Highly doubtful. Usually it's guys trying to blame the woman for the way they act instead of realizing their behaviors have enabled them to act in this way and thinking they act that way will all guys instead of just them.
I cannot speak for all guys but in my case, and that of a friend of mine who is going through a breakup, it’s more motivated by the guy searching to make sense of WTF just happened to him when she leaves him and he needs years of therapy for the craziness she put him though. So the guy searches to make sense of it and finds BPD or B-cluster definitions, and finds that his ex or current partner matches many of the characteristics. My friend is a multi-millionaire, good lucking, great personality, in top physical shape. His live-in GF of 6 years just left him and is now living in her own home with an overweight contractor living there with her. He found out she was living a double life for years that he didn't even know about and she took him for several hundred thousand dollars through manipulation and theft. Sure he was to blame for allowing some of it to happen but for the first 4-5 years he claims there were no warning signs. Now she is hoovering him (or trying). I could tell you stories of my ex who was diagnosed with BPD, but I've already told them some years ago here.
I agree with
@Romanemp22 that there are likely FAR more undiagnosed cases than there are diagnosed cases, because one of the main characteristics of a BPD person is that they refuse to admit that they have it and usually if accused, they will turn it around and say it's YOU that has it. And because narcissism is a component of BPD, they are among the LEAST likely people to seek evaluation - why would a narcissistic person willingly seek out someone to tell them how fvcked up they are?
At the end of the day, BPD is just a label put on a grouping of characteristics that psychologist found patterns in. 30 years from now it will probably be further divided up into additional patterns and groupings. It isn't like there is any specific, physical thing inside the brain that they can point to and say, "Yeah, this is total proof." It's all just labels and groupings. But if you read about it, it is pretty vague and wishy-washy.... there are a handful of characteristics and a BDP person may possess a few, or all of them. From all I have read, it doesn't appear that there is any definitive test to positively confirm BPD - it's up to the evaluating psychologist to form their own opinion and different psychologists may have differing opinions. And as with most disorders, most psychologists I've talked to say that just like Autism, there are wide spectrums, and you can be on the low or the high end of the spectrum.
To your point about guys blaming women for things that the guy enabled them to do, I completely agree that the guy has responsibility for allowing himself to be mistreated, but that doesn't mean she doesn't have a disorder. Because it sounds like you're saying if you let a B-cluster woman mistreat you, then it's your fault and she doesn't really have a disorder. If that same BPD woman mistreats another guy, and he sets a boundary with her, do you really think she's going to stop her behavior? She won't and the strong guy will kick her to the curb, and she will move on to the next and the next and the cycle will continue. But even having said that, I don't understand the argument that it's all the man's fault for allowing a woman to mistreat him. Yes, a man should set boundaries and it is his fault if he didn't, but even so, if a given woman's natural state is to mistreat a man horribly unless she is "corrected" repeatedly by the man, how does that mean she doesn't have psychological problems? Unless you think all women live in that state?
