This is what makes me feel incredibly hopeless in dating

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bigdave17

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I will ask you again, what do you have to offer a lady aside from $$$? Ladies, in general, make their own money, so this is really not as important initially. As you enter into an LTR or hell forbid, marriage, then it becomes more of an issue.
I'm pretty solid at everything across the board

I'm loyal as hell, unselfish, honest, intelligent, affectionate, huge sex drive and very good in bed, obviously excellent in terms of financial situation, pretty good looking and in shape, love kids, fantastic lifestyle, etc... I'm very nice without being a pushover at all - I try to balance that fine line. I'll do anything for my friends but If I feel that they're acting like *******s, I'll speak up immediately.


If you are heart set on ladies who look like or are Karen Vi, Bebe Rexha, or Arianna Grande; we'll that may be a tough mountain to climb. Who knows, it may be possible if you get yourself 100 and on point in everything.
when did I say I want somebody who looks like Arianna Grande?

Dude listen to me, take a 100 women who workout hard, diet and put in a real effort to look good... probably 70 of them will be very attractive to me. Arianna grande has 1 in 100 facial bone structure genetics. That's not what I'm asking for.

As far as my natural and easy dating opportunities - it's always garbage. I had these 2 chubby Spanish girls today at my gym who wouldn't stop staring at me hardcore while I was training shoulders. I had another fat Indian girl at a bar who tried 6 times to talk to me 2 weeks ago. That's who I get natural and easy dating opportunities with nowadays.
 

RickTheToad

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I'm pretty solid at everything across the board

I'm loyal as hell, unselfish, honest, intelligent, affectionate, huge sex drive and very good in bed, obviously excellent in terms of financial situation, pretty good looking and in shape, love kids, fantastic lifestyle, etc... I'm very nice without being a pushover at all - I try to balance that fine line. I'll do anything for my friends but If I feel that they're acting like *******s, I'll speak up immediately.




when did I say I want somebody who looks like Arianna Grande?

Dude listen to me, take a 100 women who workout hard, diet and put in a real effort to look good... probably 70 of them will be very attractive to me. Arianna grande has 1 in 100 facial bone structure genetics. That's not what I'm asking for.

As far as my natural and easy dating opportunities - it's always garbage. I had these 2 chubby Spanish girls today at my gym who wouldn't stop staring at me hardcore while I was training shoulders. I had another fat Indian girl at a bar who tried 6 times to talk to me 2 weeks ago. That's who I get natural and easy dating opportunities with nowadays.
It was in one of your bagillion posts about you and your dating life. You have very high standards dude. Very high. You should start considering ladies on a lower level then what you desire. 3 years w/o sex. Wow. You're better than that.
 

bigdave17

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It was in one of your bagillion posts about you and your dating life. You have very high standards dude. Very high. You should start considering ladies on a lower level then what you desire. 3 years w/o sex. Wow. You're better than that.
Dude listen to me, take a 100 women who workout hard, diet and put in a real effort to look good... probably 70 of them will be very attractive to me. Arianna grande has 1 in 100 facial bone structure genetics. That's not what I'm asking for.

Realistically speaking, I'm asking for female version of myself or a little less attractive than myself even.

You say I have very high standards because women are judged on a ridiculously curved scale. A 6/10 chick who works out and has a nice body, has no kids, between 23-30, is somewhat intelligent and classy, has no stupid tattoos, good family values, decent job and decent with finances is considered a goddess. Newsflash - that's all common sense stuff that everybody should have.
 

bigdave17

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And where has all of that gotten you?

You should be shining the light on and conquering your greatest WEAKNESS.

But you don’t want to do that.
I had many easy opportunities from 16-26, destroyed them all due to crippling anxiety and non existent self esteem


now I've fixed a lot of that and the easy opportunities are non existent anymore. The only easy opportunities I get now is the nonsense at the gym - the chubby Spanish girls who wouldn't stop staring at me... this is despite being better looking and better in every way than I've ever been before.
 

lamath

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I had many easy opportunities from 16-26, destroyed them all due to crippling anxiety and non existent self esteem


now I've fixed a lot of that and the easy opportunities are non existent anymore. The only easy opportunities I get now is the nonsense at the gym - the chubby Spanish girls who wouldn't stop staring at me... this is despite being better looking and better in every way than I've ever been before.
You are doing it wrong.
It shoud be easier with age.
 

bigdave17

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You are doing it wrong.
It shoud be easier with age.
where does this ridiculous myth come from?

As you get older, you meet less and less women via natural daily routine. Women are tribal, heavily social creatures. If they don't meet you through friends or through work or something, you basically have to be a 9/10 or you don't exist in their world.

This myth that being better looking as you get to 30, more successful, more educated, wise, mature, etc.... None of that sh*t is even 1/10th as important as the ability to naturally meet women via your daily routine

There are 21 year old, chubby, drunken, idiotic frat boys without 2 pennies to rub together who are nowhere near as polished, well spoken, in shape, successful, well dressed, etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... as myself who can easily get a high quality girlfriend in 30 seconds because they meet them naturally and constantly everyday. Me? I can't even get a date with anybody worthwhile
 

bigdave17

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This is why you’re attracting garbage, Dave.

Garbage comes easy. Good things do not.

You’re old enough to know this by now.
when I was in college, I had easy opportunities with high quality women and destroyed them due to crippling self esteem issues.

I beat myself up over it everyday. I should have met someone in college and married her. I absolutely hate the dating game and being in the position I am in. Even worse, I believed the lie that dating would get easier as I got older if I made myself a great catch. I worked obsessively hard at improving every aspect of myself and dating became harder and harder every year
 

bigdave17

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You weren't very loyal to those poor ladies who were below your standards.
hahaha

In all seriousness, I'm old school soviet union values. We're incredibly loyal, ride or die, do anything to our loved ones but if you cross us, we will always get you back threefold
 

lamath

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Its not about look or $
With age you get more confident an experienced.
 

bigdave17

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Its not about look or $
With age you get more confident an experienced.
as you get older, you meet less and less quality and single women via natural daily routine.


relying on things like cold approach and online dating is like relying on the lottery. Yea you might win but the odds are incredibly stacked against you (especially if you're not top 1% of men in looks and just a measly pathetic top 20%er, that basically means nothing nowadays). I don't give a f*ck how experienced you are, you have to get opportunities for that to matter. I'm not that experienced but if I got any actual opportunities, I would absolutely crush it.
 

RickTheToad

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as you get older, you meet less and less quality and single women via natural daily routine.


relying on things like cold approach and online dating is like relying on the lottery. Yea you might win but the odds are incredibly stacked against you (especially if you're not top 1% of men in looks and just a measly pathetic top 20%er, that basically means nothing nowadays). I don't give a f*ck how experienced you are, you have to get opportunities for that to matter. I'm not that experienced but if I got any actual opportunities, I would absolutely crush it.
Why not spend more time in the City of Chicago? I am sure you'll meet loads of attractive ladies there. I know when I go to Stamford or Manhattan, I do not have issues with interacting with attractive ladies. You live in the suburbs. I think that's an issue you need to overcome. I live in Bridgeport, if I want any decent ladies, I need to go to Greenwich/Stamford, Yonkers, or NYC.
 

allancc3

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I've visited Chicago a bunch of times on business trips. I was never that impressed with the quality of the women there. Big cities are generally over-rated. Miami, eh. LA. Eh. Chicago. Eh. SF is pretty fvckin' bad. Not even mediocre. San Jose is soul crushing and depressingly bad. Contrary to popular stereotype, big cities are not necessarily hotbeds of hot women. Perhaps they were 50 or 60 years ago. Now every city has been trashed with homeless, drug addicts, foreign import workers (almost all male) and a ton of other obvious problems that require no restating here.

Perhaps the most noticeable problem impacting dating in a negative way is that most large cities are now flooded with well to do tech nerds who are socially awkward, ugly, desperate and willing to spend any amount of money to date and keep a girl. Hence the San Francisco 49ers. 4's who think they're 9's. A huge percentage of these guys are Indian, and these guys are the most desperate of the desperate. They are turning entire neighborhoods into comedy central caliber sh1t shows. It is appalling how weak their game is, and how repulsive women find them.

As a secondary or tertiary or perhaps non-consideration, it's really difficult to find even one or two good wingmen in these cities as well.

I got my spots and I'm not givin' 'em up. Whatever dave's problems, and they appear to be both numerous and intractable, avoiding Chicago is not one of them.
 

PeasantPlayer

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I've visited Chicago a bunch of times on business trips. I was never that impressed with the quality of the women there. Big cities are generally over-rated. Miami, eh. LA. Eh. Chicago. Eh. SF is pretty fvckin' bad. Not even mediocre. San Jose is soul crushing and depressingly bad. Contrary to popular stereotype, big cities are not necessarily hotbeds of hot women. Perhaps they were 50 or 60 years ago. Now every city has been trashed with homeless, drug addicts, foreign import workers (almost all male) and a ton of other obvious problems that require no restating here.

Perhaps the most noticeable problem impacting dating in a negative way is that most large cities are now flooded with well to do tech nerds who are socially awkward, ugly, desperate and willing to spend any amount of money to date and keep a girl. Hence the San Francisco 49ers. 4's who think they're 9's. A huge percentage of these guys are Indian, and these guys are the most desperate of the desperate. They are turning entire neighborhoods into comedy central caliber sh1t shows. It is appalling how weak their game is, and how repulsive women find them.

As a secondary or tertiary or perhaps non-consideration, it's really difficult to find even one or two good wingmen in these cities as well.

I got my spots and I'm not givin' 'em up. Whatever dave's problems, and they appear to be both numerous and intractable, avoiding Chicago is not one of them.
I've mentioned that on this board before about Chicago not having too many good looking women. For the 3rd largest city in America the women look pretty mediocre. Apart of that is the gang culture here. They run trains on these chicks all through high school and get them hooked on drugs, by the time they are in their early 20s the women are popped. Getting banged and drugged up by a group of gang members for years will do that. Another factor is the weather women let themselves go in the winter time and most never make it back, they gain weight, lose motivation get stretch marks. The pretty girls usually get hooked to the night life scene downtown and up being Coke ***** alcoholics. No city treats their women as bad as Chicago imo at least in America. Final factor is the transplant women from Minnesota, Michigan, Wisconsin, Iowa and NY and LA and they are plain Jane types
 

PeasantPlayer

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The irony for me is the women in the north suburbs of Chicago where Bigdave resides look better on average. They look healthier and have usually not been trained to be a *** rag by gang members. Some of the prettiest girls I've seen were from the north suburbs.
 

RickTheToad

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I've mentioned that on this board before about Chicago not having too many good looking women. For the 3rd largest city in America the women look pretty mediocre. Apart of that is the gang culture here. They run trains on these chicks all through high school and get them hooked on drugs, by the time they are in their early 20s the women are popped. Getting banged and drugged up by a group of gang members for years will do that. Another factor is the weather women let themselves go in the winter time and most never make it back, they gain weight, lose motivation get stretch marks. The pretty girls usually get hooked to the night life scene downtown and up being Coke ***** alcoholics. No city treats their women as bad as Chicago imo at least in America. Final factor is the transplant women from Minnesota, Michigan, Wisconsin, Iowa and NY and LA and they are plain Jane types
Is Chicago that bad? I know it's a tough city, but there have to be some attractive ladies there. They're probably hanging around in Hoffman Estates then. Lol. Well, it has to be better than Detroit.
 

PeasantPlayer

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Is Chicago that bad? I know it's a tough city, but there have to be some attractive ladies there. They're probably hanging around in Hoffman Estates then. Lol. Well, it has to be better than Detroit.
Hoffman estates is 35 minutes from Chicago. Chicago is pretty bad it has nice parts. It's a big city
 

sosousage

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You need to stop jerking off for a month, do no fap. Then also order yourself Чабрец and drink it with tea everyday, it will raise your testosterone, increase your sex drive, make you last longer and many other positive things. All in all you will naturally be seeking ways to meet ass and stop asking dumb questions.

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Hes just unhappy
 

Create self-fulfilling prophecies. Always assume the positive. Assume she likes you. Assume she wants to talk to you. Assume she wants to go out with you. When you think positive, positive things happen.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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