads. If a picture is worth a 1000 words every scenario you find yourself in there should be a million things to talk about. The more you do this you'll be amazed the types of conversations you'll be having with complete strangers.

Just my 2 cents. Keep up the great work. You've got a great attitude. Many will learn from you.

 

[Tiger Eye]

week 2 day 2

Thanks Slickster. I would’ve tried for more convo with the Hi’s last week if I’d had the fukking balls to go for it. Just moving at my own pace, which is all anyone can expect to do.

With the EC, I think there’s a kind of balance to achieve with that, yes, too much can sometimes be weird, but too little definitely comes across as meek and insecure. Just matching the amount of EC to the person I’m talking to, I guess is what I’m trying to do now. If they look at me 50% of the time while speaking to me, then I should look at them 50% of the time when I’m speaking to them. Or 30 or 80 or whatever.

Tonight at work I decided to start picking out an opener and attempt a convo with every person I deliver a pizza to. A picture on their wall, the dog, the cat, something they’re wearing, whatever. Just to get to over the fear of running out of something to say. And now that I think about it, maybe it’s about linking my mind to my mouth and becoming more articulate. It’s not like I’m a moron with nothing but dust bunnies in my head, it’s just a matter of developing the skill to express myself better verbally.

No big breakthrough convos today, but a couple that maybe lasted two minutes. I don’t wear a watch so it’s hard for me to judge the time, but these two felt solid enough to count for the exercise, though one with an HB had maybe a little too much “nice guy” mixed in. But let’s call it 3 convos down and 7 to go. The breakthrough I’m looking for is a convo with someone that hits a deep enough level that makes me go “Wow, this is a cool person that I’d really like to get to know better.” Seems impossible at this point, impossible to accomplish in 2-10 minutes, anyway. Maybe I’m expecting too much.

Meanwhile I felt a bit of a dilemma with the online girl. She’s given me her home phone number and obviously wants me to call her. Of course any DJ worth the money is going to be way too busy during a long Labor Day weekend to contact a new girl, yet I felt uncomfortable just ignoring her till next week, afraid she’d be annoyed by the time I actually made the call. (yeah, I know, total nice guy thinking, but there it is) I wasn’t going to call her over the weekend, determined to stick with the DJ guidelines about that, yet she emails me her home number and then I just disappear for several days? Didn’t feel right, seemed too cold, so today I sent a quick email reply:

“Hey Susan, I'm busy thru the holiday, I'll hook up with you next week and we can go out and have some fun. Later....”

I like this for several reasons.
1. it makes ME feel much better about the situation. LOL... But really, that’s important. Now I won’t be obsessed with wondering if she’s going to be a pissed off b#tch when I call.
2. shows I’m a busy guy in a hurry right now.
3. but also shows common courtesy -- I’m not a jerk.
4. (I really like this) it plants the seed that we’re going out next week – that when I call her it will not be to “get to know each other,” but to set up a date. And if she’s reluctant to go out right now, it gives her all weekend to get used to the idea, and by Monday night she’ll be thinking, hey, why not?

I’m a genius! A Master DJ!! The God of Master DJs!!!

Oh, who am I kidding... I’m bluffing my way through this left and right.

She’s just one girl. I met 50 others last week. Have to keep reminding myself of that.

 

[jsgii]

Good job my man. I'll be starting week 2 monday

You got the power

 

[Walden]

LOL .T.E. Nice post.